Three Children?
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: Have A Baby?
Forum Name: First baby? Second or more?
Forum Description: Want help? Need support? Want tips? Men and women share advice and tips in this supportive community
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=11694
Printed Date: 07 October 2025 at 2:42pm
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Topic: Three Children?
Posted By: Helen80
Subject: Three Children?
Date Posted: 22 October 2007 at 5:27pm
| I have a 4 year old and a 2 1/2 year old (20months apart). I am considering having another child. Any one have suggestions on whether this is a good idea or not? |
Replies:
Posted By: Kels
Date Posted: 22 October 2007 at 5:35pm
|
If you feel ready I say go for it ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs |
Posted By: Helen80
Date Posted: 22 October 2007 at 5:39pm
How do you know if you are ready tho? I have a million thoughts about the pros and cons of having another. Will I cope mentally, emotionally and financially etc? I already have 2 perfect children do I risk having another or should I just be happy with what I have? Its sucha MASSIVE decision. 
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Posted By: Kels
Date Posted: 22 October 2007 at 5:49pm
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Defintely a huge decision. I guess tho it comes down to if you want another one and if yes would it be better to have one now or later on in the future. I think all the pros and cons would be the same or at least similar at any stage. I dont think you will really know how you will cope until you have 3. Sorry I cant offer any other advice. For me going from 2 to 3 was a lot of work but Im a single mum so may not be too much for you. Goodluck with your decision ------------- http://lilypie.com">
Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs |
Posted By: Helen80
Date Posted: 22 October 2007 at 5:56pm
thanks heaps for the advise. it is true that the same pros and cons will always be there, I had not thought about that. Thanks again 
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Posted By: Kels
Date Posted: 22 October 2007 at 6:00pm
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Goodluck with your decision again Helen. If I had a DH I would defintely be planning #4 so It cant be too bad having 3, I havent run away from home yet or gone bankrupt lol ------------- http://lilypie.com">
Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs |
Posted By: Helen80
Date Posted: 22 October 2007 at 6:05pm
| everything does always seem to work out aye!? |
Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 22 October 2007 at 7:20pm
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We have three, all about 18mos apart. I love how they are all close enough in age to be friends. It's hard work in the beginning but if you have friends nearby who can help out if you just need an hour's break, then I say go for it! -------------  |
Posted By: AnnC
Date Posted: 22 October 2007 at 9:05pm
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I have three as well. Going from 2 to 3 was a bit harder but it was cause my youngest before Rhyley was 8 years old so got out of the baby days. Now that he is sleeping thru its no problem re really. Sure its a bit more hard work (and money)but nothing that you can't handle - although my other two are pretty indepenant and at school.
You have to do what is right for you and your family. Unfortunatly you need to make this decision yourself. We have thought about #4 but unsure so know how you are feeling. ------------- Ann 
Also Mum to Josh (15) and Brooke (10) |
Posted By: Kels
Date Posted: 22 October 2007 at 9:26pm
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Now now Ann remember our pac lol Im still hunting for that DH then roll on #4 ------------- http://lilypie.com">
Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs |
Posted By: AnnC
Date Posted: 22 October 2007 at 10:37pm
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hehe kels - I haven't forgotten ------------- Ann
Also Mum to Josh (15) and Brooke (10) |
Posted By: mum2emj
Date Posted: 23 October 2007 at 6:50am
| i wasnt sure either. in the end me and hubby left it to fate and decided to try for a couple of months and see what happened, got pregnant the first month and it was decided! lol. i found it real easy to settle in with 3 there is 2 years 4 months difference in my 2nd and 3rd and i did find that age gap more challenging than my 17 month age gap with my first 2 girls. i wouldnt have it any other way. i love my girls soooooo much, as soon as kayla was born i knew it was meant to be. it might sound cheesy! lol. number 4 was decided for us too! haha, ask me again in may how i feel about that one! im freaking out! eek! |
Posted By: Helen80
Date Posted: 23 October 2007 at 8:45am
| yeah I think that we could fall pregnant straight away too. We have been unprotected once since my last period so who knows if I am already pregnant. In some ways I think that it is inevitable that you are going to fall pregnant if you are unprotected, especially since the other 2 children were straight away - the second somehow without even trying! |
Posted By: Helen80
Date Posted: 23 October 2007 at 8:48am
| I also thought that the smaller the gap the better friends that they will be. My other 2 children are playing happily more and more as they get older. But then it only takes one sick child or one bad day with 2 kids and you think! No way - 2 is PLENTY! But when they are all happy and healthy I think another little blessing would be fantastic. |
Posted By: my2angels
Date Posted: 23 October 2007 at 9:57am
| Ive been going down the 3 children track at the moment too. Im curious though, what do you do about bedrooms? im not sure we could afford a 4 bedroom house and do you put boys and girls in the same room and then the baby in its own room? I really dont like having a baby in our bedroom, would rather it was by itself but you cant put it with one of the older kids. |
Posted By: mum2emj
Date Posted: 23 October 2007 at 10:19am
| my two oldest share a bedroom really happily, are great friends. we live in a 3 bedroom house, we gave jade and em the master bedroom so they had plenty of room to play etc... we took the next biggest room which is totally fine size for us- kayla is in the smallest room not sure where this baby will go yet... ideally i would love a 4 or 5 bedroom house but they arent cheap so will try and make do with the 3 for as long as we can. |
Posted By: kezplanet
Date Posted: 23 October 2007 at 10:28am
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We are also going down this track at the moment .... my girls are about 6mths younger than yours at the moment Helen80, & I have had all the same thoughts about whether I will be able to cope or not and about money but for me it comes down to I want another baby and DH is happy for another so we will see what happens. Tho if we are not preg this month we have to put the breaks on for about 3 months as we are meant to be going to Fiji for a wedding in August so need to have had baby or under 7mths to fly ... my luck it will happen somewhere in between (I could miss fiji for that!!)
Good luck for your decision and ttc  ------------- Kerryn, Mum to Ashlyn(29/3/04), Anastasia(1/11/05) & Abigail (24/02/09) |
Posted By: kezplanet
Date Posted: 23 October 2007 at 10:35am
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Robyn, we already have the 2 girls in the same room and found that they both started sleeping better! I like the idea of a boy and girl sharing a room at this age and when they get older then maybe re-think sleeping arrangements depending on what you have for #3 by then maybe by then lotto has come your way & you can get the bigger house .... hahaha thats whats going to happen for us!!! ------------- Kerryn, Mum to Ashlyn(29/3/04), Anastasia(1/11/05) & Abigail (24/02/09) |
Posted By: Helen80
Date Posted: 23 October 2007 at 11:28am
| Yeah I wonder about the the bedroom thing too. My eldest child was a really noisy sleeper so when he was a newborn he slept in the lounge, it was also the warmest room in the house. Then when we had the next she was a quieter sleeper and I was sad when she was too big to fit in our room. They have their own rooms now and would have the new baby (if we have one) with us. Then when it was older would put it in the room with the same sex sibling. My brother and sister in-law have their 6th child on the way and they live in a 3 bedroom house! |
Posted By: kezplanet
Date Posted: 23 October 2007 at 12:01pm
OMG  I would love to have 4 children but we will see how things go when/if #3 gets here------------- Kerryn, Mum to Ashlyn(29/3/04), Anastasia(1/11/05) & Abigail (24/02/09) |
Posted By: Helen80
Date Posted: 23 October 2007 at 12:18pm
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yeah amazing aye?... and she home schools them! I think sometimes we can be quite materialistic and have our expectations too high of what we need to provide our children with. But then on the flip side you do need to weigh some things up. My husband used to say 7 kids - but I am wondering if I will cope with 3 let alone 7! He is keen for another baby.
How old are your kids kezplanet? Are you trying for #3? |
Posted By: my4beauties
Date Posted: 23 October 2007 at 2:52pm
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After having my 2nd I said NO to any more children. But 13 months later I was pg with #3!! It was a total accident though, but by then I was thinking about #3, but not for at least another year.
I would say if you're thinking about it & your DH is keen, then go for it. It makes a lot of difference if you have the support of your DH. That was what made me think about having a 3rd, because my DH was saying how we WERE having another after our 2nd. Although he would love a 4th!! And I'm TOTALLY not up for that! I love babies, but they're hard work & I've never planned/wanted to have more than 3. I think your childrens age gaps are great too, so the younger one now, will be old enough to help you out if a baby does come along. I'm finding my nearly 2 yr old hard work with having a baby as well, but my 4 yr old is easy & helpful (most of the time  ). ------------- My babies: R (9),G (7), J (5) http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: Helen80
Date Posted: 23 October 2007 at 7:21pm
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I think that the more I think about it and hear what other Mums think the more I am warming to the idea. I have an amazingly helpful husband and he is kean for another. I think that maybe geting pregnant at Christmas time would be nice - then would have September baby. Not sure to start trying now or not as if I was to get pregnant straight away new baby would be due on the 5th birthday of my eldest!
How do the older children cope when a new baby comes along? When our 2nd came along the older one was only 20months so didn't realy know. |
Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 23 October 2007 at 7:28pm
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I've had Kryssi and Hannah sharing a room from when Kryssi was 1-2mos. Hannah learnt to sleep through Kryssi in the night so it mostly worked well. Briona has a bunk, so Hannah has recently shifted into Briona's room but when we first tried that (last Christmas) Briona was too young for it and wouldn't get to sleep with Hannah in there - she'd climb up to Hannah's bunk and then cry cause she couldn't get down!!! (repeatedly, every night *rolls eyes*)
Hannah was 3 when Kryssi was born, she really liked "our baby" and helping pass various things. Briona really loves to take dirty nappies out (strange lol!). They both love having cuddles etc. Didn't have too many probs, in fact as far as them adjusting goes, it was a lot easier than the first time cause they were already used to playing with each other and not just me. In saying all that though, I would always try to spend 1/2 hour with Hannah each day doing something "older child"-ish (like Junior Monopoly or cardboard puzzles) while the other two were sleeping. ------------- |
Posted By: kezplanet
Date Posted: 23 October 2007 at 9:58pm
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My girls - Ashlyn is 3y 7mths, Anastasia will be 2 on november 1st. Yep we are trying for #3. I had a m/c bout 8 weeks ago at 12 weeks, so just seeing what happens!!
I think is also helps if DH helps around the house & with the other kids, Karl has grown so much since having the girls and he just dotes on them. I also helps when you don't have to convince him that you want another - 1 more hurdle out of the way! ------------- Kerryn, Mum to Ashlyn(29/3/04), Anastasia(1/11/05) & Abigail (24/02/09) |