This made me PML this morning!!
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Category: General Chat
Forum Name: General Chat
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URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=2384
Printed Date: 27 October 2025 at 12:27pm
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Topic: This made me PML this morning!!
Posted By: Guests
Subject: This made me PML this morning!!
Date Posted: 06 May 2006 at 9:04am
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Qantas Airlines----
It takes a college degree to fly a plane but only a high school diploma to fix one: a reassurance for those of us who fly routinely for their jobs. After every flight, Qantas pilots fill out a form, called a "gripe sheet", which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems; document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by Qantas' Pilots (Marked with a P) and the Solutions Recorded (marked with an S) By Maintenance Engineers. By the way, Qantas is the only major airline that has never had an accident. . ------------------------------------------------------------ P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement. S: Almost replaced left inside main tire. P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough. S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft. P: Something loose in cockpit. S: Something tightened in cockpit. P: Dead bugs on windshield. S: Live bugs on back-order. P: Auto pilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent. S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground. P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear. S: Evidence removed. P: DME volume unbelievably loud. S: DME volume set to more believable level. P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick. S: That's what they're for. P: IFF inoperative. S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode. P: Suspected crack in windshield. S: Suspect you're right. P: Number 3 engine missing. S: Engine found on right wing after brief search. P: Aircraft handles funny. (I love this one!) S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious. P: Target radar hums. S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics. P: Mouse in cockpit. S: Cat installed. And The Best One For Last!! P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer. S: Took hammer away from midget |
Replies:
Posted By: jack_&_charli
Date Posted: 06 May 2006 at 10:07am
hehehehehehe!!! love it! ------------- http://www.alternatickers.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: aimeejoy
Date Posted: 06 May 2006 at 10:09am
 ------------- Aimee Hannah 22/10/05 Greer 11/02/08 |
Posted By: jax
Date Posted: 06 May 2006 at 10:31am
HAHAHAHA Oh GOD I almost PMSL too !! Hahahaha hubby thinks I'm insane (laughing like a lunatic here), and is now ordering me to get off the computer LOL  ------------- Jacquie - Mama to Erin, 13.07.06 - Chief Cat Chaser & Marmite Sammie Eater 
Love many, trust few, harm none. ~Anon~ |
Posted By: MILF
Date Posted: 06 May 2006 at 10:47am
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haha my hubby was just going "what? whats wrong" when i was reading that, as i was giggling to much.... very funny... ------------- Lyla - mum to Xanthe -  my big 4 year old 
and Jordis - 1 year old 
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Posted By: Paws
Date Posted: 06 May 2006 at 2:07pm
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I've seen that one before but it had a different airline substituted for Qantas....so funny!!!! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Sarah Beth
Date Posted: 06 May 2006 at 3:26pm
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me too paws, but still made me laugh! ------------- "> 
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Posted By: james
Date Posted: 06 May 2006 at 5:32pm
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pml that is so funny ------------- <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b4.lilypie.com/nLJ5p13.png" alt="Lilypie 4th Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a> |
Posted By: daikini
Date Posted: 07 May 2006 at 8:25am
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I've seen that before too... but I'm still crying with laughter! ------------- Becca, mum of 2 girls & 3 boys |