Hi Everyone,

Can you give me some advice on a bit of a predicament that I’m in at work?

Basically, my company wants me to take on some extra responsibilities – above and beyond my current role. We’ve been negotiating it for the last few months and it’s a pretty cool opportunity.

I’d be taking on more stuff from now, with an ongoing monthly commitment for next year. They want me to be almost like the ‘public face’ of the company – eek.

Now the problem, obviously, is that I haven’t told them that I’m knocked up. And don’t really want to say anything until 12 weeks.

There isn’t anyone else here who would be able (or want to) take on this work / manage it etc – so I don’t really feel like I can say ‘actually, no, I don’t want to do it.’ But at the same time I feel like I’m ‘leading them on’ by starting it, and then effectively leaving them in the lurch mid-next year... (I’m due at the end of May)

What would you do?? Help!

I guess it depends a lot on your relationship with your boss. TBH I would prob sit down and have a conversation with them in a frank and honest way - basically saying exactly what your post says....that you are really keen for the opportunity but dont want to let them down / lead them on etc. I know that ideally you would wait until you were 12wks but I think that they would appreciate your honesty, and obviously you can ask them to keep in confidential.

Simsam you said exactly what I was going to.

I actually think that letting them know about your pregnancy is the only thing you can morally do.  Imagine how the boss would feel if you accepted the responsibility ad then told them in a months time that you're pregnant (I suspect trust would go out the window). 

If you're open and honest about it there's a chance you'll be able to do this role for the next 4-6 months and train someone up to fill in for you when you go on maternity leave.  In fact they can't discriminate against you for being pregnant so it's the likely outcome. 

Yep I agree with the above, you are almost 9 weeks so you would be having that conversation in a few weeks time anyway, and CONGRATS on being offered the new postion, it sounds great!

Thanks for all your advice!

I do pretty much agree with you all – that was my gut instinct too. It’s been really hard not telling my boss so far, as we work really closely together and she’s so cool.

However:  - She is not involved in this new project. It is working with people from other divisions who I am only just getting to know – so it kind of changes things a bit...

Milo – I’m hoping to take a year off, but again, pending on what happens with work – as I may be able to do some stuff part time / from home earlier.

I just had a big vent to DH and he reckons I should hold out til 12 weeks – which is just over 3 weeks away. I’m finding it quite stressful though  - I hate feeling like I’m being ‘dishonest’ about it all – gah!

Hmm - I might think about telling her next week...

The other thing which is stopping me is that I have a performance / pay review coming up - so I'd kinda like to have that out of the way, in case my 'announcement' changes anything. Though I know that it 'shouldn't and I'm probably just being paranoid

I got offered a job on a new team while I was pregnant.  It wasn't really a promotion, just a sideways step, but before the job came up I was being made redundant.  As it turned out others were passed over and I was offered the role.

I was about 25 weeks so everyone knew I was pregnant and I got stressed out that I might be discriminated against, especially when the boss asked me how long I planned to take off for maternity leave as one of my interview questions.  Turns out she only asked that question so she could plan cover for me while I was away because she wanted to offer me the job.

I also got a fantastic bonus and payrise while I was on maternity leave too.