Considering a third. Age gap 8 yrs & I'm gtng oldr
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Topic: Considering a third. Age gap 8 yrs & I'm gtng oldr
Posted By: readyforanother?
Subject: Considering a third. Age gap 8 yrs & I'm gtng oldr
Date Posted: 17 June 2015 at 12:03pm
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My husband and I are considering having a 3rd child. DD is now 6, DS is now 5. Due to work and needing to add onto the house first, we're planning for a Dec 2016 birth. I know this sounds mad "Planning" but it would mean we could afford to add the extra room to the house first- as its a small house - and get me more settled in my current part time job- with the birth fitting in with easy holiday time. All going well, I would be 37 and a half at the birth. DD would be 7 and 3/4. DS would be 6 and a 1/2. Are we mad? Is there anyone in a similar situation that would like to chat? Up till now I've felt too busy with our current two- but now they are more able to play together, help with little jobs, and nicely settled at school- I feel I could actually handle having another. Whereas before I was too scared. We just can't fathom getting on with it now though- as financially it would make us struggle again- hencey the planned delay. The thing that scares me the most is the sleep deprivation again. I'm not very good when woken a lot- for a baby I know I'd understand, but then coping with an older two- would it be too much?. I should be able to take 3 months off after the birth though at least. I can't talk to my family about it yet- I worry they'd tell me I'm silly and will just be putting myself through stress again. But my husband and I don't want to have any regrets and love our little kids so much. Would love to find others in similar situations to chat with. |
Replies:
Posted By: MerlinFluff
Date Posted: 20 September 2015 at 8:41pm
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How did you get on?? I'm TTC my second child and have up til now been too terrified to try getting pregnant for fear I wont cope. My DS is now nearly 5 and we've decided the time is right. I'm also really bad at getting woken a lot with a new brn, I get unwell mentally on little sleep. Scary times. Let us know how you got on.
------------- ***Elly***  
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Posted By: readyforanother?
Date Posted: 20 September 2015 at 8:59pm
Hi MerlinFluff, I've had differing advice from everyone so we've got to the stage of thinking we won't try for a third, and need to put all our love and attention into the two we have. The kids are awesome but push my buttons. I've been on medication to assist with my desire to "yell"  for a few years now. Now also im taking up meditation because I still can get so wound up by the kids' antics. It shows me it might not be healthy for me mentally to have another. I'm too worried about the possible effect mentally, esp if more tired. You've made the decision to TTC and that's awesome. You will definitely need support though. Are you on meds to help too already? |
Posted By: MerlinFluff
Date Posted: 20 September 2015 at 9:13pm
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Sounds like a fair call to make if your two kids push your buttons as it is. I'm lucky to have a cruisy as anything 4 year old and he's been easy peasy all the way through. I'm on an arsenal of medications as I get pretty unwell with severe mental health issues, though something about pregnancy and young children seem to make me more stable rather than less. Luckily!! I'm terrified it won't be the same the second time around and I'll get stressed and unwell trying to cope with a second child. But I'll have to find out the hard way! ------------- ***Elly***
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Posted By: readyforanother?
Date Posted: 20 September 2015 at 9:19pm
| Well at least if pregnancy and little ones haven't been the issue in the past hopefully that remains the same. Try to think that way maybe? He he. Easy to say right! They are so special and really the whole reason behind life right, and your DS is at an age he could be a good little helper. Take care and all the best! |