Things you do to help you relax
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Forum Name: Planning Pregnancy (trying for baby)
Forum Description: Trying to get pregnant? Going through fertility treatment? Just planning your first or second child? There are many people out there in the same boat to help and listen and share with
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Topic: Things you do to help you relax
Posted By: Treen
Subject: Things you do to help you relax
Date Posted: 23 March 2009 at 9:33pm
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Hi girls, it seems the longer we TTC, the more I stress so I thought I'd ask you all what you like to do to relax. I just started yoga today, and I hope to to it 3 times a week if I can find the time. I'm hoping this will help.
I'm definitely not a calm person and I often find myself so wound up my hands shake. At the moment, this seems to be happening on average about 3 times a week (we're having a bad year). I also vent a lot of anger on my poor DH. Can anyone give me some relaxation tips and perhaps some recommendations on books? I know none of this is creating a good environment for a baby.  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Replies:
Posted By: T_Rex
Date Posted: 24 March 2009 at 7:22am
First of all,  to you. I'm sorry that you are feeling like that and I hope you get your BFP really soon.
I've been a bit highly strung myself lately. Not TTC related for me, just a million other things going on. I try to walk away from whatever it is that is upsetting me and don't come back till I'm completely over it - sometimes 10 minutes, sometimes several days! Things that I've found work for me include reading a good book, baking (not so good for the waistline though!), going for a walk, or hanging out with my pets, giving them a good grooming. Also sometimes I've found having a good cry helps. DH is being really good about it too, like your DH he is wearing anger that he doesn't deserve, so I am making sure that I apologise and cuddle him once I've settled down, and so he knows I'm just venting, not mad at him. You might be doing this already, but have you tried giving yourself treats each month that AF shows up? I figure each month is one more month that you'll have to save for the baby, so you can afford to get yourself a massage or something that you'd like. Maybe that would work for you? ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: JaneW
Date Posted: 24 March 2009 at 8:42am
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Yoga sounds like a good idea,I'm same as you Treen, stressing heaps and because I know it's not going to be very helpful with TTC that makes me worry even more! I was thinking of looking at yoga or meditation too just to calm me down!
Watching a movie/vid is one thing that helps me de-stress though when i have time, just takes my mind of my work for a while as life gets pretty hectic running my business! looking forward to hearing more ways to relax too... |
Posted By: Treen
Date Posted: 24 March 2009 at 9:56am
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Thanks for that T-rex and Jane, I'm also looking forward to winter as this year I'm going to get the spa cranking. We didn't have it going last year, but the year before we did and I remember that having one after dinner was very relaxing. Of course, back then I didn't need to relax! ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Flipsta
Date Posted: 24 March 2009 at 10:11am
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Hi Treen,
The TTC journey is really stressful at times and sometimes it just gets so overwhelming. I decided that I was sick and tired of constantly wondering, waiting, wishing so I entered some events like a 10k run, the stroke and stride at mission Bay and other things like that. Keeps me focused on something else. Exercise is definitely one of the best forms of stress relief. Walking, jogging, swimming, yoga, all sorts. It really helps and you are doing something good for your body too so that is all good. But hey if exercise is just not your thing then a nice massage is really good. I often (if the finances allow!) go and get a relaxing massage. I always feel so much better afterwards. I think treating yourself to something once a month or more or whatever, is really important. DH and I have been TTC #1 for 19 months now and each time AF arrives I go right I am going to enjoy a glass of wine, or get that massage or I go for a run or buy a nice moisturiser or something like that. I often think that we spend so much time getting stressed about conceving a bub and then as soon as one comes along it will get even more stressful so some time out is really important. I really hope you feel better soon and even better get that BFP!!  Just don't forget your needs at this time and keep positive.
All the best hun |
Posted By: IVFGirl1111
Date Posted: 24 March 2009 at 10:38am
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Its a hard road isnt it!
I have said now that every month IF AF arrives I am going to buy myself something that I REALLY want and that I wouldnt normally buy. Just around $50-$100 really and I think well if I was at home with a baby then I wouldnt have that money anyway so I dont feel bad at all about spending it! Know that your not alone in this I am sure we ALL feel like this from time to time and at the moment its your time to feel like this. So hang in there! Thinking of you  ------------- TTC 6 years IVF it is IVF/ICSI round one 10 eggs, 8 mature, 3 fertilised BFN IVF/ICSI #2 = 22 eggs! 20 mature, 15 fertilised, 1 fresh transfer and 2 frosties BFN 2 Frosties still in freezer thank god |
Posted By: Flipsta
Date Posted: 24 March 2009 at 10:44am
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Damn straight BooBoo!
I had a big bad time last month but better this month, no doubt it will hit me again soon .. ..what a roller coaster it is.
Thank goodness for OhBaby so we can vent out all our frustruations and thoughts... Just wanted to throw a few of these out there to everyone who is just feeling crappola at the moment.
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Posted By: monkey33
Date Posted: 25 March 2009 at 8:29pm
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Hugs to you treen
I am trying the treat thing too! We haven't been TTC that long yet but I was working myself up each month already, so made a pact to myself that I would buy a treat each time AF arrived - the same value as booboo $50-$100. I bought perfume last month and am going to go and get a massage this month if AF arrives. Ways that I relax: A nice long shower & early to bed with a good book, going for a long walk or meeting friends for a good catch up session, whether it be at home or out shopping or something. Socialising always takes my mind off whatever is bothering me. |
Posted By: RinTinTin
Date Posted: 25 March 2009 at 9:23pm
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Oh Treen, I'm sorry you're finding it hard with the long TTC.
I have started organsing girl pamper nights with my friends. I also work our dogs in obedience and agility...that is always good for taking your mind off TTC. Can't think about baby making when you're working dogs...just doesn't work. I also do crosswords, word fill-ins, so my mind if FORCED to think about what I'm doing and forgets about TTC for a moment. DP and I have also talked about ftaking dance classes. A good way to occupy yourself, exercise and do something with DP. The bond created in dancing will hopefully bring DP and I closer. Oh and treat yourself to massages!!! There are a few ideas. Hope it helps. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Nutella
Date Posted: 25 March 2009 at 11:58pm
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I tend to get most worked up at night when the light goes out and I am trying to sleep but all these thoughts run around my head. Anway, one time I was reading something and it was giving ideas on how to relax and the idea I know use is to imagine a ball of playdough or something like that. I take my negative thoughts or things that are worrying me and say okay tonight you can go away and push it into the playdough where I can't see it anymore and keep doing it for all the thoughts flying around!
Probably sounds a little weirdo but works for me! I think from memory it was supposed to be a balloon and then the balloon flies away or something but I like to keep the 'playdough within reach' so if anything else pops into brain I can shove it in! Anyway, that was a long rambling email but hey it works for me so might work for someone else too  ------------- 
 Oct 11
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Posted By: GuestGuest
Date Posted: 26 March 2009 at 12:57pm
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Nat, that sort of thing definitely works. I used to have a stressful job and would think about it all of the time and get worked up about it. Then I taught myself that when I start to think about something negative I immediately think about something positive to cancel it out. I started doing that , it took awhile to "retune" my brain but since then it is automatic. I no longer worry about anything for any longer than a couple of seconds. There is a difference between worrying about something, vs thinking about something in order to reach a solution. My motto is if you can't influence the result it is a waste of time worrying about it.
Talking it through can be helpful as well, as long as the person you are talking to isn't trying to solve the problem for you... it is good just to vent at times and try to let it go. Failing that booze is always good 
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Posted By: kriss
Date Posted: 06 April 2009 at 10:27pm
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That sounds like good logic Little Sal
I find fresh air really calming, either going for a walk or a drive, or even sticking my head out the window lol (I don't have a deck or back yard). Stretching to music helps clear my head too, reading usually distracts me long enough to relax and cooking or baking tends to take my mind off things for a bit too. Painting or some form of art could be a good way to direct your feelings/thoughts? I'm not much of an artist, but it works for some of my friends. Hugs Treen, I hope your yoga is helping and that your BFP is in the very near future ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
 Little Angel, April 10
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