Co-ed or uni-sex school?
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Topic: Co-ed or uni-sex school?
Posted By: kebakat
Subject: Co-ed or uni-sex school?
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 2:56pm
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Did you go to a co-ed or uni-sex school?
Would you rather your children went to co-ed or uni-sex schools? I just wondered because I went to a co-ed rough as high school and loved it. DH went to boys high. He said he finds it funny when he goes into co-ed high schools (for work) and sees "couples" walking around the school etc. Daniel will end up going to a co-ed probably. |
Replies:
Posted By: AliaDawn
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 3:01pm
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I've been to 1 co-ed primary, 1 co-ed intermediate, 1 uni-sex high school, and 2 co-ed high schools... I think it honestly depends on the school. I think primary co-ed is definately best, but I think I umm... "concentrated" better at my first (girls only) high school than my 2nd... (co-ed) by the 3rd (also co-ed) I had grown up a bit, (6th form) and I don't think I actually dated anyone at the school... were all older guys by then, so guys were just good friends, and it was great. I think it is easier to find a uni-sex school that *works* than a co-ed. -------------  
 
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Posted By: Mum2ET
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 3:03pm
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I went a all girls school and didn't find it so bad. At this stage am undecided what type of school Ella will go it- probably think it will more depend on the actual school rather than it being uni-sex or co-ed. ------------- Mum to Ella (5) and Tom (2) |
Posted By: AliaDawn
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 3:03pm
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I've also heard boys in general perform better in co-ed schools, and girls in uni-sex, but that could be wrong. It does make some sense to me having been to both though. -------------
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Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 3:03pm
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We all went single sex from intermediate and at first gasp I'd say I'd send my girls to single sex schools too coz there's less distraction lol.
BUT one of the all girls schools I went to had the highest teenage pregnancy rate in the country... AND my mum is one of four girls and went to an all girls school and she said she struggled to relate to men as a young adult as she'd had very limited interaction with them. We didn't have the same prob as there are 2 boys and 2 girls in my family so my brothers had friends around regularly etc. so boys weren't such a mystery. But seeing as I will have four girls that is something I will consider. -------------  Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 3:08pm
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DH struggled with girls once he was at uni where as for me talking to guys was easy.
I spent a week working with nga tawa (girls boarding school) and it nearly drove me nuts - catty behaviour - so I think I worked better with guys around too. It was lots more fun (not in the dodgy way either lol) to have guys sense of humour around. |
Posted By: arohanui
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 3:10pm
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Oo interesting topic. I know that there's been some studies that kids achieve better at single sex schools (probably cos they don't have that distraction or trying to show off to the opposite sex). I think it affects boys more than girls - and I can see the value in having an all boys school where boys can be boys and do man things, and learn in the style that seems to work for them (huge generalisation).
But those same studies haven't looked into the social aspect of it so I don't know. I think if the student is getting that social interaction with the other sex somewhere else (like a youth group or sports or something) then that wouldn't matter so much. I just remember going with my school choir to an all girls school, and all the girls were literally hanging out of the windows oogling and calling out at all the guys in our choir. Granted they were good looking Island boys, but that would have never happened at my school! Maybe just cos we also saw how gross they were lol and that they were just normal. Soooo I haven't really answered the question - but I think it will depend on what our kids are like when they're older. If they're having difficulty at a co-ed school, I'd be tempted to try single sex - so long as they still had that interaction with the opposite sex through somewhere else. I know personally I had heaps of close "guy friends" when I was a teenager, but the more I think about it, the more I realise they were actually from church rather than school. ------------- Mama to DS1 (5 years), DS2 (3 years) and... http://alterna-tickers.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: ElfsMum
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 3:11pm
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my Mum went to single sex and hated it.. and i think i would have too.but thats just the kind of people we are(more tomboyish) she had 5 brothers just hated the cattiness of her school..(but my co-ed was VERY catty too)
having said that i have friends who were happy at both..i would prefer Ethan to go to co-ed but it will be a lot of his decision and where we are zoned.. its true what they say about the boys doing better at co-ed... educationally proven that girls do better at single sex school.. anyway our kids will probably go to co-ed school. (though DH wants them to go to the Catholic school down the road which would then lead to private single sex ....so hmm we will have to talk more about exactly what we think is best! ------------- Mum to two amazing boys! |
Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 3:15pm
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I went to a co-ed school and feel it is important for Han to do that too. We didn't get obsessed with boys - well, atleast not the boys at our school because they were so familiar!! When we did go out with guys from our school it was usually a lot more based on friendship.
The guys from boys high were shocking!! Terribly chauvinistic and sex obsessed... I don't know whether that was just those particular boys but it seems to be a pattern in single sex boys schools. I know if I had a son, there'd be no way in hell I'd send him there. I do feel that it isn't as much of a big deal for girls though. And I do know people who went to unisex schools and feel that co-ed is terrible! |
Posted By: peachy
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 3:18pm
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I went to a single sex school and loved it! I had more guy friends than girl friends anyway so wouldn't have bothered me either way. The reason my parents decided I was to go to a single sex school is because I excelled in male dominated subjects eg: woodwork, metalwork and vehicle mechanics. I was top of our school for those subjects the whole way through high school and was second in the country for woodwork in school C. Infact I am pretty good at most hands-on type things; eg sewing etc.
I really wanted to be a mechanice but my Dad wouldn't have it, go figure when he sent me to a girls school so I could excell at those subjects 
Gosh I make myself out to be a right tomboy don't I, I'm not really!! ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: BellaBoo
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 3:23pm
Hope your not talking about Rotorua Boys High there Nikki Lots of my boyfriends were from there hehe
I have been to a co-ed and a single sex school. The co-ed school was a much better school and that is where Bella will go (if we are still living here). The boys tended to make the girls less scatty ad catty. ------------- http://lilypie.com">   http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: MrsMojo
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 3:33pm
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I went to co-ed schools all the way through until I moved to Wgtn in 7th form and went to a girls only and couldn't believe how excitable and girly the girls were when we had classes at the local boys school. It seemed very odd to me.
I have read studies that show that girls achieve higher at uni-schools while boys work best at co-ed but I think it depends on the child. -------------  
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Posted By: caraMel
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 4:10pm
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I went to an all girls high school and left early, largely because I couldn't stand the cattiness and backstabbing any more.
My mum chose to send me to single sex because she didn't want me to be distracted by boys, but I honestly believe it had the opposite effect. Boys were such a novelty and we didn't learn the social skills so that we could just be friends with guys. Every guy was a potential boyfriend for us. I'm adamant that my kids will go to coed schools, provided there a good ones in our area. ------------- Mel, Mummy to E: 6, B: 4 and: 
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Posted By: minik8e
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 4:18pm
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I went to a co-ed (Catholic) primary, then a girls only (Catholic) intermediate, girls only (Catholic) college until 4th form, then 2 co-ed colleges, then a girls only. The co-ed girls dealt with boys soooo much better and didn't lose their heads, like the girls only students did. The Catholic college I went to had the highest pregnancy rate in Taranaki and I think the lack of association with guys helped there. Personally though, our future daughters will most likely go to the same Catholic girls college that I did, because the quality of the education that I got there was far superior to that of anywhere else, and purely for that reason. DP went to co-ed his whole life, which was best for him - he wasn't hugely academic and it suited him.
ETA: I have been to all the colleges in our area that have girls, so yeah, IMO that college is the best education provider. |
Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 4:18pm
Oh yes I am!! And yes, mine too 
Interestingggg... how old are you? |
Topsy wrote:Posted By: T_Rex
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 5:01pm
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I went single sex, but all the rest of my siblings (3 sisters, 2 brothers) went co-ed. I loved my school and did really well there, but I think that was more because of the school than because it was girls-only. Although I think I had a good personality for an all-girls environment because I don't have time for cattiness. We certainly had a group of catty "popular" girls, but their social power was that everyone wanted to join them, and they had the power to exclude those they didn't want... I had no interest in joining them, so they had no power over me, and I had a very pleasant and productive education!
The big difference between mine and my siblings' educations, as far as I could tell, was that at my school, I commanded a certain respect for being *smart* (I was dux etc) and had a really good group of friends, whereas my older sister got bullied because of it (she was also dux), and my 2 younger sisters and my brothers have been very careful not to be smart, which I think is a real shame because they are very clever people and could have done very well academically. My youngest brother is seriously supersmart (he used to test me for my school C exams when he was 7!) but he didn't even get into Vet school last year, because he never learnt how to apply himself at highschool, even though he's more than smart enough. So I think it was really stupid of my parents to send their intellectual kids to a school where it was a big social no-no to achieve academicly. So after all that waffle... perhaps it depends more on the individual school than whether it is single-sex or co-ed. Certainly I never had any issues relating to guys and I think I personally benefitted from being 18 before I was really in an environment where I was interested in boyfriends, because I was grown-up enough to deal with it... I ended up marrying him! ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: KABJ99
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 5:20pm
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I went to a co-ed school and loved it. We never really had to much of a problem with the girl/guy thing as very few 'couples' were formed at our school. People tended to date from other schools. It certainly did make it easy to interact and get used to dealing with the opposite sex as seeing them as people, not as sexual objects. Think it probably comes down to the particular school, the environment and the mix of teachers and pupils you have there.
However, two of the single sex private girls schools in the area had a very high pregancy rates and got busted several times for students growing dope on school premises. Noticeable that when I went to university and lived in the hostels it was the single sex, private school kids who totally seemed to loose it when it came to managing their time and study, alcohol, dealing with people of the opposite sex, number of sexual partners. They had higher drop out, failure and pregnancy rates. They just didn't seem to know how to deal with the freedom and the personal responsibility for yourself and your behaviour that goes with it. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
Kelly |
Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 5:31pm
| I have thought about this a lot, as me and DH have a similar problem. we've decided to wait and see what kinda kids the boys are. If you have a child who benefits from VERY strong boundaries and a kind of military regime - boys high. if you have a more artistic child, then the management at boys high will seem more like bullying. |
Posted By: miss
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 5:53pm
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Single sex public. Lily will be going to single sex or coed private. Haven't totally decided yet as there is still a way to go till intermediate. -------------  
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Posted By: shaz
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 6:54pm
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Well it's all very real for me at the moment Natasha starts high school next year.
Over the years I've swung between both options but in the end have decided to go co-ed as we have three girls and I'd hate her to be uncomfortable around boys. Hopefully she won't get too distracted by them like her mother did . ------------- Mum to Natasha Aroha 9/12/1995, Alexandra Makareta Waimarie 22/4/1998 and....Alyssa Frances Hopaea 18/03/2007 
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Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 8:09pm
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I too think it depends on the child. Mike went to boys high and hated it as he wasn't into the sports side of things and boys high here is like if they're not into sports then they're not worth it.
Girls, I dunno. I went to a co-ed school all the way, I don't think i would send them to a single-sex school. ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja 
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Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 8:14pm
DH hated that about palmy boys. But he was into the music scene so him being in a band semi made up for wanting nothing to do with the sport or college house lol |
Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 8:15pm
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I went to a all girls catholic school, it was very catty.
However I am concerned that state schools don't teach the same values that are taught at catholic schools. They don't seem to teach any. We are lucky as Palmy has a very good co-ed catholic school which serves both. I also don't want my children going to a large school where they become a number. Girls High is just too big for my liking. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">   [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 8:26pm
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I chose to go to Palmy Girls (I bused over everyday from Feilding). I was given the choise of Palmy Girls or an other high school in Palmy ( a coed one) and I chose Palmy Girls. I didn't have any problems with boys growing up but some girls in my year were very strange with boys. DH went to the same coed school as Janine and I think he enjoyed it. For the boys I will offer them a couple of school and let them decided from there. I would prefer a single sex school for them (high school only) but if it's not them then thats ok. ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: Jennz
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 8:29pm
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I went to a state co-ed. My girls will be going to a private single sex! Lol I agree that it depends on the child as well though- I just hope both mine are the type that like strong boundaries, cos thats what they'll be getting
Although I have heard of some co-ed schools separating the classes so that they can mingle during breaks but they take their classes with only girls or only boys. I think thats a brilliant idea. Best of both really.
See, I think that its the parents responsibility to teach values, not a school. ------------- Jen, Charlotte 7 & Kate 3 
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 8:32pm
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I agree Jennz, but if what's taught at home is either contradicted at school or not reinforced it can be an uphill struggle.
And by the time children reach high school, its more about their peers than parents. For those of you who went co-ed, how well did you do academically? ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: Jennz
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 8:38pm
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I topped my school for school C and got an A bursary- I think that was in spite of my schooling rather than because of it though! I'm one of those 'cram the night before and pass with flying colours' people that annoys all the real hard workers
I guess the thing with values is that you need to instil as much as you can, as well as you can- so that when they are out there making their own decisions they have that strong value system already instilled so they make positive choices. I see what you mean about minimising the bad influences though! I guess its about doing your best as a parent, then putting them out there and hoping you've done a good enough job  ------------- Jen, Charlotte 7 & Kate 3
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Posted By: aimeejoy
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 8:39pm
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I went to co-ed for both primary and secondary. I did really well academically, bit of a geek really, and was top or near the top of all my classes. I found that if you did well and respected the teachers, they returned the respect and went more out of their way to help you.
Would definitely not send my girls to girls only schools after seeing the state of most of these girls once they left home for uni. Once they were free to do as they pleased they just had no idea how to relate to guys as friends, and had far more boys through their rooms than anyone else! In saying that tho, I loved my high school experience, but at the moment there is no way I would send my kids there. It has just gone downhill so much with a bad principal. ------------- Aimee Hannah 22/10/05 Greer 11/02/08 |
Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 8:40pm
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I went to Rangitikei College which is well and truely known as the crap high school of the area as people who get kicked out of schools in wanganui usually end up at Rag.
Despite that kind of rep it was a great school. I got very good marks in 6th and 7th form. Got into vet school so I'd say I did well academically. I found that especially in 6th and 7th form that the teachers were excellent. We had great intimate classes, it was soooo friendly and fun and yet all our 7th form class (except for 3 I can think of) have ended up going to uni/polytech/military etc. |
Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 8:45pm
lol I think I'm the same, or similar at least. In our classes we learnt what we were taught really well. I never studied before exams until I went to Uni yet I was at the top of my classes
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Posted By: Bobbie
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 9:10pm
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DH went to a single sex school and he was bullied badly. My best friend went to a single sex school and went on to uni with no clue how to interact with guys (by her own admission).
I went to a co-ed and some of my best friends were guys. I think like Liz said, although the studies show that academically children (especially boys) do better at single sex schools these studies don't take the social aspect into consideration. So I think it's likely that we'll do co-ed for all our children. Of course having a girl I concede that it is an easier decision as they do fine academically in co-ed schools anyway. -------------  
 
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Posted By: Bubbaloo
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 9:12pm
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We both went to co-ed schools and James will be doing the same. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  Was danni-chick Mum to James My Angel 28/07/08 |
Posted By: yummymummy
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 10:29pm
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We've both been co-ed but I'm actually thinking uni-sex for the girls. From what I've read, girls tend to do better in uni-sex schools but we haven't really given it much more thought at this stage. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: cat007
Date Posted: 17 April 2008 at 10:36pm
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I went to every type of school possible. Private school & then small country school in primary years, intermediate was also home schooled, secondary was first correspondence, single-sex high school and finally a co-ed high school.
I dont think it matters much as to whether you go to a single-sex or co-ed. I found that the study & learning was the same but at the co-ed we had better discussions and more diversity in conversations etc. It was different dynamics but the outcome was still the same. I dont know but it may be different for boys. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  [/url http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: james
Date Posted: 18 April 2008 at 7:43am
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i went to co-ed and was bullyed all the way thur school my brother went to co-ed aswell and thrived my outher little brother went to single sex and thrived and my little sister went to single sex and was bullyed it relly depends on the kid and the school i have james pramily all sorted but havent mande a chocis for collge yet ------------- <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b4.lilypie.com/nLJ5p13.png" alt="Lilypie 4th Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a> |