Rant: Why do people judge others...
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: General Chat
Forum Name: General Chat
Forum Description: For mums, dads, parents-to-be, grandparents, friends -- you name it! And you name the topic you want to chat about!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=11422
Printed Date: 30 September 2025 at 9:06pm
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Topic: Rant: Why do people judge others...
Posted By: FionaS
Subject: Rant: Why do people judge others...
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 2:21pm
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...when they don't really even know them?
I've been really frustrated lately seeing how much people, especially mothers judge one another. There is nothing more undermining to a friendship that the feeling you are being judged. I know we all have automatic judgemental thoughts in our heads about others from time to time but why do we act on them and gossip / draw conclusions about others when we don't even have full information? What ever happened to "do unto others as you'd have them do unto you" & supporting one another? Why do we have to squash others down so much? Sorry - just a rant but it is so sad and annoying! Does it bother you too? ------------- Mummy to Gabrielle and Ashley |
Replies:
Posted By: Glow
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 2:29pm
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Meh- to hell with gossip & judgement
To avoid it.. be nothing, say nothing, do nothing!! Obviously their lives are VERY VERY boring http://www.imagesfly.com/viewer.php?id=49933f0810.jpg"> 
http://www.imagesfly.com/viewer.php?id=67395f2701.gif">  ------------- Mummy of Two Boys B: 2004 K: 2007 |
Posted By: james
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 2:29pm
yep it borthers me to but people do it to make themselfs feel better about there seleves  ------------- <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b4.lilypie.com/nLJ5p13.png" alt="Lilypie 4th Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a> |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 2:34pm
*feeling very guilty now*  -------------  Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: FionaS
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 2:35pm
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Not you Emma!!! LOL ------------- Mummy to Gabrielle and Ashley |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 2:36pm
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I know, but it's me that made you feel bad ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: FionaS
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 2:41pm
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Na, it's been something that has been bugging me for a while, just a general observation. ------------- Mummy to Gabrielle and Ashley |
Posted By: my2angels
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 2:51pm
| Im lost, again obviously something I havent seen but anyway I agree and hope its not me that you have in mind! |
Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 2:59pm
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my2angels i dont think its specifically board related...
its human nature tho fiona...what i hate more tho is mums who compare kids in front of the kids...ggrrr but yeah i sometimes wonder what is being said about me behind my back... you have to be the duck tho - and let it all slide off like water from a ducks back!!!! |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 3:09pm
We all talk about how lovely and not-grumpy you are   ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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GandT wrote:Posted By: FionaS
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 3:10pm
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my2angels....it's definately not about anything on Oh! Baby or about any one situation or person...it is a general observation :)
I can deal with it aimed at me (kind of) but don't like seeing it happen to others, especially when they are struggling and in need of support. Definately just a general, non-specific rant. ------------- Mummy to Gabrielle and Ashley |
Posted By: Glow
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 3:24pm
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Some people get more schitt thrown at them through life than others.
Some people are rumour spreaders & jealous Some people have more in life than others... ------------- Mummy of Two Boys B: 2004 K: 2007 |
Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 3:37pm
| I have tried not to judge - after being really judgemental pre-kids "MY child won't watch that much tv" "MY child won't scream like that in a supermarket" "Oh my gosh, she's given her child a lollipop - MY child won't eat lollipops - they'll only eat fruit and like it". now when i see mums in the supermarket with three kids who are screaming "we want..." and she hands them it and says "HERE!!!", i smile sympathetically. |
Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 3:38pm
yeah now i know you aint telling the truth.. cheeky!
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Posted By: meow
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 3:39pm
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Yeah I've seen it too, and have experienced it. I have found alot of older mums tend to judge because they seem to think they know it all.
I've grown some tough skin over the past few years so I can take it now.. if someone wants to gossip about me then fine, it's them that has the problem ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: meow
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 3:41pm
I smile at mums now too, and usually say something like "we get that here too" and they'll usually reply.. I just hope I'm helping by letting them know they're not alone. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 3:42pm
uhuh! Now i realise how naive i was before the kids...but i still say things like "when my kids are older they wont do that". i think at some stage we all judge other mums but generally it is ones we dont know but see briefly like in the supermarket etc. What i hate is when people act like they are your friends but in fact their words to others tell a very different story! |
Posted By: FionaS
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 3:50pm
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I do understand that having judgemental thoughts is a natural part of human nature but focussing on them and discussing them with others just leads to an overall sense of negativity.
BTW, I am definately not suggesting that I am free from judgemental thoughts and words...I just wish it wasn't something that is so common. ------------- Mummy to Gabrielle and Ashley |
Posted By: cuppatea
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 4:30pm
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Cos they have nothing else better to do with their time.
I'm not sure whether it is just cos I am more sensitive since having a baby but I do find mums extremely judgemental. Like you said before it seems that instead of supporting each other we are judging each other. I also get really annoyed when people talk behind others backs. I had a boss who would sl*g off everyone to me and all I use to think is what is he saying about me to everyone? I'm sure one day he will be sl*gging someone off and then realise that that person is the one he is talking to! ------------- 
 
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Posted By: jaz
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 4:40pm
The best parents in the world are the ones that don't have any kids!!! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Tiff
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 4:49pm
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It's definately one thing to think it but you don't say it - not even to someone else you just never know if it's gonna come and bite you on the bum!
What goes around comes around! Besides how can we judge when we don't know their exact circumstance - walk a mile in their shoes etc etc. (Just call me the cliche queen! )------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: mummy_dee
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 8:38pm
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Yeah its unfortunate that alot of people build themselves up by putting others down.
Jaz - I love your observation about the best parents in the world! Too true  And yes I fully admit I was guilty of it too ... How quickly you learn once you have children of your own ------------- Daphne Married Stuart: 19/03/05 Oliver: 9/06/06 Lilia due: 19/03/08 http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Chovynz
Date Posted: 10 October 2007 at 8:48pm
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ooooooo yes....
I was good at judgmentalism once.... But I'm better now. In fact Im the best! Ahahahaha I'm better than youoooouuoooo. I know more about parenting than youooooooo. "Oh really? Then maybe you can take my kids for a day?" Uh... Btw this is a silly joke not-serious post if you didn't get it. I hate judgementalism. I had it bad. I don't like seeing it. It's horrible. It destroys people if they let it. ------------- Defending the male species since 1980 
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