working mums - how do YOU do it?
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Topic: working mums - how do YOU do it?
Posted By: lizzle
Subject: working mums - how do YOU do it?
Date Posted: 28 July 2009 at 9:25pm
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I work fulltime as a teacher (leave at 8 ,home by 3;30 if i don't have meetings), but am finding life pretty hard right now. Between spending time with the kids, planning and marking for work, cooking tea, and general hygiene for myself, housework is just out the window.
how on earth do you working mums manage to get stuff done, hang out with the kids as well as go to work? Am not necessarily looking for what I can do, just what others do - might give us some ideas. |
Replies:
Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 28 July 2009 at 9:34pm
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Different working situation, but I can come home at lunchtime sometimes and get some washing done, and make dinner then so that when we get home the boys have that time with us. Sometimes when Nigel is working mornings I go back into work at night to do stuff so I can take time off during the day (nice boss I have to do that). ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: emz
Date Posted: 28 July 2009 at 9:38pm
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I'll be watching this with interest as am planning on going on teaching (primary - as a beginning teacher lol) start/mid next year, so kids will be 2 and a few months, and DH is never around.
Would love to know how many people find the financial benefits vs. stress thing worth it lol as it doesn't seem to stack up very well, or is that just me? |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 28 July 2009 at 10:11pm
I have a nanny and a cleaner, so between them they do most of the housework  . I know that makes us sound a) rich and b) pretentious, but in reality we are neither - having a nanny is the cheapest form of childcare when you have four kids, and the cleaner is $60 a week and worth every cent as it means I can spend my 'spare' (ha ha) time with the kids doing fun stuff and not worrying about how long it is since the bathroom was cleaned.
I love being a working mum, love, love, love it. Yes, it is stressful and sometimes there just aren't enough hours in the day, but finding a good balance means that I can exercise my brain doing a job I enjoy as well as getting to hang out with the kids, plus the extra $$$ it brings in means we have a bit more flexibility with stuff like extracurricular activities, we've even managed a holiday on the Gold Coast right now -------------  Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 28 July 2009 at 10:15pm
i am not a working mum but i was going to suggest a cleaner... throw away your guilt and let someone else do some work for you! ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
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Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 29 July 2009 at 6:47am
| unfortunately the money is well-stretched right now and a cleaner just doesn't fit....although give me a few months and I may change my mind |
Posted By: AandCsmum
Date Posted: 29 July 2009 at 8:17am
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Can you find a friend or word of mouth cleaner that does a couple of hours for around $20? Not a cleaning company cause they are SO expensive
That is what my Mum used to do. ------------- Kel http://lilypie.com"> 
A = 01.02.04 & C = 16.01.09 & G = 30.03.12 |
Posted By: Febgirl
Date Posted: 29 July 2009 at 9:39am
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I work part time (32/hr week), 3 days in the office and 8 hours from home over the rest of the week. 18-month old DD goes to daycare those 3 days. DH works full time 5 days a week, and the odd weekend as well. I really love it, it's the best of both worlds here.
On office days we all get up around 7:30am and drive into the city together - DH works close to me so he drops DD and I off, I take her to daycare then walk to the office 5 mins away. DD will often eat breakfast in the car if we're running late, toast is pretty portable! I pick her up at 5pm, DH picks us up about 15 mins later and we drive home, have dinner together around 6pm, playtime after dinner, then DD goes to bed 7pm - 7:30pm. I then lie on the couch for the rest of the evening! I'm really fortunate that my work is flexi-hours and I'm in a senior position so get a bit more tolerance for coming in late and leaving early - it wouldn't work otherwise. I've found easiest thing is to be organised and plan out your dinners for the week in advance and make sure it's quick/easy cook things on office days. Housework is saved mainly for weekends, although I try to catch up on laundry on my non-office days. Once bubba #2 is here and I go back to work, we're going to get a cleaner in once a week to help out. I can honestly say that I don't find life particularly stressful although I do get a bit grumpy when the house is a mess - DH is very good at recognising when I'm about to have a hissy fit about it and telling me to go and sit down while he tidies up. It would more stressful if I was working 5 days a week in the office, so again we are lucky that I'm able to just work 3 days a week. I imagine things are going to get a bit more complicated when bubba #2 is here, but I'm sure we'll make it work. ------------- Two little girls under 2! 
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Posted By: Peanut
Date Posted: 29 July 2009 at 10:03am
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I am also a teacher so work similar hours to you but also work a Sat morning at another job.
I have a cleaner come every 2 weeks - means the house is throughly cleaned every 2 weeks and I can doa quick dust, vaccum and clean in the week that she is not there. I work similar hours to you. My big thing during the school day is that I work in my morning tea, lunch hour and free periods. I know it seems antisocial but does buy me more time with DS at the end of the day. Any extra marking is done at home at night but only do that once or twice a week - def not every night. I explain to the kids that work may take 1-2 weeks for them to get back as I have children etc and must are OK with this. Def plan your meals for the week and make sure you get the meat out in the morning. I stick to the basics for meals - pasta dishes, basic meat and vege as simpler to cook and ytou know it will be eaten. Washing is done at night and hang out in the morning so only do a load a day in the end but do 2 or 3 on the weekends. I put dishwasher on every night and empty it while DS has breakfast in the morning - fold the washing and put it away then to. Am happy to answer teacher related questions though about how my day works etc. I think you are secondary too. Emz, I don't honestly think I would bother with full time teaching and 2 little kids. I am not sure that your own kids would get the best of you by the end of the day. I have no intentions of going back to teaching until my oldest is at school. -------------  
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Posted By: Andriea
Date Posted: 29 July 2009 at 10:08am
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Right now Im on mat leave but before this I worked 8-5 mon-fri and about every 3rd weekend, DH works splits tue-sat so hes barely home, we have 5 children 10,7,4,2,1. I would put the washing in before I left and Dh would hang it out and do veges for dinner or put on a crockpot before he went to work. After picking everyone up after work I'd get home turn dinner on, bath the younger ones while dinner was cooking. After T hang time with the younger ones then bed for them at 7. Time to help older ones with homework hang with them till bed at 9. Then I would get in washing and fold it, tidy up kitchen, vacuum and any housework. Then It would be time to sort out work for the next day. By this stage it was about 1130. DH would arrive home and so we would spend a bit of time together and hit the hay about 1am. I was pretty much knackered all the time especially once I got preggie with this one which is why Ive finished work so early, but we found keeping to the same routine got everything done and everyone got some time with me. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: xLUCKYx
Date Posted: 29 July 2009 at 11:33am
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I work part-time, leave home at 8:50 to drop kids off, start work at 9:30, finish work at 2 and we usually get home by 3. However we often go visiting grandparents and buddies during at least 2 - 3 afternoons a week.
I find I go through phases of managing my time really well, and then getting exausted with it and letting things slide for a few days - for the sake of my sanity :) Anyhoo - the way I cope is by being super organised! I plan our meals for the entire week in advance and shop once a week. I cook in the crock pot when possible, or make meals that can be eaten 2 nights in a row or make 2 meals one night so dont cook the next. Also get DP to cook a few times a week. We do washing daily. I put it on, DP hangs and brings it in, I fold while watching telly when kids are asleep. We keep on top of general house tidyness as we go. Dishes always done, bits and pieces always put away as we go or at end of day when kids in bed. Wipe the bathroom down at end of day. Vacumning, we take turns every other day - Gabrielle 'helps'. We do a big clean on the weekend, sometimes taking turns with cleaning/playing with kids. Most of the tidying during week happens when kids are asleep :) I stay up real late most nights needless to say! So thats how it goes 90% of the time. Every now and then I get 'over it' and relax a couple nights in a row and deal with the back log later - gonna go crazy being busy all the time otherwise... |
Posted By: Bombshell
Date Posted: 29 July 2009 at 12:31pm
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we work full time long hours and sometimes weekend work or work commitments after hours and are setting up a new web business to run alon gisde our work...I would love to have a cleaner etc..and may do that in time
we make sure we spend quality time with bubs after work and on weekends and are very involved i her daycare etc etc - often this means leavign housework etc to the side...oh well... 
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Posted By: EmDee
Date Posted: 29 July 2009 at 12:40pm
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DH and I both work full-time (40 hours) and it's tough. We are lucky that my mum looks after the kids on Mondays and Tuesdays and even though I tell her she doesn't have to, she does a lot of housework (dishes, laundry, vacuuming etc). We pay her $50.00 week because she does so much for us. For the rest of the week we do what we can after the kids go to bed.
I guess the biggest thing I've found is to 'try' and stay on top of things. Its seems the bigger the pile of dishes (or laundry) get the longer it takes for either DH or I to get around to doing them! We try to be as organised as possible like getting clothes, lunches, bags ready the night before for the following day (ironing, lunch, kids bags). We take turns cooking dinner (& like Peanut keep it to easy meals with little prep time) so that one of us can spend time with the kids while the other is cooking. We always make sure we sit down together at dinner and breakfast times so we can talk with the kids. Its far from perfect, there are days when I just can't be a*sed and so the dishes/laundry wait for another day. Sometimes there are other things that are more important - spending time with kids/DH or even just some time to myself. I found when I first went back to work after having Lilia I wasn't looking after myself very well and it made it harder to cope with everything. From the start of the year I've been trying to look after myself better (eating well - most of the time, getting a bit more exercise and taking vitamins). I feel much better for it and so far haven't been sick this winter. Anyway sorry for rambling on a bit, hope something in there helps! ------------- DS 8 DD 6 DS 4 DD 2 |
Posted By: Candkids
Date Posted: 29 July 2009 at 5:34pm
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i work 8.30-2pm mon - fri ( by choice as DH is always reminding me)
and dh works 8-6 pretty much 7days a week, we own a business DH works for himself which gives him a bit of flexability, but he still doesnt really help me out, im up at 6am then i get ready kids are up 6.45-7 then its the breakfast & getting dressed battle, have to be out the door by 7.50 to drop jett off accross town , then sarah at school then i have to find a park for work im usually at work 8.30-40 then when i finish at 2pm i pick j up & sarah from school then its home, dinner, homework, bath bed, then i get all their stuff ready for the next day, clean & do the washing . . . . . . ahhhhh exhausting just typing it all . . the house is usually a mess, which dh likes to moan about. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  DD 10.5yrs DS 6yrs DS 11mths 5 little angles watching from above |
Posted By: hannibal
Date Posted: 29 July 2009 at 8:08pm
| I work full time too! Hubby is pretty good at helping out with feeding bubs in the morning while I'm getting ready. The night time rush is a joint effort. I liked the idea of getting a cleaner - just suggested it to hubby who says he likes cleaning! GREAT! He is self employed so in winter it is easier and he doesn't have to go to work so early or be there so late - in summer that idea might get relooked at, otherwise we are pretty good and keeping the place pretty tidy. |
Posted By: LittleBug
Date Posted: 29 July 2009 at 8:11pm
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On Mondays and Tuesday's here, the kids are in daycare from 8.30ish until 5.30pm. Wednesday I have a day "off" from uni and study so I get to spend the day looking after the babies and trying to get on top of the mess... I actually love having that day to spend with the kids. Thurs and Fri I'm back at uni, but Friday is DH's day off work and he does what I do on Weds (look after kids and washing etc... although the house is generally a shambles after he looks after the kids, lol).
Generally we chuck washing on in the morning whilst getting breakfast and stuff, and it sits there until the evening after the kids are in bed, when we hang it on clothes horses (not enough sun down here atm to bother with hanging washing outside). Vacuuming gets done whenever the house badly needs it and the kids are happily doing something, sometime so that DH or I can get it done. Toys are tidied as we go, like as we move on to another room (eg. toys in lounge get chucked back into toybox just as we are going to have dinner, etc). Dinner is always something re-heated from the night before, for us. DH and I eat once he gets home at 7.30pm, after the kids bed-time, and we muck something up if it hasn't been done during the day. Otherwise it is default quick food (frozen veg, fruit, rice, heated meals from freezer, just easy quick things). I would totally love a crock pot, I'm into stews that are easy to chuck together and ignore until it's time to eat. I do the dishes from during the day, while Chloe is eating her dinner, in between getting Ollie tended to as well. DH does the night time dishes when he is having breakfast with Chloe and Ollie in the morning. The bathroom and toilet and stuff get done at the weekend. Things like the kitchen floor are badly neglected... ours hasn't been cleaned for nearly a month and REALLY needs it. I generally only get a shower every few days  but have one in the evening if I really need it.
The house is never pin-neat and I'm always feeling exhausted but I really enjoy being back at Med School as well... and I really appreciate spending time with the kids more. When the babies want attention, generally I give it to them and ignore housework, and then do the housework when they are happily distracted, or asleep for the night. Keeps us happy that way and I still get to "spend time" with them while they are awake. Just means the house stays messy sometimes. I would totally love to get a cleaner in, it would make a world of difference. Sorry for the mammoth post! ETA: I don't know how I would cope if DH left all the housework to me... he does just as much as I do. Everything is a shared task in our house. ------------- Chloe (4 years) and Oliver (3 years). |
Posted By: emz
Date Posted: 29 July 2009 at 10:13pm
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So great to hear how everyone manages, or tries to manage it!
Peanut, unfortunately I don't think I'll have much choice in the working full time thing. I'd love 3-4 days a week but try finding that in CHCH! It's one thing that I'll probably need to do to take the pressure off our relationship a bit (and probably put different pressures on but oh well). Anyway, as you were... |
Posted By: yummymummy
Date Posted: 29 July 2009 at 10:23pm
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Both DH & I work full time.
DH starts quite early - at 7am so he's out ofthe door at 6:30am. I wake up then and have a shower & cup of coffee before the kids wake up at 7am They have thier bottle and then we muck around until 8:30am - I get them dressed during this time and we play - this is our time
I give them b'fast at 8:30am and get ready for work while they eat. We leave the house just before 9am and I drop them off at daycare. DH picks them up from daycare at around 4pm and brings them home for a snack & play time. He gets dinner ready and I come home at around 6pm - we then eat dinner. More play time after that until the girls have bottles & go to bed. Working fulltime is not that bad - it actually works quite well for us ETA - I do all clothes washing on Wednesday night and on the Weekend. We do a big house clean on the weekend too and run the dishwasher every night. I cook dinner 3-4 times a week and DH does the rest - he's quite a good cook actually. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: CuriousG
Date Posted: 30 July 2009 at 8:01am
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I worked fulltime until recently and now I don't work Wednesday's. However, my day starts at 5.30am, I am out the door at 6.30am and I don't get home until 5.30-6pm each night.
I used to have the perfectly clean and tidy house. Not anymore. I literally had to let it go as I couldn't keep up. We had a cleaner for a while but the thing I needed even more help with was the garden so I ditched the cleaner and got a gardener instead. Its DH's job to look after DD in the morning/afternoons as he works 9.30 - 4pm. He is also responsible for making her breakfast and lunch for daycare, getting her dressed etc in the mornings. I still cook dinner most nights when I get home. I also try to do a load of washing every 2nd day. Wednesdays are now spent cleaning up the house and doing even more washing, winter seems to do that. We try to split the chores and its my job to do the toilet and bathroom while DH vaccums the entire house once a week and folds the washing/puts it away (two things I hate doing). We share the responsibility of keeping the kitchen clean/loading and unloading the dishwasher etc. You know, its not easy but you do kind of get into the groove of it eventually. And getting into regular habits helps, like certain days for certain things. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: AzzaNZ
Date Posted: 31 July 2009 at 12:04pm
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I keep looking at this thread and wanting to answer... but I'll have to get back to you on this.
We leave the house at 07h00 and get back at 18h15. I manage to juggle work, Isabella, cooking, bath time etc but the cleaning and stuff is either done by my DH late at night or over a weekend. |
Posted By: jaz
Date Posted: 01 August 2009 at 10:13am
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I work 8-4 and DP 5-9 so we have a bit of a tag team going. He can get the washing sorted out through the day and I use the crockpot a lot to keep meals quick and easy. The good thing about getting home at 4.20pm is I have time to put my feet up before the dinner, dishes, making lunches, baths/showers routine starts. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: ButterflyMum
Date Posted: 01 August 2009 at 10:26am
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Ok so I think you should find a cleaner!.
Anyway I have to say to all you fulltime working Mum's you are amazing so much respect for you all I could not do it. I was thinking about it a while ago then relised its not prwctical for us as it would cost more in childcare then I can earn I nanny or cheeckout girl so not high enough paying. and to be honest I don't think I would cope. Anyway jsut wanted to say you guy's are amazing. -------------  
 
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Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 01 August 2009 at 11:02am
| september we are going to look into it. i think someone has a cleaner once a fortnight - we figure we can cope with that - financially and the in-between times. But august is absymal money wise - rego due (anyone not paid yours since July? - you need to have a glass of wine before you find the price hike), lawyers fee for the new house due, dog rego was just paid, 3 monthly bin due as well as ....something I'm forgetting, anyway, leaves us with $50 spare for the month....that sounds tragic but takes into account a wee bit of spending money so will be fine...just no spare for cleaners. |
Posted By: Peanut
Date Posted: 01 August 2009 at 12:21pm
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lizzle - thats me that has a fortnightly cleaner! It is great as at least you know that your house gets 2 really good cleans a month! We pay $40 for about 2.5 hours -cash obviously. -------------
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Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 01 August 2009 at 12:43pm
| pity you dont live near here so i could borrow yours! |
Posted By: grrrgrrrr
Date Posted: 01 August 2009 at 8:49pm
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I have a an awesome father in law that helps in the mornings with looking after Mattias and then a nanny in the afternoon (was not able to get childcare as the waitign lists are too long and once I return to work after this bubba it is cheaper with a nanny than daycare)
I also have started getting a cleaner in as the house started to resemble a warzone! I approached student job search they have lots of people with experience and that are happy to do littl ejobs aroudn the house. I work 40hours a week and have a partned that is away every second weekend so sparetime is a valuable thing to me. I was stressing quite a bit about the housework until I decided to bite the bullet and hire someone to do it for me and I am a much happier person now. ------------- Mattias 2yo Henrik almost 1 |
Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 03 August 2009 at 3:20pm
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Housework... hrmmm... I just don't do it.
Is that an option?? Actually... you know what has enabled me to have a bit more time? Not having the internet at home! It's amazing. But yeah, feeling ya at the moment. Each spare minute of my time is devoted to study or knitting stuff for my exhbition thingy.
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Posted By: workingMom
Date Posted: 05 August 2009 at 12:54pm
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Hi all
DH and I both work full time, he from 6-4.30 and me normal business hour. My boss is pretty good and I do lots of work after hour and sometimes during weekend (from home) so my time is flexible, though you end up working more than 40 hours per week. But it's the price for flexibility I suppose. My baby is usually up around 7.30-8 am. I've got her to drink milk then watch her reading, math, art lessons in my laptop with some songs in between for breaks (max to 1/2 hour). Then changing clothes, nappy if need to, then off to her daycare (in time for the morning tea). When I get to my office it is usually 9-9.30 even 10am. I work during lunch hour, stay late, bring work home, you name it to get work done. On the day I have to be at work early than 9-9.30 then I will drop the lessons to do it at night before her bed time. DH pick DD up after work, cook her dinner, feed her, bath her, get her watch her whole brain lessons on DVD (8 min for 1 lesson), Chinese lesson on DVD (1-2 min for 1 lesson), listening to some music depending on the day and their mood. Of course DD play with lots of toys in the evening as well, usually while listening to music or French tape. I usually get home while she is eating or when she is off to bed reading some books before sleeping (ranging between 6.30pm - 8pm). Then I usually take over because DD wants me when I'm around. DH cooks our dinner while I look after DD, usually until she sleeps. DH and I hardly have dinner together, we usually take turn to eat dinner. After DD sleeps, we do the household chores that can not wait til weekend: cleaning dishes, DD bath, clearing toys, sometimes washing clothes. We leave other things to weekend (grocery shopping, real cleaning of bathroom, big loads of washing etc...). Sometimes I still have to work after DD sleeps so DH will do these things himself. He's really wonderful. When we wash clothes at night, I will hang them up in the morning when DD is still sleeping. I usually get up at 5am same time with DH. When he prepare lunch for us (meaning putting left over from dinner into 2 boxes for us to carry to work) then go to work, I feed DD 1st milk of the day (while she is still sleeping - yes otherwise she would get up for feeling so hungry - and yes she lets us know it's time to feed her since she is rolling around making noise with eyes still closed). When he is out (just before 6 am) I hang clothes out (we have the clothes air dryer inside house, it's good especially when it rains outside), clear toys (if not done it the night before), have breakfast, then work from my laptop or do some research on early learning for DD until DD wakes up. My husband can work longer hours but we think the time like now suits us more. Less money but he can have time with DD and help around the house. Saying that, my house is often in a mess as we leave lots of things to the weekend. Then we want to spend time with DD during weekends, taking her out having fun, etc.. so not much time left during weekends either. Not to mention we have to worry about 3 meals, 2 snack time for her each day of the weekends. But what's more important she is only little once and time flies. Then I have not seen any of you mentioning about sick days. My DD is sick a lot since going to the daycare. DH and I take turn staying home looking after her during those days. That means DH actually takes time off work nearly every week. It cuts into our finance quite a bit as he does not get paid while off work. I've been trying to find some other families to share nanny as with nanny kids get sick less, but to no success alas. So DD still goes to daycare and still get sick nearly every week. Needless to say we hardly watch TV these days, nor going out to cinema or dinners. Actually I found that cutting out the dinners and lunch bits saves heaps on money, which then gone into investment for DD education and toys (both expensive). In the future we will need to make time at night after DD sleeps to prepare learning materials for DD like flashcards, lapbook, etc... Just another thing to add on the list. |
Posted By: workingMom
Date Posted: 05 August 2009 at 1:18pm
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By the way
what can you get the cleaner to do for $60 per week? Is there any options for less? If it's affordable, I would like to look into it and have more time doing fun things with DD. thanks. |
Posted By: Peanut
Date Posted: 05 August 2009 at 2:09pm
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I am in CHCH so not sure where you are but at the moment my cleaner is coming weekly (dropping back to fortnightly at the end of the month).
She is at my house for about 2.5 hours and I pay $40. For this she: Makes our bed with clean sheets - I strip the bed and put sheets in the washing machine. Irons clothes - usually about 10 items. Usual cleaning like bathroom, toilet, kitchen etc. Dusts and polishes. Vaccums - moves all furniture out to do this. Cleans wood and tile floors. Usually hangs out a load of washing as I have left it in the machine. Puts the rags in the washing machine and turns it on when she leaves. Wipes out pantry for us. Our house is always tidy on cleaning day as don't think she should have to sort out our untidiness before she can clean so that helps. Lots of other little things that I can't think of. Much better to get a word of mouth recommendation than go thru a company as you pay less and can set the requirements. -------------
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