Bizzy wrote: Theres an idea for you then jess, a Formula and bottle feeding support forum...

What a great idea Debs.... well your not just a pretty face after all

pepsi wrote: Much like people who write into the TV guide to complain about a show.. why not just change channels?

LMAO!!

I didnt read the other thread but may go have a look now.

but i feel as though everyone judges me because i didnt breast feed. I never felt comfortable doing it, in fact i hated it. Im just not a very good cow. But oh well. Frankly, i dont care whether anyone bf/ff. Up to you.

fattartsrock wrote: so can yu see how its helpful to just be straight up and say I'm not into it? saves us helpful people offending ya!

 

Totally agree

Mum2Lucas wrote: Lol pissy *snigger*

lol

emz wrote: . I'm very confused though why some people are confused why others are getting upset about the comments - it really pays to be so transparent about what you say as most of the posts you talk about can be taken many different ways. It's nice to have your educated opinions fattartsrock and kels. It doesn't mean, though, that others cannot make valid comments also as each case is individual. A parent knows their child best and shoiuld do what's best for them and also the mother. .

VEry trasparent posting here. Stand by everything I said.

I did not once say people couldnt make valid comments. I dont really think you have read what I have posted properly. AM I anti FF Emz??? Do I begrudge mums who FF right from birth or when ever they stop for whatever reason??? 

Kels wrote: The ads promote breastfeeding, well done who made them, very well put together.

tehehehe.....thats really all we needed to say isnt it

The ads promote breastfeeding, well done who made them, very well put together.

nzpiper wrote: Maybe one of the reasons FFers feel so sensitive and vulnerable is that they are making a HUGE decision about another persons wellbeing at a time when it is all so overwhelming.  There are just too many choices as a new mother and we need to cut ourselves and others some slack.....maybe then people who are having trouble can ask for help before feeling totally helpless and with no other options which seems to be how a lot of people felt early on.

cuppatea, that was the point I was trying to make.  There is help out there but at the time you just dont know where to look and its all so confusing, I imagine a lot of women give up in frustration.

And I bet our mums where just as bamboozled with advice back then too.  Oh the joys of motherhood. 

But I have LOVED this discussion......adult conversation rocks!!!!!

fattartsrock wrote: a plunket nurse. I am a BF counceller. We have seen and heard it all between us I am sure.

Must have missed this... Sure have luv, I guess thats where we get where each other is coming from IYKWIM... ROFLMAO.... dont even know if I did hahahaha

Groundhog post

I did not mean to make people feel their reasons for given up werent justified. I think any woman who gives up BF has that right without judgement whether medical reasons, or just b'cos as they have the right what I was saying is the people who liar about it.

WRX, I think that it is awful that you have had people say that to you. I had to give up because I went back to work and I found it hard to do both. I guess I am lucky not to have people say nasty things about it. I dont ever believe in asking anyone why they dont bf, go cloth, pain relief, names etc we all do what we think is best for us mothers and families

I had a mum tell me she hated it and I told her to stop, plain and simple. If she wasnt happy baby wouldnt be either. SHe stopped and is the happiest mother who is now trying to bond with her baby as she hadnt due to hating bfeeding.

fattartsrock wrote: WRX you need to read my post properly, all of them, where I have clarified what I meant to say. I am NOT CALLING YOU A LIAR or anyone, but I am stating that if you (meaning whopever it is choosing to ff) truely don't want to BF, then you should just have the balls to say that, instead of making up some excuse - and by that I don;t mean YOU are making up an excuse but lots of people feel they have to make up some "excuse" when really they just didn't want to BF. Which in itself is fine, just be honest. (not you, whoever is out there and has made up some lame excuse as to why they aren't BF) EMz I think made a point that I offended her by saying that people will run a mile when you say you chose to FF. I didn't mean that offensively, what I did mean was that people will quickly stop trying to "offer" (unwanted) advice if you just say you don't want to BF. Would you keep offering "advise" about TTC to someone who said outright that they didn't want to have Children instead of assuming they had none cos they couldn't???

Well said

Liz that was my trick at christmas...

I am not going to be made out to be the bad guy for voicing an opinion. I stand by all my post and again am not seeing myself as sitting in the bf frowning on ff.

emz wrote: I think you need to read both threads on this issue and then you will see where the comments are coming from. And possibly read the threads from another person's perspective too, not just your own. It would help a lot. As you will see from wrx's post above, these things have been said. Don't make it sound like people are making things up when they are actually coming from yourselves.

Maybe you need to read too, they are statements and not aimed at anyone here unless they choose to feel like that in which case has really got me wondering....

aimeejoy wrote: Kels wrote: nzpiper wrote: Oh, yeah and my profound thought wasnt so great after all. It was just throwing into the mix the fact the some poor bubs suffer more from BM than formula as they allergic to something Mum is eating and Mum cant work out what it is....now that would be stressful Emma had this with the gremlins, very sad and stressful Very very stressful!! This is the reason I stopped bfing both my girls (though Hannah at 11 months and Greer at 6 weeks) and I have no regrets or anything because I know I had to stop for their health, continuing to bf would only make them sicker. I have had no negative comments etc from anyone about FF. My opinion, is that if you know deep down that you gave BFing your best shot, you shouldnt be feeling guilty or whatever about it.

Aww hun allergies strike again. I think you did extremely well even trying to BF second time around with Greer. I think BF till any age is awesome and the fact that you did it till 6mths is great....

WRXandJosh wrote: No Fattartsrock stated If you didn't want to BF, at least have the balls to say so instead of making up excuses. and then you said AND for the record I am NOT anti FF what I am is anti liars, people who make up excuses to not BF and say blah blah for medical blah blah, then get shyty when BF things are around because it causes so much guilt for them. That implies those of us who dont want to say we didnt want to breastfeed are all liars. Im not saying i didnt want to BF when i really did. I dont make excuses i am flat out saying i couldnt get BF to work.

And there you go again putting yourself in the mix. Again please read, I didnt once say you were a person who could  BF but made up an excuse that you couldnt, stop playing the victim would you.

aimeejoy wrote: My opinion, is that if you know deep down that you gave BFing your best shot, you shouldnt be feeling guilty or whatever about it.

Absolutely.....but we are mums...its our job to feel guilty and we always will

Yeah I havent either NZpiper. Good debate

nzpiper wrote: Oh, yeah and my profound thought wasnt so great after all. It was just throwing into the mix the fact the some poor bubs suffer more from BM than formula as they allergic to something Mum is eating and Mum cant work out what it is....now that would be stressful

Emma had this with the gremlins, very sad and stressful

Mazzy wrote: I haven't seen anyone on here insulting or putting down FF mums either. I have seen people celebrating or talking up BF, but that's not the same thing. If someone takes that as insulting, then I think that's a personal issue - as someone else has already said, you are the only person who can make you feel guilty or bad. No-one else here wants to do that! Some people have stated that BF is medically proven to be a better food for baby (which it is, that's a proven fact) but that doesn't mean that formula is bad - it's not good versus evil here people!

here here mazzy

WRXandJosh wrote: Its comments referring to FF as liars because we say we cant breastfeed or get it to work that is why FFers feel like they have to have their backs up and exactly why emz said what she did. .

 

 I never oncesaid you were a liar or anyone on these boards, do not put words in my mouth trying to aim them at yourself, I simply said what I stand by which is I cant stand people who lie about having medically reasons which makes it harder for people who genuinly cant bfeed and then have negative experience with people passing awful judgements.

 read  and re read what I said again and you will see that not only do I support FF mums .. DOnt make this into a personal debate and dont even try and put words in my mouth. YOU JUST SAID IN YOUR POST  FF are liars.....UMMMM not sure what is up with that........

mum BF me and said she was unusual to do that.  That was in the 70s.

Another thought I had was...ah bum its gone (preggy brain).  hopefully I will remember...I think it was so profound that it will forever heal the rift between the 2 camps (ok maybe I am exagerating....but it was a goody.)

NZ piper I wasnt offended by what you said hehehehe

What is ans will keep ofending me is the irrational thought of people still trying to think BF a babies as a medical emergency and and a danger to both mum, baby or both as I said before. I know what you mean by trying to use it as an example of tho.

There are mums who generally cant bfeed, I should know, I WORK WITH THESE POOR MUMS WEEKLY including failure to thrive bubs and broken nipples, AGAIN I am just stating it is not a medical emergency, the babies arent going to die if I dont knock the mothers out, jam tubes down tthe infants throats and pour food into the guts............

I am very support of all my mums who FF which unfortunately is 95% of my mums but I am hoping that with the ads my mums will realise that there is another option that cannot be beaten and that is the norm. People who cant BFeed for medical reasons isnt 95% of woman it is 90 can, so encouragement with any form I am willing to back.

I have also never seen anyone put down or be nasty to any FF mums so I still dont understand the post insituating this

Kels wrote: Dont even get me started on the discrimination of having a c sect... it is alive and kicking, well was when I had DD1. I dont believe you can make comparisons to BF vs FF and VB and CS. My daughter was not breathing, had to insubated and given oxygen and rushed to neonates to keep her alive after being stuck in my pelvis trying to the huffa out. Now I tried as hard as I could to have her VB but her life was in danger. Deciding to breastfeed of FF wouldnt put her life in that much danger, she wouldnt have ended up in resus or neonates if I had chosen either way so IMHO def not a good comparison to make

Kels, I was never meaning to belittle the reasons for CS I was just trying to think of another big difference between mothers and thats the best I could come up with.  I think I was meaning noone cares that you had to have a CS.,...just that you are ok and your baby is ok...but people care how you feed your baby.  It intrigues me that the latter is the case.  I hope I didnt upset you.....I never meant to I guess I am not that good at getting my thoughts out the way I mean them (which is just curiosity at how people tick)

They are given drugs from GP to help with hormones changes (which you dont neccesarily have to do) as anyone could feed a baby long enough and milk would come in whether or not it was their baby. Breast are amazing things!!!!

She did described to me breastfeeding with a tube beside her nipple going into her babies mouth supplimenting the feed while her boobs woke up and done what they were designed to do . I found it all very fascinating as I had learnt it in class but never really thought about it beyond on paper IYKWIM.