I’m so upset!
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Topic: I’m so upset!
Posted By: KiwiL
Subject: I’m so upset!
Date Posted: 27 July 2009 at 10:06am
I feel like everything with Jackson is one big set back after another. 
I have just had a call from his Porse carer to tell me that she is in some financial trouble and can't just look after Jackson one day a week anymore. She needs kids full time so she's gone ahead and organised two other babies to start in two weeks, and is therefore giving us notice. We put J in care one day a week so the carer could get used to feeding him with the NG tube and get used to feeding him full stop. We clicked really well with the carer and Jackson took to her well too. I am so upset that she didn't speak to us first. I have to go back to work in 4 weeks, and would have strongly considered starting his four day a week care early. That would have been so much easier than trying to find, and train, and new carer. If I had an easy baby, this wouldn't matter so much, but right now it is just feeling like another kick in the guts. I have and am trying so, so hard with Jackson, and nothing ever gets better. I just wish for once we could get some good news and not things that make me more sad. When are we going to catch a break? 
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Replies:
Posted By: peanut butter
Date Posted: 27 July 2009 at 10:10am
| Sorry no advice but I can go grrrrrrrrrr for you and offer hugs |
Posted By: Snappy
Date Posted: 27 July 2009 at 10:11am
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Awwww
I would have expected that she would have approached you first as well. Surely a week wouldnt have mattered to much in the long run. I really hope you get this sorted, sounds like you've had a rough time. P.S Where abouts in WGTN are you based? Im a porse caregiver 
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Posted By: Henna79
Date Posted: 27 July 2009 at 10:30am
 Laurie. You so deserve a break and I hope one comes your way soon.
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Posted By: KiwiL
Date Posted: 27 July 2009 at 10:36am
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Aw, Kylie, we're in Tawa.
You know, the more I think about it, I feel that the reason the carer didn't talk to us is because Jackson is in the too hard basket. Why would she want Jackson full time if she could have a normal baby full time? Maybe I am being oversensitive, but he is so hard to feed, maybe it was too much? I just don't know how we'll find another carer who will be able to be bothered with my little boy. This is so hard and I am so scared. |
Posted By: Snappy
Date Posted: 27 July 2009 at 11:02am
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Im sure you will Kiwilaurie. I have a little deaf boy that is definately more work than another child his age, but he is really rewarding. YOU WILL find someone.
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Posted By: catisla
Date Posted: 27 July 2009 at 1:46pm
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Hugs Laurie - i really understand why you are so upset - I'm sure you will find a carer who will love Jackson. he is such a lovely wee boy ------------- |
Posted By: peanut butter
Date Posted: 27 July 2009 at 2:04pm
| OT but I didnt realise you were having such troubles. I remember all the trouble at the start with feeding and teeth etc but didnt realise it is still ongoing to the point on an NG tube......you poor thing!! Hope things improve. Maybe you are going to have a dream teenager...polite, helpful, tidy etc to make up for the tough start. |
Posted By: noodle
Date Posted: 27 July 2009 at 2:10pm
Ditto chick! huge huge 's coming your way!!! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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nzpiper wrote:Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 27 July 2009 at 2:16pm
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Can you not get in touch with Porse to find you someone else who will be willing to care for him? ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">   [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: kiwisj
Date Posted: 27 July 2009 at 3:14pm
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hun. There WILL be someone who would LOVE to care for Jackson, I hope you find them soon. ------------- SJ Callum - Dec 2008 Daniel - Oct 2010 |
Posted By: KiwiL
Date Posted: 27 July 2009 at 4:15pm
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Thanks guys. Yes, we've been in touch with Porse and I am sure they'll find us another carer. It's just unfair as it takes a bit to get used to feeding Jackson, so we started J's care early so the carer could get used to it before he had to be full time. Now that was a waste of time and money, wasn't it?!?
I really believe the carer has put it in the too hard basket, which is fine and I understand, but I just wish she'd say that instead of other stuff, and I wish she'd spoken to me first before just calling to say that she was replacing Jackson with another kid. Porse have been really good, they were quite horrified by what happened and are going to focus on finding a carer who is doing it for the love of children, not for financial reasons. |
Posted By: mummyofprinces
Date Posted: 27 July 2009 at 9:23pm
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I wish I was near you, I would totally love to help you out hun!!!
Hope you find someone ASAP and big Grrr at the waste of money! -------------   
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Posted By: BeLoved
Date Posted: 27 July 2009 at 9:50pm
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big hugs to you Laurie! I hope you find someone who will be perfect for looking after Jackson. And I so understand your frustration with the previous carer not being honest about why she cannot care for Jackson, but just think she the one who has to live with being dishonest, and I bet deep down she feels really guilty. Its good to know that Porse are aware that they need to find a carer who is not just doing it for financial reasons.
Things will turn around for you and your family I am sure, I would feel just the same way if I was in your position but I don't know if I would be able to do the amazing job that you are doing! ------------- http://alterna-tickers.com"> 
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Posted By: KiwiL
Date Posted: 27 July 2009 at 10:55pm
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Thanks for all of the positive comments guys. I don't feel like I am doing a good job, a lot of the time I barely feel like I can keep my head above water. It's the hardest thing I have been through in my whole life.
But, after saying we never get a break, I saw a glimmer of hope tonight. Jackson went in his high chair and for the first time in ages he started eating his finger food. He chomped away on marmite toast, and he gagged like crazy and even vomited once, but he kept putting it back into his mouth. And usually his vomits would be stomach emptying, but he controlled himself, and even took a little potato from a spoon. It sounds like such a simple thing for a 10 month old, but for Jackson (who normally nibbles cruskits only) it was huge. I felt so uplifted. Which makes me believe that we can get rid of this tube. With the support of an amazing Australian forum for tube fed babies that I have found, I have decided that in two weeks we are going to take out the tube and give Jackson another chance. I know he can do it, and I just pray that he will. Thanks again for the hugs and comments, boy did I need them today! |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 27 July 2009 at 10:55pm
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Hugs Laurie . I hope Porse have a few choice words to say to the carer, that's pretty poor on her part!
I know it sounds trite, but it WILL get easier. It's really, really hard to see when you're in the middle of the chaos, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel and you will get there. I look back at everything I've been thru with the gremlins and I can't believe we survived, it just seems like way more than any one person could handle, but we got thru, and now things are awesome. You'll get there! More hugs. -------------  Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: catisla
Date Posted: 28 July 2009 at 12:09pm
 yay Jackson! It is such a good feeling isn't it!
Marmite toast is one of the only finger foods Catriona eats too 
and you do an excellent job Laurie - you are a wonderful mother ------------- |
Posted By: Snappy
Date Posted: 28 July 2009 at 12:14pm
Oh thats awesome Laurie 
Hang in there, you are doing such a great job by the sound of it. In terms of porse, make sure you get plenty of people to interview, maybe gather some questions you'd like to ask them. Im sure there will be someone out there for Jackson, its just a matter of sorting through them all 
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Posted By: ISpyCharlie
Date Posted: 28 July 2009 at 1:06pm
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I hope things get better for you and Jackson, you are doing such a great job, I admire your will ! ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 28 July 2009 at 10:41pm
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LOL we cross posted Laurie
Two weeks huh, exciting! Best of luck! ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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