Domestic Violence!!!
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Forum Name: General Chat
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Topic: Domestic Violence!!!
Posted By: Mama2two
Subject: Domestic Violence!!!
Date Posted: 23 September 2007 at 11:55pm
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I am guessing that this is in response to all the awful things that have been happening recently, but I rung 111 tonight to report domestic violence happening at a house one away from ours and was very surprised and pleased to find out that we were the 4th call. Good on people for getting involved I say!!!
This particluar house is shocking for it, there is always yelling & screaming and banging going on, and there are atleast 2 little (under 5) kids in the house. And as normal it never starts till atleast 11 at night! I just feel really sorry for the kids  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Replies:
Posted By: MumsyMoo
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 12:10am
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It's so sad and really gut wrenching when that kinda thing happens.
So good to hear that there have been so many people concerned enough to have rung into the police though. I remember when all that kinda stuff would happen in our household, I just wished so badly that someone would be kind enough to call the police for us. (This is me as a child/teen witnessing it) With those situations there's really nothing you can do about it yourself, you just kinda have to hope and pray that someone will intervene - Otherwise you're just asking for more trouble - That I know from experience. Good on you for putting a call in  -------------  My wee girl is the love and light of my life!
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Posted By: james
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 7:15am
GOOD ON YOU FOR CALLING i would of aswell ------------- <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b4.lilypie.com/nLJ5p13.png" alt="Lilypie 4th Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a> |
Posted By: Glow
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 7:16am
 Obviously that is a regular thing at that house, but will it get to the root of their problems or will it create more problems for them..
I have anger & frustration problems & tend to raise my voice in the heat of a moment. Ive been doing anger management & frustrations stuff (im not really an angry person just a yeller, coz nobody listens LOL) Apparently even that is against the law these days.. 
We are going to be living in 1 crazy mixed up world were our kids have no boundaries & parents go to jail for disciplining, coz people think the know & not the right help is given to them 
What next, government telling us what to feed our kids & how to dress them?
... just my fcw ------------- Mummy of Two Boys B: 2004 K: 2007 |
Posted By: buzimumto3boys
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 7:32am
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Yay for ringing!!
Hope the cops did something about it!! |
Posted By: Mama2two
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 7:33am
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Glow, you are right, the police know this address very well.
In saying that this is the first time I have rung as this was well past yelling. One of the women living there was being beaten up quite badly by another another couple of the women, one of them was using a baseball bat. (I think about 6 people + kids seem to live in a 3 bdrm house?). It turned out the police arrived just in the nick of time and the one that was being beaten was very relieved to see them. They arrested the two that did the damage and had to take the 3rd to hospital by ambulance. 
I am actually relieved to hear that this particular house has just been put up for mortgagee sale so hopefully these neighbours will be moving out soon. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 8:47am
| i don't like the comment "will it get to the root of the problem or cause more problemns for them" - I'm sorry, but if I can hear someone getting beaten up, or whatever, my thought is going to be for the safety pf the children, not "oh, i wonder if this will cause them more problems". |
Posted By: Glow
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 8:57am
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Ok... how can you make a law & not have things put in place for those kind of people to go to? Where do they go instead & at what level is their problem? Will they get the help the really need or will the just get discriminated against put in jail & our tax money wasted? No it might not cause them more problems but our country YES!!
Just like the innocent people who get charged for crimes the diddnt really commit. Not the case in the case however..... Ive seen some shocking schitt because of this stupid so called law & you know what no matter the law people are always going to break it
------------- Mummy of Two Boys B: 2004 K: 2007 |
Posted By: nictoddie
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 9:14am
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I hear what your saying glow, but I'd also call 111 if I heard someone being beaten up, and it prob won't solve the problem but if there are kids involved I think something needs to be done. ------------- 
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 9:31am
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Sorry I can't agree with you Glow. If someone is committing a criminal act, then they should face the consiquences of their actions.
If a stranger came up and assaulted you you'd press charges, why should domestic violence be any different. The trouble is the Police can only step in when a crime has been committed, which is often too late. Its great to see that people are calling 111, better to do that and nothing be wrong, than not and someone gets hurt or worse killed. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">   [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: minik8e
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 9:34am
| I think what Glow means is that ok, it might help the safety of the children right THEN, but in the majority of cases, the after effects actually make it less safe for the children in the long run - accused getting angrier because Police are involved so taking it out even worse on the victims when they are out of the cells/jail. I agree in some part with Glow, although I also would ring 111. |
Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 9:47am
Don't you think thats the kinda thinking that keeps women in abusive and violent relationships? Cause they're too scared to call the cops or tell anyone, cause she'll get hurt worse. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
minik8e wrote:Posted By: minik8e
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 10:04am
| Yes, it is fleury. However, as Glow was saying, it's no good just calling 111 unless there is a system in place to follow it up to CHANGE that style of thinking, for both victim and accused. Usually by that time, the victims have little to no self esteem left and therefore don't believe they deserve better - calling the Police isn't going to change that. Also, the support given to the accused can at times be non-existent - so even if that particular victim does get the courage to up and leave, the accused doesn't get the support needed to change their own actions, and then the cycle continues, with another victim. |
Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 10:09am
| so then Glow, you are saying that when we hear something happening, we should not ring 111 as it could cause more problems? is this what you mean? |
Posted By: buzimumto3boys
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 10:11am
Sounds like there is alot of the violence happening now... its meant to get worse towards xmas isnt it?? Eeek!
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Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 10:37am
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OK so I can see both sides of the story here, and whilst I agree to a certain degree that we all have an obligation to call the police in a situation where someone else is being hurt, I can see what Glow is saying and she makes some very valid points, and I agree 100% with what Minik8 says.
Having been in an abusive relationship, I know that anytime anyone else tried to intervene it *did* make things worse. Things got so bad that my friends weren't allowed to come inside the house and had to sit outside on the front stairs if they came to visit, and I was only allowed to leave the house with him. I think what you're saying Fleury is right, that fear keeps women in violent relationships, but that's a bit simplistic in itself, there are a whole bunch of other factors in play as well. I'm reasonably intelligent (I like to think so anyway) and well educated, and yet I let myself be subjected to violence partly because of fear and his threats to kill me if I left, but also because I believed at the time that I loved him and he loved me, that he would change, that every time he hit me would be the last, that if I made sure he had enough weed he'd be mellow and wouldn't flip out, that no one else would ever love me etc. etc. etc. The emotional abuse is far, far, far worse than the physical stuff, the bruises etc. heal but the psychological stuff is still with me even now, in fact when Willie and I first got together I once attacked him in my sleep because I was having a nightmare about my abusive ex. Getting out of an abusive relationship is hard, I can only imagine how much harder it is when you have kids, and I also know from experience after I left Willie when I was pregnant with Maya that womens refuges are drastically underfunded and under resourced (and just to clarify he has NEVER been abusive, I just didn't have anywhere else to go). We need to be able to empower women from very early on in their lives not to get themselves into these relationships, and the only way to do that is by providing support for their MOTHERS to get out of abusive relationships and breaking the cycle. But would I call 111 if I heard someone being beaten up? ABSOLUTELY! No question about it! Yes in the short term it might make things worse, and she might go back to the abusive relationship the very next day, but the more people that you involve, the more opportunities you give someone to get out, the more chance there is that they will take one of those opportunities and make a break. ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: james
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 10:48am
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yep tottaly agree with emma havin been in a metaly abuise reliship lucky i relised wht was going on before it could get wrose yep i would ring the cops you never know it might be the one time to get away ------------- <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b4.lilypie.com/nLJ5p13.png" alt="Lilypie 4th Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a> |
Posted By: Glow
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 11:43am
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Depends... what we hear may not be the root of the problem
Of course Id ring the police if i knew the story & the background info & was witnessing the act. Not just coz i got a nose on my face. I believe women stay in abusive relationships because the are to scared of what people may think & say & it sucks when you tell someone & they dont believe you? People are evil!!!
I get help for being a victim of many, many things but its still hasnt reached the root of my problems... Physically, emotionally mentally abused my whole life form the day i was born. But know me before you judge me!! Discrimination sucks!! WE are all victims of something We learn & grow everyday!! ------------- Mummy of Two Boys B: 2004 K: 2007 |
Posted By: Rachael21
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 12:17pm
| I agree with glow that something really needs to be done to help the people with the anger problems but I think that the victims need to be taken care of first. |
Posted By: Snappy
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 12:27pm
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i had to call the cops on my neighbours on saturday night. They have a newborn baby and are always argueing.
i thought there was an earthquake but it was in fact her trying to get back into the house (we are in a flat which is connected) he'd locked her out! i was worried that when the cops turned up she was fob them off but she was quite happily telling them to take him away! Hed pushed her down the stairs because she hadnt drained the rice properly! (yes, i left my bedroom window open so i could hear everything!) 2 weeks ago the boyfriends parents turned up after another arguement and he locked the baby in the car and told his parents to drive away, she was absolutley beside herself. Im just going to keep calling the cops. They interupt my sleep and quite frankly she can be as bad to him as he is to her. |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 12:43pm
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Our neighbours here are bad too, but it's not him it's her. I've never heard any physical fighting but you should hear the abuse and obscenities she screams at him. And they have no shame, she stands in the doorway and hollers at him up the driveway in front of all the neighbours. ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: Snappy
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 1:49pm
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sounds like my neighbours :)
one time they were argueing outside our door, he was calling her some not very nice things, and when she retaliated someone down the road yelled at her to be quiet etc.. and then the BF ended up yelling at THEM and telling THEM not to disrespect his MRS!!!!! they both ended up chasing them down the street while leaving the newborn baby screaming inside. Thats why i never get involved, they are nutters! |
Posted By: MummyFreckle
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 2:09pm
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There are lots of support mechanisms in place for the victims of Domestic Violence, and it is my understanding that the police do provide them with the information about how to access this support if they want to. Its also my understanding that there are support mechanisms in place for the offenders if they choose to access these or not is up to them. People will only get help if they want to I guess..... I know that a lot of victims of DV stay in the situation because they dont feel that they can leave - or that they deserve any better, but I dont think that anyone can use the excuse that there is "no support" for them out there. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: MummyFreckle
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 2:14pm
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Glow - I can see where you are coming from, BUT I think that your view that calling the police = being nosey is just plain WRONG. If you saw a complete stranger being stabbed - would you call the cops? If you saw a bank robber running out of a bank with a bag of money would you call the cops? Does it matter that you dont know the "background" or the story. There are NO excuses for domestic violence - it is NOT okay, in any circumstances, and I think that if people have that opinion then the community will continue to turn a "blind eye" to this behaviour. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 2:24pm
| i agree Simsam. i think that not calling the police because we don't knwo the full story is ridiculous. I do agree that there isn't enough support for victims of domestic violence nor is there enough support for those people trying to break the cycle with anger management etc, but I don;t think it bears any relation for making a decision whether or not to call 111. in my opinion it is then up to the police to find out the background story. |
Posted By: Glow
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 2:25pm
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Umm & have you been told to get over it? & thats a load of schitt!! Have you been all over to ask & still you get told this & that & get cut open for all sorts of things?
Do you really know what goes on behind closed doors? Do you live down my street!!?? Have there been murders & suicides & stuff where you live?? For example on Friday Morning at 9.10am I rang for support coz i was loosing it. I was given another number by a freggin machine & when i called that number there was another machine!! So yea dont assume anything coz YOU just might make an ass out of YOU & me!!
BTW what happens to people that break the new laws??? Or even the innocent people that *other* people thought were? ------------- Mummy of Two Boys B: 2004 K: 2007 |
Posted By: Glow
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 2:35pm
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Umm... i never once said not to call the police & thought that was a great thing for Sterryn to do. Only she knows!!!
Just opened you up to the otherside... Scary eh!!! ------------- Mummy of Two Boys B: 2004 K: 2007 |
Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 3:18pm
| actually am fully aware of "what can happen behind closed doors" due to situations I chose not to chat about, however I don't and didn't like the implication of this thread that Sterryn should have found out what was going on before calling 111. I agree with the points made about lack of support, and more preventative measures needed however, i don't think this is the thread to be saying those kinda things as whether or not you meant it, it does give the impression you were saying not to call 111. |
Posted By: MummyFreckle
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 3:22pm
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I agree Lizzle - thats certainly the impression that I got too. I think that surely the police would rather you called them and it turned out to be nothing than to not call them at all! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Glow
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 3:38pm
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Very impressionable then aint ya!!
Whats the point in wasting $$$ when there are people out there that do need help, ask for it & dont get it!! Sterryn also said she was the 4th call about the same house the same night in her 1st post!!! What about all the unnecessary bullschitt? Re Other incidents!! The Police dont care the government pays them & always will(from what?!!) ------------- Mummy of Two Boys B: 2004 K: 2007 |
Posted By: Glow
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 4:05pm
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What about the shamelss neighbours of Emma & Kylie & co. Who has the biggest problem there & will they really get the help they need???!!! ------------- Mummy of Two Boys B: 2004 K: 2007 |
Posted By: MummyFreckle
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 4:18pm
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I am choosing to bow out of this conversation now - I think that we have some fundamental differences of opinion and dont want to get into a battle over who is right and who is wrong here. Everyone is entitled to their opinion and to be honest - if I carry on posting here, I am bound to say something that will offend someone and then I will be the one that will be "in the wrong". So consider me out of this now.
------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Glow
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 4:26pm
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People express their opinions & get dissed for it
To avoid criticism, be nothing, say nothing, do nothing- we'd have a very boring life wouldnt we!!! ------------- Mummy of Two Boys B: 2004 K: 2007 |
Posted By: Kels
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 4:59pm
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Good on you Sherryn for calling the police. I have called them many times on my neighbours and will continue to call the police each and everytime I hear domestic violence of any sort. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs |
Posted By: Chovynz
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 6:08pm
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Glow you're stirring just for the sake of it.
Sterryn: good job I say. Maybe if one by one we all stick up for the people who are too afraid / hurt / can't help themselves...then maybe one day this world will be a better place. ------------- Defending the male species since 1980 
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Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 6:10pm
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i dont want to get into an argument either im just stating my opinion, id call the police, whether i knew the background or not, thats just me, cos its what ive been brought up to do,it sux that often those that ask for it dont get help like you say glow, but i think someone needs to speak up for those that dont,unfortunatley i do get what your saying about making it worse, but i think in these situations its a risk you have to take (i know how blaise that sounds,but cant think of another way to put it) in the chance that a positive outcome may occur.
This thread obviously hits close to home for you glow, i hope your not feeling too upset chick |
Posted By: Glow
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 6:23pm
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Chovy- I dont stir, i mix (in a bowl)!!!
Kelly- Im all good on this thanks. Im bigger than this & confront it face on. But i also think before i act -DOH!! ------------- Mummy of Two Boys B: 2004 K: 2007 |
Posted By: Glow
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 6:37pm
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Some people have taken what ive said the wrong way. So...
P>S I never said it wasnt OK to call the cops in relation to DV. I never said anything about Nosey being wrong. I just made ya think didnt I.... I said what i said, coz i know first hand- on both sides of the fence. Do you??!! What i dont like is when people take things the wrong way & blow things out of proportion. Maybe its my turn to blow things outta here!!! ------------- Mummy of Two Boys B: 2004 K: 2007 |
Posted By: Chovynz
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 6:58pm
I think you'd be surprised how many people actually do know. It's one of reasons WHY I'd call the cops. I've been there. ------------- Defending the male species since 1980
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Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 7:11pm
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DV is all too common in NZ and actually most of us have either been involved or been close to someone else who has been involved. Glow we're not advocating calling the cops every time the neighbours yell at each other but if things sound seriously out of control it is far better to call the cops and make sure everything is ok than to not call them and find out something serious happened later. Generally in DV time is of the essence.
Glow I think you're being a bit rude. Yes, Sterryn was the 4th or 5th person to call but that just goes to show how serious the DV seemed to be, to more than just her. But remember that she didn't know the others had already called until after she rang! This is what the Police are trained and paid to do, so I say well done to anyone who hears something sounding like DV and calls the cops to make sure it's all ok. Sometimes the couple want to be left to sort it out, in which case I'm sure they'll let the cops know! But it's not always that way. ------------- |
Posted By: Leish
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 7:29pm
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This just reminded me of little Nia and what was going on with her at her home and how people - in this forum too - asked, why didn't the neighbours do anything. We asked how people could sit in their homes when something so obvious was going on in their very neighbourhood and not do anything and then a little innocent baby girl died.
I take my hat off to you Sterryn and totally think you did the right thing and I would have done exactly the same. If someone had done the same thing for baby Nia... ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Mazzy
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 7:31pm
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Good on you Sterryn for calling, the injured woman will be thanking you (and the other three neighbours) for it.
Emma, thanks for sharing in your post, I thought it was really well thought out and well said. Ditto for others who have contributed to this topic, it's thought provoking, if turning a little controversial! I don't think you can ever know what people have experience of based on what they say in an internet forum, I'm sure that many people on here have drawn their conclusions from their own experiences and for their own reasons. I for one am not making any assumptions about why or what anyone says here. My two cents (without wanting to stir, just writing my thoughts!) - as a community (and I am aware that 'community' is a rare commodity these days) I think it is essential that violence is not tolerated, in any form. Therefore what Sterryn did, and what anyone else has done/will do to report or stop violence happening around them is a good thing. I also agree there needs to be more happening than the immediate reaction to stopping domestic violence. There are some support networks out there but I think they are generally underfunded or inconsistent in different areas of the country. I also think that in order to get to the root of whatever personal problem or issue is causing a lot of domestic violence, the individual or individuals involved have to have some investment in wanting to change, and that is not always the case. You are the only one who can change your behaviour, but again there needs to be support to help those who do want to change. That said, I also believe that it is important for family and community to be providing that support as much as government or other organisations. We are responsible for our society. But I'm also aware that this is an idealistic situation that isn't reality in most cases. Glow, I do find your posts hard to read because the tone doesn't sound right to me, but I will try harder to not read so much into them - my problem more than yours I think! One question - what are the new laws you are talking about? ------------- Mum to two gorgeous girls! |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 8:01pm
I was just going to quote the part of your post that I've highlighted Mazzy, but when it comes down to it I agree with everything you've said. In particular tho the bit I've highlighted, I think people DO have to have some investment in change. It's been nearly 9 years since I got out of an abusive relationship and I came out of it with the skills and determination to avoid ever getting myself in that situation again. My ex on the other hand had absolutely no interest in changing himself, he has a new partner and a daughter a little younger than Maya and they have regular punch up sessions. I also agree that services are inconsistent around the country, it's the same with any kind of health/support services, it all depends where you live. Eg. If you live in Waikato DHB's catchment area and have an unsettled baby you have access to the live-in program at Mothercare, if you live in AK DHB's catchment area you get nothing. Oh and I *think* the laws Glow is referring to are the new anti-smacking laws. Correct me if I'm wrong Glow? ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: Glow
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 8:19pm
fcw means fifty cents in my language sorry for my grammar & emo like elmo emotions. No im not rude!! My view was that this is a crazy mixed up world were the government dont even know what they are doing coz of MMP
Can you see my emotion & if you dont believe.. go back & look at the post first hand it aint been edited??? Yep Kelly hit the nail on the head about how close to home this is for me. Infact i can even say i have given & recived some sort of violence. Family Violence!!! I know from my past that i need to deal with MY stuff. Tis my prob & i do deal with it everyday OK & what are the current adds about mental illness & DV portraiting to you??? What about the yellow pages add with that very brain washing music? What about the BK add??? Can you see me smiling coz yep everybody cries on the inside!!
ETA another And say how can anyone hurt anyone, anyhow?? Old people, homo's etc?? Sexuality & race???? Because people are different? ------------- Mummy of Two Boys B: 2004 K: 2007 |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 8:27pm
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You are a complex individual Glow, I find your posts interesting, if sometimes a little confusing! You make me think ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: Mazzy
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 8:37pm
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I'm just confused
Time for bed soon obviously! If it was the new anti-smacking laws, I think they are ineffective either way. They won't stop domestic violence but I think it's a bit of a push to say that people will be arrested for smacking their kids..although I haven't read the actual law myself. From what I understand it was changed to be more along the lines of removing the loophole for people to get away with beating their kids using 'reasonable force'. To me, saying it will cause innocent people who don't harm thier children to be thrown in jail (a line I constantly hear used by those against the law change) is an exaggeration for shock value. Call me naive if you want, I just think there's been a bit of a broohaha around this law and it's an arguement that has been done to death. ------------- Mum to two gorgeous girls! |
Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 8:55pm
| I am now bowing out of this, as not sure what is going on, and can;'t be arsed figuring it out. |
Posted By: Mazzy
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 9:05pm
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Yeah, me too. I think I started off well but anything else I've added is a little addled. Definitely time for bed...bowing out. ------------- Mum to two gorgeous girls! |
Posted By: Glow
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 10:34pm
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For me... i know innocent people who have been to court already because of this stupid anti-smaking bullschitt & nosey people who thought they knew... *nothing* Now that was a waste of time wasnt it!!!
------------- Mummy of Two Boys B: 2004 K: 2007 |
Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 24 September 2007 at 11:37pm
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its a pity your bowing out mazzy,because i have to say i thought your post was one of the most well written,well thought out posts ive ever read on here.
And emma,as mazzy said thankyou for sharing your story, it too (as always with your posts) was very well written and intelligent,and its never easy talking about personal stuff like that, but you were clearly saying it to make emphasise your points with some experience facts, without asking for sympathy,it shows me how much youve achieved and i admire you very much. well done the both of you
(gosh i sound like a kiss ar*e lol) |
Posted By: Jennz
Date Posted: 25 September 2007 at 12:50am
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I have lived such a ridiculously sheltered life- the strength you guys must have to make it out of that cycle is amazing.
Well done for making that call. I think we all need to be a little more nosey- its this loss of community that are making cases like baby Nias such a common occurance. Numerous woman are killed by their violent partners every year because people aren't being nosey enough. We should all be looking out for each other. I would rather have a visit from the cops because someone was concerned about something going on and it be nothing than if I or my children were being harmed and no one called for want of being too nosey. ------------- Jen, Charlotte 7 & Kate 3 
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Posted By: Anna
Date Posted: 25 September 2007 at 7:17am
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Sterryn, I think you did a great thing. I would absolutely call the cops if I thought someone was being hurt or needed help.
Glow, your posts confuse me. Do you think that in a similar situation someone should not get involved? I do not believe that anyone innocent has been sucessfully prosecuted with the anti smacking bill, but then again I guess my view could be considered distorted as Andy is a cop. "just MY fcw" ------------- Anna http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Glow
Date Posted: 25 September 2007 at 7:18am
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WE are loosin community because people put themselves into groups/classes & cant tolerate *other people*
Its called discrimnation. How can we not have community in a small country like NZ??? I hate seeing $$$$ & time wasted. Hence i said what i said based on my life experinces Police cant do anything until the law has been broken!! So what do the do in the mean time? Waste time & $$$$ on *some* pointless schitt I like what you said Mazzy coz its all true!! ------------- Mummy of Two Boys B: 2004 K: 2007 |
Posted By: Glow
Date Posted: 25 September 2007 at 7:27am
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Once again i did not say what you think i said!!!
You probably think that coz im different & was brought up with another language- hence i dont relate well to a language with words that have many meanings & how & what you write could mean different things. Believe what you wana believe coz our NZ history has been sanitised in a big way!!! Thanks MinK8 for just knowing what i know & understanding ------------- Mummy of Two Boys B: 2004 K: 2007 |
Posted By: minik8e
Date Posted: 25 September 2007 at 9:25am
| No worries Glow - have seen it firsthand, and been there, so I know what you mean. |