Positivity vs Negativity
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Topic: Positivity vs Negativity
Posted By: Parki
Subject: Positivity vs Negativity
Date Posted: 13 March 2008 at 2:30pm
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I try to live my life with the attitude that being positive attracts positive things to me & my life.....
I feel that being constantly negative attracts negative energy and more things go wrong...... I was trying to explain this to someone recently and they thought it was a load of cr*p! Does anyone else agree with me? Im just curious....  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Replies:
Posted By: james
Date Posted: 13 March 2008 at 2:34pm
yep also having bad people around you will invite bad things ------------- <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b4.lilypie.com/nLJ5p13.png" alt="Lilypie 4th Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a> |
Posted By: blondy
Date Posted: 13 March 2008 at 2:40pm
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I'm a total believer in what I call 'instant karma'. What I mean is that what goes around really does come around, whether that is good or bad energy.
I try to be positive and do things I feel are good, and I know good things have come back to me. Part of that is being aware when positive events happen in your life, and being greatful for them. I have also worked really hard for the things I achieve, but feel that a positive attitude is what has driven me to get them. We know several very negative people, who have the attitude of 'woe is me', in that nothing good ever happens to them, and, low-and-behold, often negative things do build up in their lives. IMO, mostly because they don't take advantage of situations offered to them, they are too busy being bummed-out about life! There was a study involving some money dropped on the footpath, and people who viewed themselves as lucky found the money, whereas people who thought themselves unlucky always missed it.... Basically if you are positive, you are more receptive to the good things that are out there!  -------------  
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 13 March 2008 at 3:09pm
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Yes and No.
Sometimes no matter how positive you are, things can still go wrong. As for people that a constantly negative, I do find them incredibly draining. and agree that they seem to bring a lot of it on themselves IMHO. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">   [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: Parki
Date Posted: 13 March 2008 at 3:19pm
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Wow, that money study is so intersting Blondy. I can see how that would be correct though!
Fleury, I also agree that bad things still happen in life but IMO you can either get totally bummed about it and dwell on it or you can learn and move on. Thats where the positive/Negative comes in. I agree, negative people are totally draining. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Aprilfools
Date Posted: 13 March 2008 at 3:37pm
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I agree, and being postive makes you feel so much better.
Everyone will have something go wrong at some stage but it's not the end of the world and a positve attitude will help you get through it a lot better. At the end of the day you are responsible for yourself and how you feel. You can choose to dwell on things or you can choose to get over it and concentrate on something else. It's all about attitude. I don't like negative people and find it really draining when they constantly tell you about what has gone wrong in their lives instead of what's gone right. Another negative thing I don't like is when people spend so much time dishing out criticism but you very rarely hear a compliment. |
Posted By: blondy
Date Posted: 13 March 2008 at 4:04pm
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Just wanted to add - bad things have of course happened in my life (i.e. losing Mum when I was 18, and all grandparents & Dad by 27), but it comes down to how you deal with these things, and rather than thinking solely about the bad thing that has happened, you have to look at how you can grow from it, or what other opportunities come along with the bad.
(am not trying to make a pity party LOL! Just pointing out that even when horrible things do happen, there is much to be gained)-------------
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Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 13 March 2008 at 4:16pm
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I totally agree, even tho I am a pessimist (I can't help it, it's in my genes - I inherited anxiety disorder and OCD, if I don't peg my clothes out the right way bad things will happen ). I do think positive thinking can lead to positive outcome, and at the very least to good mental health! -------------  Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 13 March 2008 at 4:37pm
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blondy the way I look at it now after loosing my mum a few years ago, is she can't die twice and as that is the worst thing that has happened to me so far I can live with it.
I think myself incredibly lucky and very fortunate. I think as long as you've got a roof over your head, food on the table and a loving family that's all I need, and the odd bit of chocolate to keep me sweet ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: blondy
Date Posted: 13 March 2008 at 4:41pm
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Totally agree fleury! I think that's why I don't freak out about the tough things I have to do - I know I have coped with more difficult things and come out the other end ok! -------------
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Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 13 March 2008 at 6:46pm
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I'm a the eternal optimist... and I find it funny (not funny haha, funny interesting) that you said things can still go wrong if you are positive. If you were really an optimist/positive then you'd not really consider things 'bad' that happen but find the silver lining.
So yeah, in that way I think that being positive creates positive things to happen to you... but I also think it is the way you look at things ya know? Something could be good or bad depending on who is looking at it. (Generalising here... there are some very obvious sucky things that can happen too!!) Anyway, I get ya Parki 
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Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 13 March 2008 at 7:07pm
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Oh yes Nikki, you are the eternal optimist, that's where all that procrastination was coming from - you always *believed* you would get it done, eventually ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: pepsi
Date Posted: 13 March 2008 at 7:09pm
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I think there was something on Oprah about it once which tied into that top selling DVD "The Secret" which in a roundabout way teaches you all about being positive and how it can improve your life.
The idea with the money experiment is that people who percieve themselves to be "lucky" and therefore optimistic, tend to look for opportunities. On the flip side, negative "unlucky" people don't, and so they don't always notice lucky things happening right in front of them. Positive people usually put a spin on things so that something which a pessimistic person would view as unlucky, is seen as an opportunity to a positive person. |
Posted By: Kels
Date Posted: 13 March 2008 at 7:49pm
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I was going to say that too Yumiko. I heard there is the book called "the secret" and is the same concept of positive energy brings more positive energy etc ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 13 March 2008 at 7:51pm
So *thats* why I haven't won lotto yet!  ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: peachy
Date Posted: 13 March 2008 at 8:23pm
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I have heard great things about that book "The Secret" my MIL swears by it!! I must borrow it from her someday!
I agree that positive people attract positive things, negativity attracts negativity. Negative people are energy zappers!! ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 13 March 2008 at 8:45pm
| that "secret" thing is a load of crap! apparently food will only make you fat "if you believe it". I'm all for being positive but apparently this books says if you truly believe you will win lotto - then you will. good luck with that...well the author is laughing all the way to the bank.... |
Posted By: FionaS
Date Posted: 13 March 2008 at 9:02pm
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I don't believe in Karma or "energy" but I do believe in the power of positive thinking (I believe in God). I also believe there are seasons in our lives and at one time or another we will all have a difficult / negative patch and need the support of others just as we will have times when we need to support others through theirs. We just have to try to ensure that those times are not the norm.
Definately a believer in good deeds and doing unto others as you'd have them do unto you. Very anti-revenge. I guess ultimately, what goes around comes around but not as literally and immediately as some say. I also believe that bad things happen to 'good', positive people. Bad things happening doesn't always mean you've done something bad to cause them. We live in a fallen world and bad things and things we don't understand happen to everyone. However, despite my tired ramble, I do agree that a positive attitude is always a good asset and does make a difference to every aspect of our lives. ------------- Mummy to Gabrielle and Ashley |
Posted By: Rachael21
Date Posted: 13 March 2008 at 10:22pm
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Yip I really believe in karma too. I got Ben believing it too because he used to be really bad for taking the law into his own hands. He know sits back and goes well karma will get them and you know what it always does. I think its that if you look hard enough you can find bad stuff that happens to everyone but they don't always see it as bad IYKWIM.
I do have to say tho my sister just came back from India and over there they are big believers in karma. They basically think that the poor kids on the street were born into that life because they did something bad in a prior life, so they don't really help out people worse off than them. I definately don't believe in that. |
Posted By: Parki
Date Posted: 14 March 2008 at 9:03am
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My Mum bought me The Secret Dvd a couple of years ago before it was a 'big thing' here in NZ.
I watched it in the midst of a huge arguement with my best friend when I was feeling down and like cr*p. I'm the first to admit I thought it was silly, but... It totally transformed my way of thinking. I definately believe if you put positive energy out there you will be rewarded with a happy, positive environment. The Secret IMO is all about the person who watches it and what they want to take from it.....It sure worked and continues working for my Mum. At the end of the day, what have you got to lose? When I said think things will still go wrong, what I meant is of course there will always be things in life that will test us, losing a parent is an unimaginable but like someone else has said, it is all in the way you deal with it. I guess what Im trying to say is there are so many people in this world who are so "Woe is me, nothing ever good happens to me, I have bad luck etc"....... Well theres a reason for it, its becasue they don't ever see positive things or opportunities, like a positive person does - The money experiment demonstrates this perfectly. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: miss
Date Posted: 14 March 2008 at 9:36am
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Lol, people do diss the secret, until they read it. Even the most cynical person has positive stuff to say about it (thoguh the don't look at fat people buit sounds funny!) after actually reading it.
haven't yet - but there is another author that I really want ot read but I can't remember the name of the book - laws of attraction or somehting. Anyway, I am one of the luckiest people I know! And one of the happiest. -------------  
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Posted By: almostthere
Date Posted: 14 March 2008 at 9:44am
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I havnt read it, but i dont diss it. I fully understnad the power of positive thinking and attitudes.
I dont think of myself as an overly positive person, but instead more of a realist. I am a firm beleiver that you can make your own destiny in the way you behave and how you let things affect you. As an example: I had a car accident on Tuesday. I am still sad about it. But i know it has happened for a reason and I just have to trust that I am a good person and whatever bad that has happened will be replaced at some point with something good happening. A good friend of mine is a very negative person, but she is slowly changing her way of thinking, which is great! instead of sitting around saying 'oh, woe is me'. she now says yes, i am sad but i can make this better. Its ok to be sad and let things affect you. But not to the point where it changes your personality.. ------------- http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/2128f6"> 
http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/2128f6 - chart |
Posted By: The_Stuarts
Date Posted: 14 March 2008 at 9:53am
Yep, that's what I think too. A big thing for me is that sometimes I have to do things I don't want to (like be at work away from my baby all day - c'mon lotto) but I'm here, I have little choice in the matter, so I may as well make the most of it and enjoy myself. Every cloud has a silver lining so I look for the positives (like as a working mum I can have champagne lunches, spend more time on the internet, appreciate my daughter more when I am at home because I haven't had a chance to get sick of her toddler tantrums etc...) I also believe in Karma, what comes around goes around, mainly becuase people who are negative or do bad things bring trouble on themselves. ------------- http://lilypie.com">   http://lilypie.com">
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blondy wrote:Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 14 March 2008 at 12:36pm
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Im mostly a positive person, we only live once so we should have a good time right?
I find the phrase "everything happens for a reason " hard to apply to everything tho, I still cant see a reason for my friend dying and not living to see a year wedding anniversary,or her daughter turn one, for example. But i would much rather be positive than negative, tho its not always easy. I used to be friends with a really really negative girl, who had THE worst life (according to her) in the end i slowly drifted away from her, she was just too draining |
Posted By: almostthere
Date Posted: 14 March 2008 at 12:46pm
See, you may not see it now, but there will be a reason why in the greater scheme of things.. Its hard to lose someone and then to see the reason why so close to ther death...  ------------- http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/2128f6">
http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/2128f6 - chart |
Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 14 March 2008 at 1:41pm
hehe - that's why I call myself a 'perfectionist' too - I do the most perfect job I can in the time I leave available! It's all you can ask for really... even if that time works out to be 5 minutes.
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Posted By: Aprilfools
Date Posted: 14 March 2008 at 4:41pm
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If you didn't have bad or unpleasant things happen in your life you wouldn't realise that you have something to be thankful for and you'd take things for granted. Unfortunately negative people tend to take things for granted anyway. You buy them a bunch of flowers to cheer them up or say thanks and they turn around and say well why didn't you get me lillies? or something like that.
And bad things do have to happen in order to challenge you and teach you about yourself. It doesn't mean life is over. In fact if anything it should give you something to look forward to. You can not have good without bad but it is up to you what you want to concentrate on how you want to be. Look for the positives or concentrate on the negatives?? When it comes to people dying it is a very very sad fact of life. I always think that if someone dies it's a very stern reminder that you must not take your loved ones for granted; like try and remember the thousand odd good times or good things someone has done for you rather than concentrating on that one time they ticked you off. Woe is me?? Well you reep what you sow. |
Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 14 March 2008 at 5:46pm
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lol so did i , well Kama, she gave birth at 24 weeks to a little girl then got transferred back down to Nelson where apparently she just left and didn't leave the hospital any contact details......
I agree that when someone dies it helps US remember not to take life for granted and appreciate people more....but thats not really fair on the ones that died, my friend loved life and was so happy, married to the man she loved, brand new bubba, and it was taken from her, and perhaps its taught us , her friend's and family how to be thankful for what we've got, but why should her daughter have to learn anything-she didn't even get a chance to know her mum
sorry, I just miss her |
Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 14 March 2008 at 9:38pm
What rubbish, eating McDonald's is still going to make you fat regardless of what your 'believe'. The only reason I truly believe that I won't win Lotto is cause I never buy a ticket!! ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: 3boys
Date Posted: 14 March 2008 at 9:47pm
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I am a really positive person and always have been, and to some extent I agree with you, but this view seems to me to be a little simplistic.
To be blunt - all the positivity in the world didn't help when my fist child was born disabled. Although we remain positive always for him, life can be hard and made even harder when you have to watch your children's pain. Perhaps we should judge those who a negative less - some days you are just damn well pissed with the world. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: The_Stuarts
Date Posted: 14 March 2008 at 9:59pm
That's totally understandable. You should remember your loved ones after they go and they wil live on through you (I know cliche). I believe that once we pass we go somewhere better and death is only actually hard on those left behind. I do also believe that everything happens for a reason. As someone said earlier it's hard to know what that reason is, especially as you mourn. My DH lost his dad when he was only 3 years old and he doesn't have many memories of him. Had his dad been alive there are plenty of circumstances that would have changed - his mother probably wouldn't have moved to Wellington so she could work 2 jobs, in which case we wouldn't have met which means the most precious treasure of our lives - Michaela - would never have been concieved. The important thing for your friends daughter is that you don't forget her and you make sure she knows what a wonderful woman her mum was.  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: The_Stuarts
Date Posted: 14 March 2008 at 10:07pm
Nothing wrong with being pissed off with the world somedays, I just don't understand those that are pissed off with the world everyday. Putting a positive spin on things I believe that my brothers disability meant that growing up I didn't need to learn tolerance of those who were different from me, I recognised each person as individuals and never thought of anyone as able or disabled - there was no difference (some people have brown hair, some are blond, some can't walk well, others don't talk properly - it didn't matter). As an adult and a parent learning more about my brothers illness (which caused his disability), what my parents went through, and the way they coped has given me enourmous respect for and understanding of them. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 14 March 2008 at 10:33pm
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yeah, I guess at the moment its too fresh to think anything but bad about it,I guess when i realise something good has come from her death , even if its a few years away, thats when i know i'll be ok.
completely agree one hundred percent with you about your brothers disability, my sister is special needs and because of this i grew up around special kids (and now so is Caitlyn for which im grateful) and learnt the important lesson of beauty being on the inside |
Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 15 March 2008 at 8:50am
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i did work with a guy in japan who justHATED everything. seriously, he grew some tulips and they died off, as tulips do, and he came into work ranting and raving about the "japanese wind that killed (his) tulips". everything that went wrong was japan's "fault" in some way. he got a stone in his shoe- huge catastrophy about stupid japanese stones (nothing about the stupid NZ shoe that he had in the first place), and when the train was late.....
I ended up yelling at him one day and telling him (i was preggers with jake - that al his negativity was causing me stress and "killing the baby" - aaah, i was such a professional boss. |