Older Parents
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: General Chat
Forum Name: General Chat
Forum Description: For mums, dads, parents-to-be, grandparents, friends -- you name it! And you name the topic you want to chat about!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=13932
Printed Date: 17 December 2025 at 11:12am
Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 12.05 - http://www.webwizforums.com
Topic: Older Parents
Posted By: mummy_becks
Subject: Older Parents
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 9:26pm
|
My friend asked me today what I thought of people in there late 30's having children. And I told her that its fine; they have waited to have children and so long as they are happy its all good. She said it is unfair on the child (I totally disagree) to have older parents. Her example is that her BIL is now in a new relationship with a younger girl, he is 37 and she is 26. She is now pregnant and she things that the baby will miss out as her BIL is older and has older children from his previous relationship (they are 16 and 14). Strange thing to say isn't it??? ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Replies:
Posted By: Bubbaloo
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 9:29pm
|
I don't have a problem with it as they your as old as you feel and people live longer these days and seem to have more of a quality of life I have a few friends with older parents and they never seemed to mind.
it does seem like a strange thing to say though. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  Was danni-chick Mum to James My Angel 28/07/08 |
Posted By: Jennz
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 9:38pm
|
What about women in their 60s though? I think there comes a point, I don't know when it is though, when it becomes selfish. Just my opinion though! ------------- Jen, Charlotte 7 & Kate 3 
|
Posted By: EmDee
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 9:40pm
|
That is strange. My mum was 35 when she had me and there are the following age gaps between me & my brothers and sisters (all older) 7, 14, 15, 16. I don't feel like I missed out on anything. It may have been nice to have a siblng closer in age, but thats about the only thing I can think of ... ------------- DS 8 DD 6 DS 4 DD 2 |
Posted By: Kels
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 9:41pm
|
I dont see anything wrong with that age, thts not old I thought you were going to say something like BIL was 57 or 67. Who ever was saying that must be jealous her BIL's girlfriend is preg ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 9:43pm
|
I agree Jennz, 60 is a bit OTT.
Then again, Willie is 49 and has older children in their early 20's. I have no issues with it, but I am aware that he's unlikely to be around when the kids are adults (he has a few health issues), I just try not to think about it. That said, being an older parent isn't for me, purely coz I started so young. When I had Maya I decided that 30 was my cut off, and Iggle Piggle is definitely our last baby. I just don't want to spend my 20's and my 30's with little babies, I didn't get the whole career thing with starting so young so I'm keen to do it when the kids are a bit older coz I won't be that old. Given the choice I would probably have waiting till my early 30's to start my family but Maya arrived and changed my plans! -------------  Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
|
Posted By: tishy
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 9:47pm
This I have to agree with. Especially after the story of the 60+ (can't remember exactly) year old woman who lied about her age to get IVF. In the situation of late 30s then I don't see it as being a problem at all. Maybe your friend wouldn't have as much of an issue with it if her BIL didn't already have older kids. |
Jennz wrote:Posted By: HippyMama
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 9:55pm
| Tishy, the woman you're thinking of is now 66 - a lady in Italy I believe, and she had twins. |
Posted By: Kels
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 9:55pm
|
I had my first in my teens and 2 in my 20's and am planning hopefully 3 more in my 30's. I hope no one classes me as an older parent in my 30's as some people are only starting their families in their 40's and I think that is fine too. I have a career and I am doing 2 papers towards my masters this year so I still get to have both my kids and a career and I love it! Mums can do anything!!! Ekk off the topic BUt yeap totally agree that there does have to be a cut off point. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs |
Posted By: Paws
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 10:00pm
|
Does seem strange! I don't think 37 is partiuclary old...as the child of older (adoptive/legal guardianship) parents however I can say from my point of view it could suck.
I lost my father to a heart attack when I was 20 and my mother has been in a nursing home for around 2-3 years now...growing up everyone thought they were my grandparents and I definetly don't think they could do as much with me as younger parents. They were great parents but still...in same ways it was vastly different for me than my friends parents. It was one reason why I never wanted kids particulary late in life. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
|
Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 10:02pm
|
You are right Jennz about the people in there 60's I watched a doco on a woman in England trying to have a baby and she needed an egg and a sperm donor (I think) and a surrogute to carry the baby. I thought that was unfair (she never did - as far as I know - have a baby). But people in their 30's aren't old and are fine to have a baby. I did wonder jealousy but she dosen't want anymore so her DH had the snip late last year. ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: NovemberMum
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 10:04pm
|
my dad's parents passed away when he was 7 and 14 they would have been in their late twenties to mid 30s at a guess so they had him when they were fairly young. on the other hand my nana (not my biological nana) had her youngest at the age of 45 and is still alive and will be 92 in may.
but yeah I do think 60 is way too old I always said I wanted at least one before I am 35. and I may end up changing that to 2 ...(I have 3 years left). I guess one of the advantages is if you have your first in your late 30s say 37 ..and you bought your first home when you were say 22 and you and your partner worked hard to get rid of most if not all of that mortgage when it came time to starting a family it is financially easier for the mum to stay home if she wishes. but personally dont think I could have waited that long :) ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
|
Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 10:07pm
| then again, sometimes younger parents may have more energy to do things, but be less finanical able to - more likely to have to work, so baby is more likely to be indaycare. Personally I think there are pros and cons to having a child whenever, and certainly don't think being an "older" parent is bad at all. At my playcentre most of the women there were in there lkate 30s with toddlers. They had had careers and most were now financially able to chose to stay at home. Some did part-time work, but that was amore a want rather than a need./ |
Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 10:07pm
|
I'm starting my family in my late 30s i'm 35 this year, and I'm glad I waited I was far too immature to look after anyone but myself in my 20s. Also I didn't meet DF until I was 27 so no chance of having them young.
I too was adopted by my parents when they were 30, my mum died of cancer a few years ago at 60 and I have a fantastic relationship with my Dad. I don't agree with people past menopause having children, if the clocks stopped theres a reason for it. Why does your friend think its unfair on the children? ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">   [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 10:10pm
|
So true there I don't know exactly why, maybe its because he has older children already? Or that the whole family doesn't think that the relationship is actually going to last. ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: cuppatea
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 10:21pm
|
I don't see the problem with 37 either, it is hardly old Perhaps she just doesn't like the age gap between him and sister and the whole being too old for children is really that she thinks he is too old to be with her sister?
I also think there does get to a point when it becomes unfair to the child, I remember a pic of David Jason in the UK papers when he had his first child and I think he was 67 (or there abouts) and I felt sorry for the baby because in all likelihood s/he will not know her/his dad for very long and will miss out on a lot of the things even when he is alive because there is a limit to what things a man that age can do. (no matter how young they feel) ------------- 
 
|
Posted By: Kels
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 10:22pm
|
I totally agree with the menopause thing too. Mather nature has these rules for a reason lol ------------- http://lilypie.com">
Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs |
Posted By: linda
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 10:40pm
| We're trying for number three and I'm 40....but don't feel 40. I love being a mum, we have great kids, we're great parents (if I may say so) and we would both like one more! Some say 18 is to young.....each to there own. |
Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 10:44pm
|
Thats what I think as well Linda, you are happy to have another one. People say I was too young at 22 to have a baby. ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: .Mel
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 11:01pm
|
My mum and dad had me at 18/19yrs old and then had my sister at 23. My parents are my buds now, I love hanging out with them. DH and dad get along really well. I remember when I was at school, I always had the youngest parents.. was kind of cool from memory.
I had Conor at 22, Nyah at 30 and Cooper at 35. I'd always said that once I hit 35 that was it, no more kids. Each to their own I think. My friend had a baby at 41. She'd been trying for years to conceive, and last year was her year. I think at 35 I'm a young mum. I always say that I'll grow old but I won't grow up. ------------- Mr Mellow (16) Miss Attitude (8) Destructa Kid (3) 
|
Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 11:07pm
|
I'm going to tell her she's being a bit silly 37 isn't that old to have a baby, and anyway he's going to be the dad. ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: Jennz
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 11:08pm
You can just tell anyone who says that that 22 is actually the optimum age physically to have your first child  Your body has stopped growing but it hasn't started ageing yet so is best equipped to grow a healthy baby.
I think there are advantages either way- plus alot of people don't have the option. I have one friend who was desperate to have children young but hasn't found the right guy. I, on the other hand, wanted to wait until I was older (late 20s, early 30s) but madam Charlotte had other ideas! 
Sounds like there is more going on with your friend than just the age thing worrying her, seems like a pretty weird thing to focus on. ------------- Jen, Charlotte 7 & Kate 3
|
Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 11:11pm
|
You're propbably right there Jennz there is probably something else that she hasn't told me. I always thought 22 was a great age. I f I have another one it'll be in the next 2 years and by then i'll be 27 still not that old IMO. ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: Aprilfools
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 11:14pm
|
Well they have the same age gap as me and my DH. I'm 25 and DH is 36. I've never viewed him as too old for me or me too young for him. I don't think DH is too old yet but he's gettin there. Not in the sense that he's too old to nurture a child.
I want to have our children now so that we can enjoy them as adults. My mother had me when she was 19 and we have a great relationship and love spending time together. My grandparents are also quite young so we also have a great relationship and that's what I want for my children and grandchildren. |
Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 11:18pm
|
I;ve got young parents too (well dad turns 50 this year) and i'm 26 and my mum was 19 when she had me. So Andrew is lucky that he has young grandparents to play with (he often would wrestle with my dad). I've still got my nana she is 72 and has 16 grand children and 19 great grandchildren and still young at heart. Opps a bit off the topic there. ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: cheekymonkeysmum
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 11:44pm
|
There is nothing wrong with older parents...I've just had my first child @ 36 (after years of trying and waiting). I don't think I would have been ready for a kid before 30 (sorry I'm very young at heart). Most of my family (6 of us) had their kids in their 30's and their kids are not missing out on anything...I feel that they are getting more attention and love because their parents are more settled and have lots more life experience (they have done their partying etc...they know what they want for life).
(Also I agree with everyone else about having a child at 60 -it is not right....) http://lilypie.com">  
|
Posted By: NovemberMum
Date Posted: 25 January 2008 at 11:50pm
|
I was nowhere near ready (emotionally at least) to have a baby at 22 I had only just gotten together with my husband. I am pretty certain I would have been a different mum had I had a baby almost 10 years ago instead of now.
------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
|
Posted By: Jennz
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 12:51am
I think you're my doppelgänger Becks! I'm also 26 (had my first at 22), my Mum was 19 when she had me and my Dad is turning 50 in December  Don't suppose you were born in Palmy as well?------------- Jen, Charlotte 7 & Kate 3
|
Posted By: Mama2two
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 1:21am
|
I have to agree that 60 is far too old to be having children, but there is nothing wrong with being in your 30's or even early 40's.
We started TTC when I was in my mid 20's but with Endo and numerous other problems/miscarriages it took us 5 years to concieve Samantha. I am now 32 and feel like this is the perfect time for me to be a Mummy. I look forward to (fingers crossed) a second in a couple more years. Having Sam a little later means that I now have my career pretty much on track and am able to have time off to raise my wee girl, and can pick up where I left off whenever I choose to go back to work. It also means financially I am able to stay home with her if i choose too. Edited to add: My brother's wife has just announced she is PG with her second (she is 22 and my brother is 35). I have to say that he is a much better father now to my niece who is 15 months and will be to this new addition than he ever was to his eldest daughter who he had in his 20's. Age isn't everything, sometimes maturity counts for alot!  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
|
Posted By: Jennz
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 2:16am
|
Everyone gets criticised no matter what they do! Basically if you're under 25 you're too young, not mature enough, not enough life experience, too selfish etc etc but if you're over 35 you're too old, too set in your ways, not enough energy, less likely to be around long term etc etc. I don't agree with either of those stereo types, I think it totally depends on the person. I thought my friend had got it perfect. Shes been with her husband for 6 years, they got pregnant after about a year into their marriage, shes 27 and she STILL got comments like "took you long enough" or "you haven't been married long. Didn't you want more time to yourselves?". Honestly, I don't think anyone is ever able to please everyone.
------------- Jen, Charlotte 7 & Kate 3
|
Posted By: AliaDawn
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 7:02am
|
Sometimes it would be nice if people remembered that not all teens/early 20's love to party, drink etc... and not all late 30's/40's are boring old people! Everyone is different, and most of us aren't quite picture perfect.
The only thing I could see wrong with that is if he had medical conditions where he'd die young... If my fiance's parents had kids now (FIL is 50, MIL is somewhere in her 40's) I would be pretty shocked, but that's because he's had type 1 diabetes and other stuff since he was a kid, and has already outlived his life expectancy. -------------  
 
|
Posted By: james
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 7:52am
|
my mum was 19 when she had me my dad was 20 and we are relly close my brothers and sisters are all 3 years apart and my dad turns 50 this year as well i had james at 26 still not old and it looks like i will be having my next kid in my 30s age is just a number relly but i do agree that 60 is a bit old ------------- <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b4.lilypie.com/nLJ5p13.png" alt="Lilypie 4th Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a> |
Posted By: ElfsMum
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 8:56am
|
this is intersting...my Dh goes on and on about a small gap between Ethan and the next one because he is so old(37) I'm 30 but don't think he's that old..having said that his Dad died at 40 so maybe that's why he thinks that way but i think we could wait 2 years an it would still be fine.. 35 is my cut off point but mostly for health reasons..but i think it depends on the person.. !:) ------------- Mum to two amazing boys! |
Posted By: yummymummy
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 8:59am
|
I read an interesting article saying the best age to have babies is actaully 30-35. The article argued that by that point, the mum is quite mature, financially well set up, more likely to be patient etc in rising kids and put the time aside that they need; to put their needs ahead of hers etc. It also talked about how after 35 things become too difficult ie more abnormalities due to age, difficulties to concieve so was not the best time either.
Generally I'm not against older parents as sometimes that's how long it takes to find the right person, get set-up and in the right frame of mind. And of course sometimes it takes ages to concieve. I work with someone who had her first baby in her mid 20s and then it took them over 8 years and many treatments to concieve again. We also have friends (couple) who were married 2 years before us, are a few years older and have been trying ever since with no luck. I always think also about the women who go thru many relationships trying to find THE one only to be left alone later when in their 40s or so - surely they too deserve to have a baby if they find the guts to then do it alone. I do get the point of how it may be unfair on the child if the parent is older but isn't it what happens sometimes? I'm not sure there should be a cut-off age as such as every situation is different. My 2c worth anyways!  ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
|
Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 9:14am
| I have no issue with other people being that age and having kids but its not something that I would personally do. |
Posted By: Rachael21
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 9:30am
|
My mum was 33 when she had me and dad was 36 but then they were 37 and 40 when my wee sister was born. They are awesome and definately not in a nursing home or anything and still roll round on the floor with Jack. I went to school with a boy whos mum was in her 50s and dad nearly 70
|
Posted By: nictoddie
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 9:51am
|
Well in the world we live in today there is a huge amount of blended families, and if and older guy hooks up with a younger gal then the likely hood of them starting a family is pretty high, good on them.
As for us we are older parents but hey we sure as hell don't feel old, I am 38 and by my tickers you will work out how old I was when I had no 1 and my dh is 44 and has a 15 year old yup we are a blended family , although she does not live with us and since becoming a teenager and getting a social life we don't see much of her lol!! And still toying up the idea of having no 3 not sure yet but would be this year if we did as yup the biological clock is ticking lol  ------------- 
|
Posted By: Paws
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 10:45am
That was similar to me...my parents were already 50 when they were given legal guardianship of me... ------------- http://lilypie.com">
|
Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 10:55am
|
Jennz how bizarre is that. No I wasn't born In Palmy (I was born in Brisbane), but I live here now. ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: AnnC
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 11:08am
|
ok I skipped the last few messages but heres my story...
Got pregnant at 19 - was not mature enough to have this baby but did and along came Josh.... whom I have never regretted having. I had Brooke at 25 and when I split from her dad i said that was it no more kids. Then I met DH he was so good with Brooke and Josh and treats them as his own so when he asked if we would have a child together i said ok... so along came Rhyley at 34. Dh is 5 years younger than me so his clock isn't/wasn't ticking like mine LOL... anyway NOW dh wants another one and I will be 37 if/when we have another one (not ready to have one before then) and that scares me a little.. cause I feel its old, but then I read on here and more and more people are having kids in their 30's and their late 30's I certainly won't be the odd one out. I think in peoples 30's aren't past being parents and should go for it - I mean you still have alot of energy to run around with kids etc... ------------- Ann 
Also Mum to Josh (15) and Brooke (10) |
Posted By: 11111
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 2:23pm
|
I did not read the post's, but for me personally and this is my personal choice we have said we want all our by the time Pete is 35 so that gives us another 5 year's to have 3 more. we want our kid's very close. I alway's said I wanted my first by the time I was 25 and I did the day after I turned 24. we ahve made that choice cause it suit's us and our life style.
However I have some very close friend's who are older he is about 41 she is over 35 and the yare pregnant with number 3 and looking to a 4th and the yare very fit active people with a great life style and well you would never know their age. I think it is each to their own on this one, but I do think people do have to think of the long term affect's on their children when they atart getting into their late 40's. Like someone else said I think when your body is done it is natures way of say enough. JMO tho. ------------- Deborah Mum to:   
|
Posted By: miss
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 7:52pm
|
A 60 year old man could live to 100 - a healthy 100, or even 90 (I know a lot of spry 90 year olds) giving their children a good quality 30-40 years.
A 20 year old could smash his car up at 25 (just thinking stats) thus giving his children 5 years. A family needs love. Everything else can become irrelevant so long as basic needs are met, and there is enough love. -------------  
|
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 8:17pm
It depends on the circumstances tho. Willie will bet 50 next year, has type 2 diabetes, emphysema, obstructive sleep apnoea and is also on medications for blood pressure and cholesterol, and his brother dropped dead at 54 of a heart attack so in some ways he is living on borrowed time, but at the same time I believe the most important thing is the time that he spends with his kids now. He definitely takes his health a lot more seriously since we had the girls, has given up smoking, is losing weight etc. to try and prolong his life but at the end of the day there's no guarantee how long any of us have. I'm only 27 yet I could have an accident tomorrow and predecease Willie regardless of his health issues. ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
|
Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 8:31pm
|
It's scary to think of, I think we decided that we didn't want any kids after 30, simply for the reason of we have seen the bad side of things.
My mum had my sister at 40, and now here she is, turning 60 this year, in renal failure and still watching out for my younger sister who's at home bludging, is abusive, and treats mum like a maid, as well mum's a full-time guardian to a hell-on-wheels 3yr old. I have seen the bad side of things which skewed my view a bit, that and well, maybe if it had been her 1st or 2nd kid at that age, yeah, fine, but after having 1st one at 19, by the time she got to my sister, number 6, she was over it and just let her run riot and didn't give a stuff anymore. Who cares about age, i think it's attitude really and fitness and ability, who says a 40 yr old can't run around the yard with their kids it's up to them to stay healthy and most can do that perfectly well. Mike has the same opinion on not wanting kids after 30, but that's influenced by the fact that he's still trying to live up to his parents example of having him at 15, him moving out when his mum was 32-ish, and them having a whole heap of fun now independant, pretty well off and doing lots of neat stuff holidays, set up well. I think the main thing i worry about actually is mike, it scares me that already i can see him loosing muscle tone, he has no body fat, he gets sick much quicker and for longer these days and we have no idea what's causing it. I worry that if this is how bad it's gotten after 8 years, how long it will be before it affects his life alot. but as Emma said, who knows how much time we have. The main thing i try to tell my mates though, the ones who are waiting and waiting and wiating, is that, well, don't leave it too late, it is well known that things start getting harder ofter mid 30's. There are so many many women who spend their 20's trying not to get pregnant, then sttle, marry and start TTC in their mid 30's once the carreer and the house and travelling is done, only to find it's too late, their body won't do it, and that for me is sad, sad that they didn't know this sooner, or didn't try sooner cos adding in all the tests and treatments etc the chances of having a baby take longer and get more remote as the time ticks by - definately not wanting to be a downer, but I do really feel for the ones who waited so long then find they can't have them. Am forever saying to my mates that yeah all well and good, go do all the fun stuff, but don't leave it too late. ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja 
|
Posted By: 11111
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 9:39pm
Well said chick. ------------- Deborah Mum to:
|
Posted By: Redbedrock
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 10:12pm
|
I don't know but i guess you could call Neil and i older parents as we were 36 when Fay was born, but i was in a panic when we found out we were pregnant cos i felt like i was too young to have a baby
We are hoping that having Fay will keep us young through our middle years, she will probably be the responsible one tho ------------- http://www.babysfirstsite.com"> 
|
Posted By: Kels
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 10:42pm
|
ROFLMAO Clare, you are a young mum. I plan on being a young mum too to the 3 more I plan to have in my 30's. I would not class anyone in their early to mid 30's anything but young. Emma I totally agree too about never really knowing how long you have to live. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs |
Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 26 January 2008 at 10:48pm
|
Yep so true about how long you have to go. My friends friend died last year in a car accident and he was 29 and left behind 2 kids and 1 had just been born she was only 5 weeks old when he died. ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 27 January 2008 at 4:05pm
|
Yeah ,my friend died in june from a blood clot and her daughter was only 3 weeks old, she never even got to see her daughter turn a month old, never got to bath her(she was too scared to so got her husband to all the time) or see her first smile, or all the things mums usually get to see ,instead her daughter turned a month old the day of her funeral
My friend was only 23 so definetly not old yet she died from something that isnt that common in young people, sucks, still messes me up :-( ANYWAY , i was young when i had Caitlyn (20) and i'll probably be thirty or near abouts when i have my next, i dont think i'll be an older mum (thirty is not old!!!) just a more experienced one I do think 60 is selfish tho , sorry , just my opinion |
Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 27 January 2008 at 4:08pm
| oh and even tho its sexist by 60 i was talking about women who have babies and lie about their ages in order to qualify |
Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 27 January 2008 at 4:40pm
I have to disagree, why should this put people off having a family. If people were put off having babies cause they thought they might die no one would have them. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 27 January 2008 at 7:03pm
|
none of us know when our time is up , fact is none of us are invincible,but i would rather die knowing my heart got a chance to love my daughter than not.
that said, i hate the thought of leaving my girl, I would be so worried about her |
Posted By: MummyFreckle
Date Posted: 27 January 2008 at 8:11pm
|
Right on Jennz - you should have a baby when you are ready to have a baby, and if one comes along when you arent ready - then hey so long as its loved it doesnt really matter. I think that older parents have a lot to offer, just because they might not be able to kick a ball around or ride bikes, they can offer different things. I had a close girlfriend who was an only child and her parents had her when they were both in their mid 40s. They were financially secure and spend a lot of time travelling with her and doing fantastic things like visiting galleries and going to the opera. She grew up so completely well rounded, and both her parents are still alive and in their late 70s now.
------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
|