https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/ Copyright (c) 2006-2013 Web Wiz Forums - All Rights Reserved. Sat, 11 Apr 2026 09:48:03 +0000 Fri, 01 Dec 2006 11:23:37 +0000 http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss Web Wiz Forums 12.05 360 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/RSS_post_feed.asp?TID=4664 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_images/web_wiz_forums.png https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/ https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90699&title=new-job#90699 Author: newmum
Subject: 4664
Posted: 01 December 2006 at 11:23am

I love Nelson!! I wouldn't want to move from there either! ]]> Fri, 01 Dec 2006 11:23:37 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90699&title=new-job#90699 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90671&title=new-job#90671 Author: ellabellame
Subject: 4664
Posted: 01 December 2006 at 9:45am

oh don't worry about it gsmum, i wasn't offended. i'm open to all opinions ]]> Fri, 01 Dec 2006 09:45:46 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90671&title=new-job#90671 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90531&title=new-job#90531 Author: Bizzy
Subject: 4664
Posted: 30 November 2006 at 7:49pm

just quietly i sometimes wish that my husband would get offered a job 3 hrs away....

ellabellame that is a lot of times to move - i prob would have said i'm staying here too if i'd had to move that many times...i didnt mean to sound harsh or anything but wanted to present the other point of view. ]]> Thu, 30 Nov 2006 19:49:35 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90531&title=new-job#90531 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90527&title=new-job#90527 Author: aimeejoy
Subject: 4664
Posted: 30 November 2006 at 7:38pm

Sounds like you two hae got it sorted Ella I can totally understand now why you want to stay (with all the other moves) and thats cool that he will come back if things arent working out. ]]> Thu, 30 Nov 2006 19:38:20 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90527&title=new-job#90527 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90517&title=new-job#90517 Author: ellabellame
Subject: 4664
Posted: 30 November 2006 at 7:05pm

gsmum - yes i've thought about that but i've also moved 4 times because of his job 3 of those times were with mikey and every time it's gotten harder and more disruptive for him. i thought it was time to let him settle down and get a bit of security back into his life.
sam has said that we'll try it and if it looks like it's going to cause to much hassle, either with his relationship with mikey or our relationship then he'll come straight back.
and i would never want him to think i didn't support him, he knows my reasons for not going and he understands so phew, lucky i've got an understanding partner ]]> Thu, 30 Nov 2006 19:05:55 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90517&title=new-job#90517 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90496&title=new-job#90496 Author: Bizzy
Subject: 4664
Posted: 30 November 2006 at 5:47pm

well if it was me - and i realise its not - i would just say bugger it, bite the bullet and go. i mean its not the end of the world and i can only imagine how hard it must be to work away from your family and feel that your wife/partner doesnt support you. men dont communicate well so we can only try and guess at how they really feel.

if it was reversed would you expect him to support you and live where you found the best opportunities.?]]> Thu, 30 Nov 2006 17:47:33 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90496&title=new-job#90496 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90467&title=new-job#90467 Author: Roksana
Subject: 4664
Posted: 30 November 2006 at 4:25pm

I agree with Liz about alone time with Hubby.

Atish lives in the same house as Me but we found that we have been always having small arguments and fights....we sat down once trying to understand why...then realised that since Zaara's birth we have never done any thing alone...just the two of us. Our lives revolve around Zaara and every thing we do we do with her...me more so than Atish. Atish had a few boys night out while I have never left Zaara to go any where (except work).

We decide that it is time to do some thing about it!!]]> Thu, 30 Nov 2006 16:25:09 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90467&title=new-job#90467 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90460&title=new-job#90460 Author: lizzle
Subject: 4664
Posted: 30 November 2006 at 3:58pm

I would give Sam some ideas to what him and Mikey can do together too. sometimes Dads get a bit stumped. Make sure he gets some time alone with Mikey when he comes back to "reconnect", that said, the most MOST important thing I can not stress enough - make sure you and Sam get some alone time - to reconnect and really tyalk - try and go out for dinnre or something - alone! Lewis and I didn't and we have been having major problems because of it. you really need that "us two" time if he is going to be away so much.]]> Thu, 30 Nov 2006 15:58:19 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90460&title=new-job#90460 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90448&title=new-job#90448 Author: Roksana
Subject: 4664
Posted: 30 November 2006 at 3:36pm

I read your thread before and didnt know what to say....I still dont!!

But thought I should let you know that we are sending you big hugs!!

As for Mikey (got the sp right this time) I am sure he will be fine...he is already one and remembers Dad well and 2.5 hours away is not that bad!!

It will be hard at first but if it means a better future for all of you then I guess it is worth it!!

]]> Thu, 30 Nov 2006 15:36:12 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90448&title=new-job#90448 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90434&title=new-job#90434 Author: ellabellame
Subject: 4664
Posted: 30 November 2006 at 2:57pm

i'm in nelson at the moment, reefton's about 2 1/2 hours drive away so it's not too bad.
but no, i wouldn't want to live on the coast again, it rains all the time and i can't go visit my family whenever i want.

i've sort of come to the realisation that this will be quite a good thing for us even though i'm going to miss him horribly. it's all sort of building towards the future.]]> Thu, 30 Nov 2006 14:57:14 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90434&title=new-job#90434 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90292&title=new-job#90292 Author: newmum
Subject: 4664
Posted: 30 November 2006 at 8:35am

aaargh, that sounds really hard!! I don't think I could handel Peter being away from us!! Where are you living now? Will it be far to come and go? Is Reefton really that bad? (sorry I haven't been to the west coast since I was about 6, hehehe)and is there no way he will talk to you about it? I think that is pretty crappy to just say he is taking the job without taking you guys into consideration!! ]]> Thu, 30 Nov 2006 08:35:35 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90292&title=new-job#90292 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90291&title=new-job#90291 Author: ellabellame
Subject: 4664
Posted: 30 November 2006 at 8:35am

oh we did discuss it, i made sure of that. but he did make me see that this is a really good opportunity. we can save heaps of money and then when we sell the house in greymouth we can buy one in nelson and live there for good. so it's really a positive step.

thanks liz, those are some really good ideas. i'll definitely be sending sam heaps of photos of mikey and he will be seeing him every week for afew days so hopefully mikey won't forget him.]]> Thu, 30 Nov 2006 08:35:34 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90291&title=new-job#90291 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90246&title=new-job#90246 Author: Bombshell
Subject: 4664
Posted: 29 November 2006 at 10:37pm

You mean he is going without taking you and the kids into consideration or discussing it??? You gotta be kidding me....
Sorry but thats not the way i work it!!]]> Wed, 29 Nov 2006 22:37:45 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90246&title=new-job#90246 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90167&title=new-job#90167 Author: lizzle
Subject: 4664
Posted: 29 November 2006 at 8:54pm

i was away from Lewis for a few months while firstly, waiting for Jake to get his visa, and then waiting for Lewis to finish his contract. I can say honestly that it is tough. I was living with my ,um while Lewis was away wehich made things heaps easier- although she worked. We got into a routine pretty quickly which helped with me feeling like a solo mum. I also tried to ensure we got out of the house every nice day we had. Do you have any coffee groups around? personally I have found my local playcentre group wonderful for some adult company!
As for Mikey missing his dad, that is tough. Jake asks now "where's dad?" all the time (dad is at work). We got a webcam and organised days for talking. I also emailed Lewis everyday with pictures and what the boys were up to. Lewis tried recording his voice reading some of Jake's favourite books too. didn't work, but good idea all the same.

I also had a book I made - one for Lewism, one for Jake, of phootos of them together. we looked at it each night and talked about where Daddy was, when he was coming home, and how much he loved Jake.

The big problem Lewis had, when he came back, it took Jake a while to "get used" to him again. He found that really tough as he ran to him, ready to give him a big hug, and Jake kinda freaked out at the airport and ran to me.]]> Wed, 29 Nov 2006 20:54:06 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90167&title=new-job#90167 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90165&title=new-job#90165 Author: aimeejoy
Subject: 4664
Posted: 29 November 2006 at 8:52pm

Oh Ella SOrry, I dont really know what to say either, but hopefully it will all work out. Just think of how nice it will be the days that you do get to spend together ]]> Wed, 29 Nov 2006 20:52:15 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90165&title=new-job#90165 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90158&title=new-job#90158 Author: nikkitheknitter
Subject: 4664
Posted: 29 November 2006 at 8:46pm

Oh that sucks! Hrmmm... have absolutely no advice to offer ya... but hugs through internet cables do instead? ]]> Wed, 29 Nov 2006 20:46:39 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90158&title=new-job#90158 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90072&title=new-job#90072 Author: ellabellame
Subject: 4664
Posted: 29 November 2006 at 4:11pm

Well, sams been offered a new job.....in reefton. i told him in no uncertain terms that i am not, repeat, am NOT moving back to the west coast but he says this is too good an opportunity to pass up. so he's going.
his roster means that he'll be working 7 days on, 3 days off then 7 days on, 4 days off. so really it's not that bad, it could be worse i guess. he'll only be away for a week at a time.

i know there are many mothers whose partners are away for much longer periods at a time but i still don't know how i'm going to manage being basically a single mum for that time, not to mention i'm going to miss him like crazy!!! i'm worried mikeys not going to know him anymore. at the moment, everything to mikey is dada this, dad that, he's crazy about his dada! if sam suddenly leaves mikey's going to be so sad.

sorry about the long whinge.]]> Wed, 29 Nov 2006 16:11:42 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4664&PID=90072&title=new-job#90072