OHbaby! Forums : Would it be ok https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/ Copyright (c) 2006-2013 Web Wiz Forums - All Rights Reserved. Fri, 10 Apr 2026 19:20:31 +0000 Thu, 26 Feb 2009 08:57:21 +0000 http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss Web Wiz Forums 12.05 360 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/RSS_post_feed.asp?TID=24790 <![CDATA[OHbaby! Forums]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_images/web_wiz_forums.png https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/ <![CDATA[Would it be ok : Oooh, Peace, I really like that........]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=623231&title=would-it-be-ok#623231 Author: Jay_R
Subject: 24790
Posted: 26 February 2009 at 8:57am

Oooh, Peace, I really like that..... That is gorgeous, having the flame going the whole time ]]> Thu, 26 Feb 2009 08:57:21 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=623231&title=would-it-be-ok#623231 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : We had a remembrance candle that...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=623214&title=would-it-be-ok#623214 Author: Peace
Subject: 24790
Posted: 26 February 2009 at 8:30am

We had a remembrance candle that was lit at the beginning of our service in symbol of all the people who couldn't make it, as MIL had passed away and my family from Scotland couldn't make it (which was mentioned before we lit the candle). The candle was lit at the beginning of the service and sat alight up at the head table with us through the reception and dance. Sort of like their presence being like a burning flame.
]]> Thu, 26 Feb 2009 08:30:22 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=623214&title=would-it-be-ok#623214 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : Beautiful idea. . Any special...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=623146&title=would-it-be-ok#623146 Author: BabyOnBoard
Subject: 24790
Posted: 25 February 2009 at 10:35pm

Beautiful idea. . Any special occasions I have I always set out a seat with flowers infront of it for my sister, in rememberence of her.
What a lovely friend!]]> Wed, 25 Feb 2009 22:35:16 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=623146&title=would-it-be-ok#623146 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : Kelly - if it&#039;s important...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622601&title=would-it-be-ok#622601 Author: mum2paris
Subject: 24790
Posted: 25 February 2009 at 1:42pm

Kelly - if it's important to you then definately mention it.

we had a candle ceremony sort of.. at the beginning of the ceremony, my mum and my dad both lit a candle either side of a candleabra and the minister said about absent family members - specifically my two grandfathers who had passed away last november and august. we then later used those two candles half way through the ceremony and each grabbed one and lit the middle candle talking about unity etc. It made things very special and i felt that i needed to have mentioned my grandfathers as both were alive when we originally started planning our wedding, and had we not had to postpone it both would have been present for our day.

but yeah the toast for absent friends is also a good time to mention them too.

oooh and GOOOD LUCK!]]> Wed, 25 Feb 2009 13:42:11 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622601&title=would-it-be-ok#622601 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : I&#039;d def give your friend...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622360&title=would-it-be-ok#622360 Author: BuzzyBee
Subject: 24790
Posted: 25 February 2009 at 9:00am

I'd def give your friend a mention, it sounds like she was a huge part of your life - and still is! Nothing wrong with that at all hun

.....And OMG 3 days to go!!!!!]]> Wed, 25 Feb 2009 09:00:09 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622360&title=would-it-be-ok#622360 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : My best friend died at 18 and...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622356&title=would-it-be-ok#622356 Author: IVFGirl1111
Subject: 24790
Posted: 25 February 2009 at 8:58am

My best friend died at 18 and would have been my bridesmaid too - we had letters from when we were 13 with our signatures on it saying that we promise each other to be a bridesmaid!

When my Dad did his speech and toasted to absent friends, I asked him not to mention her in the end as I was pretty upset that she couldnt be there, I was hoping I wouldnt regret him not saying her name, but I didnt in the end thank goodness! But I say if you can handle it then yes do it!

What I did for my best friend was the night before the wedding I went round to her parents house and gave them her bridesmaid pack, they wernt home but I just left it at the door, then on the morning of our wedding I went down to the cemertary and put a bouquet of flowers on her grave - exactly the same as the bridesmaids.

Her parents came up to me after the wedding and we all cried together and then laughed and smiled about how she was with us etc.

Just an idea if you wanted to do something for your friend?

]]> Wed, 25 Feb 2009 08:58:24 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622356&title=would-it-be-ok#622356 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : Go for it. :) I stuck photos of...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622351&title=would-it-be-ok#622351 Author: flakesitchyfeet
Subject: 24790
Posted: 25 February 2009 at 8:52am

Go for it. :) I stuck photos of people who were desperately wanted at the wedding but weren't with us any more, with a single candle on a table in the entrance of our ceremony venue. Of course you are going to think about and want to acknowledge loved ones on this awesome day :)]]> Wed, 25 Feb 2009 08:52:34 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622351&title=would-it-be-ok#622351 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : Yep hun I would! Lovely thing...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622333&title=would-it-be-ok#622333 Author: pomikiwi
Subject: 24790
Posted: 25 February 2009 at 8:32am

Yep hun I would! Lovely thing to do ]]> Wed, 25 Feb 2009 08:32:54 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622333&title=would-it-be-ok#622333 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : we had a little memory table set...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622301&title=would-it-be-ok#622301 Author: Kazzle
Subject: 24790
Posted: 25 February 2009 at 7:59am

we had a little memory table set up just in front of our wedding table, with photos on there of friends and family who had passed, and we made a mention of them and how we felt blessed they were watching over us etc etc]]> Wed, 25 Feb 2009 07:59:43 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622301&title=would-it-be-ok#622301 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : not weird at all - we generally...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622293&title=would-it-be-ok#622293 Author: blondy
Subject: 24790
Posted: 25 February 2009 at 7:12am

not weird at all - we generally mentioned people that couldn't be with us at our wedding, but specifically named individuals that were very important to us - my Mum in particular, and we even had a candle burning all through the ceremony to represent her presence there.

and yikes on 3 days! ]]> Wed, 25 Feb 2009 07:12:52 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622293&title=would-it-be-ok#622293 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : yep a lovey idea kelly ]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622290&title=would-it-be-ok#622290 Author: james
Subject: 24790
Posted: 25 February 2009 at 6:55am

yep a lovey idea kelly ]]> Wed, 25 Feb 2009 06:55:40 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622290&title=would-it-be-ok#622290 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : Definitely not weird, I think...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622286&title=would-it-be-ok#622286 Author: kiwisj
Subject: 24790
Posted: 25 February 2009 at 1:08am

Definitely not weird, I think it's a lovely thing to do. Our celebrant mentioned my Grandad and DH's Nan in our service and DH spoke about them in his speech too.

BTW - 3 days to go!!! Exciting!!!!!!]]> Wed, 25 Feb 2009 01:08:41 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622286&title=would-it-be-ok#622286 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : Absolutely, and what everyone...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622274&title=would-it-be-ok#622274 Author: Snappy
Subject: 24790
Posted: 24 February 2009 at 10:47pm

Absolutely, and what everyone else said. We had the minister mention lost loved ones during our service just briefly.
Another thing I did was put my bouquet on my grandfathers grave the day after the wedding. DH put the bridesmaids ones on his aunts grave as well. It was just our way of including and acknowledging them. ]]> Tue, 24 Feb 2009 22:47:47 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622274&title=would-it-be-ok#622274 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : Absolutely meantion her. I meantioned...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622215&title=would-it-be-ok#622215 Author: AandCsmum
Subject: 24790
Posted: 24 February 2009 at 9:50pm

Absolutely meantion her. I meantioned my Grandpop even though he died 15 years before my wedding.

They make an impact on our lives & help shape us to be the people we are today & we carry their memory close in our hearts forever.

Huge congrats as well.]]> Tue, 24 Feb 2009 21:50:37 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622215&title=would-it-be-ok#622215 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : Thanks so much guys , I feel a...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622214&title=would-it-be-ok#622214 Author: caitlynsmygirl
Subject: 24790
Posted: 24 February 2009 at 9:50pm

Thanks so much guys , I feel a lot more reassured knowing that its not strange to do at a wedding .
Will also mention DFs best friend that drowned when they were 18 as well ]]> Tue, 24 Feb 2009 21:50:09 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622214&title=would-it-be-ok#622214 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : MamaPickle wrote:I absolutely...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622182&title=would-it-be-ok#622182 Author: Kels
Subject: 24790
Posted: 24 February 2009 at 9:29pm

Originally posted by MamaPickle MamaPickle wrote:

I absolutely think you should mention her.
She's important to you and deserves to be remembered on your special day

totally agree

]]> Tue, 24 Feb 2009 21:29:01 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622182&title=would-it-be-ok#622182 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : Definitely not weird ]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622171&title=would-it-be-ok#622171 Author: fire_engine
Subject: 24790
Posted: 24 February 2009 at 9:19pm

Definitely not weird]]> Tue, 24 Feb 2009 21:19:28 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622171&title=would-it-be-ok#622171 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : You definately should. ]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622169&title=would-it-be-ok#622169 Author: kellie
Subject: 24790
Posted: 24 February 2009 at 9:16pm

You definately should.]]> Tue, 24 Feb 2009 21:16:44 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622169&title=would-it-be-ok#622169 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : Yep in the toast to absent friends...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622162&title=would-it-be-ok#622162 Author: mummy_becks
Subject: 24790
Posted: 24 February 2009 at 9:12pm

Yep in the toast to absent friends get the person who is doing it to actually mention her and the relationship you have.

]]> Tue, 24 Feb 2009 21:12:23 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622162&title=would-it-be-ok#622162 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : Yup its definately the done thing...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622140&title=would-it-be-ok#622140 Author: caliandjack
Subject: 24790
Posted: 24 February 2009 at 8:50pm

Yup its definately the done thing these days, we did that as part of the speeches to my mum and others that have since died and couldn't be there.]]> Tue, 24 Feb 2009 20:50:03 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622140&title=would-it-be-ok#622140 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : I think it would be a lovely idea....]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622134&title=would-it-be-ok#622134 Author: littleLittle
Subject: 24790
Posted: 24 February 2009 at 8:48pm

I think it would be a lovely idea. She obviously meant a lot to you and the people at your wedding will know that so everyone will know that you're thinking of her on your special day.

There is usually mention at some stage of 'absent friends' and it's always kind of special when specific people get mentioned.

Congrats on the big day though! It's such a fun day and it definitely goes way too fast so make the most of it and enjoy every minute!!    ]]> Tue, 24 Feb 2009 20:48:14 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622134&title=would-it-be-ok#622134 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : Yep it sure is. Someone will...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622131&title=would-it-be-ok#622131 Author: Leish
Subject: 24790
Posted: 24 February 2009 at 8:44pm

Yep it sure is. Someone will usually do a speech/toast to absent friends which can include people important that have passed away. I think its a nice way to remember important people that have passed on before your special day. ]]> Tue, 24 Feb 2009 20:44:48 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622131&title=would-it-be-ok#622131 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : I absolutely think you should...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622130&title=would-it-be-ok#622130 Author: BugTeeny
Subject: 24790
Posted: 24 February 2009 at 8:44pm

I absolutely think you should mention her.
She's important to you and deserves to be remembered on your special day
]]> Tue, 24 Feb 2009 20:44:42 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622130&title=would-it-be-ok#622130 <![CDATA[Would it be ok : As most of you know my friend...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622125&title=would-it-be-ok#622125 Author: caitlynsmygirl
Subject: 24790
Posted: 24 February 2009 at 8:40pm

As most of you know my friend died from a blood clot 3 weeks after her daughter was born , it will be 2 years since she died on the 29th of June .
I grew up with her , knew her since I was 6 and as excited as I am about getting married in (eek ) 4 days , it breaks my heart that she wont be here as well , that and my grandma (who passed away 2 years on the 7th of March ) wont be there to see me get married .
The minister is mentioning my grandma in the service, but at some time during the wedding or reception Id like my friend mentioned too...would that be weird? my bestfriend and bridesmaid (who also grew up with her ) will be happy to do it , I just don't know if that sort of thing is mentioned ? ]]> Tue, 24 Feb 2009 20:40:53 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24790&PID=622125&title=would-it-be-ok#622125