What would you do??
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Category: General Chat
Forum Name: General Chat
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URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=23685
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Topic: What would you do??
Posted By: BabyKiwi
Subject: What would you do??
Date Posted: 12 January 2009 at 10:16pm
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To cut a long story short I no longer talk to my parents, huge argument, decided that I had enough of their crap.
Anyways, my youngest sister (14) and I have been chatting on MSN and it is to say the least, awkward. I don't want any information going back to my parents about things we are doing here in NZ. I know that I can't ask her to keep secrets from them (they know we are chatting to each other) It wouldn't be fair to her. She is already caught in the middle of all this. I have a Bebo and Facebook profile that she can see photos in, that were taken when A was born. I would like to post more pics so that my friends could see them, to save on the mass emailsand it's easier to be honest but I don't want my sister to show them to my parents (I know she does show them as she has said) I feel that they don't have the right to see her grow up when they couldn't care less about us! I know that I could ask her to not show them but I feel that it isn't very fair especially since I do send emails to other family members though with pics and they could then show the pics to my parents. Now, what would you do? Continue to post pics and just let them see what they are missing or not post any on the sites and just email my friends instead? Thanks in advance! |
Replies:
Posted By: kiwisj
Date Posted: 12 January 2009 at 10:32pm
 Family stuff sucks sometimes eh!
One option, on facebook at least, is to set up privacy rules for different groups. Ie, you put all of your friends into different groups and then you can change the privacy rules in your account settings to say that particular groups can or can't look at things like photos or your wall. So you could stop your sister from viewing the albums that way, and then she can't show your parents. It's hard though, as I imagine you'd probably like your sister to see the pics but fair enough that you don't want her stuck in the middle of your issues with your parents. again------------- SJ Callum - Dec 2008 Daniel - Oct 2010 |
Posted By: Bobbie
Date Posted: 12 January 2009 at 11:47pm
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I think it would upset them more to 'see what they're missing' than for them not to see pictures at all. -------------  
 
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Posted By: Danaj
Date Posted: 13 January 2009 at 8:11am
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Blimey, must have been a doozey of an argument. ------------- http://www.TickerFactory.com/weight-loss/wyI1oWn/"> 
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Posted By: peanut butter
Date Posted: 13 January 2009 at 8:26am
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Thats what I was thinking...mind you....there are times when I entertain the thought. |
Danaj wrote:Posted By: blondie
Date Posted: 13 January 2009 at 9:06am
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Posted By: IVFGirl1111
Date Posted: 13 January 2009 at 9:10am
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Eek hugs - I feel sorry for you!
At the end of the day it comes down to what you feel happy doing. Have you tried talking to your parents? Or you just dont want to at all? Its not fair to ask your little sister to not show them, especially her being 14. If you really dont want your parents seeing the photos, then set up a flicker account or a photo sharing account like that and just email your friends the link with all your photos - rather than having to email them all. Not a nice situation to be in at all so I really hope you manage to come up with something your happy with. Hugs hugs and more hugs! ------------- TTC 6 years IVF it is IVF/ICSI round one 10 eggs, 8 mature, 3 fertilised BFN IVF/ICSI #2 = 22 eggs! 20 mature, 15 fertilised, 1 fresh transfer and 2 frosties BFN 2 Frosties still in freezer thank god |
Posted By: AandCsmum
Date Posted: 13 January 2009 at 9:57am
I'd rather rub it in their noses of how much fun you have & how great your kids are 
Is your DH/DP's family in NZ...maybe post a lot of pics with them & your kid...
------------- Kel http://lilypie.com"> 
A = 01.02.04 & C = 16.01.09 & G = 30.03.12 |
Posted By: BabyKiwi
Date Posted: 13 January 2009 at 11:34am
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Thanks guys!
It was the usual argument of throwing my past up at every oppurtunity, telling me what I am doing wrong, etc etc. It was the fact that they just didn't bother their backsides with their GD. Esp when my 1st daughter died and I honestly thought that it would have brought us all closer together, ah well! Aliasmum, I'm leaning towards that myself. That way they can't say that I'm keeping their GD away from them. With DF's family, they live back in Scotland but when I do talk to my sister I do tell her that so and so has been in touch etc. BooBoo, since I've been in NZ, nearly 3.5 years they have called us about 4 times! I was always the one calling them and emailing etc, I just got sick of being the one making all the effort! It was always one-sided. |
Posted By: AzzaNZ
Date Posted: 13 January 2009 at 1:03pm
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Where are you from originally?
Changing your privacy settings on Facebook like someone suggested might help. My first thought is rather let them see what they're missing... 
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Posted By: BabyKiwi
Date Posted: 13 January 2009 at 1:16pm
| AzzaNZ I'm orginally from Scotland, moved here in Oct 2005 |
Posted By: Snappy
Date Posted: 13 January 2009 at 1:28pm
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Ah, we are the same with DHs family. He has not spoken to his mother in about 2-3 years.
We still talk to his step-sister, and she is our friend on bebo and facebook. DH refused to let me post pics up initially, because he knew she would be showing DHs mother the photos. But I told DH, as others have said here, that at least she knows what shes missing out on. Still havent had a congratulations or even an attempt to contact us since the last arguement he had with her. On the other hand, I sometimes think if she had never seen Jackson on Facebook etc, curiousity may have got the better of her at some point and she may have made an attempt to contact us. Now that shes seen him and can see all the photos she most probably never will. So I know how you feel, its a hard one. ------------- Mummy to two beauties... Formerly Kaiz. |
Posted By: emz
Date Posted: 13 January 2009 at 1:58pm
| Another option too is to set up a Facebook profile for your kids - I know lilfatty and SuperDaddy did that for wee Issy, so family across the world could see her progress. That way you can pick all your friends from your profile and then go nuts posting photos and not having to worry about constantly checking privacy settings. |
Posted By: miss
Date Posted: 13 January 2009 at 5:55pm
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Babykiwi, I live as though my mother doesn't exist. I know my younger sister tells her stuff and I know my Uncle passes on photos. But that actually doesn't affect me as i have no contact with her. Do what you want and ignore them. -------------  
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Posted By: BabyKiwi
Date Posted: 13 January 2009 at 7:57pm
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You are all right! It is def their loss not mine, I'm just glad I don't have any negativity from them anymore!
Emz, that is a great idea! Off to go and set one up..... |