OHbaby! Forums : Affairs https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/ Copyright (c) 2006-2013 Web Wiz Forums - All Rights Reserved. Thu, 09 Apr 2026 20:13:17 +0000 Thu, 05 Jun 2008 18:06:16 +0000 http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss Web Wiz Forums 12.05 360 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/RSS_post_feed.asp?TID=17942 <![CDATA[OHbaby! Forums]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_images/web_wiz_forums.png https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/ <![CDATA[Affairs : It&#039;s all fun and games until...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404732&title=affairs#404732 Author: pepsi
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 6:06pm

It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye...]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 18:06:16 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404732&title=affairs#404732 <![CDATA[Affairs : I agree with you Stacey, morally...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404731&title=affairs#404731 Author: Kels
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 6:05pm

I agree with you Stacey, morally if he knows she is married then he is just as bad as her.]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 18:05:40 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404731&title=affairs#404731 <![CDATA[Affairs : Sounds like a very foolish thing...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404730&title=affairs#404730 Author: busymum
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 6:04pm

Sounds like a very foolish thing to do. What if the wife split up with her husband for the new fling, months down the track he'll be wondering if he's gonna be dumped for a new bloke too!]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 18:04:43 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404730&title=affairs#404730 <![CDATA[Affairs : They are both as stupid as each...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404706&title=affairs#404706 Author: .Mel
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 5:33pm

They are both as stupid as each other. In the end they will both wake up and realise that they can't get it on anymore (sounds like she's the player in this fling too) and then there will be the reality check about the fact that they still have to continue working together and then there will be the discussion about the fact that someone has to leave..

Your friend is the one that is losing out. If she's getting it from him, no doubt she is getting it from her husband too, and I wouldn't be all that surprised if the husband already has his suspicions.

]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 17:33:31 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404706&title=affairs#404706 <![CDATA[Affairs : I agree with you Stacey I have...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404675&title=affairs#404675 Author: Shezamumof3
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 4:52pm

I agree with you Stacey

I have been cheated on, I was with this guy for 5 years and he cheated on me. Its the most horrible feeling in the world.

I think that he should think about how her husband would feel.

Its not right, I think the women and your friend are equally in the wrong. If your not happy in a relationship, end it the right way.]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 16:52:50 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404675&title=affairs#404675 <![CDATA[Affairs : Its a hard situation, I met my...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404568&title=affairs#404568 Author: NeoshasMummy
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 3:26pm

Its a hard situation, I met my partner while he was engaged to someone else we worked together and I was YOUNG, I didnt know he had a partner and before I knew it I was head over heels by the time I found out about the other woman I was too caught up so he left his gf for me (she was a psyco though and pulled out the whole im pregnant card when he left NOT) but anyway I guess you cant help who you fall for and every situation is different. I do agree that if he knows she is married, it is kind of nasty but its his life so his problem I guess she wont leave her hubby so he will be left hearbroken.

Things happen for a reason and the wife obviously isnt happy. Its a really really sad situation that I wouldnt wish upon anybody and dearly hope it never happens to me.]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 15:26:34 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404568&title=affairs#404568 <![CDATA[Affairs : It&#039;s a hard one... But my...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404553&title=affairs#404553 Author: surfergirl
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 3:10pm

It's a hard one...
But my personal opinion (after a fairly sh*tty year of people making judgements about me)...is that you can't judge someone until you've walked (more than!) a mile in their shoes. Things often look different from the 'outside' - even if you're closely involved. No one *really* knows the reality of someone else’s life.
I however do not condone affairs, cannot imagine cheating on my DH or him cheating on me - but I've learnt (the hard way) to never say never...
Hope this makes sense....]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 15:10:58 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404553&title=affairs#404553 <![CDATA[Affairs : ...that is just plain wrong.....this...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404547&title=affairs#404547 Author: Roksana
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 3:06pm

...that is just plain wrong.....this kinda thing also makes me

I would slap both of them!! ]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 15:06:14 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404547&title=affairs#404547 <![CDATA[Affairs : It does aye... ]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404530&title=affairs#404530 Author: almostthere
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 2:45pm

It does aye... ]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 14:45:25 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404530&title=affairs#404530 <![CDATA[Affairs : On one hand, he&#039;s single...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404526&title=affairs#404526 Author: Snickerdoodle
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 2:41pm

On one hand, he's single and can do whatever the heck he likes.

On the other hand, she's a married woman and he shouldn't be going there.

At the end of the day, they're both grown ups and are responsible for their own choices.

Sucky situation
I hate hearing of this kinda thing.
Kinda makes a mockery of the sanctity of marriage.]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 14:41:39 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404526&title=affairs#404526 <![CDATA[Affairs : I have an opinion on this but...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404513&title=affairs#404513 Author: mummy_becks
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 2:37pm

I have an opinion on this but I am sorry I don't want to publicly voice it. I think you know what it is Stacey.

ETA: Stacey do I know who you are talking about?? We have talked about these people before haven't we??



Edited by mummy_becks]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 14:37:44 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404513&title=affairs#404513 <![CDATA[Affairs : Yep, i like that cake analogy! She&#039;s...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404509&title=affairs#404509 Author: almostthere
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 2:35pm

Yep, i like that cake analogy!
She's not being honest with herself not her husband nor her 'lover' if I was to pass my opinion. It may take guts to risk a marriage but it takes honesty to admit that it may be over. and being honest takes alot of energy!]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 14:35:51 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404509&title=affairs#404509 <![CDATA[Affairs : Maya wrote:I&#039;m with you...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404487&title=affairs#404487 Author: kebakat
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 2:15pm

Originally posted by Maya Maya wrote:

I'm with you Stacey - naughty boy! Not to mention setting himself up for a fall coz affairs very seldom end well for anyone concerned

Yup thats what I think.

Originally posted by joshierocks joshierocks wrote:

Ah, having her cake and eating it too..

Well put!]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 14:15:05 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404487&title=affairs#404487 <![CDATA[Affairs : She&#039;s apparently told him...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404478&title=affairs#404478 Author: Parki
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 2:10pm

[QUOTE=kebakat] She's apparently told him that if she had the guts to ditch the marriage she would love to be with him. But she's also said that she won't break the marriage up
QUOTE]

I think that is screwed up.

Marriage is a decision between two people. She doesn't HAVE to be in if she doesn't want to and my the sounds of that her heart isn't in it anyway.

I think it takes more guts risking a marriage and risking being caught and destroying your partners trust, respect and heart than it does to end it all together.


Once again, my opinion.....
]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 14:10:46 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404478&title=affairs#404478 <![CDATA[Affairs : I&#039;m with you Stacey - naughty...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404472&title=affairs#404472 Author: Maya
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 2:07pm

I'm with you Stacey - naughty boy! Not to mention setting himself up for a fall coz affairs very seldom end well for anyone concerned ]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 14:07:22 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404472&title=affairs#404472 <![CDATA[Affairs : Ah, having her cake and eating...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404471&title=affairs#404471 Author: Jay_R
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 2:05pm

Ah, having her cake and eating it too.

The thing that I know about affairs, is that they tend to become very intense very quickly. And that can lead to thinking that feelings are much stronger than they actually are. Given a "normal" situation, their time together would not be so emotionally and physically charged, as they would be free to spend as much time together as they wanted.

Horrible situation for all involved i'd say. I've recently helped a friend in a situation like this, and it's not nice.]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 14:05:55 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404471&title=affairs#404471 <![CDATA[Affairs : I wanted to add a bit more......]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404459&title=affairs#404459 Author: nikkitheknitter
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 2:00pm

I wanted to add a bit more... and it's just my musings on the topic.

I think that marriage is something that only works as a concept if it is respected by everyone... both the married person and those who aren't married.

I also believe marriage is very much a choice as well as a confirmation of your love for a person... she is clearly choosing to destroy the trust and that's a lack of self control (IMO). I don't believe it is irreparable and there are lots of grey areas of course but Grrr to both parties.

Rambly ramble ramble...]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 14:00:33 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404459&title=affairs#404459 <![CDATA[Affairs : They have developed a very deep...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404458&title=affairs#404458 Author: kebakat
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 1:59pm

They have developed a very deep friendship and he has become very attached as has she. She's apparently told him that if she had the guts to ditch the marriage she would love to be with him. But she's also said that she won't break the marriage up

I've heard that her hubby doesn't like this guy at all and they have had fights about her coming home late from work etc so I don't think that there is a common arrangement between them.

I think it's totally screwed up]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 13:59:55 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404458&title=affairs#404458 <![CDATA[Affairs : I tend to think that if he is...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404452&title=affairs#404452 Author: Parki
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 1:55pm

I tend to think that if he is single then he isn't actually doing anything 'wrong' as such.

Its her that is risking her marriage and deceiving someone....

Just my opinion.]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 13:55:57 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404452&title=affairs#404452 <![CDATA[Affairs : *throws cat amongst pidgeons* Perhaps...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404448&title=affairs#404448 Author: fattartsrock
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 1:55pm

*throws cat amongst pidgeons*

Perhaps the woman and her husband have an "agreement"? A couple who are very very good friends of mine have an "arrangement", its not common knowledge, however as they are very discrete, but they have an arrangement. It does involve alot of trust and honesty, but it works for them, I guess. Not for everyone, and not something I could do.

I don't think one is worse than the other, she has at least told him she is married. I guess the only ones who know the full story is the two of them, and maybe her husband. Not my cup of tea, though, but what goes on behind closed doors...

I personally don't think I coud forgive an affair, but I don't believe I have the right to judge others as I don't know the circumstances.. I'm not saying its right, but I'm not saying its wrong either, as I dont kow the situation.

Edited by fattartsrock]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 13:55:10 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404448&title=affairs#404448 <![CDATA[Affairs : I agree completely Stacey. ]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404434&title=affairs#404434 Author: nikkitheknitter
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 1:44pm

I agree completely Stacey.]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 13:44:33 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404434&title=affairs#404434 <![CDATA[Affairs : i could &#039;possibly&#039; excuse...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404430&title=affairs#404430 Author: jack_&_charli
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 1:42pm

i could 'possibly' excuse it once.....but to keep going back is plain naughty! ]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 13:42:49 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404430&title=affairs#404430 <![CDATA[Affairs : Bizzy wrote:i can see his motivation...with...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404426&title=affairs#404426 Author: CuriousG
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 1:40pm

Originally posted by Bizzy Bizzy wrote:

i can see his motivation...with a married women at least he knows she isnt going to want more from him.


I agree with Bizzy. While affairs mostly end badly, there must be some reason why they are having one. Have you asked him?

Edited by CuriousG]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 13:40:20 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404426&title=affairs#404426 <![CDATA[Affairs : Yep, agreed.. ]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404402&title=affairs#404402 Author: almostthere
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 1:27pm

Yep, agreed..]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 13:27:09 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404402&title=affairs#404402 <![CDATA[Affairs : i can see his motivation...with...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404401&title=affairs#404401 Author: Bizzy
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 1:24pm

i can see his motivation...with a married women at least he knows she isnt going to want more from him.
]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 13:24:40 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404401&title=affairs#404401 <![CDATA[Affairs : Yep, I agree with you also. ]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404398&title=affairs#404398 Author: AngieBabe
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 1:23pm

Yep, I agree with you also.]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 13:23:05 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404398&title=affairs#404398 <![CDATA[Affairs : yip Stacey I agree with you aswell,...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404375&title=affairs#404375 Author: blondie
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 1:13pm

yip Stacey I agree with you aswell, affaris hurt so many people when or if they get caught!]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 13:13:42 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404375&title=affairs#404375 <![CDATA[Affairs : I agree with you ]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404370&title=affairs#404370 Author: linda
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 1:09pm

I agree with you]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 13:09:39 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404370&title=affairs#404370 <![CDATA[Affairs : DH and I know someone who is being...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404368&title=affairs#404368 Author: kebakat
Subject: 17942
Posted: 05 June 2008 at 1:06pm

DH and I know someone who is being naughty at the mo and I wondered whether people thought my views of the situation are what you would think as well as mine and DH's views differ somewhat.

The guy we know is having casual sex with a married woman that he works with. He knows full well that she is married. He however is single.

I think that if he had no clue she was married and they were doing this then that would be fine morally on his part however he does know she is married. So I think that he is almost as bad as she for what they are doing. She's worse as she is breaking her vows but he's almost no better knowing he shouldn't be doing what he is.

Agree or disagree?]]> Thu, 05 Jun 2008 13:06:09 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17942&PID=404368&title=affairs#404368