Wedding stuff - opinions please?
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Topic: Wedding stuff - opinions please?
Posted By: mum2paris
Subject: Wedding stuff - opinions please?
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 8:46am
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Well, my should-have-been wedding day just passed over the weekend and i worked all day instead, lol ick!
anyway i need some opinions here and knew that you ladies would give me honest advice, have also posted this on NZWP to get a good range of ideas. Here's the deal, we postponed our wedding date, our venue transferred our venue fee. We have now probably decided that instead of using our venue for the recption as well we might just use their gardens, which are included in the deposit price, we are thinking of having a morning wedding and having the reception lunch at a local restaurant, then people who wish to come can come and those who don't don't have to, it would be pay your own way and that way they pretty much have their own choice of meals etc. Of course we would still put a bit of a tab on the bar, but not too much given it's the middle of the day. We decided this because we have realised that thanks to our situation over the 3 month period of xmas, which will continue until mike finishes study in 3 yrs time, he has study break over xmas which means we go down to just my wages which keep us afloat but don't actually do anything for saving in any way, so won't actually mean we have any money for the wedding at the time we have it unless we have saved it up until his study stops. My question would be this... What's the point of having it in February... when realistically it will all have to paid for by November. Me and mike are toying with the idea of bringing it forward to November, which is when my MOH will be back from London, getting it over and done with so to speak.. in a nice way, we've been together so long and we just want our wedding, doesn't have to be a big crazy expensive thing. we have the dress etc, rings, shoes, just need the BM dress, and the little girls dresses, and the guys are hiring the tuxes anyway. Is it worth trying? Or do i leave it at the feb date and just make sure i have everything paid for.. with the chance that if anything comes up last minute before the wedding we'll be in serious trouble with no back-up money around. I don't want to muck people around, the only major booking thus far is the original venue, and the celebrant. If i'm going to do this i need to figure it out quickly. I spose the best place to start would be the restaurant where i want to have it to discuss what we want to do. Then the Celebrant and the original venue. Anyway.. advice please, for those that have had small get-togethers. Also any money saving ideas would be awesome. ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja 
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Replies:
Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 9:03am
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money saving ideas -
my sil had a finger food wedding with BYO grog... (and they could afford to pay for it). use family - my BIL drove me - he has a nice car and he even brought the ribbons cause he likes to show off his car. my mum made the dresses for me, my niece - who was my ring bearer - and her. We used the older boys as waiters for us and we had spit roast catering for our meal and the after function was held at my SIL house... We had the actual ceremony at the wintergardens...and it was lovely cause then we just had the photos done there too...(that isnt really relevant but i liked my wedding and wanted to share). I had no bridesmaids cause i couldnt really afford dresses for them. My sis and my BIL were our witnesses and my niece and hubbys son carried the rings to us on ribbons round thier necks my mum had made to match our outfits. November is nice, not too hot not too cool. so i say if the venue is ok with that then go for it. you may find they prefer it cause feb is a very busy time for weddings...and perhaps they have an off peak rate..?? ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
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Posted By: arohanui
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 9:07am
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If it was me I'd see if I could bring it forward to Nov - I mean it's worth sussing out if you can anyway, you might not be able to (bookings and stuff) so that could make the decision for you!
But I think the fact that you've got to have it paid for by then anyway you may as well get married then right? In reading your post, it sounds as though that might be your preference. Hmm money saving ideas... um you've got the thing with guests paying for their own lunch which is one of the biggest costs. BM dresses - if you know someone who can sew, get them to do it.. or buy off the rack. Flower girl dresses... when we got married in April 06, Farmers had some cool little "party" dresses that were very flower girl ish. You could check that out. Also make your own invites - we made these awesome ones, just printed out the info on white card and cut that out and stuck it on blue card (a third of A4)... at the top we stuck on flax (cut from bags from the $2 shop) and a couple of small pieces of paua (got more than enough off trademe for $10 or something). Also if you need things like a cake, if someone asks you what you want for a pressie why not get them to give you that? Or other things that you need for the wedding.. Oo, exciting, I love weddings!  ------------- Mama to DS1 (5 years), DS2 (3 years) and... http://alterna-tickers.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: arohanui
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 9:08am
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Oh and one more - you could ask your bridesmaids to pay for their dress.. of course making sure it's not too expensive cos I think that's stink having to pay for a $400 dress that you don't like! ------------- Mama to DS1 (5 years), DS2 (3 years) and... http://alterna-tickers.com" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 9:12am
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Well that's what i was thinking and also since we are just using their gardens, and would be about 10.30 it also means they could still book another wedding ceremony/reception for later on in the day if they wanted.
I thinkt he lunch idea would mean more chance of us being able to book out the paticular restaurant as well, and we'd still do the bar tab but everyone would pay their own meals in lieu of pressies. Dress is already bought, MIL has already started making the BM dress (i only have 1 now), There are alot of things that are pretty much already all in place. Just needing confirming etc Have my dress and whole outfit, am Making my own cake, Brother is doing photos, mikes aunty is a make-up artist, and we know people with wedding cars etc.. and flowers i know i can pick up what i want pretty cheaply at that time of year. ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja
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Posted By: IVFGirl1111
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 9:13am
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Try and bring it forward to November I say!
Another idea is you could have a later wedding say 6pm and then just have supper later on instead of a dinner. Maybe just have a single flower instead of a big bunch, have you got someone in the family that could make your cake? |
Posted By: IVFGirl1111
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 9:14am
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Just read your post - sounds like you are totally sorted anyway really - so bring it forward! lol
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Posted By: arohanui
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 9:18am
Sounds like you've made your mind up already to me  ------------- Mama to DS1 (5 years), DS2 (3 years) and... http://alterna-tickers.com" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: jack_&_charli
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 10:23am
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janine it sounds like you have pretty much everything organised so i'd go for it.......nov 22nd is a great day to get married ------------- http://www.alternatickers.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: BabyOnBoard
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 11:19am
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It's your wedding so you should do what you wanna ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 12:11pm
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Bring it forward! -------------  Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 12:12pm
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do it. ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: Bel
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 12:18pm
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yeah we got maried in November (18th) and it is a great time of year - move it forward ------------- Mum to two beautiful kids
Luke (09.11.2007) Amy (01.04.2009) |
Posted By: daikini
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 12:24pm
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Is there a sentimental reason for February rather than November? Otherwise, I'd say go for it!
Money saving ideas... getting guests to buy their own meal rather than a gift is a good one... another one can be the tab at the bar pays for non-alcoholic drinks only, or that and beer/wine (house varieties) only, and guests buy their own spirits. My bridesmaids made their own outfits from a pattern I supplied (they both had someone who could sew it for them) as their gift to us, and my mum made Kiya's flowergirl dress. Our cake was made at cost by a dessert chef as another gift, and a friend who was a hairdresser did mine and my bridesmaids and Kiya's hair as her gift. Workmates of my mum drove us, for a dozen beer and the chance to show off their cars. If you can find friends who have skills that could help, make the most of it! ------------- Becca, mum of 2 girls & 3 boys |
Posted By: susieq
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 12:34pm
| Bring it forward |
Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 12:45pm
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lol wouldn't have to worry about hairdresser, cos since i had my hair chopped off, it wouldn't be long enough by then to have anything done to it so would get it cut back to original length and go from there,
Gah, have just been going around and sorting stuff out this morning.. on the plus side the guys suits are sorted - i dragged mike reluctantly to try some. ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja
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Posted By: JadeC
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 12:51pm
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If you haven't got a cake yet, a friend of mine brought hers off trademe (!!!) and it was cheap ($250) looked fantastic, and tasted divine! Much cheaper than any other wedding cake places! ------------- http://pregnancy.baby-gaga.com/" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 1:00pm
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ARGH!, venue's booked out every day in november except sunday the 16th.
sunday. ick dammit might have to keep it where it is. ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja
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Posted By: The_Stuarts
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 1:37pm
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Oh, take it take it!! I was actually going to say that November 16 is a wonderful day to get married (it happens to be my wedding anniversary).
Found this rhyme for you: Marry when the year is new, he'll be loving, kind and true. When February birds do mate, you wed nor dread your fate. If you wed when March winds blow, joy and sorrow both you'll know. Marry in April when you can, joy for maiden and for man. Marry in the month of May, and you'll surely rue the day. Marry when June roses grow, over land and sea you'll go. Those who in July do wed must labor for their daily bread. Whoever wed in August be, many a change is sure to see. Marry in September's shrine, your living will be rich and fine. If in October you do marry, love will come but riches tarry. If you wed in bleak November, only joys will come, remember. When December snows fall fast, marry and true love will last ------------- http://lilypie.com">   http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: daikini
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 1:39pm
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What's ick about a Sunday wedding, Janine?
That's a fun rhyme The_Stuarts! ------------- Becca, mum of 2 girls & 3 boys |
Posted By: The_Stuarts
Date Posted: 04 March 2008 at 1:40pm
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Oh, just found something else on same site about choosing the weekday for your wedding.
Monday is for wealth Tuesday is for health Wednesday is the best day of all Thursday is for losses Friday is for crosses Saturday is for no luck at all Friday was considered the most unlucky day to marry, while Wednesday was the best day. Sunday was once considered the most popular day to get married, as it was the only day most people were free from work. But in the seventeenth century, Puritans put a stop to this because they thought it was improper be festive on the Sabbath. It is considered lucky to marry when the second-hand of the clock is going up instead of going down. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 05 March 2008 at 9:25am
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he he, Well, chances are that we are keeping it as it is due to the venue thing but it has given us a bit of a kick in the right direction and getting planning organised so that we can pay as we go and have it all pre-paid by the time we need it.
This end of year should be cheaper as PAris will be at school which means that mike's xmas break will cover her time off, and by then ayja will be subsidised for the 20 free hours and we can cut her hours down over xmas. so shouldn't be too pricey. YAY for planning though. Am still going ahead with meetings and fittings and getting my bum into gear. ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja
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Posted By: Red
Date Posted: 05 March 2008 at 9:48am
| A Sunday would be good cos if you are having a lunch thing then people aren't going to be drinking and dancing to the early hours. |
Posted By: The_Stuarts
Date Posted: 05 March 2008 at 9:59am
Good point Red although the same works on a Saturday. We had a late morning wedding and lunch (finger food) with bubbly afterwards. We'd bought 4 cases of bubbly but actually only used 3 and we left the reception at 5pm to go back to our hotel then had a nice quiet dinner together at the hotel restaurant. It was perfect for us. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
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Red wrote:Posted By: MissAngel
Date Posted: 05 March 2008 at 10:56am
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Hmm what are we doing that might help...
Our venue is the ceremony and reception, spit roast company is doing the food (they do a full buffett with service staff and everything for cheap) cash bar cuz I refuse to buy booze when I dont drink hehe.. my dress is coming from trademe for $549 and its being made specially.. my bridesmaids are buying their own dresses and shoes, im doing my own makeup and hair, and doing my bridesmaids as well.. the guys are having shirts and ties from farmers, oh and pants.. um, what else lol.. oh cakes come from trademe as well at a REALLY good price. Our whole wedding is coming in (apart from night before and after accomodation) for $3972. Ive made all the table crap myself in advance - and the invitations - although in saying that, trademe is BRILLIANT for all that stuff - I dont know what i'd do without it!!!!! |
Posted By: The_Stuarts
Date Posted: 05 March 2008 at 11:19am
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MissAngel that sounds great. We paid for our own wedding too and did it on a budget I can't remember now how much each thing cost but in total our wedding cost less than $4,000 (including hotel for wedding night and mini honeymoon afterwards).
Here's what we did. * Flowers: got the florist from New World to do them all including posy for on top of cake. Was very specific with her and she did a brilliant job at a supermarket price (I think she was actually delighted to get the chance to do a wedding). * Bridesmaids: I made their outfits as my gift to them. They did their own hair and makeup. * Wedding dress etc: I designed my dress and my mum made it with the help of my grandma who sewed tiny little beads along the 3 metres of hem (total cost was approx $200). I got my lingerie from the bendon factory shop and borrowed white shoes from a friend. I wore a family heirloom lace veil. * My hair & makeup: I did my own makeup and my mum did my hair. * Groom & Groomsmen: We hired their suits and bought their shirts * Alcohol: as mentioned earlier we bought 4 cases of bubbly (nothing else) and the wine glasses were loaned to us for free by the liqour store. * Food: We self catered. I bought everything and friends and family helped prepare it all. * Waiting staff: we hired students through student job search and asked one of my mums friends to be their boss. * Cake: This was a wedding gift from my sil * Photographer: used student job search for this too and got a student photographer who was finished her art degree. She was very cheap and we got to keep all the film afterwards and she got to use our pics in her portfolio. * Venue: Hired a hall and decorated it ourselves the morning of the wedding My one extravagence was $400 on a classic Jaguar as the wedding car. I loved it and it looks great in the pics. We had a wonderful wedding day and the only thing I would change if I could go back is that I would organise a casual BBQ or something similar for the day after the wedding so I could spend more time with my family and friends that had travelled to be there. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 05 March 2008 at 11:33am
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We are figuring out that really if we go for the spit-roast option available through our venue (which is ceremony and reception) and ask for people to pay $20 a head in lieu of pressies, that only leaves us with about $15 a head to pay which ends up probably at about $1000 for food and am only sticking $1000 on bar for white or red wine, and beer and that's it (apart from special allowance for bride and groom as mike only drinks spirits).
The suits are cheapish, as mike needs special sized clothes, so his mum is using the same fabric as the BM dress to make waistcoats for the 2 guys, then we are hiring the black shirt and black pants for them, so once the 20% discount comes off (since i got my dress from the same shop) then all up will be $80.. cos mike fits kids size top and pants so worked out cheaper for his. lol.. there are many plus sides to having a little guy as a hubby - cheaper clothes is always going to be one of those. It will all figure out. We'll be fine we just need to get going and do it, neither of us are good at making decisions and i think lately we've gotten into a rut of not really doing much so we just need a rocket. lol ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja
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Posted By: miss
Date Posted: 05 March 2008 at 11:49am
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ooooh, I would LOVE to go to a lunch type wedding on a sunday! I reckon that would be a great day to have it. -------------  
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Posted By: newmum
Date Posted: 05 March 2008 at 1:20pm
i'd bring it forward, why not october even? I never understand why people need soooooooo long to organise everything? Seems to me you are pretty much ready anyway...  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: The_Stuarts
Date Posted: 05 March 2008 at 1:26pm
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Oh, check out your new ticker mum2paris. Exciting!! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 05 March 2008 at 1:37pm
hehe, yeah there was another one saying bridezilla but we might put that to good use nearer the time. ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja
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