Green eyed monster **rant**
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Category: Planning Pregnancy (trying for baby)
Forum Name: Planning Pregnancy (trying for baby)
Forum Description: Trying to get pregnant? Going through fertility treatment? Just planning your first or second child? There are many people out there in the same boat to help and listen and share with
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=21551
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Topic: Green eyed monster **rant**
Posted By: sharpie
Subject: Green eyed monster **rant**
Date Posted: 08 October 2008 at 7:42pm
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Hi anyone who needs to rant or doesn't mind listening.
Needed to rant to someone, and couldn't find a green eyed monster topic, so instead of thread jacking I thought I'd start my own. I have just heard today that my brother in law and his girlfriend are pregnant after telling us all they were starting to try LAST MONTH!! we have been TTC for 2 and a half years. I am 29 and she is 36. I am absolutly gutted. I just can't get over the unfairness of it all. I just wanted them to have to try a little bit harder. Why was it so easy for them? This is on top of my sister and my partners sister both telling us they were preg in the last three weeks. Both of them already have children, can't they share? ... well that doesn't make any sense but I'm feeling a bit irrational about it all atm. Anyone else in this situation? Please share, I feel like a good old b$#@ch session. |
Replies:
Posted By: chocol8
Date Posted: 08 October 2008 at 7:49pm
| I know what you mean Sharpie! Everyone around me seems to be getting pregnant at the drop of a hat at the moment...I'm of course very happy for them all but from a selfish perspective it's so frustrating!! |
Posted By: Zina
Date Posted: 08 October 2008 at 7:55pm
Hey Sharpie - Big hugs for you  I'm sorry to hear how you are feeling. Life is really unfair sometimes and you are completely allowed to be feeling the way you are.
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Posted By: AnnC
Date Posted: 08 October 2008 at 8:04pm
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I know how you feel Sharpe - not from personal experience but our friends are going thru it. They have been trying for agesnbut still no baby.
we are thinking of having another and will feel bad if we get pregnant before them - considering after saying Rhylz was out last. We don't mean to be pregnant before them to up set them though... Hugs I am sure you need it right now ------------- Ann 
Also Mum to Josh (15) and Brooke (10) |
Posted By: Vanillabean
Date Posted: 08 October 2008 at 8:57pm
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I completely understand where you're coming from, its been an 18 month journey for me so far and all my friends and many acquaintances seem to get pg at the drop of a hat. Sometimes I feel bad when someone gets pregnant straight away just because I know now that they won't understand how things are for me.
I really hope you get your BFP soon. ------------- 5x mc, Jan 08, June 08, Nov 08, May 09, April 11 http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 08 October 2008 at 9:19pm
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i cant say i truly understand how you feel , and id be lying if i said i wanted to...i really dont know how you guys do it, and i think your all incredible .
One thing ive constantly found since joining this forum, is how unfair life is, every time i hear of a child being abused or treated badly by its parents ,i think "the ladies on OB should have had that child " Its not fair, and i hope and pray for all of you that are trying that you get your BFPs really soon ------------- 
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Posted By: WestiesGirl
Date Posted: 08 October 2008 at 9:39pm
Yep I can totally relate to this and it sucks big time!!! We found out that my BIL and SIL are pg (they are about 14 weeks now) but were 9 weeks when we found out and yep, same as you, only took them their first month trying. The crappy thing for us was we found out a month after we had MC'ed our own wee angel. Big I hope you get your well deserved wee bubba soon Feel free to vent at any time too  ------------- Our Angel July 08  Gone but not forgotten
And to complete our family, our princess has arrived 
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sharpie wrote:Posted By: choco69
Date Posted: 08 October 2008 at 10:07pm
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sharpie i know how you feel ... life has a way of putting people in front of us we just want to slap! (in the nicest possible way of course)
** quick rant ** one of my friends found out she was pregnant a couple of nights ago after what amounted to a 2 week stand, said she didn't want the baby, i offered to adopt it, she said no she couldn't do that, so had a termination all planned and then miscarried ... and she wondered why i was upset with her! ** rant over please continue with the previous conversation sorry for the minor hijack! ** 
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Posted By: JadeC
Date Posted: 08 October 2008 at 10:21pm
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Oh no, that totally sucks. I don't have people in real life getting pg, just online, and it's incredibly hard. I can't imagine what it must be like to have family.
Hang in there. ------------- http://pregnancy.baby-gaga.com/" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: sharpie
Date Posted: 09 October 2008 at 8:34am
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Thanks everyone,
Its nice that you can get both sides of the story in here. AnnC, thanks for putting it in perspective for me. I know they don't mean to do it, how can they, noone in RL knows we are TTC. Its not their fault. I need to find a way to get myself past this or I'm going to poison all the family get togethers. Rianna08 I can't imagine the pain of a M/C. I think I should count my blessings. Perhaps its easier not to get preg than to lose a baby? I'm sorry for your loss. choco69, that must have made you so mad. I think I would have found it hard to see that friend for some time if she had terminated. Is she upset about the M/C at all? I am still struggling with this today, my partner does not understand the way I'm feeling and yesterday when he told me, it was my ov date. I was so upset and started a fight with him, which doesn't help with "the mood" and we didn't do the deed. So it looks like this won't be my month again, which obviously makes how I feel today just that much worse. Thanks for listening again, Please feel free to leave your own rants, its always nice to feel outrage and sympathy for someone else rather than focus on your own worries. |
Posted By: sharpie
Date Posted: 09 October 2008 at 8:40am
Sorry, I didn't mean it's nice, I mean its a welcome distraction. |
Posted By: tiptoes
Date Posted: 09 October 2008 at 9:43pm
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Choco that sucks, I had a similar thing earlier this year when my sister got pregnant and terminated as it was a really bad time for her (marriage breakup + medical problems etc) I'm not upset that she terminated but just at the irony of the situation. Just didn't seem fair that I desperately wanted to be pregnant and she didn't.
So many of our friends have either gotten pregnant or had a baby in the last year and I'm happy for them all but just jealous and sad for me and wish it was me. I also wish it wasn't so easy for them and they'd quit telling me to relax as it will happen soon! I get what you mean sharpie, as it's nice to not only have the distraction but to know you're not the only one. ------------- http://alterna-tickers.com">  
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Posted By: sharpie
Date Posted: 10 October 2008 at 11:24am
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Oh boy here I am again. I was just starting to feel better and I had a relapse! They've decided to tell everybody already, so my nextdoor neighbours just came over and said isn't it great about blah and blah (not their real names!) then she said, Must be your turn next!! Oh how I hate that statement. It was all I could do to mumble a maybe and shut the door in her face. I thought I would have three months to get used to this before I started getting that and the when are you... question. When will people realise how personal a question that is and NOT ask it!
But a funny story, I have decided that I obviously have issues with this girl in particular, that I am taking this preg news so badly and have decided to try and find a councellor. I rang the CAB and explained to the lady what I was looking for. She told me that if I babysat for a new baby for a week I would get preg. Thats all it took for her apparently. I haven't heard that one before and it gave me a giggle. |
Posted By: AnnC
Date Posted: 10 October 2008 at 2:13pm
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LOl must be the clucky hormones makes you more fertile??
Now just to find that newborn baby ....   LOL
I am sure your time will come --- sending heaps of preggie vibes your way ------------- Ann
Also Mum to Josh (15) and Brooke (10) |
Posted By: Nutella
Date Posted: 03 December 2008 at 1:23am
| Sigh, I know this feeling. My cousin, sister, and three good friends are all preggers and we have been trying for over a year now. Seems so unfair when they have all had other kids and we can't even have one. When my sister told me I cried and felt so guilty that I felt jealous! It just seems so unfair that some people just have to blink and BAM they are pregnant. Ah well, we are going to the doctor tomorrow to discuss our current situation so maybe there will be some great advice...like keep trying! |
Posted By: tiptoes
Date Posted: 03 December 2008 at 10:40am
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Good luck at the doctors nat, hopefully they're able to at least do some testing and come up with some answers!
------------- http://alterna-tickers.com">
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Posted By: ooEvaoo
Date Posted: 03 December 2008 at 1:58pm
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Rant away!!. I think that the majority of people who fall pregnant and say "we weren't evern trying!" yadah yadah...actually have been trying for awhile, but want to present themselves as able to fall pregnant easily. When we had my son, he was a total surprise...and yes we weren't trying.....BUT...it was the result of over 12 months of majority unprotected sex!!. My cycle is pretty regular so kinda knew when to avoid doing the deed, but yes sometimes it's not failproof. It's fine to feel angry, jealous, resentful etc....it just shows how passionate you are in wanting to bring a child(ren) into this world. I do hope that you get your BFP very soon! ------------- 
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Posted By: Bobbie
Date Posted: 03 December 2008 at 3:05pm
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I can only imagine how you feel. I found it hard when my friend got preg first month trying and it took me 6 months - and that's only 6 months not 2 and a half years.
Mind you on the other side she was totally freaked about getting preg so quickly as she figured she'd have a few months of trying first. -------------  
 
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Posted By: Flipsta
Date Posted: 03 December 2008 at 3:10pm
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In the same boat Sharpie!
A very good friend of mine fell pregnant recently after 5 months of trying and DH and I have been trying for 13 months now and oh boy what a wave of emotions when she told me. Pure excitement then pure jealousy. I felt really awful And I have bad thoughts sometimes when she tells me she is not excited about it cause she has morning sickness etc and I feel like snapping at her "at least your are pregnant so quit moaning!"....and then I say to myself did I just think that?? what is wrong with me. 
But there are plenty of us out there going through the same thing. That is the beauty of these forums. Allows us to vent these things and know there are others that understand. Keep the chin up and fingers crossed all of us get our BFP's soon
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Posted By: AzzaNZ
Date Posted: 03 December 2008 at 3:26pm
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Sorry Sharpie, I know exactly how you feel!
It took us two years to get preggie and everyone around me seemed to be managing accidentally. I remember a friend telling me she was preggie and I burst into tears (and I was happy for her but I was so tired of waiting for my turn). The day after we found out we were preggie my SIL announced so was she, accidentally, and proceeded to b*tch and whine about how terrible it was and how having a baby was ruining her life 
I hope you get a big fat positive soon! |
Posted By: gannet
Date Posted: 03 December 2008 at 4:54pm
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My best friend knows we have been trying for the last almost 8 months and she rang the other day and asked if she could borrow a HPT as she was a week late, although she was 99% sure that it was because of her new pill not that she was pregnant.
I almost cried when she told me, and as much as I love her dearly, and I would have been really excited for her I was soo relieved when it came back negative. I told DH that i would have been upset if she was pregnant and he couldn't really understand why, and just said "it will happen for us". From reading the forums I have decided that men have no idea of what we go through. Still in saying that he is still just as disappointed as I am when AF arrives. And, the other four girls who I work with all have children under 2&1/2 and often talk about baby stuff and I feel left out. A couple of them know we are trying and are really good, but sometimes I wish they would talk about something else (until I have my own and can join them lol) I don't think that there is anything wrong with any of us for feeling this way, it would just be so nice not to be in this predicament. Keep smiling everyone, our turn will come soon!! |
Posted By: Flipsta
Date Posted: 04 December 2008 at 9:52am
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Gannet you are so right
Guys don't really understand what we go through. But they do get disappointed like you say. They just deal with it in their own way. It is totally normal for us to feel like we do. Human nature. I was beating myself up for it though and feeling like a bad friend but then I thought well I guess it is how I actually deal with my feelings towards my pregnant friend is what matters the most. 
Bring on those BFP's! Our times will definitely come! |
Posted By: MindyW
Date Posted: 04 December 2008 at 11:28am
I absolutely hate it when people say to me "Just and relax and it will happen" next person who says that to me may very well get a kick in the shin to show just how relaxed I actually am after 12 months of TTC!!!!
edited for grammer/repeated words ------------- My Beautiful Little Emily http://lilypie.com"> 
We've Waited for You Forever! |
Posted By: sno0ze
Date Posted: 04 December 2008 at 4:29pm
| I have been trying for over a year and a half off and on for number 2 while two close friends have fallen pregnant and due to give birth in a couple of months. Its going to be hard to buy presents for the babies, I am excited for them and can't wait to see the babies but still its quite bittersweet....so cut a long story short I know how you feel and its really good for the soul to know I am not the only one. Its pretty tough!!!! |
Posted By: Mum_mum
Date Posted: 04 December 2008 at 4:40pm
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Sno0ze i know what you mean about bitter sweet - I m/ced a week before by nephew was born, was really hard to go back to hospital and see this beautiful baby. I love him a hell of a lot tho but was hard to see what i was no longer getting.
Ah feeling a bit woe is me lately, our baby would have been due in 4 weeks  But as you say guys don't understand at all so im too nervous to bring it up in case he thinks im dwelling on it IYKWIM.
Anyway Baby dust to all of you beautiful ladies!  ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
Angel baby - May 2008
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Posted By: Emily281
Date Posted: 04 December 2008 at 9:45pm
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Gannet - men definitely don't understand. My DH always used to tell me off for stressing about TTC.
I just found out last week (on CD3 when I was in alot of pain!) that a co-workers wife is pg ... with their 2nd child. They started trying for their first at the same we started to TTC and now they're on their 2nd and we still don't have any. They managed to get pg straight away both times. And my DH just doesn't understand when I say it's not fair! ------------- TTC#1: Jan 07 Aug 08: Lap found and excised Stage 3 Endo Nov 08: 2nd lap clear - given OK to TTC after next AF |
Posted By: ScaredyCat
Date Posted: 05 December 2008 at 5:23pm
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Oh wow, I'm sooooooooooo glad I found this thread!! Thank you, it totally amazed me there are others feeling exactly the same, when I thought it was just me being a jeolous idiot all the time!
We have being TTC for # 1 coming up fours year in Jan , and in that time I think I can count at least 10 friends that have fallen pg and some are even onto # 2!! Not that I would ever begrudge any of them, I am so happy for them all, just not so happy for me and my DP.
One of my closest friends fell pg in just one month and is due in two weeks and I am struggling so much not to cry in front of her and put on my happy face, she is so excited and she really deserves it as she has had some rotten luck in the past too, but it still doesn't make it any easier! And we start IVF later this month and am totally scared witless about that , but at least its a step in the right direction. I wish all you ladies the best of luck and hope to hear (read) about your BFP's soon. |
Posted By: Emmecat
Date Posted: 07 December 2008 at 3:07pm
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TTC is one of the most stressful things I have ever been through and that didn't stop once I actually fell pg. ((hugs)) to all who are still on their ttc journey. It's not easy, it's often not fair but the wee light at the end of the tunnel that kept me going was the thought that *eventually* most women get pg one way or another......it just sure doesn't feel like it when you're in the toilet holding another BFN.... -------------   http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: Emmecat
Date Posted: 07 December 2008 at 3:09pm
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PS- btw I am a foster Mum to a 5 year old who's parents took heroin and other charming drugs throughout her pregnancy(s)......ttc and holding a positive attitude whilst fostering a child that came from that was bloody hard. Still is! ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: sno0ze
Date Posted: 07 December 2008 at 3:19pm
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Wow, my hats off to you Emmecat, that is so great you are fostering, Look luck with your pregnancy
Its angers me to no end when people don't care at all about their unborn child and take drugs etc. |
Posted By: _Soda_
Date Posted: 07 December 2008 at 9:17pm
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HUGE hugs for all of you out there still waiting for that BFP. i dont know how that feels tbh as DH and I havent started trying yet- next august is our turn and it cant come soon enough.. my green eyed monster rant is that EVERYONE i know has children, is pregnant or is TTC. and i dont mean it seems like everyone is, EVERYONE IS! i am literally the only one who is married or in a long term relationship who isnt at least beginning TTC... and it SUCKS! then im expected to not talk about babies. im a preschool, teacher for children aged 0-2 so 40 hours of my week is BABIES. every single time i hang out with any of my friends they talk about BABIES (I dont mind at all i love talking about it but its stupid its not MY BABIES im talking about!) my neighbour is in labour as we speak, and im home by myself...you guessed it, on a BABY website lol. i love kids and am soooo happy for everyone i know who is having them, but i sooo badly want that to be me.. im sick of waiting and being told "next year is our turn" i want my turn now, dammit!! ok rant over. i feel really selfish saying all that when we havent even started and some of you have been trying for years. but i can relate from the point of view of watching everone else have babies and im not.. sorry if its selfish..but ive been wanting to get that off my chest for sooo long and havent been able to say it coz everyone has or is having babies and i dont want to offend them... ------------- My little miracle 6/1/2011 My angel in Heaven 9/5/14 http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: Flipsta
Date Posted: 08 December 2008 at 1:01pm
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Yes dont' you love it when people say "just relax". I think sometimes they just say that cause they are not sure what else to say! But better they say nothing to be honest as it is very damn annoying.
TTC is definitely a very hard journey when it doesn't come together as expected. There is always that horrible little feeling in my belly of what say it doesn't happen. Well there ain't much I can do if it doesn't but it is just all that unknown stuff that I find hard. But then I have moments where I flip the coin and go well I am doing all I can and that is all I can do so what is the point in stressing and worrying about it. It isn't going to change anything. Then the coin flips back!!! What a roller coaster!
I haven't experienced a MC so my heart goes out to all of you that have. Emmecat, I also take my hat off to you. It is a wonderful thing what you are doing for that 5 year old. Keep that chin up
Let's just keep our fingers and toes crossed that our times will come soon to be Mum's.
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Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 10 December 2008 at 12:59pm
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*lurker in *
Hugs ladies, I dont know what its like to wait for so long for a BFP, the longest I was in the 2ww thread was 2 cycles ( I think) and even then I don't think I could have handled anymore , so I dont know how you ladies that have been trying for so long do it , i really don't , I think your'e all amazing . Emmecat, thats so cool you foster that little boy, thank god he has you , i hate to think what his life would be like if he was still with his mother -------------
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Posted By: Shellis
Date Posted: 14 December 2008 at 11:13pm
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Hi all, I cannot feel your pain as I have just fallen pregnant for the second time and both times were very quick.
I can however explain what it is like to be on the other side. I have two friends who have done IVF and another that is currently having issues. It was so incredibly hard to tell my friend that I was pregnant and had done so very quickly when they had been trying for over 18 months. I ensured we told them in a location that was comfortable so if she got upset she could deal with that but it was still incredibly difficult, especially as she put on a very brave face but I found out later she was devasted like you guys and I felt so terrible that it just wasn't fair that people who would be crap parents and don't really want them can fall pregnant easily and others who would be great parents can't. Now luckily they have had a baby but via IVF. My other IVF friends had another friend pregnant at the same time and I witnessed her not coping with that. Now my third friend is trying to get pregnant and again has been for a while and doctors aren't being very helpful with her unfortunately so there is not end in sight yet. Now I am terrified to tell her I am pregnant as we have another 2 mutual friends that are pregnant so it would be three of us together and not them... And with this partnership the husband is probably not going to really cope either... In some ways I wish it took us longer than one cycle but it didn't and I can't change that but I can just try and break it easily to them and hope that they are successful in their quest for a baby! So all in all hugs to you all, some of us do think about you guys when we are telling those we know have been struggling, some people are rude and don't give a crap and other people honestly don't know you are trying so they can't really be held responsible for their luck. I just hope you all find joy when you all successfully fall pregnant. Good luck all - my guilty rant over |
Posted By: buzzydaisy
Date Posted: 15 December 2008 at 11:01am
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Wow I am so glad I found this thread.
I was just saing to my friend the other day that I thought I should start a thread for women who are TTC and month after month have nothin. I must say I cant stand reading or trying to be a part of the TTC thread or 2ww thread as there are +ve after +ve and I want to be happy for them but for my own selfish reasons I just cant. I wanted to start somewhere we could vent these unreasonable frustrations without looking totally horrible. Thanks Sharpie for having the guts to say what u ar feeling. I have been trying for 3 yrs 3months now and refuse to give up. I have 1 wonderful little boy who was a surprise 5 yrs ago. Now that we have planned it all it wont happen. I was the 1st out of my friends and family and now they are all up to no.2 or 3 and I am still TTC. Everytime I get someones good news I try to act sincere but I don't know ho well I pull it off. ------------- 
 
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Posted By: lisa85
Date Posted: 15 December 2008 at 7:50pm
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I gotta admit I watched one of my best mates try for 2 years and it was the hardest thing ever watching her reaction evertime her time of the month would roll around. She deserved to be a momma soooo bad and it was breaking my heart!
The worst though, was when I got pregnant with the girls I didn't tell her for 3 months because I felt awful! and when I did tell her I could she how much it hurt. Here I was 9 years younger and not even trying!!! But then the wonderful thing was as soon as I had told her she found out she was pregnant and now she has the beautiful baby girl she had been dreaming of! It's hard work and I have such a huge amount of admiration for the heartache some of you ladies out there have to put yourselves through just to get the wonderful prize at the end. Much love to all and lots of positive sticky thoughts xxx -------------  
TTC #3 since Jan 2010 - PCOS MC April 2010 |
Posted By: WestiesGirl
Date Posted: 15 December 2008 at 10:14pm
Trying4No2 I so know what you mean about not waiting to post in the TTC threads. I sometimes feel a bit meh about posting on my crappy days or when someone gets a BFP that has only been trying for 1 month. Having said that, if I didnt post here I'd drive DH crazy I'd drive myself crazy lol 
I hope you get a BFP real soon hun ------------- Our Angel July 08 Gone but not forgotten
And to complete our family, our princess has arrived
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Posted By: Crakleys
Date Posted: 15 December 2008 at 11:24pm
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"when someone gets a BFP that has only been trying for 1 month"
Hearing you loud on clear on that one hon!! |
Posted By: Emily281
Date Posted: 16 December 2008 at 6:33am
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Not to mention all the people complaining about how it's taking so long and how they're never gonna get pg .... and they've only been TTC for 3 or 4 months. Mind you I'm sure I did the same thing way back when ------------- TTC#1: Jan 07 Aug 08: Lap found and excised Stage 3 Endo Nov 08: 2nd lap clear - given OK to TTC after next AF |
Posted By: Flipsta
Date Posted: 16 December 2008 at 10:59am
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It is a bizarre predicament to be in isn't it.
I tried all my twenties to make sure I didn't get pregnant and now I am nearly 35, trying to conceive for our first baby and into 14 months now and on cycles of clomid. Talk about life taking a slight twist in the journey! I know what you mean Shellis, my best friend is pregnant and she tells me alot she knows how lucky they are. I feel jealous about it all but I would never tell her that. It is just human nature I think and we don't need to beat ourselves up because our times will come. Getting pregnant each month is actually not that easy, only 20% chance I think for a perfectly fertile couple so it is all about timing and for some it happens sooner than others but it will happen for us all....still hard and frustruating though I know. Bring on those BFP's!!!
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Posted By: sharpie
Date Posted: 22 December 2008 at 8:13pm
| Wow, when I started this thread I had no idea there would be so many people who feel the same as me. Most of the time I feel so alone. I've just read through all of these posts and now I don't feel like the mean horrible person I thought I was. I'm glad that there is both sides of the story represented in here. Keep it coming everyone. On a blue day (like today) this is a very reassuring thread. |
Posted By: WestiesGirl
Date Posted: 22 December 2008 at 8:46pm
Haha so true, isnt it ironic! If I knew how easy it was to NOT get pg then I'd never have gone on the Pill to prevent a pregnancy when I was younger! ------------- Our Angel July 08 Gone but not forgotten
And to complete our family, our princess has arrived
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Posted By: choco69
Date Posted: 23 December 2008 at 7:25am
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rianna i think we all feel the same way - if we knew then what we know now!!!
afm - today's rant - my nana - she has arrived for xmas - and her first question - so i suppose you don't want children then is that why you don't have one - could have throttled her!!!! can't wait for my sister and her kids to arrive later today - lots of little boy hugs which makes it all better |
Posted By: Crakleys
Date Posted: 23 December 2008 at 2:55pm
| I cried today in the supermarket because I was looking through the gossip mags and two celebrities were pregnant! How sad is that. |
Posted By: tiptoes
Date Posted: 24 December 2008 at 9:32am
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Oh no you poor thing, but I'm exactly the same. I was reading a mag yesterday and every second article was about some happy couple being pregnant agghhhh!!!!!! 2009 will be our year I'm sure ------------- http://alterna-tickers.com">
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Posted By: babyg
Date Posted: 03 January 2009 at 10:40pm
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I feel like one of the big bad ladies who creates green-eyed monsters
I got pregnant while 'deciding' when to TTC during 2007 and now my best friend is struggling to concieve. They had been TTC for 9mths only to MC recently and now it looks like it could be another year yet before anything much happens (she is having ongoing complications from her MC) Although my bestie absolutely loves my little girl like her own and wouldn't wish her away for the world, it doesn't ease the guilt I feel Worst thing now is, DH and I will be ready to TTC #2 this year and it will break my heart if we have another before they get the one that they so want
I'm sorry ladies and hope your BFPs are just around the corner. ------------- Ev, Mum to: Carys Ruby - 4 October 2007 Spencer James - 2 July 2010 |