What would you do?
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Category: General Chat
Forum Name: General Chat
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URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17529
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Topic: What would you do?
Posted By: sunnyhoney
Subject: What would you do?
Date Posted: 23 May 2008 at 11:29am
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MIL sent me an email after I sent her one asking her to go to family counselling with us. Her email is basically a tirade at me and then she ends by saying she is too busy to go to more counselling (she's been going to hers by herself)
My counsellor says I should ignore it and not reply to her, which I have been doing. Now one of her students is leaving and wants to see Joy before she goes. MIL is complaining that I haven't replied to her email...and wants to keep up appearances for the students 
What would you do? Feel like I am stuck. ------------- Mum to: Joy Emily 1.05am 27/09/07 7lb 3oz Austin Paul 12.47pm 18/04/10 10lb 8oz |
Replies:
Posted By: MummyFreckle
Date Posted: 23 May 2008 at 11:35am
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Do you actually "care" if the student gets to see Joy before they leave? TBH given the history with the MIL, I would be tempted to just ignore her. If the student desperatley wants to see Joy, then they can come to you. It sounds like you might be getting to the point where you have to just make the relationship civil, but do what is right for you, DH and Joy.
------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: MrsMojo
Date Posted: 23 May 2008 at 11:37am
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Sounds like it's all about her and what she looks like to other people. If that's the case then stuff her.
It's not worth it if it's going to upset you further. Happy mummy = happy baby and that's what's important. -------------  
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Posted By: MonicaMouse
Date Posted: 23 May 2008 at 11:48am
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The nasty response would be that you are too busy, after all if she's too busy too help you out, aren't you too busy to help her out? Is she wanting her student to see Joy with her - so it's an excuse for her to see Joy too?
Ok nastiness aside (and that was nasty of me) I agree with what Sam and MrsMojo have said. What do you really want to do? Do you know this student, what type of a relationship do the 2 of you have? Is meeting the student with just Joy (and no MIL) something that you would consider? Oh and I would get DH to give the answer to his mother.  ------------- 
Blair 15/10/2007 Daniel 30/07/2009 |
Posted By: sunnyhoney
Date Posted: 23 May 2008 at 11:56am
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Dh is already so in the middle, I feel for him...
Sounds like she wants us to pick up the student to see Joy without her. Which I would be fine with... But feel like why am I/we the one doing all the running around? They only live 5 mins away / 1/2 hour walk...And we are busy (honestly busy). Don't really know the student that well. Just acquaintances really. No tie there at all. So over getting roped into her little games. ------------- Mum to: Joy Emily 1.05am 27/09/07 7lb 3oz Austin Paul 12.47pm 18/04/10 10lb 8oz |
Posted By: cuppatea
Date Posted: 23 May 2008 at 12:01pm
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I would just reply and say that you are too busy to come over but the student is welcome to come to yours at such and such a time. That way you aren't saying no but you also aren't going completely out the way to accomodate her. ------------- 
 
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Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 23 May 2008 at 12:03pm
| If they want to see Joy, make them make the effort to get off their butt. Don't run around for them if you are busy. |
Posted By: Shezamumof3
Date Posted: 23 May 2008 at 12:15pm
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I agree with Stacey. Make them come to you if its that importnant that the student see's joy. ------------- |
Posted By: sunnyhoney
Date Posted: 23 May 2008 at 2:57pm
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well here's a blindside....DH told me today that she has agreed to go to the counselling together.....
That's what we wanted but now I'm really nervous!! I think I'm just worried that she will just lie her way through it to make herself look good in front of the counsellors and therefore make out like it's me that is the problem. ------------- Mum to: Joy Emily 1.05am 27/09/07 7lb 3oz Austin Paul 12.47pm 18/04/10 10lb 8oz |