My husband and I decided to start our family when I was 28 years old. We had done our overseas trips and lived in UK for three years, and felt it was time to “settle down” to do the house and family thing. For some reason I always felt that getting pregnant and having children would be easy…
We lost our first baby at nine weeks but never realised until our 14 week scan. I remember saying to someone at work how I felt so good, you wouldn’t know I was even “with child” as I use to say. Little did I know the insight of my words.
Due to still retaining the baby, I underwent what was to be the first of three D & C’s*. We were devastated, but armed with the advice that it was common to lose your first, I fell pregnant fairly quickly again. Again, at around eight weeks, we lost our second baby, but like the first, only found out at the 12 week scan. D & C number two. Being a Christian, my faith took a huge battering, and I was shattered over our two babies. Thankfully, we had a huge network of family and friends who really kept praying and just being there for us. We got pregnant again, but this time we went through the Recurrent Miscarriage Clinic at National Women’s. After 14 weeks on-and-off bed rest, countless blood tests and weekly scans, a near loss at 10 weeks with a large bleed and prayer overload, we made it through the dreaded first trimester. Georgia Zoe was born full term!
Since then we have gone on to lose two more babies (D&C number three) around seven weeks. I didn't go through the clinic with the last two, thinking I could do it on my own. We are now trying to get pregnant again, and I guess being that much older, although not 'too' old, but still 5-6 years older, it's proving more difficult. We will be going through the clinic this time, but it's much easier than the first two losses, because we have Georgia.
I realise how blessed we are with her, so I know at least I can do it, it just may take more time. Sometimes I feel down about my body not being able to do what I just believed to be natural, but I know that things could be worse, and that keeps me grateful for what I do have…a wonderful husband, incredible parents, and a beautiful little girl.
People often ask me, “just the one child?”, and I always feel like saying, “no actually we are the parents of five, but four are in heaven.”
* Dilation and curettage (D&C) refers to the dilation (widening/opening) of the cervix and surgical removal of part of the lining of the uterus and/or contents of the uterus by scraping and scooping (curettage). It is a therapeutic gynecological procedure as well as the most often used method of first trimester miscarriage or abortion.