OHbaby! Forums : is it nature or upbringing? https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/ Copyright (c) 2006-2013 Web Wiz Forums - All Rights Reserved. Thu, 30 Apr 2026 13:39:41 +0000 Mon, 07 May 2007 11:30:05 +0000 http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss Web Wiz Forums 12.05 360 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/RSS_post_feed.asp?TID=7272 <![CDATA[OHbaby! Forums]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_images/web_wiz_forums.png https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/ <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : I also think its both. My brother...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=141348&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#141348 Author: Roksana
Subject: 7272
Posted: 07 May 2007 at 11:30am

I also think its both. My brother and I are very different and think and behave very differently. And yet our parents did nothing different. I also believe that the environment we grow up in makes a difference. I grew up in Bangladesh, with very traditional family surronding me. I am therefore evry traditional. My brother grew up overseas and his thinking is very different.

Zaara is also very bratty! she does not like NO either.

Recently she is really bad (with a flu and molar coming out) I tell her NO Zaara dont do that...she put her head down and creams...then looks at me....Stop it Zaara...head down and scream again.....looks up at me....for gods sake zaara...head down scream....ok thats it I am ignoring you now.....head down scream and then 1 min later she is running around happy!!

Man I cant wait to see what she will do at 2!!]]> Mon, 07 May 2007 11:30:05 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=141348&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#141348 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : lol well i used to think it was...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=141227&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#141227 Author: AlyAyde
Subject: 7272
Posted: 07 May 2007 at 7:50am

lol well i used to think it was the way a child was brought up. BUT now that i have Jayde i think it is all nature.

Alyssa listens and is such a good girl. Then i have the little terror who will do exactly the oppisite you say just to piss you off. Man i tell you, lucky she is so cute. ]]> Mon, 07 May 2007 07:50:03 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=141227&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#141227 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : Im studying psychology at Uni...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=141206&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#141206 Author: bumblefoot
Subject: 7272
Posted: 06 May 2007 at 11:50pm

Im studying psychology at Uni this year and have always found the nature/nurture debate to be a fascinating one. Especially when I was nannying, I would wonder how a couple of kids from the same parents could be so different. And it really is a bunch of both.

Take for example a shy child, doesnt like to play by themselves, and is clingy to Mummy/Daddy. It could be said that this was just a nature thing, their parents were supportive, this is just a personality trait. But what if because the child is shy, the parents decide to cut out all the activites that they dont like? Like other kids, and having time away from the parents. Wouldnt this now bw a nurture issue?

Sorry if I have confused anyone, but this subject does interest me alot, for which reason i want to be a child psychologist someday.

So basically it is a melding of both nature and nurture, and cannot really be defined either way.

]]> Sun, 06 May 2007 23:50:52 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=141206&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#141206 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : tash is a very &#039;busy&#039;...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=141009&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#141009 Author: tashzmum
Subject: 7272
Posted: 06 May 2007 at 1:25pm

tash is a very 'busy' girl.she is pretty much on the go 24/7.
and i think her ears are painted on sometimes!!! although i do take the blame as i am rather soft on her and she is daddies lil princess. she is also very stubborn(like me!) and prefers to do her own thing.how she behaved on friday is pretty much how she is all the time but not as bad.

i think its both though for most kids...]]> Sun, 06 May 2007 13:25:55 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=141009&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#141009 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : ha ha Bombshell.. they always...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140888&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140888 Author: mum2paris
Subject: 7272
Posted: 05 May 2007 at 11:43pm

ha ha Bombshell.. they always behave wonderfully in the public eye when they get attention.. it's behind closed doors that they turn back into their interesting selves]]> Sat, 05 May 2007 23:43:05 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140888&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140888 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : RachandJack wrote:Also how...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140886&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140886 Author: Bizzy
Subject: 7272
Posted: 05 May 2007 at 11:24pm

Originally posted by RachandJack RachandJack wrote:

Also how do you define a naughty child? Just because they would rather run around than sit down and listen doesn't make them naughty.


i would agree with that. i try not to label the boys as naughty or say a particular behaviour is naughty either.

but if i say you have to stay here with mummy and they then run away is it becuase it is their nature to just explore regardless or is it lack of respect/boundaries/consequences that makes them disregard it.
    ]]> Sat, 05 May 2007 23:24:42 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140886&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140886 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : Even after all the chocolate that...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140881&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140881 Author: Maya
Subject: 7272
Posted: 05 May 2007 at 11:15pm

Even after all the chocolate that BSDH fed to Maya lol!]]> Sat, 05 May 2007 23:15:42 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140881&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140881 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : I disagree with you both Emma..and...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140859&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140859 Author: Bombshell
Subject: 7272
Posted: 05 May 2007 at 10:13pm

I disagree with you both Emma..and Deb - neither of you have brats...those kids were so well behaved sitting at a kids table and amusing themselves for sooo long and being sooo amasingly good!!! But we were the bad ones...we ignored them and left them to it and when they were bored thats when they started wandering and messing up the toys a little - it was their protest for us gaas bagging so long!!!

they were really very very good....and Toby running - well did he or did he wander and get lost....very scary and dont think even he knew what was going on!!!

hey after so many hours sitting in the car and then amusing themselves all the kids were incrdibly well behaved in my opinion...!!!]]> Sat, 05 May 2007 22:13:36 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140859&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140859 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : Shirena, I agree with you - but...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140832&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140832 Author: meow
Subject: 7272
Posted: 05 May 2007 at 8:53pm

Shirena, I agree with you - but have to say that when they are 2+ you sometimes have times when you can't actually figure out what is causing them to scream/throw a tantrum etc etc.. that's why it's called the terrible twos (although I've heard the threes are worse )]]> Sat, 05 May 2007 20:53:34 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140832&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140832 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : I have a brat . And you&#039;re...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140806&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140806 Author: Maya
Subject: 7272
Posted: 05 May 2007 at 8:12pm

I have a brat . And you're right, it's 100% nurture. She doesn't handle "no" very well, mostly coz she's pretty mcuh always gotten her own way ]]> Sat, 05 May 2007 20:12:21 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140806&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140806 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : You get naughty (which all kids...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140797&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140797 Author: SMoody
Subject: 7272
Posted: 05 May 2007 at 8:03pm

You get naughty (which all kids are to a degree) and then you get bratty behaviour. (dont think I need to explain the difference here, now do I? )

My father use to tell me we were as kids almost totally impossible. We had so much energy and living on a farm we use to shout and scream and run around wild, which was fine until we get into the city. Some people would have called us unruly, he called us being normal kids and just kids being kids.

Bratty behaviour to me is more due to nurturing than nature. Some extent it might be nature but they learn certain behaviour and they learn it more from the primary caregiver.

Now I am not saying if your child starts acting up it is totally the mothers fault but I usually try to sit back and think about it for a bit (when McKayla starts acting up more) and 99% of the time I can usually figure out what happened and it will be in relation to something that either happened in the family or what I did ect. Hope I am making sense here? ]]> Sat, 05 May 2007 20:03:05 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140797&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140797 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : RachandJack wrote:Also how...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140777&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140777 Author: meow
Subject: 7272
Posted: 05 May 2007 at 7:22pm

Originally posted by RachandJack RachandJack wrote:

Also how do you define a naughty child? Just because they would rather run around than sit down and listen doesn't make them naughty.


I'd call that free-spirited We have one of those here..always wriggling, jumping, bouncing, yelling etc etc.. but she's so cute too (and very intelligent )

Kids like to do the opposite of what you ask (well 2 & 3 year olds seem to ). You can instruct them on them things over and over and sometimes they still won't listen.. but then they surprise you with something like "mummy, I have to hold your hand on the road until I'm a bigger girl, don't I mummy" - and you know that they have secretly been listening all along ]]> Sat, 05 May 2007 19:22:24 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140777&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140777 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : I think that Supernanny shows...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140757&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140757 Author: miss
Subject: 7272
Posted: 05 May 2007 at 5:45pm

I think that Supernanny shows really 'naughty' children, and by how she fixes them up, shows that it is nurture to the largest degree.

i do believe that some things are definitely nature though, especially things like highly destructive psychotic elements (serial killers for example), but we aren't really talking about those sorts of kids! Lol
!]]> Sat, 05 May 2007 17:45:10 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140757&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140757 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : I also think it&#039;s both. Briona...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140734&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140734 Author: busymum
Subject: 7272
Posted: 05 May 2007 at 4:36pm

I also think it's both. Briona is by nature far more headstrong than my sweet Hannah and Krystiana looks like she might be the placid type (like Hannah) as well. But then there are kids who don't have consistent boundaries (and I think boys particularly struggle with this from what I've observed with my friend's kids) - it's like they spend half their time testing boundaries to check if they're there, and what will happen if they cross them. That's not to say that girls can't be naughty though ]]> Sat, 05 May 2007 16:36:59 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140734&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140734 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : eomachine wrote:I thought your...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140724&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140724 Author: Bizzy
Subject: 7272
Posted: 05 May 2007 at 3:45pm

Originally posted by eomachine eomachine wrote:

I thought your two boys were delightful! They weren't destructive or mean to other children. They seemed like really happy, cute, inquisitive little boys.



thanks...sometimes i think i could swap inquisitive for mindless obedience tho!]]> Sat, 05 May 2007 15:45:39 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140724&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140724 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : I thought your two boys were delightful!...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140719&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140719 Author: mamanee
Subject: 7272
Posted: 05 May 2007 at 3:34pm

I thought your two boys were delightful! They weren't destructive or mean to other children. They seemed like really happy, cute, inquisitive little boys.

]]> Sat, 05 May 2007 15:34:34 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140719&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140719 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : Also how do you define a naughty...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140683&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140683 Author: Rachael21
Subject: 7272
Posted: 05 May 2007 at 2:25pm

Also how do you define a naughty child? Just because they would rather run around than sit down and listen doesn't make them naughty. ]]> Sat, 05 May 2007 14:25:50 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140683&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140683 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : I&#039;m with the others... bit...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140669&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140669 Author: nikkitheknitter
Subject: 7272
Posted: 05 May 2007 at 2:09pm

I'm with the others... bit of both.

When Hannah isn't being particularly well-behaved, I can usually figure out something physiological that is going on with her to cause the behaviour.

But no idea where the escapist tendencies have come from... that'll probably my fault for raising a fairly independent child. Ah well, ya win some, ya lose some.]]> Sat, 05 May 2007 14:09:33 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140669&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140669 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : I think its a bit of both but...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140659&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140659 Author: BaAsKa
Subject: 7272
Posted: 05 May 2007 at 1:51pm

I think its a bit of both but mainly just in the personality for eg if you or DH were busy kids then your children may get that from you. I dont have a very busy child but my sister has a VERY! busy boy (1yr older than Bay) and we have raised our boys pretty much the same way which is why im inclined to say that its just in the nature ]]> Sat, 05 May 2007 13:51:30 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140659&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140659 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : I think of Jake as &#034;busy&#034;...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140652&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140652 Author: fattartsrock
Subject: 7272
Posted: 05 May 2007 at 1:37pm

I think of Jake as "busy" as well. He can be naughty, but mainly I think it is one of 2 things, frustration or reaction. When he purposely does something he knows he's not allowed to, he will watch you first with a wicked gleam in his eye for your reaction... gggrrr, like the squealing.

I definately think it is a bit of both, but in saying that, you can tell the difference between "busy and inquisitve/mischevious" naughty kids and kids who are naughty because no one puts boundries on them.]]> Sat, 05 May 2007 13:37:54 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140652&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140652 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : PS. I wouldn&#039;t describe your...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140649&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140649 Author: Maya
Subject: 7272
Posted: 05 May 2007 at 1:28pm

PS. I wouldn't describe your kids as badly behaved, just busy!]]> Sat, 05 May 2007 13:28:58 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140649&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140649 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : I think definitely a bit of both...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140648&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140648 Author: Maya
Subject: 7272
Posted: 05 May 2007 at 1:28pm

I think definitely a bit of both - you can't make a stubborn-natured energetic kid sit still for love nor money! Being one of four kids close in age it's really evident in our family. John was incredibly full on, go, go, go 24 hours a day, poor old Mum never got a break, yet Paul is a real Mummy's boy and would never go far from her. And they were/are both brought up the same way.]]> Sat, 05 May 2007 13:28:28 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140648&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140648 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : I think it&#039;s a little of...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140637&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140637 Author: mum2paris
Subject: 7272
Posted: 05 May 2007 at 12:57pm

I think it's a little of both. The way a child reacts to being taught all these things depends on what they are like, some take longer than others, and aheck of a lot more work..

Paris was easy as, cos she couldn't move for so darn long. but also cos she had the language skills etc and understanding. we have the holding an adults hand rule.. ie they hold someones hand or get stuck in the buggy/a trolley at a shop where there are trolleys. and also the "hand on the car" game for when we get to the car or are getting out. while waiting they have to have their hands on the car at all times. paris picked all this up soo easily.

Ayja, on the other hand is alot more stubborn and more work, but slowly she is picking it up because we have reminded paris that ayja learns from her so if we want ayja to do stuff then she will copy paris doing it.

Edited by mum2paris]]> Sat, 05 May 2007 12:57:02 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140637&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140637 <![CDATA[is it nature or upbringing? : so i was thinking after yesterday...]]> https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140628&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140628 Author: Bizzy
Subject: 7272
Posted: 05 May 2007 at 12:36pm

so i was thinking after yesterday and seeing well behaved kids and about how mine arent...

...do kids do as their told and not run away because it is in their nature or is it due to upbringing and bad parenting?]]> Sat, 05 May 2007 12:36:23 +0000 https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7272&PID=140628&title=is-it-nature-or-upbringing#140628