Just wondering
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Category: Have A Baby?
Forum Name: First baby? Second or more?
Forum Description: Want help? Need support? Want tips? Men and women share advice and tips in this supportive community
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=16276
Printed Date: 13 September 2025 at 11:30pm
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Topic: Just wondering
Posted By: myfullhouse
Subject: Just wondering
Date Posted: 12 April 2008 at 9:00pm
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I have been wondering alot lately, and after reading many of the postts, why people try different methods to choose the gender of their baby and why people find out the gender at one of their scans. I was never worried about trying for a particular gender baby and didn't know what gender we were having until Jack was born. I am a very organised person (well I was before jack arrived) which is why I think quite a few people were surprised that we didn't find out.
I don't mean to offend anyone, I am just curious. So why did you find out? ------------- Lindsey 
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Replies:
Posted By: .Mel
Date Posted: 12 April 2008 at 9:05pm
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I found out just to confirm my "feeling" about what I was having, and with all three I was right. Also DH really wanted to find out.
Also with Conor I was a single mum so wanted to know who I'd be spending my life with :) ------------- Mr Mellow (16) Miss Attitude (8) Destructa Kid (3) 
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Posted By: ElfsMum
Date Posted: 12 April 2008 at 9:14pm
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i really wanted to know...for similar reason to mel..but i had my heart set on a boy and wanted to know if i was right.. also a lot of relatives wanted a girl so i wanted to know..and i felt like I deserved to know after going through the mc..lol.. and it did help me 'bond' more with him too.. also i assumed they would have to look closely because my brother has a genetic bone disease so i figured i would find out then as well(in the end didnt have a CVS) ..at the time i couldnt understand why people didnt find out.. but next time we may not..not sure:) ------------- Mum to two amazing boys! |
Posted By: popcorn
Date Posted: 12 April 2008 at 9:19pm
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We decided to at the scan when the lady asked, it was so close so we just said yes. We werent going to find out but am really glad we did as it allowed me to bond with the idea of having a baby alot more (surprise pregnancy) and get organised in terms of buying ahead on special etc ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Paws
Date Posted: 12 April 2008 at 9:21pm
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I had to find out becuase I'm so darn nosey!! I can't even wait a week or whatever to find out what my Christmas are so I was not waiting a full nine months to find out the gender!
For us it also a lot nicer to be able to think in terms of "her" instead of "the baby" or even worse "it" and we could shop accordingly for clothes etc. 
We didn't try for a particular gender though, we would have been happy either way. Heck the month we fell pregnant was the month we weren't even trying!  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: baalamb
Date Posted: 12 April 2008 at 9:23pm
| I'm a planner, and like to have plans in my life. For where DH and I were at in our lives when we found out we were pg, Ashlee wasn't in that plan for at least a couple more years! So basically, for us to find out the gender was so that I could at least feel in control of something, and then I could plan for her arrival by buying clothes etc. Will find out for the next one too, whether the next is planned or not! I don't regret finding out at all. I loved knowing! We didn't name her until she was born so we still had something to look forward to, so to speak. |
Posted By: ElfsMum
Date Posted: 12 April 2008 at 9:34pm
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we named him that day:) and we dont regret it either(well i dont DH never wanted to know) ------------- Mum to two amazing boys! |
Posted By: Mama2two
Date Posted: 12 April 2008 at 9:43pm
Yup, Nosey here too  Plus I couldn't wait to start shopping and wanted to know what colours to buy and how to decorate the nursery.
We also named Samantha the day we found out, so it was lovely to refer to her at Sam for 5 months. By the time I had her I felt like I knew her already - and she suited the name because she just was Samantha  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Snickerdoodle
Date Posted: 12 April 2008 at 9:52pm
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We found out because we're too impatient.
DH really wanted a girl, as did I, but at the end of the day we'd have been happy with either. One of the biggest reasons was so we could bond before she was born. I didn't like the idea of saying "it" about the bump. I liked that I could say "ooh! She's being a ratbag in there!!". We'd picked her name before we even knew but we kept it to ourselves, never referring to her as "Hannah" until she'd arrived, so we kept her name as a surprise to everyone, even though they (and us) knew she was a girl. But I completely understand why people don't, too. I often thought how lovely it would've been to find out when she was born... but I'm glad we chose (and were able) to find out. ------------- 
http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: BabyKiwi
Date Posted: 12 April 2008 at 11:59pm
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When I found out I was pregnant I was adament (sp?) that I didn't want to know the sex of our baby, although throughout the pregnancy I had an inkling that it was a girl!
I had a daughter 10 years ago who died due to SIDS so there was a few people including my mw that suggested it would be a good idea to find out as it would help with the emotional aspect of it all. I'm glad I did because it hit me hard emotionally when we found out, I can't imagine what I would have been like if I hadn't found out!!! Although, if we have any more kids, I don't think I'll find out! |
Posted By: Jessica
Date Posted: 13 April 2008 at 8:09am
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Sort of the same as babykiwi, with my first preg where I lost my boys at 20weeks we had not found out and this time we did from the emotional side, I needed to feel like I had some control over everything since with my boys we had really had no control over anything after we had the 19 week scan.
Next time I don't think we will find out. I really don't mind what sex. Looking back we are really pleased to have found out we were having a boy again, gave me time to deal with everything before he arrived on the scene! ------------- 
Our con-joined boys 20 wk |
Posted By: Mum2ET
Date Posted: 13 April 2008 at 9:16am
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We found out because I really wanted a little girl- as soon as I got pregnant I knew I was having a girl, but everyone told that mebecause of that I was going to have a boy- and if I was having a boy I wanted a bit of time to get used to it. I have nothing against have a boy...but after growing up with 2 younger brothers and always wanting a sister I guess having a daughter is the next best thing. Also I am a bit of a planner, so I liked the fact that I could everything organised and the nursary painted and decorated etc. For our 2nd would also probably find out, but more so we can organised ( not fussed if our 2nd is a girl or boy). and because I don't know if I could wait the whole 9 months. ------------- Mum to Ella (5) and Tom (2) |
Posted By: myfullhouse
Date Posted: 13 April 2008 at 9:18am
I am a big planner too - you should have seen the planning that went into our UK holiday a few years back!  . Yet I was happy to wait the 9mths, we painted the room yellow and I bought yellow, white and green clothes. I can understand many of the reasons mentioned for finding out. DH wanted to know and he said he wants to know for any future babies, but the meanie that I am said no, I'm doing the work and I don't want to know. Plus he couldn't keep a secret to save himself!! I found out I was pg when I was only about 4wks, told him and within days he had spilt the news to my brother!! ------------- Lindsey
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Posted By: jack_&_charli
Date Posted: 13 April 2008 at 9:46am
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we found out with jack because
1- i really wanted a girl and thought i'd need time to get my head around it if it was a boy (only needed an hr or 2) 2- we were renovating a house after re-location so i wanted to do the babies room in a funky girl/boy colour 3- we wanted to get everything ready before he arrived 4- i'm soooooo impatient! with charli, we didn't find out because we had everything already and i thought she was a boy anyway. it was fun having a big pink shopping spree ------------- http://www.alternatickers.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 13 April 2008 at 9:54am
| Curiousity got the better of us and buying all white/green/yellow stuff was really boring. All the super cute stuff I thought was blue or pink so I wanted to be able to buy everything I wanted before he arrived. |
Posted By: Candkids
Date Posted: 13 April 2008 at 11:09am
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weirdly enough
i have really bazar dreams which more often than not prove to be true. i drempt i was pregnant and a week later we found out i was :) i have so far had this dream about numerous people i know and then found out within a week or 2 that they are preg. then i had a dream i still remember it, it was a room filled with those big florist baloons and they all said its a boy! and they were all blue. i told DH and he thought i was crazy, and he was sure we were having a girl. and it was a boy ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  DD 10.5yrs DS 6yrs DS 11mths 5 little angles watching from above |
Posted By: tishy
Date Posted: 13 April 2008 at 11:48am
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Initially I didn't want to know and DH did, which is funny cos I'm the one who shakes the xmas pressies under the tree
Anyway once we found out it was twins we figured that was surprise enough
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Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 13 April 2008 at 1:59pm
Same here, i wanted to know who i would be spending my life with, whether the new person who was going to be taking over my heart would be a girl or a boy, it wouldnt have mattered either way but i wanted to know. Next time i'll try to control myself from finding out |
.Mel wrote:Posted By: MyBelly
Date Posted: 13 April 2008 at 2:01pm
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I was adamant i wasnt going to find out with Eden, DH said he wanted to know (we knew with Izobel) so he could 'plan' but really it was because he was JUST NOSEY!
But then i saw Edens legs really clearly at the scan realised there was nothing in between them and because i thought she was a girl already i said "shes a girl isnt she?" and the scanner lady confirmed it, i was so please we found out in the end, but for the next one we wont find out! |
Posted By: james
Date Posted: 13 April 2008 at 2:40pm
i just wanted to know which colours to buy for clothes lol ------------- <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b4.lilypie.com/nLJ5p13.png" alt="Lilypie 4th Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a> |
Posted By: MorgansMum
Date Posted: 13 April 2008 at 7:02pm
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We have found out both times. I tell everyone its so that we can be prepared but it's really just because we are both just nosy ------------- Morgan, Libby http://www.TickerFactory.com/"> 
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Posted By: NovemberMum
Date Posted: 13 April 2008 at 10:05pm
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when we were ttc we weren't trying for a particular gender but deep down I really wanted a girl.
my main reasons are that I was wanting to give my husband's parents a granddaughter..they have two sons and their youngest son has two boys and him and his wife are not having anymore children. I have no idea if we will have a 2nd and even if we do and #1 had been a boy there are on guarantees #2 will be a girl. We didn't have a scan as I didn't want to know.. I have to admit I was scared I was going to have a boy so I decided I would rather not know and just find out once I had baby. but I got my girl and well Im pretty happy :) ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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