Whatever you want to call it, im having one now so leave now or feel free to tantrum along with me......

MY LIFE HAS BEEN SHYT recently and I have been haivng the worse time of it.

All started with the Ex partner the one who left when Alize was one week old and I find out he also has a 7mth old to my Ex best friend... SO I get over that anyway..

NOW

Has just had another baby like 3 weeks ago, and him and this new girl are living at his parents. WHy oh why is it effecting me sooo badly, I mean I am soo much better off without him as he really is a bum who sponges off every girl he meets. Mercedes is such a daddies girl and even tho he is hardly ever around to see her or Alize for that matter she loves him dearly. So recently she wanted to stay with her Nana and Papa (her dad and GF plus baby live there) but I havent yet told her about this new baby. She will be devastated I mean it has really sucked for me the pass 3 weeks but nothing is worse than haviong to face Mercedes with this awful situation yet again.  OMGosh I still get tears in my eyes when I had to tell her about the Brother she has 7mths older than Alize (which she is really confused about cos she cant understand her dad having 2 babies in one year) She took that really badly and was out of control for ages where she even stabbed her older sister with a knife when they were fighting doing the dishes. It took her a whole year to get over but I had to tell her b'cos she sees her cousins from Dad's side a lot and they would have told her so I wanted it to come frm me so she knows I will always be truthful to her

BUT ARGGGHHH again I have to break her little heart....

This reminds of the call I got from the teacher in tears one day asking me to come in for a meeting when I asked why she said, "every morning we have morning prey and they go around in a circle and the kids each says a prey, everyday for 2 months Mercedes has been saying , please god bring my dad home"  Next minute im sobbing to the teacher on the phone...Embarasshing (sp?)

OMGosh life can get bloody damn hard and I usually dont like to whoa is me too much because I am too busy with my family, working and studying for that but GAHHHHH I feel like shyt!!!

Aww thankyou OB mummies, I can always count on support here when the chips are down.

funlvn wrote: Awww Kels. I hope you feel ok soon. regarding Mercedes, does she still want her Dad to come home? Has he been with this new girl long? (As in, would Mercedes have noticed she was pregnant?) Is there any chance she could be excited about the new baby? I feel for you, and really hope Mercedes is ok when you tell her

Yes Mercedes still wants her Dad to come home. Her Dad has been with 2 GF over the past year and Mercedes only knew of the one who was my Ex BFF, so when I found out he had moved this new girl and baby into his parents house I told her about the new GF and her name. Mercedes was horrified but I just reassured her that her father still loved her. I didnt brooch the subject about the baby as I thought it was better to just feed one piece of info at a time.

I have no choice but to tell her tomorrow as I have to take her to the parents place to try on her flower girl dress her Nana is making her and I have to be measured for my Bridesmaid dress as we are both in SIL wedding party. I dont think her Dad or the GF will be there but MErcedes cousins will and of course talk about the new baby.

I'm so sorry Kels. 

As you know my niece is similar (she has 4 brothers and sisters all by different mums).  She is different in that she didn't meet her dad until she was 6 yo but she was really excited about spending time with him and after meeting him and some of her siblings she spoke to her dad on the phone weekly and he sent her gifts regularly.  Then at 7yo she called him up (he lives in Dn) and told him that she doesn't want anything to do with him anymore because she doesn't like the type of person he is.  She asked him to stop calling her and not to send her gifts anymore.

It really sux that these 2 little girls are faced with situations that we as adults wouldn't want to deal with but they can show amazing maturity.  I am so sorry for Mercedes but I do beleive that you are raising a strong little lady and she will one day see her dad for what he really is and then my pity goes to him because he will have stuffed up what could have been a beautiful father/daughter relationship.

Good luck with the discussion

Aww Kels what a $hitty situation to be in.'s to you.

Teresa he doesnt have 3 kids he has 6 by three different woman.... Of course when I meet him he had 2 to one lady and I had one and together we had Mercedes then something must have happened maybe a head injury b'cos next thing I know 6 years later I have just had second together and then within 20mths he all of a sudden has 2 other children with 2 other woman....Yep a head injury...

Thankyou all for your support. I am telling Mercedes tomorrow as she is going for her fitting after school so will let you all know how it goes.

funlvn wrote: Just wondering... because it came through at school before are you going to advise them that she may need some extra TLC for the next little while? It could be helpful for them to know, and her teacher can let you know if its affecting her at school. Could be random, but if she knows it upsets you she may try to hide how its affecting her and it could come out in other ways. again

I like that idea about talking to the teacher. Wil do first thing Monday morning.

Best of luck for tomorrow Kels. I agree talking to her teacher as well just so they know.

LOL T

Didnt go out today as I didnt want to return home after dark with the crazy psycho from yesterday.

I don't blame you Kels. Will you do it soon???

Today is the day. We are going to have coffeee with Leish first then its off to the grandparents/dads house.

Her Dad probably wont be there as he is always out and about but I think being with her family and eeing that she is still part of the family may help the situation. Im soooo glad Alize is too young and is oblivious to all this carnage.

Have fun with coffee with Leish. Best of luck for afterwards.

It was a complete disaster. Just when I think he cant get any worse he does.

Mercedes is a mess and not happy at all. she said "I cant believe a dad can have heaps of children". She kept saying she doesnt understand and is feeling very sad.

We ended up stoping in at her Gparents first as Mercedes wanted to go there while I was at Leish's house. Her father and girlfriend were there hiding in the bedroom, next thing hs is screaming and swearing about us being there (like he owns the place ) That was my que to get out of there with my poor daughter who was in tears. I went into the grandparents as the his mother is making the bridesmaid dresses and wanted to measure me and Sades had to try on her flower girl dress. The Grandfather was crying as he felt sorry for sades and just kept saying stay, we love you and the kids. I said sorry but Sades needs to leave and I dont think it was an environment I want my kids in. 

Sades dad then came and was calling out to her, I think he wanted to apolgise but sades refused to go so I just said no leave us alone. His sisters were mortified and unhappy Sades wasnt staying but too bad I was no way leaving my daughter there.

We finally arrived at Leish house and Sades was still in tears but was ok. She cried again once we left Leish house but I am sure she will be ok.

I have spend the rest of the day just being there for her. She made dinner with me and I also took her to pick a dvd for tonight. Every now and then she comes over with tears in her eyes but I cuddle her and tell her it will be alright and just reassuring her that her father does love her and he is really just embarassed and mad with himself.....

He will get his.....