OHbaby! Forums : How can I help? https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/ Copyright (c) 2006-2013 Web Wiz Forums - All Rights Reserved. Mon, 06 Apr 2026 01:57:59 +0000 Mon, 19 May 2008 18:21:55 +0000 http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss Web Wiz Forums 12.05 360 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/RSS_post_feed.asp?TID=17364 <![CDATA[OHbaby! Forums]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_images/web_wiz_forums.png https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/ <![CDATA[How can I help? : Yeah hard one alright. He chould...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17364&PID=388111&title=how-can-i-help#388111 Author: mummy_becks
Subject: 17364
Posted: 19 May 2008 at 6:21pm

Yeah hard one alright. He chould suck it up and speak to his Staff Sergent that is in charge of him to go on light duties for a few days as he is not in the right head space at the moment.

You could always tell him I feel the same way in a way as Nigel is in Waiouru and I am here all by myself and struggling but I just suck it up some days and deal with it - there are the odd days I don't but we are all entitled to those days.

]]> Mon, 19 May 2008 18:21:55 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17364&PID=388111&title=how-can-i-help#388111 <![CDATA[How can I help? : That IS a tough one Stacey, esp...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17364&PID=387809&title=how-can-i-help#387809 Author: Maya
Subject: 17364
Posted: 19 May 2008 at 12:46pm

That IS a tough one Stacey, esp coz guys are notoriously bad at addressing their "issues" at the best of times, I can imagine army guys are even worse!

I don't really know what to suggest, but will have a think about it. I will say tho that he is lucky to have such a caring and committed friend.]]> Mon, 19 May 2008 12:46:51 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17364&PID=387809&title=how-can-i-help#387809 <![CDATA[How can I help? : I don&#039;t think that speech...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17364&PID=387778&title=how-can-i-help#387778 Author: kebakat
Subject: 17364
Posted: 19 May 2008 at 12:26pm

I don't think that speech will do anything in all honesty. He would just go into his own little world and be completely by himself. I told him I was tempted to spike his drink with a sleeping pill the other night when he had dinner with me - I wouldn't actually even if it was tempting!]]> Mon, 19 May 2008 12:26:06 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17364&PID=387778&title=how-can-i-help#387778 <![CDATA[How can I help? : Thats a really tough one Stacey...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17364&PID=387662&title=how-can-i-help#387662 Author: MissAngel
Subject: 17364
Posted: 19 May 2008 at 10:36am

Thats a really tough one Stacey - i've been there with friends of mine as well. Its really freaken annoying when you really want to help them, but they wont accept the help or do anything to help themselves.
Sometimes the best thing (and the hardest thing) is to just say to them 'Look, I'm trying to help you as much as I can, but you dont want the help so come talk to me when you've decided you want my help'
9 times out of 10 it works. Its so hard to do, but you cant let it drag you down as well. You have to think about your OWN mental stability and health :)
*hugs* to you tho, he'll sit there one day and go omg she was fully trying to help me so much and I was being a retard!]]> Mon, 19 May 2008 10:36:45 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17364&PID=387662&title=how-can-i-help#387662 <![CDATA[How can I help? : I&#039;m worried about a guy friend...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17364&PID=387648&title=how-can-i-help#387648 Author: kebakat
Subject: 17364
Posted: 19 May 2008 at 10:30am

I'm worried about a guy friend of mine and I was wanting to see if anyone had any ideas on how I can help him..

He's an army dude, so tries to hide away to be macho and get on with things and he's so freakin stubborn when it comes to help..

At the start of the year he realised that his relationship of 2 yrs wasn't working out for him. He wasn't totally committed to her and felt like something was missing so after a month of feeling miserable he told her it was over and she moved out.

He's quite the sensitive guy so felt sooooo much guilt over making her feel bad and all that.

Since then he was chatting with a chick online and they both got close to each other but that hasn't worked out the way he wanted it to and it looks as though they won't even get to meet.

I can tell that he is depressed because..
- he doesn't sleep
- when he sleeps he says its really crap
- hes sleeping on his couch rather than his bed because he said his bed is too big for one person
- he doesnt have an apetite so doesnt eat hardly anything
- hes lost 5kg over the past few weeks
- hes not socialising (he use to go to army parties most weekends)
- hes not smiley (this is extremely weird for him)

Last night I went over to his house because he asked me to. It was obvious he had used clear eyes to hide the fact he had been crying. He was just so down. He's hurting himself at work because he can't concentrate cause he's so tired so his body is basically just packing up. I'm worried about him because he's going into the field to do some crazy ass stuff and he kept saying that the field will sort him out. But I know he's going to come back with some sort of injury.

It's total bollocks. He won't accept help. I know he won't do anything totally dumb like purposfully hurt himself but I don't think that his body and mind can deal with all this by himself.

I've tried offering him natural sleeping remedies and even offered to give him one of my sleeping pills (prescription stuff) just so he can get one good nights sleep but he just says it will sort itself out and refuses any suggestion I have.

The only thing I've succeeded in so far as far as help goes is giving him hugs but that's never going to be enough to help him out of this hole.

Any ideas at all?]]> Mon, 19 May 2008 10:30:37 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17364&PID=387648&title=how-can-i-help#387648