Telling kids about the new baby
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Forum Name: First baby? Second or more?
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Topic: Telling kids about the new baby
Posted By: jjands
Subject: Telling kids about the new baby
Date Posted: 22 December 2008 at 1:04pm
| Hi, we're expecting a new baby in June and have 2 older kids 4 & 6. When is a good time to tell them about the new baby? I want to do it soon (I think) so they can be apart of everything I think they'll be excited. DH wants to wait till I'm huge and they pretty much discover it for themselves. The other things is how much do you tell them about how it got in your tummy an how it comes out? I know they'll ask! Any advice would be good |
Replies:
Posted By: MrsMojo
Date Posted: 22 December 2008 at 1:30pm
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I would tell them now. You're past the first trimester and have had a scan so you know that the baby's healthy plus Miss 4 might be less likely to get physical with you when she's upset if you remind her that you have a baby in your belly and she needs to be gentle. I've found it useful to pinpoint the due date between other dates they look forward to but know are awhile away. Eg. When I was preg with Michaela I told Elizabeth (who was 5) and Josh (who was 3) that the new baby would come around Easter time. This time the kids know that the baby is due after Michaela's birthday and before Elizabeth's birthday. The getting in part I didn't need to talk to them about, thank goodness. But since their still very young I'd tend to go with a childs version of the truth something along the lines that daddy and mummy love each other so much, and they love you so much, that they thought it would be great to share their love blah blah blah so daddy gave mummy a seed which is nestled in her womb and growing into a baby. I'm sure there are childrens books about it too that might be helpful. Try There's a House Inside My Mummy and Angel in the Waters. -------------  
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Posted By: Kazzle
Date Posted: 22 December 2008 at 3:35pm
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rhiannon actually knew before i did, as she came up to me and kissed my tummy and went hello baby...next day i got a bfp....and now when asked where is mummys baby she says "in my tummy"...so very cute ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: jjands
Date Posted: 22 December 2008 at 4:03pm
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Yeh I think your right and I'm sure I can dodge any difficult questions with some other bit of exciting news. DH (SH today) just said tel them it's adult thing but I thought something a little more interesting would be good-the seed story is definately the go.
Wow thats so cool that she knew Kazzle! Maybe I'll tell them tonight coz I hate not being able to share it with them |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 22 December 2008 at 10:03pm
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I found out I was preg with the gremlins on Maya's 3rd birthday and I told her pretty much straight away. She came to the scan at 9 weeks when I found out they were twins and went to preschool and told everyone Mummy was having two babies before I'd even had time to get my head round it myself!
She loved helping to pick clothes for them and decorate their room etc. Even moreso when I was pregnant with Chiara (there's 5 years, 5 mths between them). I didn't bother much with telling the gremlins about being pregnant with Chiara. They were only 20 mths when I had her and they had no idea. They were pretty non-verbal at the time so it was really hard to explain to them. They've still coped really well tho. When we first brought her home they kept going into her room to check that she was still there lol, I don't think they thought she was ours to keep. -------------  Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: .Mel
Date Posted: 22 December 2008 at 10:11pm
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We had a family meeting around the bbq table while eating ice cream; I told the older two when I was 12 weeks. ------------- Mr Mellow (16) Miss Attitude (8) Destructa Kid (3) 
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Posted By: Nefertiti
Date Posted: 23 December 2008 at 1:34am
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I have a 16, 14 and 8 yr old and we told them after we'd seen a heartbeat on a scan.....I couldn't wait til 12 weeks. I guess because we were so excited after the previous being a blighted ovum. DP wanted to wait longer to tell them though. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: McPloppy
Date Posted: 23 December 2008 at 3:36pm
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We told lachie as soon as we found out cause we were oh so excited. We waited till he asked how Soghia got in mums tummy and told him that Daddy put her in ther to grow safely. Lachie then asked how she was going to get out? (little bugger!!) So i just said i will push her out then distracted him...he then got upset cause he did not want me to be ripped open (how did he know I would need a c section?) I then went on to explaine Everything will be ok cause we would be with the Dr's and they wouldn't let anything happen to me (He loves Dr's and trusts them completely). He then corrected me and told me that daddy put sophia on the bed and the shark put her in my tummy. WTF? He was happy with that so we left him to it lol. He came to all the appointments and blood tests (so he could se I was not being hurt) and he is the most devoted big brother ever...Everyone who holds Sophia is reminded that she is his sister and they cannot take her away. My beautiful boy!!!! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 23 December 2008 at 7:58pm
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All my girls have known that we are going to have a new baby from just before when we told our own parents - still in the first trimester. They come to all the midwife visits and she's awesome at involving them with helping with the blood pressure and listening to then wiping my tummy etc. At the end they all get to choose a sticker to put in my midwifery notes book. (I can't say enough good things about this mw). Miss almost 5 is quite curious about how things all work. We tell the girls ambiguous things like "God put the baby in my tummy" and "you have to be married to have a baby" (de facto couples are then "pretend married" lol). But as far as how the baby comes out, Miss almost 5 asked so much that I ended up showing her the line drawings from one of the brochures I got from the mw. She just doesn't know that it hurts a lot lol. ------------- |
Posted By: Kellygirl
Date Posted: 24 December 2008 at 12:46pm
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My daughter (4 yrs old at the time) was actually the first to know. DH went out and bought the test, I went and did it, told Marissa the results and then she told Daddy. It was DH birthday so that was his birthday present.
She was really good at keeping the secret too, we didn't want to tell anyone else until the 3 month mark and she didn't tell anyone. Then once the 3 month mark came she got to call all of the grandparents and tell them that she was going to be a big sister. We kept Marissa really involved the whole way through, she came to 90% of my MW appts, always helping them with taking my blood pressure and listening to the baby's heartbeat. She also came to my scans so she found out we were having a boy the same time I did. Marissa was also present at the birth, I prepared her really well. Telling her mummy might make some weird noises and that I might be in some pain but that it was ok. I also told her that the baby would look a bit dirty at first and showed her pictures of her birth, etc ,etc. She was great, she gave Graeson a kiss as soon as he was born and told the MW's his name. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: jjands
Date Posted: 24 December 2008 at 2:19pm
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Thanks for all your advice DH and I told the kids this morning as a early xmas present as Sophie had asked if we could ask santa for a bay a few weeks ago and yesterday she drew a pic of me holding a baby???? They're so ecited and came with me to the midwife this morning :) I'm a millon times more excited now I can share it with them!
Merry Christmas 
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Posted By: kasbee
Date Posted: 24 December 2008 at 2:55pm
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We havent told the kids yet gona wait till i'm 12 weeks, dont want to have to explain to them that mummy lost the baby if i do.
I can't even remember when we told Blair about Ryan & Katelyn think it was after my scan when we found out there was 2 of them. ------------- Kelly, mother to 4 wonderful children. http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Keoedy
Date Posted: 14 January 2009 at 9:37am
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I have been having the same concerns so good to see a forum about it. My boys are also 4 and 6 and we had decided to wait till I was past the first trimester. But I am growing very impatient with it and dying to tell them as I know they will be very excited. Also I feel that in not telling them it adds to my anxiety about miscarriage so we have decided to tell them tonight as it is our 6yr olds bday today (just turned 6) and don't want to take away from that. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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