Tantrums and tiaras...

Picture this:  You're walking down the street passing your local sporting goods shop, let's call it Intersport, and out of the corner of your eye you see a woman wind up with a huge round-house slap to the back of the head of a boy who would have been no older than 8 or 9. The action is so big that the woman delivering it knocks herself off balance and stumbles for a couple of paces before righting herself. And everyone around continues on their way as if this was a normal occurrence, something that you would see everyday.

Most of you are perhaps thinking right now something along the lines of "but she can't do that! Smacking is illegal! Why didn't anyone do anything? Report her to the Police…" or various other indignant phrases. I saw this very scene recently when I was in New Caledonia, and perhaps on the streets of Noumea this is completely normal, but certainly not anymore back in New Zealand where our government tells us that we can no longer smack our children.

Whether you agree with the anti-smacking legislation itself or not, most people that you speak to will agree at least that the intent behind it is honourable. Which brings me to what I want to discuss this month: now that it's law, what tools do ordinary law-abiding citizens like myself and my wife have at our disposal to deal with an 18 month old daughter who will throw a tantrum if you even look at her funny?

Since very early on we've been using variations on time out as a way to cope with the Divine Miss M's temper tantrums. It started when she was a baby and we used controlled crying for her to go to sleep. And when Maddie got a little older we started to put her in her cot to chill out for a bit when it was obvious that there was actually nothing wrong and that it was in fact a tantrum that she was throwing. This worked well for us as it wasn't only a way to get Maddie to chill out, but it gave us some breathing space as parents. For those of you who haven't experienced an infant screaming at you at full bore for absolutely no apparent reason, I can assure you that it's not the most pleasant experience in the world.

The problem however with using a child's cot as a time-out space is that if you're not careful they'll soon come to associate it with a bad thing and it will affect their sleep. Now I'm no child psychologist but to me it makes sense - "I'm put in here when I'm naughty so therefore it must be a bad place. SO WHY THE HELL ARE THEY PUTTING ME HERE WHEN IT'S DARK?!!!! WAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"

This of course results in an alternative technique being sought. For us we settled on the Super Nanny's naughty spot technique and have been using it consistently since Maddie was about one. The medium for the technique is not what's important (initially we tried it with a naughty mat but soon found that our cats thought that it made a great bed for them which resulted in it consistently being covered in cat hair - we have since changed to a $4.99 plastic chair from the Warehouse), but instead it's the way in which the technique is carried out that makes it work. Therefore it's important to no matter how much you feel in that moment like letting rip and screaming right back at your child, that instead you remain calm and go down to their level, lower your voice and tell them why they are being put there and for how long (you know the drill from the TV programme - 1 minute for every year of their age). You then go into the next room, calmly set the timer and quietly fume at your child for throwing a tantrum for no good reason. See time-out does actually work both ways!!! At the end of the time you go and collect them, again telling them why they were put on the naughty spot and get a hug to say sorry and it's all good again.

Just when you think you've got everything down-pat and working is when you have to be most vigilant.  That is when your child will switch it up on you.  Most of Maddie's tantrums these days are about her growing into toddlerdom, wanting to be more independent - "no Dad I don't want to be carried, I WANT TO WALK!!"; and about us not understanding her attempts to communicate with us - "Look Dad, I've been fricking pointing at your glass of water for the past five minutes and you still haven't figured out that that's what I'm wanting. I so hate my parents!!"  And she doesn't just confine her tantrums to home now either. For that reason I would like to take this opportunity to publicly thank the management of our local Westfield Mall in Glenfield for installing public naughty spots outside Whitcoulls, outside Staxs, in the menswear section of Farmers, in T&T, outside JK and all the many other places we haven't come across yet. Great work guys!!

Raising a toddler isn't easy especially when they are going through a declaration of independence phase, but I get through by trying to remember two things. Firstly we're not the only parents to have ever raised a child and by many comparisons ours is one of the better behaved ones out there. And secondly I remind myself of what John Cowan from Parents Inc said at a fathers seminar I attended last year which went something like - "if there's no blood and no fire, then what ever the problem is, it's not that serious".

And if none of that works, then there's always this:  youtube - tantrum



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