Sorry Need To Vent
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Category: General Chat
Forum Name: General Chat
Forum Description: For mums, dads, parents-to-be, grandparents, friends -- you name it! And you name the topic you want to chat about!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=22485
Printed Date: 02 October 2025 at 7:58am
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Topic: Sorry Need To Vent
Posted By: NeoshasMummy
Subject: Sorry Need To Vent
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 2:27pm
Well I had arranged a birthday dinner for myself out a local bar/restaurant and invited all my close friends to come out and celebrate with me as I hardly ever go out. That was all good, most people could come and booked that weekend and today the day we are ment to be going out I have had txt after txt saying sorry busy or can't make it see you next week, have fun without me and now im left with myself, DP and a good friend.....that is out of like10 people all of which I see on a weekly basis. I rang two others that hadn't cancelled and neither have answered the phone. I am left pretty depressed actually, the same thing happened with Neosha's birthday we had almost everyone RSVP by the date then 9 people cancel that day and 5 just not turn up, im probably having just a sensitive day but I have never missed an event that I was invited to, I make it to all their birthdays and dinner parties. I have only been here in Gisborne a couple of years but know my friends in Auckland would never do this to me especially on my birthday.  Again im probably being over sensitive but it has been happening alot lately.
Do you think I am being unreasonable by getting upset? I chose an affordable place to go and on a day when people aren't working, gave 2 weeks notice and got people to rsvp. ------------- https://secure.fertilityfriend.com/home/30c4ec/" rel="nofollow">  Mrs Te Kani ❤️ Neosha 26/5/2007 |
Replies:
Posted By: pikelets
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 2:37pm
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Happy Birthday! (although it doesn't sound like you are too happy right now).
That is horrible Jess. I think it is awful if they RSVP'd and have all cancelled. I can understand a few would maybe have things come up unexpectedly but all of them!? You are not being over sensitive. I would be very upset too. I hope you still have a nice time with DP and your friend tonight.  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
 3 Angels - Dec10 / Mar11 / Dec11
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Posted By: NeoshasMummy
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 2:38pm
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Yeah there were no reasons... just oh well got other plans. I could understand if there were issues with kids and stuff but it's not. Oh well guess you know who your real friends are. ------------- https://secure.fertilityfriend.com/home/30c4ec/" rel="nofollow"> Mrs Te Kani ❤️ Neosha 26/5/2007 |
Posted By: Paws
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 2:40pm
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I would be upset too hun!! It's reasonable that some might have genuine reasons, illness, probs with kids that sort of thing...but to just have other plans....that really sucks!
Happy Birthday hun!!!! I hope you have a great day anyway! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Andie
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 2:50pm
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I was upset after a birthday like that too, and was telling DH that I must have real issues about it 'cause it just hurt my feelings so much - he said 'well anyone would be upset if that happened - happens to us all and I don't know anyone who doesn't feel stink about it'... and he's not at all sensitive, and doesn't indulge people in having 'issues' one bit! So if even he thinks that, I'd say you're not being a petal about it - it plain sux when that happens and I'm sure most of us have had it happen, too (so either we're all nigel no-mates or there's no need to take it personally, your friends as a collective just stink this weekend!). ------------- Andie |
Posted By: NeoshasMummy
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 2:56pm
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Thanks just needed someone else to tell me that im not a total dork by sitting here getting upset over it. The one good friend that is always there and never misses a beat came for breakfast this morning and made me a beautiful cake... im really grateful for that at least I know someone cares. ------------- https://secure.fertilityfriend.com/home/30c4ec/" rel="nofollow"> Mrs Te Kani ❤️ Neosha 26/5/2007 |
Posted By: Kellz
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 2:57pm
| Dont worry I'll still be there! We can have fun without everyone else!! And u so better not cancel cos Im SOOO going out!!! |
Posted By: NeoshasMummy
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 3:00pm
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LOL thanks, I felt like not going out but I shouldn't let it get the best of me. ------------- https://secure.fertilityfriend.com/home/30c4ec/" rel="nofollow"> Mrs Te Kani ❤️ Neosha 26/5/2007 |
Posted By: caraMel
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 3:07pm
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Aww chick! I had a birthday like that last year, I was really gutted too and I really wanted to cancel the whole thing because I felt so stink about myself.
DH wouldn't let me though and even though it was only 5 of us in the end, we had such a fun night and I was really appreciative of the people who did make the effort to be there in the end. HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Don't let slack friends spoil your night, you don't need lots of people there to have a good time. ------------- Mel, Mummy to E: 6, B: 4 and: 
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Posted By: kiwisj
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 3:11pm
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Happy Birthday!
As some of the others have said, it's happened to all of us so it's not just you  I think it's harder when you've moved away from home though.. I know I'm always thinking of how much better it would be if my close friends (who never let you down) could be there.
We'll just have to throw you a virtual party in here
And make sure you dress up extra nice and ENJOY YOURSELF tonight, I bet it will still be fun x ------------- SJ Callum - Dec 2008 Daniel - Oct 2010 |
Posted By: Kellz
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 3:19pm
Well we could always do something diff instead! Or u can tell the outlaws that they are invited after all 
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Posted By: NeoshasMummy
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 3:37pm
Bruce said he can sit in between us LOL a women on each arm I haven't heard from C yet so she might come and if I changed the plans now could you imagine it! Im ok now I was just on a high then it started going wrong but I know im going to have fun. Oh oh oh and I got some more westlife and britney spears songs on singstar. Im such a dork LOL
Sorry for my lil wimp out guys  but you all made me feel so much better ------------- https://secure.fertilityfriend.com/home/30c4ec/" rel="nofollow"> Mrs Te Kani ❤️ Neosha 26/5/2007 |
Posted By: Kellz
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 3:40pm
| Oh yay bring on singstar! He he! God poor bruce having to put up with us 2!! |
Posted By: Southlandmummy
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 3:44pm
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Happy Birthday chick :)
But i think its really rude if people have rsvped saying they were coming then cancel as they had other plans... I loath people who cancel already made plans to make others... Have a good night out anyway :) ------------- Cindy - Princess and Princes Samia Isobel Joy born 9th September 2008 Spencer Graeme John born 29th May 2006 Kaylin Gavin Robert born 19 December 2004 |
Posted By: NeoshasMummy
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 3:45pm
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Thanks ------------- https://secure.fertilityfriend.com/home/30c4ec/" rel="nofollow"> Mrs Te Kani ❤️ Neosha 26/5/2007 |
Posted By: Danaj
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 5:10pm
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My Dad always told me that you can count your true friends on one hand and most people don't even get that many.
Chick, people are fickle and they just don't get it. Clearly they are not as important in your life as you thought. If they don't have enough respect to show up then they don't deserve your time and worry. I tend to walk away from people like that cause they cause more hurt than good. 'd far prefer one friend than ten acquaintances. Tell them to stick it. ------------- http://www.TickerFactory.com/weight-loss/wyI1oWn/"> 
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Posted By: ooEvaoo
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 5:34pm
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dont worry about your friends........you have the most important people with you and that's all that matters. Hope you've had a great day....aside from the pullouts! MIL has made a birthdy cake for the BBQ dinner we're having over there place, so I'm glad I didn't go down to the supermarket last night and buy one to eat by myself lmfao. ------------- 
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Posted By: fire_engine
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 5:53pm
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Happy birthday!
You're completely allowed to feel down and pissed off with so many people cancelling. I ditto what everyone else says. Even though it's now only a small, select few, have a fab time and enjoy having a night out! ------------- Mum to two wee boys |
Posted By: Chickaboo
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 7:45pm
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Happy Birthday
I would be P#SSED I don't mind people saying they can't make it but to say they will and then pull out the last minute really makes me mad. I have one friend in particular who does this on a regular basis and its got to the point I don't actually ask her to go to places as one she will say she will come and then doesn't or she just doesn;t reply to my invite so i am left wondering if she is or isnt coming. It sure suxs------------- http://lilypie.com">  
876 |
Posted By: KiwiL
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 7:57pm
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I would be upset too!! Maybe it's just really, really bad luck?!? And if not, then you need some new, better friends!
Happy Birthday!! I hope you have a fabulous night out, even though it is just a few of you. And I hope it ends in tragic Britney renditions at home.
Hugs! |
Posted By: Kels
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 8:39pm
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Happy Birthday hun and I agree with everyone else, you have the right to be feeling like that. It is unfair when that happens. I have been there and wasnt nice at all. SOunds like you and Kellz are going to have fun. WOOHOO for singstar! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs |
Posted By: linda
Date Posted: 15 November 2008 at 9:09pm
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Guess you could say its not quantity, its quality sweetie!!!
But still, I would also been hurt if that had happened to me ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
Alex 6 and Harry 8 |
Posted By: NeoshasMummy
Date Posted: 16 November 2008 at 12:03am
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Linda! Where did I miss that you were having twins!!!
We had a great evening, DP has just left to drop Kellz off and it is now 12.01Am lol. I had two friends and DP and it was a great night. Thanks all for your support and kind words ------------- https://secure.fertilityfriend.com/home/30c4ec/" rel="nofollow"> Mrs Te Kani ❤️ Neosha 26/5/2007 |
Posted By: linda
Date Posted: 16 November 2008 at 8:30am
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Pleased to hear the night went well. Found out it was twins at 8 weeks. Took a while to get my head around it and have now got my head around the fact that I will have all boys. I had originally wanted #3 to try for a girl and have ended up with twin boys but always knew my chances of having boys was high. Looking forward to the challenge! ------------- http://lilypie.com">
Alex 6 and Harry 8 |
Posted By: NeoshasMummy
Date Posted: 16 November 2008 at 8:54am
It's amazing! Congratulations! ------------- https://secure.fertilityfriend.com/home/30c4ec/" rel="nofollow"> Mrs Te Kani ❤️ Neosha 26/5/2007 |
Posted By: Shezamumof3
Date Posted: 16 November 2008 at 11:19am
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Aww I would be upset aswell. That is so rude of your friends!!! Thats what kind of happened at my 21st, so i know how you feel!
Happy Birthday!!! ------------- |
Posted By: NeoshasMummy
Date Posted: 16 November 2008 at 11:30am
Awww I don't think I even want to have a 21st now
I had a good birthday though, thanks ------------- https://secure.fertilityfriend.com/home/30c4ec/" rel="nofollow"> Mrs Te Kani ❤️ Neosha 26/5/2007 |
Posted By: MrsH
Date Posted: 16 November 2008 at 12:58pm
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Oh, so sorry to hear!!
What is it these days with people not attending after saying yes to things? I think it's so fricken rude and it really pisses me off. If I was invited, I would have moved heaven and earth to be there if I had said yes. I think we need to start teaching better etiquette. I'm sure this wouldn't have happened in the 50s! Or maybe we've turned into spoilt brats who feel we don't have to honour our obligations.... Sorry... Venting too. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: fallen
Date Posted: 16 November 2008 at 2:23pm
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Happy Birthday!
I can so relate to what happened to you. 15 or so people who RSVP that they were coming to our engagement party no showed. So we had about 14 people there. Only one contacted me and apologised for not being there - she was having major kid problems. |