TTC after miscarriage/loss
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Category: Planning Pregnancy (trying for baby)
Forum Name: Planning Pregnancy (trying for baby)
Forum Description: Trying to get pregnant? Going through fertility treatment? Just planning your first or second child? There are many people out there in the same boat to help and listen and share with
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Printed Date: 27 April 2024 at 11:40am
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Topic: TTC after miscarriage/loss
Posted By: redtulip
Subject: TTC after miscarriage/loss
Date Posted: 24 June 2013 at 8:22am
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Hi ladies, Have started this thread as a place to come for those of us that have experienced miscarriages/stillbirth and are carrying on the journey to ttc our huggable babies. If you have suggestions, advice, questions or would just like some support I'm sure this will become a open, positive and comforting place to come.Know that you're not alone as there seem to be lots of us floating around the forum who have similar experiences and are here to help. As a brief intro, I'm turning 40 next month and have been ttc with dh for 2.5 years. I have had 4 missed m/c's during that time. After our 3rd m/c we had lots of tests done and an ultrasound but no cause has been found. Tried progesterone suppositories during 4th pregnancy but unfortunately mc'd due to Trisomy 16 so no chance any treatment would have helped. I'm currently doing acupuncture weekly and have been doing a herbal detox for the past 3-4 weeks. Acupuncturist thinks I might have problems with my thyroid or adrenals so working on those. I've been wondering for a while if I might have a thin uterine lining as my af is very light and short. So acupuncture will hopefully help with this and I'm trying to look up what else I might be able to do to help. Sorry - did turn into a bit of a novel - feel free to join in  -------------  5 wee Angels - Always in our hearts - Aug '11, Feb '12, Aug '12, Feb '13, Aug '13
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Replies:
Posted By: tan73
Date Posted: 24 June 2013 at 3:11pm
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Thanks Redtulip, great idea. I hadn't even realised there wasn't a thread like this! Hehe. I'm 39, turning 40 next month, eeek! DH is 30. We have been TTC #1 for a year. I have had 2 missed m/c. Have been with FA since the second m/c due to my age. I have low progesterone issues and short, light AF's, which I suspect is thin lining. Plan of action atm is to try for a few months and go on progesterone once I get a BFP. Failing a BFP, I will go on Clomid. I am unsure about whether I want to do this as I have heard it can cause thin lining. Will find out more about this. Dh and I have already decided we don't want to go further with IVF or anything as we have found TTC stressfyl enough, due to other issues, so unless it happens naturally, possibly with a bit of drug treatment, then it's not going to happen for us. I am preparing myself for this possibility now, just in case. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  2 Angels - Aug '12 & Mar '13 Always in our hearts. |
Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 24 June 2013 at 4:01pm
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Yay! Thanks Tulip for starting this up. It's just the thread I've been looking for! Im 33 years old and have only been TTC #1 since Feb this year. We had a big surprise after getting a BFP one month after TTC but sadly needed a medically managed missed m/c at wk11 after finding no HB at wk 7. Who knows why?!?!?! I'm healthy, fit, no problems with my menstrual cycle, etc. So on we soldier... First question of the thread... when did your AF start after the m/c. It's only 22 days since my mc (and just under 2 weeks since my spotting stopped - though it was never heavy after I left the hospital). And I started spotting today with backache and crampy feeling? What the heck? Also noticed a big temp drop this morning. But my HCG's were still at 45 one week ago (and have been dropping at a steady rate). Maybe is this still part of the mc? |
Posted By: tan73
Date Posted: 24 June 2013 at 4:16pm
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Amerciangirl - from my experience, anything goes after m/c. After the first m/c I had bleeding for about 10 days. AF came 32 days later. I had no spotting in between or anything. After the second m/c, I had bleeding for about 7 - 10 days although sometimes I couldn't tell if it was spotting or bleeding really. AF arrived after 35 days but I had spotting after 23 days for 5 days. This cycle I have had spotting on and off that didn't stop until CD18. During that time I did have a small surgery to remove polyps and bled after for a day, then back to spotting. Not sure what's going on but I reckon after the first m/c it took me 3 months for my cycles to be completely normal again. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 2 Angels - Aug '12 & Mar '13 Always in our hearts. |
Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 24 June 2013 at 4:26pm
| Thanks, Tan. I feel like I'm getting AF, but it just doesn't make sense with dates and hcg levels. But your right - anything goes! I've learned in the last 3 months that everyone is so different and symptoms/sign can mean totally different things. My friend who's due on the day I was is still spotting and has been all along just like I was... but I miscarried and she didn't. Argh. I just want to be past this (as I'm sure all of you do to!) |
Posted By: tan73
Date Posted: 24 June 2013 at 4:41pm
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I definitely do! But if I have learned anything in all of this, the whole pregnancy bizzo is the one thing that we absolutely CANNOT control. None of it, not even what our bodies do, can be controlled and that sucks because we are so used to controlling different aspects of our lives. The best way I find to keep going is to celebrate my body and all the things it does right and try to be patient about the things still coming right. I think, by our bodies doing silly things, it also gives us time to really grieve and heal before launching back in again. That doesn't happen for everyone, some people get pg straight away. But in some ways, I am glad that hasn't happened to me. It's definitely a process that takes time for me. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 2 Angels - Aug '12 & Mar '13 Always in our hearts. |
Posted By: redtulip
Date Posted: 24 June 2013 at 6:47pm
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Hi guys, Great you're here! Always felt this thread had been missing - the m/c support thread can be very quiet and there hasn't really been an appropriate place to ask lots of questions without feeling like I'm tread-jacking lol! Have also been aware that as much as it's great to get m/c out in the open I don't want to worry or add stress to anyones journey while they're ttc - so many of us ttc and facing fertility issues I don't want to be a constant reminder of something else that can go wrong. As you've said Tan, we're so used to having control over different aspects of our lives, m/c can really leave you feeling helpless.So. I've felt really positive that surely our luck ttc has to swing our way sooner or later and that it's just a numbers game however strangely stacked. I've always wondered how the idea of a stork arriving with a baby came about... wouldn't that just fix it all lol!! Americangirl, totally agree that 'anything goes' seems to be what happens with our cycles after m/c. For me, I have aways had d&c's after my m/c's as emotionally I haven't been able to cope with the thought of waiting for it to happen naturally and the possibility of it not being complete. I've also chosen d&c last 2 times as the hospital are able to run a number of tests that can help to determine cause if they have our bean with them. After d&c I've only had 2 days of light bleeding and af has always started 5 weeks after the procedure. I've heard of ladies having all manner of af's after m/c tho. Like Tan I'm concerned my uterine lining doesn't become thick enough to support a healthy bean. Did a bit of googling today and there is so much contradictory info about Red Rasberry leaf tea and Vitex (if it's safe in first trimester) so going to ask my acupuncturist if she knows. Some totally safe things I learnt to help build your lining are: eating up to 5 brazil nuts per day and also eating pineapple core from 1 dpo to 5 dpo. Also, there is an acupressure point about 2 inches below your bellybutton. Apparently if you massage it in a circular motion for about 2 mins a day it can also stimulate your lining. So, sorry to ramble - but 3 totally harmless things that could make a difference. Saw pineapples on special just the other day so going to give it a try. Due to ov on Wednesday. Started our BD marathon yesterday so definately in the game this month. ------------- 5 wee Angels - Always in our hearts - Aug '11, Feb '12, Aug '12, Feb '13, Aug '13
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Posted By: tan73
Date Posted: 24 June 2013 at 6:59pm
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Good luck Redtulip! I need a bit of advice - not sure if this is the right thread though! I might post it on the Clomid thread too. So I got a call from FA. They said there is still absolutely NO action in the ov department for me - not even an indication that I am going to ov soon. Sigh. This has never happened to me before. I did temping for 4 cycles after my first m/c and seemed to ov every time according to temps. Anyway, they said I can go on Clomid straight away if I like. I would need to have monitoring (at another $290, thank you very much, and I would have a scan to check lining etc. I am really unsure as I believe this is the first time I haven't ov'd and with everything else that has gone on in the last few months, I can't blame it really (although the specialist reckons none of that should make a difference). I was looking at taking Vitex for a bit first, but the nurses said they had never heard of it and generally don't recommend chinese herbal remedies as they have not been proven to be very sound and there is not enough robust research. I am undecided between taking the damn drugs, giving Vitex a go, or just waiting a bit longer for my body to sort itself out - even if it's just to wait for AF to show and then start Clomid at the right time (usually CD3). Hmmm what to do? Do you get AF if you haven't ov'd? I have to laugh as I have been feeling unsettled and anxious that there isn't a plan in place to 'get on with it' and now there is and I am dithering! ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 2 Angels - Aug '12 & Mar '13 Always in our hearts. |
Posted By: babygiraffe
Date Posted: 24 June 2013 at 7:02pm
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Thanks RT, great thread for those of us that have lost little angels. I am 40, will be 41 at the end of the year. We started trying in Sept 09 and was lucky to fall pg pretty much straight away. Unfortunately we lost 3 pregnancies in a row - 2 natural and one D&C. It was the hardest thing I've been through and it was a really low time in my life. I ended up seeing a specialist and they couldn't really tell me why, it was just one of those things and eventually I'd get the recipe right. Although they did pick up on my thyroid levels not being high enough so now I take medication for that. And then sure enough we did fall pg and in Jan last year our little ray of sunshine was born - I never thought I'd get to be a Mum. She is my little miracle We started trying again as soon as my AF returned, it took us 7 months and I fell pg again but unfortunately that ended in m/c. It was twins as well - a real kick in the guts. I thought because I'd already carried a pregnancy to full term I was exempt from m/c. Not to be  I coped well though, I had a real live baby to worry about and she kept me busy and made me smile. We are back on the horse again and fair to say its taking longer than I'd hoped. I was convinced I was UTD this month, I felt so seedy yesterday but big temp drop today and spotting. Bummer. Thats my novel anyway  hugs to you all
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Posted By: redtulip
Date Posted: 24 June 2013 at 7:17pm
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Hi BG! Great to see you here Tans, sorry don't know anything about clomid but pretty sure af will come even if you haven't ov'd - my only reasoning is that you often hear of ladies that have had no idea that they haven't been ov'ing because their af comes (so they automatically thought ov had happened). I have a friend who swears by vitex (or chaste tree). Her and another friend were having trouble ttc and both had luck while taking it... BUT, after looking it up today I'm not sure I'd take it until you've spoken to someone about it. It might not be suitable for people who have recurrent/unexplained m/c. Hold out til Wed if you can - as I'm going to ask my acupuncturist at my appt. When would your af normally be due? ------------- 5 wee Angels - Always in our hearts - Aug '11, Feb '12, Aug '12, Feb '13, Aug '13
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Posted By: tan73
Date Posted: 24 June 2013 at 7:24pm
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Yeah I think I will wait a bit longer. I have just done some reading about AF after no ov and it all says you can have AF but it's not really AF - it's a shedding of built up lining. That might explain my light periods? I tell you, I could scream! I am sick of guessing and trying to work it all out! I am keen to do Vitex first but also I forgot to say the nurse said that if Vitex stimulates progesterone then that's not what we want right now, we want estrogen to make the eggy come out. Maybe I have been not always oving the whole time. It would explain the lack of symptoms I have been getting post ov. Oh well, I don't want to leave another novel, so I think I will wait for a bit and see if AF arrives. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 2 Angels - Aug '12 & Mar '13 Always in our hearts. |
Posted By: redtulip
Date Posted: 24 June 2013 at 7:33pm
Will def ask her at my appt on Wed and let you know. And yeah, you're right about the estrogen. Can understand the frustration, so confusing sometimes huh!  Even if it's not 'af' as such... surely a new cycle starts after the lining has shed tho right? Chin up my friend - your bfps prove you ov so it might just be your bod sorting itself for next cycle  ------------- 5 wee Angels - Always in our hearts - Aug '11, Feb '12, Aug '12, Feb '13, Aug '13
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Posted By: babygiraffe
Date Posted: 24 June 2013 at 8:30pm
| I ov every month as far as I aware, or as far as FF tells me I do! But my specialist has suggested clomid for me if I'm not UTD by August. I think I'll do it, I'm keen to get the next pregnancy under way sooner than later. I guess I'd have to do a monitored cycle so I can imagine DH will be cringing at the cost. I feel like I'm running a bit low on time though. Be interested to see what your accu lady says RT... |
Posted By: tan73
Date Posted: 24 June 2013 at 8:54pm
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I know what you mean BG! ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 2 Angels - Aug '12 & Mar '13 Always in our hearts. |
Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 24 June 2013 at 9:05pm
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Welcome BG! Well, I say that in a supportive way. It stinks to be in our positions, but hopefully this thread helps us stay positive and sane! Tan, I don't know much at all about clomid so I can't help you out much there. I know for sure that you can get AF without ovulating - I would say it's quite likely to have that happen after a m/c. I read in a few places that any bleeding or spotting 2-3 weeks after a m/c is most likely still due to the mc and not AF. Some places say you can only count AF if you had no bleeding/spotting for 2-3 solid weeks. That's why I'm a bit worried about my spotting and cramping right now. It seems too soon for AF so I'm wondering if it could be retained product  With regards to the herbal drinks, I'm a bit paranoid (and DH is a pharmacist)so we're not too keen on anything that isn't backed by heaps of medical research. Just best not to risk it in our opinion. I guess I just think that if something REALLY does all the stuff it's suppose to, then why aren't doctors recommending it and why isn't there more research to support it. I know I'm biased though because of DH and our circle of doctor friends. And to all of us, my doctor said to me today "you're body will know when it's ready, so just trust it and don't try to rush it!" |
Posted By: tan73
Date Posted: 24 June 2013 at 9:40pm
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Thanks Americangirl - great quote at the end. I do agree with that. Interesting about Vitex. It's interesting that the nurses at FA have never even heard of it. They do recommend accupuncture though, but not chinese medicine. Interesting about AF and spotting - I didn't know that. I have been spotting for about a month now. If your body is cramping and spotting from retained tissue, I think you would either keep bleeding and it will clear it out, or you'll start to feel worse and need to go get checked out. I hope it's just your body sorting itself out. Try not to worry. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 2 Angels - Aug '12 & Mar '13 Always in our hearts. |
Posted By: emsbet
Date Posted: 24 June 2013 at 9:52pm
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Thanks for starting this redtulip - great idea! I'm 31 and DH and I decided to start trying for our first this year. I ended up pregnant in the first month of trying, but miscarried when I was almost 12wks (embryo stopped growing at around 6wks). I had no idea - had all the pregnancy symptoms that whole time (morning sickness etc), then started spotting when I was 2 days away from 12wks. My sister had bleeding early in her first pregnancy (everything turned out fine) so I wasn't too worried ... I must say, I never thought about the possibility of miscarriage - was only worried that I might have trouble getting UPD! We'll wait a couple of months before TTC again (allow a bit of time to "clear out"). Americangirl - my 1st AF after the mc came about 3&1/2 weeks after the last of the mc bleeding (which all up, including spotting before & after everything came out, lasted about 2&1/2 weeks). The mc was natural (no intervention). That AF lasted only about 3 days - I was expecting more, but oh well. That was end of May - don't know when I should be expecting my next AF! It's great to have a forum like this to discuss this sort of thing - it's something I haven't really talked about with anyone. I don't want people to know (maybe it's just that I don't want people to know I'm trying for a baby), but miscarriage seems to be something that isn't really openly discussed (in person anyway), which is odd seeing how often it happens! |
Posted By: vineyardhoney
Date Posted: 24 June 2013 at 11:01pm
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hi everyone, might jump in here too! I'm 28, so is DH, been TTC since June 2012, fell pregnant on our 3rd cycle, at a really odd time - I must have been between day 5 and 10 when I ovulated, as I got my first BFP with a clearblue digital on CD17. Long drawn out process from there, monitored by early pregnancy clinic as I had a suspected ectopic and slow rising HCG. 3 weeks after my BFP my HCG started to drop naturally, so I didn't need medical management or surgery and it was another 5 weeks before my hormone levels dropped away. I just thought I would pass on this interesting bit of info. Some of you know that I am seeing a traditional chinese medicine practitioner and acupuncturist. they talk a lot about blood flow, colour of your period. there is a theory that if you are spotting a lot, or brown, thick, or clotted blood that stops/starts a fair bit during your period, that there is a sign that "old blood" has not cleared out of your system. Looking back, my cycle shows this definitely since my M/C. My first AF after 2 sessions of acupuncture was completely different. Take what you want from this, but for me I have noticed a massive difference. fingers are firmly crossed that I don't get AF in the next 2 days and instead get a BFP on wednesday! ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: redtulip
Date Posted: 25 June 2013 at 6:48am
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Hi emsbet... glad you found us - you can definately feel safe to ask/share as much as you like here OOOOH Vine, Wednesday as in tomorrow Wednesday lol??!!! FX very tightly for you! ------------- 5 wee Angels - Always in our hearts - Aug '11, Feb '12, Aug '12, Feb '13, Aug '13
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Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 25 June 2013 at 7:11am
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Welcome Ems and Vineyard! Sorry for your loss, but it's good to have you here to share with us. Vineyard, that's interesting about the old blood and the acupuncturist. Well...I think AF came this morning. It's what I'm hoping anyway, rather than retained product of an infection. 22 day after my mc and only 12 days of no spotting/bleeding in between. Weird! I wouldn't think it was so strange except that my HCG was 45 only 1 week ago - a few day LP??? I did have a big temp drop to coincide with it all. Good luck Vine for the BFP!!!! |
Posted By: monkeys
Date Posted: 25 June 2013 at 9:26am
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I fall into this category too - I have had 3 MC's, with no reason, and have fertility issues. We are trying chinese herbs and acupuncture this time, as we have decided that the emotional and physical toll of mc is too much, so this is the last chance for us so throwing everything at it. So currently in our last month of preperation through the acupuncture man before being able to try next month. -------------  3 little Angels July 10, May 11, Apr 13
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Posted By: epictraveller
Date Posted: 25 June 2013 at 10:19am
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Oh monkeys, I hope so badly that this works for you! I'm in this category too, finally got UTD on my first cycle of clomid after 16 months of TTC but had a missed miscarriage - absolute hell but I'm sure I don't need to tell you ladies that. Someone mentioned how little miscarriage is talked about and that's something I have definitely noticed - I've told all my closest friends (none of whom even knew I was pregnant) and after I did, it turned out two of them had had miscarriages in the last six months. One was my bestie, she hadn't told me as she knew I was TTC and she lives in the UK so it was easier for her to hide it from me). We now talk about our babies being together somewhere and when she's back over (she'll be here for my due date, hers was last week) we're going to do something to honour them. The other was my cousin's wife and she overheard my DH and my friend and worked it out, we had a big talk afterwards. The point of all this is that it is horrific how prevalent miscarriages are but how little they are talked about, at least among women our age. I'm not necessarily advocating telling parents etc (we haven't) but I think more awareness in women of our age is important so that there's a bit more support for people that do go through it and awareness that it can happen. That said, its not for everyone and I understand that. Whew! Gawd I hope we all get our sticky BFP's soon. ------------- #1 Angel babies April 2013, Nov 2013 IVF #1 Nov 2013-CP IVF #2 May 2014-BFN IVF #3 Feb 2015-BFN DS Jun 2015-BFN Oct 16 -Natural BFP! TTC #2 |
Posted By: monkeys
Date Posted: 25 June 2013 at 3:10pm
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We have been really open with everyone about our struggles, if nothing else it at least stops the questions of when you are going to have kids, you are right though with us being open it means others open up and share what they have been through as well ------------- 3 little Angels July 10, May 11, Apr 13
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Posted By: avidkeo
Date Posted: 25 June 2013 at 4:20pm
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Hey ladies. This was our first, and we were lucky enough to conceive in our 2nd month of trying and as some of you will know, I am currently going through a miscarriage. That's a very hard sentence to write. So much information about TTC and pregnancy, but so little about miscarriage! its funny, but you never think about the fact it lasts a week (if your lucky), you often think of miscarriage as happening in an instant, you wake up and your baby is gone, but its definitely not the case. Along with the sorrow and pain, I have to admit to eating some humble pie. I am ashamed to admit that before getting pregnant I could never understand people getting so upset as loosing a baby so soon e.g. 6 weeks, and have voiced this opinion. What an naive and insensitive idiot I was! However now that I am going through it, I completely understand that it is something you cannot understand until you a) get pregnant, and b) go through a miscarriage. I am amazed at how quickly you attach to the baby you are carrying, right from the day I got my BFP I was a mum, and now I feel like that has been ripped away from me. It doesn't matter that I never held my child, I have lost my first child, and it will always be my first. I spent yesterday "sucking it up" and "punching through", I stayed at work, even though I was bleeding, because "It wasnt anything major". It wasnt until I was at work today and a friend who only just found out gave me some home truths, that I hadn't wanted to admit but already felt, that I was able to let go and start mourning our loss. These truths were that I was carrying a child, it wasnt just a bundle of cells, and that I shouldnt bottle it up, I should let it out. When I spend about an hour crying, and almost cried in front of a patient, I finally admitted to myself I need time to grieve. Fortunately I have an amazing boss who agreed and who basically sent me home. I have now given myself permission to feel the loss, isnt it amazing that we need to give ourselves permission! everyone around me was telling me it was fine to grieve and cry, but I didnt want to!I felt like I had to be strong. the reactions from people have been mixed, those who know. The two best reactions I had were: One lady just had a couple of tears with me, she did hug me, but not uncomfortably, and other than that didnt say much. That really got me. The other was from a new friend who didnt find out till this morning, but has been an incredible rock for me. She said "why didnt you tell me" which from her was the best thing she could have said, and then just hugged me like my mum would. that was it, and that was exactly what I needed. Im sorry if this went on a bit, I am a talker, and talk to get through things. DH has been amazing, just listening when I needed to talk and leaving me alone to figure it out. I know I will be fine, and that is empowering. I hope by this novel I havent bought up too many painful things for others. I think I am still in an element of shock. Thank you for being here and for listening. |
Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 25 June 2013 at 5:03pm
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I'm so sorry about your loss Avid. The first few days are the worst, but don't try to hide your feelings. Let yourself be angry, jealous, sad, confused. Don't try to carry on with life as normal - take time off of work so you can let yourself deal with it properly. If you don't, it'll rear it's ugly head later when you least expect it. I don't understand why we're expected to be quiet about this. I've been very open (maybe too much!) but it's because I think we shouldn't be hiding such traumatic things like this. We need friends, support and understanding; we shouldn't just soldier on and put it behind us. You're right, you were a mum the minute that BFP appeared. So let yourself grieve for the loss of that little angel and all the hope that came along with it. We're all here for you, so never hesitate to ask for support. I'm only 3 weeks past my mc so things are very raw still, but they're getting better. I've thrown myself into running again to distract me and am becoming slightly obsessed with understanding the whole conception thing (BBT, hormones, other people's experiences). Do what you gotta do to find peace and look ahead to the future. And ask any questions you need to!!! |
Posted By: emsbet
Date Posted: 25 June 2013 at 6:44pm
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I'm really sorry for your loss avidkeo. I know what you mean about information - I did a lot of googling etc as I really had no idea what was going on/what to expect. Please do ask questions if you want to. Had a bit of a "moment" today - someone I work with is expecting a grandchild, which is due about the same time I would have been due, and she was in the office (which I share with my heavily pregnant workmate ... ) telling us all about the 20wk scan. Listening to her talk about it actually made me quite sad, as it made me think about the fact that I would have had that scan now too ... I had to leave the room (ended up in the bathroom with a few tears)! I've coped fine with all the comments my workmate gets about her bump etc, so I don't really know what set me off! Don't get me wrong - I'm happy for her about her grandchild, but I just couldn't keep listening. I just have to remember that when the time is right, it'll happen. |
Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 25 June 2013 at 6:59pm
| I had much the same moment today, Ems. I guess it's just part of the process we go through; things are pretty raw for us. And all these little milestones will remind of us where we stopped. But keep thinking about the future. |
Posted By: avidkeo
Date Posted: 25 June 2013 at 7:30pm
| ahhhh, trying to have a normal adult conversation with my sister in law - who granted only just now found out that we are miscarrying, but everything she talks about comes back to the loss!!!!!!!!! So I just said im all talked out about the loss and just want to talk normal stuff. wonder if she will take the hint! |
Posted By: tan73
Date Posted: 25 June 2013 at 7:33pm
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Welcome Monkeys, Ems and Avid. I am sorry you are all here but it is nice to have a place to share together. Avid, I cried reading your post. It brought back sooo many memories. What I wanted to tell you was that what your are feeling is very normal and I am so so glad that you are now taking time to grieve. How wonderful to have the reactions from the people you have told. I read in a SANDS brochure that it takes 6 months to fully heal from a m/c. And I must say I do think that is pretty close to being right. I am the same as Monkeys too. I blab to everyone. I think when I lost my first baby, I wanted to honour it by letting everyone know and I also hated people not knowing that things were not good with me. I hate false small talk. It's different the second time around. You don't get the same sympathy as you do with the first. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 2 Angels - Aug '12 & Mar '13 Always in our hearts. |
Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 25 June 2013 at 8:46pm
| I thought AF was here this morning, but I just got the results of my HCG from Monday... 14. Don't think it's really AF. I had a bout of major cramping this avo for 30 min. Almost took myself into the hospital as it felt like it did when I was having my medically managed mc - could barely stand or talk. But then it just stopped suddenly. Whew. Not a fun 30 minutes! I thought I'd be bleeding heavily but that stopped around the same time. Anybody have bleeding like this after (1-2wks) the mc bleeding stopped? I tried looking it up online but found I was just chasing my tail. Do you think it could be retained product or just my body going nuts? |
Posted By: tan73
Date Posted: 25 June 2013 at 9:03pm
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I haven't had this sorry (at least I can't remember!). I did have spotting after 2nd m/c but my body is still not behaving itself now. IMO if you're really worried, go back to the doctor. It is not unusual to have retained tissue so I would get it checked out if it doesn't feel right. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 2 Angels - Aug '12 & Mar '13 Always in our hearts. |
Posted By: Charly28
Date Posted: 25 June 2013 at 11:26pm
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Avid, everything you said I can relate to completely. And like Tan said, what you feel is totally normal. When I fell pg in Dec '12 we actually were not even actively trying... We weren't actively preventing though either... It was my first month off the pill in 10 years! But the day I found out I was pg my world changed and from that moment on everything I did was with my babys best interest in mind! I was a mum instantly from day 1... Even in my shocked state!! Lol. I embraced it and was ready, was so happy... Then... To have it ripped away 19 weeks later...... Devastating! It's been 2 months since my loss and I still have my 'moments'! Whether you are a mum for a day, a week, a trimester or more... The feelings are the same... Empty, heartbroken, depressed, disappointed, angry (mainly angry at the world, for all the people who don't want their babies yet have a perfectly healthy baby/pregnancy, not that I'm anti abortion or anything) it's a roller coaster of emotion! I don't think I've ever cried like I did when I experienced my loss... At least not since I was a child... (One of though 'real' cries where you don't hold back, a cry from the absolute pit of your stomach) But I truly believe what americangirl said, the first days are the worst, I think back to those days for me, they were pretty dark ... It does get so much easier though... But, if you want to cry a year from now, let it out! And dont feel like you can't! I personally don't think I will ever "get over" my loss... But, what warms my heart is that I will get my BFP one day soon, like all of us here will, and when we meet our babies after those 9 months, we won't be able to fatham not having that exact baby in our life! And everything that happened will have happened so THAT baby could be bought into the world. Everything happens for a reason I hope someone else can take some comfort in believing that too! My mum miscarried right before getting pg with my sister, and I can't imagine anyone in my sisters place! ------------- April 2013, December 2013 http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/43bc43" rel="nofollow - My Ovulation Chart |
Posted By: tan73
Date Posted: 26 June 2013 at 8:10am
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I agreee, you will never 'get over' losing your babies. It's kind of like it just gets added to your life and, while it does get easier to take a step each day, it certainly never leaves you. I don't want it to either. My babies will be on my heart for life. There are moments now where I think about my first baby and wonder what it would look like, how old it would be. Not a day goes by where I don't think about my babies and where I would be now with them. BUT I am also grateful for the life I have. Losing my first baby spurred me to get on with life and try new things, and add some hobbies to my life, things to look forward to. I didn't really have any hobbies or things that I was looking forward to before then. It was like I had put everything on hold. Now, if there is something I want to try, I do it. I have found doing that has made it so much easier to carry on, even though I miss my babies. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 2 Angels - Aug '12 & Mar '13 Always in our hearts. |
Posted By: avidkeo
Date Posted: 26 June 2013 at 9:02am
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Morning everyone. Physically feeling like crap, cramping and all that. Funny cause its not quite as bad as my normal period, but its lasting much longer. Other than that the bleeding seems to have slowed a bit. Im thinking I may be very very lucky and will have an "easy" one (haha easy, yeah right!) emotionally, well I think im feeling a little numb. Im not sure how I am feeling really. A little weepy but not like yesterday. I am one of those hateful positive people who typically bounce back quickly, and even with all the sadness I am still seeing the funny side of things. e.g. my DH broke the news of the miscarriage to his sister by saying "we get to try again for a baby". naturally she was really confused until he confirmed we had lost it. I had to laugh a the fact he is just looking at we get to try again rather than we lost our first. I understand this is a male thing - my friend explained that to me yesterday - but I actually found that funny rather than sad! DH reaction to it has been a bit like that. When we were trying, well I was trying, he was a little gun shy. At OV time he got performance anxiety and wasnt happy. I finally managed to get through to him that we are only actually fertile for a few days of the month, and he had finally decided to give things a proper go (BD at ov time) and like the next day I found out I was preg. At that moment he was so happy, and on reflection he admitted that now he knows he really does want the baby - I don't think he was so sure before. So in his eyes, yes its sad and I think he has some understanding what Im going through, He is just excited to have another chance and to try properly this time!!! Males!!!! |
Posted By: redtulip
Date Posted: 26 June 2013 at 1:33pm
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Hi everyone, Nice to see there are more of us here to support each other. Avid - good to hear from you today. Totally normal to be feeling numb right now - such a lot for you to take in both physically and emotionally. Can't add much more than what has already been said except that it's nice to hear you and dh are talking about everything - m/c can put so much strain on relationships if you're not aware of how your partner is coping/feeling. Hope you're getting some rest despite feeling yuck. x Tans, just got back from acupuncture and I asked about vitex. She had heard of it and said it was commonly used but more by naturopaths. She said she wouldn't recommend trying anything like it without talking to a naturopath or having it prescribed. Sorry - not much more help than that. But I did ask her if she knew of a good acupuncturist in Chch. She didn't but said best thing to do was look up www.acupuncture.org.nz to search fro someone near you - they are all registered and their qualifications will have been checked before they can be listed. Some will have websites that list what they specialise in - otherwise when you ring ask if they specialise in fertility acupuncture. I've been charting since I've seen her and my temps are very low. She wondered if I had thyroid probs but I've had bloods done and came back normal. My temp pre ov is only around 35.5 - 35.7. So she has said it's a pretty clear sign of what's going wrong - I'm too cold! Shes been working on bloodflow and making sure I ov but we are going to start trying kidney herbs to raise temp. She told me that if I were to get pregnant right now it would probably end in m/c again! Hmmm, thanks for the warning before now! But I think this cycle has been out of whack anyway. Looking at my chart (I just fill out a paper chart she gives me) I ov'd on Sunday (CD11) but don't usually ov till CD14 (today) so who knows. I'm totally entrusting her knowledge and experience - I don't want to ponder on it too much myself as I find it consumes me, thats why I don't bother using FF... I think I'd get obsessive. Anyone else here have low temps? Or what sort of range are yours normally? (See - I feel the obsession starting already LOL!!!!) ------------- 5 wee Angels - Always in our hearts - Aug '11, Feb '12, Aug '12, Feb '13, Aug '13
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Posted By: babygiraffe
Date Posted: 26 June 2013 at 2:31pm
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Crap I just typed a long post and then lost it. ARRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!! Anyway what I was saying was that your temps do look quite low RT so I'm glad your accu lady might be able to sort that for you. Mine are up around 36.1 - 36.4 before ov. For those that are struggling with recent losses, I'm just so sorry you have to go through this and I hope you are doing ok today. Its a long hard road but know it does get better. Be kind to yourselves and take the time you need. No luck for us last month, back to CD2 for me today. And like a complete knob I had convinced myself I was UTD. Had been feeling seedy for a few days and let myself get excited.....even though DH kept telling me not to. So of course when AF turned up right on schedule I felt really bummed. Never mind, will have a good crack this month and hopefully we have some luck 
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Posted By: redtulip
Date Posted: 26 June 2013 at 3:09pm
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...yeah, thought so BG, I must be part reptilian! Acupuncturist has been taking her temps for months (shes just into temping for her own wellbeing - not ttc) and said her normal temp is about 36.1+. So if anything, at least I feel like I'm getting some help - haven't ever had RPL clinic ask much about af let alone temps so here's hoping she's on to something. You're not a knob for letting yourself get excited - sometimes out bods send us signals that are so easy to read as preg symptoms - know how it feels when you're pretty certain then af comes. If you're anything like me you'll enjoy a wine or 2 (with a few brazil nuts lol!)... or do something else to spoil yourself. Hope this next cycle is yours! On the drinks note, spoke to accu lady about the odd drink and she said the odd coffe or wine is fine as long as it's a treat - not something you do regularly. What thoughts do you ladies have on this? And is decaf ok to drink? Just interested in what others think. ------------- 5 wee Angels - Always in our hearts - Aug '11, Feb '12, Aug '12, Feb '13, Aug '13
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Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 26 June 2013 at 4:16pm
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I heard one cup of coffee a day was ok, but not much more. I'd rather just keep clear of the wine. There's no doubt that alcohol will go through the baby's system as well, and as a chemistry teacher, I know that there's lots of things it can react with (meaning it can disrupt what's supposed to be going right!). Caffeine still goes through the baby, but I don't think it really disrupts the processes of development. I think too much of it cause the female's body to do funny things which can lead to miscarriage. I've only just started keeping track of my temps (yes, very addicting) and mine have been within a range of 36.3 and 36.6 (once at 4am it was below 36 but that's not the normal time I take my temps). I'm not sure if I ovulated or not or what my pre-ov temp is so I can't help you much with that. I was just checked in Dec for a thyroid problem (under active) and one of the signs of that is a low body temp... and an under active thryroid DEFINITELY leads to issues in getting UTD. My doc talked to me about that when I was getting it checked out. I hope I don't spot on and off for months!!! No more cramping like the fricken contractions from yesterday, but I'm still spotting a bit. AF or retained product????? The million dollar question of the day. |
Posted By: babygiraffe
Date Posted: 26 June 2013 at 6:38pm
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Ah RT, I don't know about the whole not drinking wine/coffee thing. My specialist told me that women have been drinking alcohol for donkeys years and still manage to get UTD. He kind of shrugged it off a bit. I know its not good, it can interfere with implantation and probably not very good for my old eggies. But damn it, I enjoy it and I feel relaxed and normal when I have a wine on a Friday night! I've gone through stages of not drinking any wine during TTC but all it does is p*ss me off every month I get AF. I don't drink much coffee, maybe one or two instant coffee's every 2-3 days. I usually drink a malt drink or decaf. So I'm trying hard not to drink wine, just a few around when AF arrives. To be honest our budget doesn't really cover much wine these days so the problem has kind of sorted itself. Now I feel like a wine.....
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Posted By: emsbet
Date Posted: 26 June 2013 at 6:49pm
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I have one coffee a day - I switched to hot chocs when I found out I was UTD last time but it's just not the same! I really should try & stop again so that I'm not having caffeine when TTC again. I would be curious to know if decaff would be ok. Americangirl - it might be worth seeing a dr to make sure everything is ok (I only had constant bleeding so can't really compare). My dr gave me a referral for a scan to check that I didn't have retained product, though I waited for a bit before booking. I wish I had known that if you don't have the scan within 2wks of the mc, it costs $245! That's what they quoted me anyway - I would have looked at doing it earlier then! Avid - i hope you're feeling ok. You mentioned about your bleeding being like a period? I had that too to start with (& thought it was just like a normal period so easier than I was expecting!). If you have any questions on what to expect to happen as part of the mc, let me know. I didn't know what to expect at the time, and wish i had been given information so i could be "prepared". Though i know not all miscarriages would be the same. |
Posted By: monkeys
Date Posted: 27 June 2013 at 9:10am
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I'm not having coffee or alcohol - although I know that may be crazy as I have been TTC for so long ------------- 3 little Angels July 10, May 11, Apr 13
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Posted By: avidkeo
Date Posted: 27 June 2013 at 9:53am
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Emsbet, thank you. Yeah so far apart from extra clots and more cramps, its been just like a period, spotting for 2 days, one day light, one day full on, then a couple of days lighter, slowly peetering off. If it continues like this I expect I wont bleed overnight tonight, have just a little tomorrow and then all over by saturday. However I dont know what to expect at all. All the Dr said was that the bleeding is considered normal if it last up to 2 weeks, any more than that they will investigate. I will be having my scan tomorrow afternoon, so within a week of starting. What can you tell me because other than the above I have absoloutly no idea. The cramping has eased off, still there but not like tuesday at all. |
Posted By: emsbet
Date Posted: 27 June 2013 at 11:33am
| Avid, I started off with spotting (started on a Thursday, had a scan on Friday which determined I was miscarrying), and continued like a normal period (which for me, is quite light). Then the following Wednesday night I had quite a lot of bleeding and clots, then it slowed down again (so didn't have much the next day). Then I woke up in the middle of the night after with quite bad cramps, more bleeding, and a sac came out (I assume that's what it was anyway! It was "in tact" and must've had fluid in it). Then the bleeding slowed down again, so had bleeding then spotting over the following days until it stopped completely. That's what happened to me anyway. It's good that you've got a scan book - at least they'll be able to check how things have progressed. |
Posted By: kelzie_rose
Date Posted: 27 June 2013 at 11:39am
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This is such an important thread to have. I had three miscarriages (one d&c and two natural) before getting pregnant with my daughter. I was on progesterone for the first half of the pregnancy and I do believe that that's why I didn't miscarry her. Hold onto your hope that it will happen. Much love x -------------  Started TTC Apr 2008 With PCOS and a bicornuate uterus Our angel babies Jan 2010 <3 Oct 2010 <3 Apr 2011 <3 |
Posted By: Nellennium
Date Posted: 27 June 2013 at 1:29pm
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I think miscarriages can be so different because it depends on how your body deals with it. Some people for example, their bodies break down the product (such a clinical term, but I'm used to it now) and others have to pass everything whole. For me I had a missed miscarriage. The mucus plug came out, but I don't remember what day that was, I was sort of in denial. A week? later I got brown spotting Mon - Tues, and a gush of brown water on a Wed. Went to the Hospital, while I was there I had a huge gush of red water - it went everywhere. Then everything stopped. Friday I had a scan showing everything still inside and stopped at 8 weeks 4 days. Then I took those pills to get everything going again. The first night was horrific with lots of bleeding and clots. Passing the clots were like labour, I could feel everything passing through my cervix. My husband was afraid the neighbours would think he was murdering me as I was screaming so much. (sorry if that's a bit too much info for some). So we went back to the hospital and I had 4-5? doses of morphine before the pain subsided and the bleeding stopped. Bleed heavily over the next few days, the placenta came out on a Tues, it was huge! I wasn't expecting that (over 10cm long and about 5cm thick), my cervix must of been open then because I honestly didn't feel it pass through, just went to the loo and omg there it was! Bleeding settled down after that but continued for another 6 days. Then I was spotting for another 20 days - turns out I still had product in me hence the non stop bleeding - but it was only 8mm big on the next scan I had. Amazing how something so small can caus so much more bleeding. Then got my first AF and it was HEAVY (had one accident at home on the couch and almost another 3 at work)! That was 8 days plus another 3 spotting. Then my cycle went back to 'normal'. Don't know what happened to the pregnancy sac. I assume my body broke it down because it did not come out whole or recognisable. -------------  4xMC, 3xMMC http://nellennium.blogspot.co.nz" rel="nofollow - Blog: Nellennium Ramblings |
Posted By: avidkeo
Date Posted: 27 June 2013 at 2:00pm
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Oh Nell that is a horrible experience to have to go through! and wow you are right, it is so different for everyone. I am really hoping that because its so early for me - only 6w5d before it started - that hopefully this will be it, though Nell your story means ill be a bit more careful!!!! I think that mine probably stopped growing about about 5 weeks, because my HCG on monday was only 540, meaning that its well on its way down. |
Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 27 June 2013 at 3:31pm
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Nell, that sounds awful :-( Thanks for sharing it with us though. Avid, I had a missed miscarriage, so mine was medically managed about 3weeks after the heartbeat stopped. I took the meds in the hospital and started cramping/bleeding within 20 minutes. I had to take more meds every 3 hours and after 6 hours, the pain was so intense that I had to use morphine. I passed everything about 8 hours after it started, but didn't feel any pain in passing it (bar the cramping). Once I passed the tissue (grayish rather than red/black) I immediately started feeling better - no more nauseousness, had an appetite, etc. The next day I had very light, period like bleeding, then my spotting went on for about another week or 10 days. When I stopped spotting, my hcg's were about 70. I had some MAJOR cramping and bleeding, much like in the hospital, a few days ago (3.5 weeks after the mc) but I'm not sure if it was AF or the end of the mc. I also go awful headaches when my progesterone dropped after the mc, and then I got them again this week when I had all the cramping. The headaches were actually the worst bit for me. My body rebounded really quickly physically. I ran 5km two days later (after not running for months) and had no other lingering symptoms. My last blood test, 3 weeks after the mc, was 15 for the HCG. One week after the mc, my hcg was 250, the next week it was 45 and this week 15 - it goes slowly at the end. Whew... hope that gives you a bit of insight. Kelzie, sorry for your losses. how early on were your mc's? Did you have missed miscarriages? Were there any other indicators of the low progeserterone? |
Posted By: Nellennium
Date Posted: 27 June 2013 at 3:47pm
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What city or country did you have your medically managed miscarriage americangirl? They wouldn't admit me for mine and said go home (with 4 different pottles of pills with various instructions) and just call the ambulance if it gets bad (which it did and we did). But the hospital was pretty much useless and under staffed. Lower Hutt Hospital NZ, do NOT recommend. ------------- 4xMC, 3xMMC http://nellennium.blogspot.co.nz" rel="nofollow - Blog: Nellennium Ramblings |
Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 27 June 2013 at 3:55pm
| Whangarei in the northland. They were awesome! I had my own room and bathroom on the surgical ward, the ward was only half full, and the nurses were great. Not that I EVER want to do it again, but I would hope for the same in a similar situation. The nurses (poor ladies!) weighed every clot, pad and all the tissue and kept an eye on me all the time. I couldn't have done it alone at home! The morphine IV helped, too. They were so sympathetic and even wanted me and DH to stay the night though everything was fine by that point. I really appreciated having a doctor constantly checking on me, too. Made the whole experience slightly less traumatic. I can't believe they wouldn't admit you!?!?!?! Poor thing. They wouldn't even give me the first med (36 hours before) to take home, I had to take it in front of them. |
Posted By: Nellennium
Date Posted: 27 June 2013 at 3:58pm
Wow. Now that's the kind of support you really need! It's also the kind of support I see in forums from other countries. I had assumed NZ was just backwards, but now I see it's just my local hospital!  ------------- 4xMC, 3xMMC http://nellennium.blogspot.co.nz" rel="nofollow - Blog: Nellennium Ramblings |
Posted By: avidkeo
Date Posted: 27 June 2013 at 4:57pm
| Nell, I have worked at Lower hutt hospital, and now work for a hospital in the far north, yes its hutt hospital. they are way understaffed, but to be fair to them, the government has cut their budget so much they cannot afford more staff. |
Posted By: Nellennium
Date Posted: 27 June 2013 at 6:55pm
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Yeah I don't blame the actual staff Avid, I was just angry at the whole situation. I needed a scan on two occasions in there and they couldn't give me one because they had no one who knew how to work the machine and when I was in the emergency bit for the second time the only staff member who could access me was a male gynecologist which I just couldn't deal with and he said it's safe to assume you've passed all the product you can go home (and I hadn't, that didn't happen until 4 days later). Whoops rambling! Anyway, I know it's not their fault but I won't be going back there. ------------- 4xMC, 3xMMC http://nellennium.blogspot.co.nz" rel="nofollow - Blog: Nellennium Ramblings |
Posted By: tan73
Date Posted: 27 June 2013 at 8:18pm
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Nell - that's terrible! It is definitely to do with that hospital. My two experiences were the same as americangirl - at Christchurch Women's. I am so appreciative we live in a country that treats miscarriages with such respect and sincerity. I have heard of such horrible stories in the UK and USA. I have made a plan for the next couple of months. I am going to see a naturopath tomorrow to start taking vitex in liquid form. I have also booked in with an acupuncturist. FA not only recommends acupuncture, but also, I found out today that a close colleague of mine got pregnant after getting acupuncture. The success rate in women getting pregnant from acupuncture is 17 out of 20! Wow! So I am definitely giving it a go. I am hoping that with the vitex preparing my body and the acupuncture, we will have a sticky baby this time. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 2 Angels - Aug '12 & Mar '13 Always in our hearts. |
Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 27 June 2013 at 8:37pm
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Good luck with the acupuncture and the vitrex, Tan! Maybe it'll be the secret weapon for you :-) Do you know what the acupuncture is meant to help with? Ovulation? Implantation? I've only just heard of women use it when TTC. When are you meant to go? Before ovulation? Months ahead of time? One more question... anyone know much about progesterone suppositories in pregnancy? My friend had a few mc then started taking those and had two kids! I asked my doc about them when I started spotting early in my pregnancy, but she said they don't really do anything?!?!?! Huh? It's so common in the states but here they say there isn't enough research to show that it prevents mc - they say the low progesterone is a consequence of not a cause of mc. |
Posted By: redtulip
Date Posted: 27 June 2013 at 8:49pm
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Thanks for sharing such a positive experience kelzie_rose, thanks for the well wishes too. Tans, great to hear about your appointments - would be really interested to hear what the naturopath tells you about the vitex, I'm quite intrigued seeing as I've been told differing things. That's an amazing acupuncture statistic too. Monkeys - that doesn't sound crazy at all... this journey can be so hard and after multiple m/c's and so few answers I find I'm just doing whatever feels best/comfortable for myself - it's really all I can do. I'm just really curious as to what others in the same situation do, just gives me insight. I do have the odd wine before ov and I also have the odd coffee. I feel ok with that but I can totally understand why others would chose not to.. wish I had your willpower! ------------- 5 wee Angels - Always in our hearts - Aug '11, Feb '12, Aug '12, Feb '13, Aug '13
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Posted By: redtulip
Date Posted: 27 June 2013 at 9:26pm
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Americangirl, I go to a fertility acupuncturist once a week (so during my whole cycle). Acupuncture sessions are specific to you - on my first visit I told her about my history. I also temp and take my chart in to her to check every session. By checking my chart, my pulse, looking at my tongue and asking me how I'm feeling she is able to tell which acupressure points she needs to work on. For example, she may work on blood flow to uterus, making sure you ovulate, hormone levels, your bbt among other things. She also prescribes herbs to help as well. It's best to go before ttc so they are able to get your body ready before you get utd. But you can start at any point. As for progesterone suppositories - I used them with my last pregnancy but unfortunately tests showed our bean had Trisomy 16 so there is no way it would have helped in that situation. I had it prescribed by the Recurrent Pregnancy Loss clinic as soon as I got my bfp and was supposed to take it for the first trimester. If you were showing signs of threatened m/c it wouldn't have stopped it - that might be what your GP meant? I'm not sure if GP's prescribe it as I spoke to mine about it after 2nd m/c and she said I'd need to see a specialist. There isn't alot of reasearch that shows it helps at all, but it definately doesn't hurt which is why I was put on it. Like Kelzie_rose, alot of ladies attribute it to successful pregnancies. If I am lucky enough to get utd again I am going to be following the Colorado Protocol which is basically a whole cocktail of drugs that supposedly prevent anything and everything - that is because after all my tests my mc's are still unexplained. Thats a big part of why I wanted to try acupuncture - she is looking from another perspective (from western medicine) and so I feel it's well worth a shot. ------------- 5 wee Angels - Always in our hearts - Aug '11, Feb '12, Aug '12, Feb '13, Aug '13
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Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 27 June 2013 at 9:50pm
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I changed my name slightly...I don't want people thinking I live in the US ;-) Not that there's anything wrong with that (I grew up there) but I'm a Kiwi now. Wow, Redtulip, thanks for the info. Very interesting! I only just started TTC in March - there's so much to learn. I don't even think we have an acupuncturist within an hours drive of here... let alone a fertility one. Oh, the joys of a small rural town. |
Posted By: redtulip
Date Posted: 27 June 2013 at 10:00pm
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No problem a.girl Anything else you want to know just ask away, if I can help I'm happy to answer. Must be lovely living rurally. I get sick of the pace here sometimes. You could ask your GP if someone there does acupunture - they'd be sure to know if you're in a small town. Goodnite (hmmmm... no sleepy emoticon lol)! ------------- 5 wee Angels - Always in our hearts - Aug '11, Feb '12, Aug '12, Feb '13, Aug '13
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Posted By: monkeys
Date Posted: 28 June 2013 at 12:54pm
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I too am going through acupuncture after 3 M/C unexplained. I also go once a week, and with herbs, and he told us to not try for 3 months - that was tough to take, as I felt it was wasting valuable time! But I have noticed big changes to my AF in this time, so its doing something, and have taken the time to focus on losing weight instead. Into our last month of waiting now, and looking forward to trying again next month. Like Redtulip - nothing else seems to be helping so really hoping Acu is the answer!! I will go on Progesterone this time as well - even though my levels have seemed ok in the past its just another thing that I can try and that can't hurt ------------- 3 little Angels July 10, May 11, Apr 13
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Posted By: tan73
Date Posted: 28 June 2013 at 6:52pm
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Hi everyone, So I had my appointment with the naturopath today. She was great and really thorough. She has said she make up a formula that contains vitex and a whole lot of other things to make my lining good and healthy. She has asked me to not try for 3 months too, Monkeys! I am feeling slightly panicked about this but at the same time I think, in the whole scheme of things, it is probably best. And it's really a speck of time in my whole life. She said that I could go on Clomid now, and get pg again, but that, from everything I have told her, and from my test results, that it could be that my lining needs to be a lot more healthy in order to welcome a fertilised egg. I think she is right, so I will give it a shot. What with that and the acupuncture, I should be well prepared for a healthy pregnancy. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 2 Angels - Aug '12 & Mar '13 Always in our hearts. |
Posted By: redtulip
Date Posted: 28 June 2013 at 8:35pm
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Hi ladies.... my acu lady didn't mention not trying until this month when dh and I had already bd'd.... but then I ov'd at totally different time to what I usually do so chances of bfp are very low. She wants my temps to improve first. Monkeys - are you seeing a specialist/RPL clinic? Ask about the Colorado Protocol if you are able to. For anyone interested I've also been reading about Natural Killer cells (NT cells). Basically they are cells we all have in our bodies, they fight tumors and cells with viruses. Although controversial, it is thought (by some) that ladies that have recurrent m/c's may have elevated levels of NK cells and that this causes their body to terminate pregnancy. Anyway, part of following the Colorado Protocol includes using medication that prevents our body from doing this - among other drugs. Anyone else know much about the protocol or NK cells? Sorry guys, bit heavy for a Friday evening lol! Hope you all have a great weekend. ------------- 5 wee Angels - Always in our hearts - Aug '11, Feb '12, Aug '12, Feb '13, Aug '13
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Posted By: redtulip
Date Posted: 28 June 2013 at 8:39pm
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Sorry Tans, reason I mentioned all this was because of what you'd said about your appt today and waiting 3 months - then I went off on a tangent! - meant to say that I'm really glad you had a positive experience and have new things to try. FX it's the key to a sticky, trouble-free pregnancy ------------- 5 wee Angels - Always in our hearts - Aug '11, Feb '12, Aug '12, Feb '13, Aug '13
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Posted By: kelzie_rose
Date Posted: 28 June 2013 at 10:21pm
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I had two miscarriages at 6 weeks - both of them I had found out I was UTD at about 5 weeks. The other miscarriage I found out I was UTD at 4 weeks, had a scan at 6 weeks and there was no fetal pole. NS Hospital didn't allow me to go for a d&c until I would have been about 9 weeks "just in case." ------------- Started TTC Apr 2008 With PCOS and a bicornuate uterus Our angel babies Jan 2010 <3 Oct 2010 <3 Apr 2011 <3 |
Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 29 June 2013 at 9:08pm
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How are you getting on Avid? Are you feeling any better? Nell, I saw in another thread that you may have a BFP!!! Fingers crossed. That's how my first one was - afternoon wees and so faint I thought I was seeing thing (but it was there!). I admire you ladies for waiting 3 months... I couldn't do it. It's only been one month since my mc, and I can't wait to start again (though today I wondered if I could handle another mc so soon if things didn't work out again). I've heard in so many places that women are very fertile after a mc - I want to take full advantage of that! |
Posted By: avidkeo
Date Posted: 29 June 2013 at 10:45pm
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Hey a.girl and everyone! Im doing fine. Had a moment yesterday that was a little awkward, but got through it with the help of a very good friend. I admit, I dont want to wait! DH wants to wait 1 month, so we are going to not try, but not prevent - I might do more of the not preventing than the not trying! haha. Im very much at the point now where I just want to move on, not forget that it happened, but concentrate on positive things, and hope that its only a one time occurence. The thing about being very fertile after a mc is more anecdotal, there is no scientific studys to back it up - however Im also hoping for that! |
Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 30 June 2013 at 9:10am
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I'm glad you're feeling a bit better, Avid. Those awkward moments seem to linger a bit more than I'd like them to, but I just take them in stride. Just keep looking to the future, but make sure you let yourself get upset if you feel that way. You want to make sure you deal with all these emotions before the next bubba makes his/her home inside you! I have a special necklace that a friend gave me to honor our angel - I think it's good for the same reasons you said. I don't want to forget, but I also want to move on. |
Posted By: Nellennium
Date Posted: 30 June 2013 at 9:29am
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Really pleased you decided what you wanted to do Tan So, hope it works wonders for you like it has for our other ladies! Are you doing anything to celebrate what life your baby had Avid? Or something as a loving reminder? DH and I buried the placenta in a HUGE pot (because we rent atm and plan on transporting) with a blossoming sweet smelling tree. It's blossoming at the moment which is really funny considering all the cold and frosts we have had lately. My mom also gave me a silver bracelet with a heart charm that I wear everyday. a.girl I did another test this morning, stark white BFN. Stupid tests! ------------- 4xMC, 3xMMC http://nellennium.blogspot.co.nz" rel="nofollow - Blog: Nellennium Ramblings |
Posted By: avidkeo
Date Posted: 30 June 2013 at 12:23pm
| oh nell thats annoying! I am going to plant a rose bush in our house - what ever house we manage to buy (we definitely want to buy a house, still hoping for the one we put an offer on but will have to wait and see). |
Posted By: Pitter patter
Date Posted: 30 June 2013 at 12:28pm
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Hi guys thought I'd join in here too if that is ok with you guys. This is a great super supportive thread so just had to join in!Already know lots of you from other threads but for those I don't know we had a mc last year in early Nov, it was a missed miscarriage, started spotting and cramping so asked for a scan when we discovered no heart beat, it had had a good strong heart beat at a scan at 6 weeks. Baby had stopped growing at about 7 weeks. Had the miscarriage naturally that night, was a horrible experience painful like a labour. I know everyone has different mc experiences but now I which I'd been in hospital and the other thing I wish I'd done differently is take iron tablets/a good multivitimen afterwards as I was run down afterwards. Re ttc after mc, we waited one month and then getting back into it helped with grieving, it felt good to be moving on. Monkeys and Tan having a few months off while you get super healthy sounds like a great idea, I didn't have the disapline to do that dispite a natropath recommending it. Avid and a.girl, sorry to hear about your recent losses, big hugs to you guys Nel stink re bfn this morning! stupid tests indeed! I am going to test tomorrow probably, af slightly late now which of course means nothing but have my hopes up! -------------  TTC number 2 since April 2011 MC Nov 12 Formally Mamma2one |
Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 30 June 2013 at 2:04pm
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Welcome to this thread, Pitter Patter. I'm sorry that your circumstances put you here, but we're happy to have you Thanks for your support and encouragement Avid, the rose bush sounds like a great idea. I was actually upset with my friend buying me my necklace with our angel baby's birthstone in it (though I never told her) but I was very grateful for her gesture. Over the last 2 weeks though, I have really come to appreciate it and love what it means. Initially, I think it was a bit much for me though. Nell, sorry to hear about the BFN. Onwards and upwards! |
Posted By: Pitter patter
Date Posted: 30 June 2013 at 2:34pm
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Thanks for the welcome a. girl. It is nice to have something to remember the lost baby by-nice that you like the necklace now. A friend who had also had a mc gave me a crystal which I have hanging in the sun, I really like it-it reminds me of the baby but in a nice way, and it makes rainbows in the sun- rainbow babies is what they call babies born after a baby loss- I quite like that
------------- TTC number 2 since April 2011 MC Nov 12 Formally Mamma2one |
Posted By: monkeys
Date Posted: 01 July 2013 at 4:00pm
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hey redtulip - where can I find out more about the colorado protocol? Have heard it in relation to IVF but that is all, and just tried to google but couldnt really find much relating to MC and what would be involved. We have been seeing FA however haven't been overly happy with numerous things to be fair ------------- 3 little Angels July 10, May 11, Apr 13
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Posted By: tan73
Date Posted: 01 July 2013 at 7:01pm
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Hi there, I saw the naturopath on Friday and thought I would share some of the recommendations she has made to help with fertility and a healthy lining. I also need to lose some weight, so some of her recommendations were for this. First and foremost, a good prenatal vitamin - I use Solgar. Next, a herbal formula made up of the following: Chaste Tree (Vitex),Shatavari, Withania, Bupleurum and Licorice. This is meant to be good for uterine health, a healthy lining, progesterone production and hormone balance. She also recommended Vitamin C - 1000mg. This can improve overall fertility outcomes as an antioxidant for the ovaries. Vitamin E for ovarian health and hormonal balance. Cinnamon - for increased blood flow to the uterus. I think she means the proper cinnamon from a herbal dispensary, as opposed to the stuff from the supermarket. Oh and also, Zinc - for both of us. We are taking Zinc drops in water - no taste and DH doesn't mind, so that's good. Zinc is really important for good fertility apparently. Anyway, that's about it. It'll cost a bit, but I am keen to give it all a go. Hope it's helpful for some of you. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 2 Angels - Aug '12 & Mar '13 Always in our hearts. |
Posted By: Julietta
Date Posted: 02 July 2013 at 1:40pm
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Hi everyone, I'm just lurking around here, really love reading everyone's posts and I'm sorry for the pain you have all endured. I just got my 3rd BFP this morning, have had 2 early miscarriages this year already so I am hoping and praying this isn't another. I've been feeling really run down since miscarrying a month ago too, just trying to take care of myself, get lots of sleep, take all my vitamins etc.. Thanks for the advice on the vitamin C, definitely going to add that to the long list of supplements I take!! Anyway hope you all have a wonderful week x ------------- http://pregnancy.baby-gaga.com/" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: Julietta
Date Posted: 02 July 2013 at 1:55pm
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RT just wanted to mention about temps - mine is like yours, usually 35.5 - 35.9 before ovulation and my coverline is usually 36.1ish after ovulation, with temps usually sitting around 36.3-36.4 So low! I did ask my acupuncturist about it and she does ask me to use a hot water bottle pre-ovulation. I asked the Dr too but they had no idea what it meant! ------------- http://pregnancy.baby-gaga.com/" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 02 July 2013 at 4:09pm
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Congrats Julietta. I hope everything works out for you this time... 3rd time lucky!!! Did you only mc a month ago and are already UTD??? Good work :-) My HCG is finally down to 7. Yay! I thought I'd never be celebrating falling HCG's but it's been a loooooong last few weeks watching them fall so slowly. I can't believe how slowly those last few fall. It took a week to go from 15 to 7! |
Posted By: babygiraffe
Date Posted: 02 July 2013 at 6:39pm
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Awesome Julietta! That's fab news - 3rd time lucky alright I hope its a drama free, enjoyable pregnancy for you. Isn't it great when your hcg levels drop! Just means its all good to get back on the horse again
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Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 02 July 2013 at 8:07pm
| Avid, I saw in another thread that you're on CD9 after a mc... me too! Well, I think. I had a funny period like thing 9 days ago but I'm not sure what it was. I've been opk-ing for the last few days cause I don't want to miss it. I know my HCG's are only at 7 now, but I could ovulate anytime (well, I'm hoping to anyway). Good luck to you!!!! |
Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 02 July 2013 at 8:21pm
| Avid, look at our charts side by side from the charting girls thread - they're so similar in temps for the last few days. Coincidence??? |
Posted By: redtulip
Date Posted: 03 July 2013 at 7:23am
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Hi ladies, Monkeys, sorry for late reply - actually typed out a long one last night and lost it before I posted it - Arggggggh! So wanted to get baack to you about the Colorado Protocol. The Specialist at the RPL clinic suggested I look it up after my last appt (after 4th m/c) as she said it's an option for next time. Most of what I found also related to IVF. I asked about it on another forum and a lady there said she had followed the CP during all 3 of her successful pregnancies (all IVF). It basically was: taking Augmentin (or a similar antibiotic) to help prevent infection. Taking Prednisone to suppress immune system and stop auto-immune response such as your body seeing the pregnancy as a foreign object and trying to attack it (thats when I started reading about NK cells, sure i mentioned in a previous post), taking Clexane or similar to help thin the blood, prevent clots and assist blood flow to the uterus. So, sounds pretty full-on but definitely will be pushing for it next time round, even if just to feel I'm doing as much as humanly possible to help prevent another m/c. Will also be using progesterone suppositories again. Really sorry to hear FA haven't been what you expected - is there a chance you could see someone else for another opinion? I often feel frustrated by the people I see - but I guess without them being able to find a problem it makes it hard to know what to treat. That's why I'm liking the sound of the CP - sounds like it covers alot of 'could be' causes. I will definately let you know whenever I find out anything else. Julietta, wishing you heaps and heaps of luck for a sticky bean this time around. Sounds like you are being really sensible and putting your needs first - good on you! It can sometimes be a bit hard joining a 'due in' thread after previous m/c so if you want to hang out here and have us all cheer you on you're more than welcome (sure no one will mind). It's just nice to have somewhere to come for support. Really interesting about your temps too. So how often/when were you using the hot water bottle? Makes sense! I've been wearing lots of layers to bed (ha, ha - poor dh - what a passion killer!!) and my temps have gone up a bit. Have acupuncture today and she said she was going to start me on Kidney Yin (?) herbs which should help raise temp... so will see. Will let you know how it goes just out of interest. Tans, glad to see things are going well for you, really hope it does the trick! A.girl - great that your hcg level has dropped. Hi Pitter patter and BG Sorry if I've missed anyone. ------------- 5 wee Angels - Always in our hearts - Aug '11, Feb '12, Aug '12, Feb '13, Aug '13
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Posted By: Julietta
Date Posted: 03 July 2013 at 8:11am
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Thanks RT, I think I will wait a bit before joining the due in thread so would love to hang out here! So I use the hot water bottle from the first day of AF until I ovulate, I keep it right on my stomach/upper body (when I'm in bed). She doesn't advise using it after ovulation just in case there's an embryo in there! My acupuncturist doesn't seem to be much of a herbalist so I find all the herb stuff super fascinating! ------------- http://pregnancy.baby-gaga.com/" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: avidkeo
Date Posted: 03 July 2013 at 9:08am
| Oh a.girl, we are cycle buddies! Im going to start OPK's on the weekend I think, Im checking CM as well, and dont want to start OPK's too soon, dont want to waste them. As mentioned in another thread, I did use one this morning just to see what my levels would be like on an OPK test, and was a complete negative, so looks like levels have dropped really quickly. so we should be testing around the same time as well! I usually have longer cycles - about 32 days, so ov about day 16. |
Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 03 July 2013 at 2:44pm
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Cycle-buddy-Avid, I've been using opk's everyday because I'm worried about missing the surge since I'm sure my hormones are totally messed up. I did an opk 2 and a half weeks ago, the day after my spotting stopped from my mc, and it was positive (hcg was still in my system) but it was negative later on that day. Strange! Then I had that funny period thing last week (10 days after the +opk). I'm sure my levels are all over the place! Long story short, for the sake of a $10, I started testing early. I have no idea what my cycles will be like - I was on the pill for so long then got UTD straight after I stopped taking it. We're happy to have you hanging out with us, Julietta. I TOTALLY understand your apprehension to the Due In threads. We can all live vicariously through you! Redtulip, when is your next round of IVF? Good luck!!! |
Posted By: avidkeo
Date Posted: 03 July 2013 at 3:22pm
| A.girl, I think im going to start testing tonight, just to be sure! hehe, I got them off trademe, $20 for 40 of them, so in the scheme of things not that big a deal! and to think I almost gave them away when I got my BFP! |
Posted By: redtulip
Date Posted: 03 July 2013 at 3:45pm
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Hiya... glad you're going to stay in with us Julietta... stay as long as you want. a.girl, I'm not doing IVF, sorry - probably confused you because i said my specialist has suggested I try medications that are commonly used by ladies that are doing IVF. It may help me the next time I get utd. Can only try. ------------- 5 wee Angels - Always in our hearts - Aug '11, Feb '12, Aug '12, Feb '13, Aug '13
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Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 03 July 2013 at 6:58pm
| opps. Sorry Redtulip. I was a bit confused. I hope it works for you. I've never heard of that before, but as I have heard heaps about women miscarrying because they're bodies treat the wee group of cells as a pathogen. I actually just taught my 7th form chem class about how HCG's (an amino acid) polarity keeps the antibodies from killing it. I find the science of the is all so interesting! |
Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 03 July 2013 at 6:58pm
| ps- redtulip, how far along were you with your mc's? Were they early? DId you ever get tests done? |
Posted By: redtulip
Date Posted: 03 July 2013 at 7:17pm
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Hi a.girl - no prob - great to know you're a chemistry teacher if I ever need to ask anything lol! I've lost all 4 pregnancies early - between 5 - 6 weeks. The first two weren't tested but had karyotype tests done for 3rd and 4th. The tests showed that 3rd pregnancy was totally healthy and would have been a boy. Tests after 4th m/c showed that it had occurred because of Trisomy 16. So at least results of last one showed nothing could have prevented the outcome - was very sad after knowing the results of 3rd tho... especially finding out what the sex of our bean would have been - m/c is hard enough and it just made it that bit more personal (if that makes sense?) But still happy we found out. ------------- 5 wee Angels - Always in our hearts - Aug '11, Feb '12, Aug '12, Feb '13, Aug '13
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Posted By: babygiraffe
Date Posted: 03 July 2013 at 9:35pm
How is everyone going? We are approaching ov, gonna hit it hard this month. haha.. I just want it to happen now, sick of all this waiting  Been reading up on the acupuncture thread and thinking that its probably something I should be looking in to but realistically its just not affordable at the moment being on one income. DH would freak, I couldn't do it to him. So I need to take control myself as best I can which means sorting out my diet and exercise. So I'm not going to wait until Monday, I'm going to start tomorrow and make a real effort  Go me!
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Posted By: Julietta
Date Posted: 04 July 2013 at 8:27am
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Yay babygiraffe, sounds like a great plan!! ------------- http://pregnancy.baby-gaga.com/" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: daros
Date Posted: 04 July 2013 at 8:56am
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Hi ladies, Just sneak in to wish you all the best for your TTC journey. Me too had 2 losses in the last 6 months, i just actually completed my 3rd IVF and doing another one on sept/oct. if you are keen please read my post older post of our TTC journey via IVF/PGD due hubby has rare bone disease will pass on to our child if not biopsy. So our embryos has to be tested in Monash Australia and transferred at day 5 or six. In the last cycle 5/5 of my beautiful blastocyst grade 1 embryos were affected by the disease so i had no transfer at all. The first and second fresh IVF/PGD resulted in BFP and miscarried. I do have some good knowledge of IVF journey, process, good supplements for egg quality etc so if you have any questions please feel free to ask. Iam not always here because i was discovered here and introduced to other closed group of TTC ladies but i do get message if anyone comment on my post. Good luck ladies, have faith and i always believe miracle do happens! Rosey. |
Posted By: emsbet
Date Posted: 04 July 2013 at 7:55pm
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Thanks Rosey :) This month I've decided to start tracking things - have just finished AF (my second one since mc) but it was a bit strange (for me anyway) - my first AF after mc was about 3 days of bleeding (a little heavier than usual but more bright red in terms of the bleeding) but this one has been 6 days of light spotting only ... I hope it's ok - might have to start paying more attention to previous tips on here about uterine/lining health etc! |
Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 04 July 2013 at 9:44pm
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RT, that's good that you had the testing done with the last two, but it must be SO hard knowing that the 3rd one was didn't have any chromosomal problems. I find comfort in thinking that our mc was because the wee bean couldn't develop any further. Thanks for popping in Daros :-) Good to have someone some support in that area if we need it. Sounds like your journey has been quite long and difficult. All the best in Sept/Oct for you!!!! |
Posted By: Pitter patter
Date Posted: 05 July 2013 at 12:04am
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Hi guys, can't sleep so what better to do than oh baby. Was really interested to read about this Colorado protocol, last time I got pregnant I was on antibiotics for a bad throat infection and taking lots of disperin for pain (obviously didn't think I was pregnant). I had been thinking with the benefit of hindsight that all those disperin for blood thining might have helped and maybe even the antibiotics too, hmm. Lost the baby after I was better and wasn't on antibiotics or taking disperin. Redtulip I am useless at sticking to temping but when ever I have I have had similar low temps, had read it could be caused by sleeping with my mouth open-do you do that? Did you Julietta? Also could be hypothyroidism, which I have been tested for as have many symptoms of it but was told all ok. Anyways I should ask my acupuncturist about it.Also hot water bottle sounds a gd idea Rosey really hope your next IVF round works xx BG your new health kick is inspiring, how did day 1 go? Good on you Tan thanks for the info from your natropath, not sure if said that to you already ------------- TTC number 2 since April 2011 MC Nov 12 Formally Mamma2one |
Posted By: Julietta
Date Posted: 05 July 2013 at 1:57pm
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Oooh PP I hadn't heard about the mouth open thing.. I'm not sure if I do! I know I clench my teeth in my sleep because I wake up with an aching jaw! I have thought about hypothyroidism, my results came back ok for that, but I wonder if I have a mild case of it as I do have a few of the symptoms.. ------------- http://pregnancy.baby-gaga.com/" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 06 July 2013 at 5:24pm
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What does the hot water bottle on the stomach do? I think I missed something
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Posted By: blondie23
Date Posted: 07 July 2013 at 7:50am
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Hi ladies some of you may know my situation but for those that don't here goes. At my 12 week scan they found excess fluid around baby's head and neck. For the next 6 weeks we had lots of tests, scans and appointments to see what was going on and if it would improve. Unfortunately it didn't and my DH and I made the heartbreaking decision to end the pregnancy. Though my body seem to be starting all on its own. On Thursday I gave birth to a beautiful boy, Connor Fraser at 2.25pm. He was obvisiously sick so we knew we made the right decision. We are now grieving for a baby we so desperately wanted. We had been trying for 16 months and had 2 rounds of clomid to get pregnant and this was the first time I'd ever been pregnant. Now after that novel my question is, when did you all start trying again? I've had conflicting reports from different people and now in confused. DH and I want to start as soon as possible incase it takes that long again. We are ofcourse terrified of what might happen next time but are willing to give it another shot. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: tan73
Date Posted: 07 July 2013 at 9:36am
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Blondie - my heart goes out to you. I have been thinking of you lots and I always had that little bit of hope that things might turn out okay, as I am sure you did. As for trying again, what has your doctor said? As far as I know, there is absolutely nothing wrong with trying again as soon as you are mentally ready, unless you are told otherwise. Sometimes, if there is damage to your body or something that needs investigating, they may tell you to wait. I think only you and DH know when is the right time emotionally. I think you need to consider how you would feel if you got pg again first pop. I do know someone who did and wished they had waited longer. Physically and emotionally, it was very trying for them. But now they have their baby and of course, are very happy. After my first m/c, we tried again after I had gotten my first AF. It took us 5 months. With the second m/c, we have still not really tried. I wasn't ready physically or emotionally, and we were having tests and procedures done. We didn't really want to conceive until we knew for sure that we were okay. I wish you all the best in making your decision. It is only yours to make. xxx ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 2 Angels - Aug '12 & Mar '13 Always in our hearts. |
Posted By: a.girl
Date Posted: 07 July 2013 at 10:03am
Blondie, tears still come to my eyes when I read your story  I keep trying to thing of things to help comfort you, but if you're anything like I was, nothing helps other than knowing people are thinking of you and wishing you well. Welcome to our group of lovely, supportive and helpful ladies.My mc only happened 5 weeks ago, so we're still in the stage of waiting to see what my body's doing. I had a funny period like think 3 weeks after the mc, but I still had an HCG level of 15, so I'm not too sure what it was. We decided after that to treat it like a period and start trying, so I'm tracking my ovulation now and trying again. I found it helped to have a few weeks of mourning but I needed to start looking ahead to stop me from feeling so depressed. Focusing on the future has helped me from dwelling in the past or the "what should be" thinking. Everyone's so different though. My doctor said to wait until I had a normal period, but she also said they recommend that for dating purposes. Who knows what's normal after a mc!?!?!!? My body has definitely changed in the lady dept since the preg and mc. I feel the same as you - I don't want to wait in case it takes a long time. Trust your body and your intuition. |
Posted By: avidkeo
Date Posted: 07 July 2013 at 11:07am
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Blondie, I wish to send you the biggest hugs, and positive thoughts. I MC at 6w5d so cant say I know what you are going though. I did enquire about when we can start again. My GP said we can start right away, my midwife said to wait a month, and another Dr (my boss) suggested waiting a couple of months. Doing the reading there is no scientific reason to try again immediately or to wait a couple of months. I think if everything is ok physically, as in you had a complete MC, then there is no physical reason you cant try again immediately. I know Drs/midwives do say to wait a month to make things easier for dating, but as my GP pointed out they have dating scans for that! Mentally, you have to make that decision and everyone is Different. I absoloutly see where DH is coming from, even though we fell pregnant fairly easily, I really want to try again immediately, while DH wants to wait a month. For me I have acknowledged my baby, and grieved, and still grieve, but I want to move on as quickly as possible, and to try get pregnant again so I can celebrate joy. DH is keen to try but just wants a month to move on. We have come to the agreement not to try this month, but not prevent. At the end of the day there is no right or wrong answer, you have to do what is right for you and your DH. There is no scientific evidence that you will more easily fall pregnant after a MC, but there is a LOT of anecdotal evidence. What ever you decide, I hope things happen quickly for you.
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