Bobbie wrote: I meant to say as well if my child(ren) ever come home from a party complaining that they didn't get anything afterward they'll be told off for being ungrateful.

At the last party DS went to one of the kids mothers was waiting for him to go home and he asked where his party bag was.  I mean, they were sitting on the table and the kids had all seen them but still!  I have always told Z that if he gets something he is lucky but not to expect it, and it isnt his birthday it is his friends anyway. 

Yep goodie bags or party bags Honestly they are usually filled with plastic crap that the kids throw out or break anyway.  I HATE that kids expect something now when they go to a party For DSs last birthday party we just gave his friends a little bag of those choc coins from the warehouse, but really we had paid for them all to play laser tag and food and drink for everyone.  I would try and think of an alternative to the plastic rubbish, a balloon and a lollipop or something?