Christmas this year in my family
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Category: General Chat
Forum Name: General Chat
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URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=29511
Printed Date: 05 October 2025 at 9:13am
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Topic: Christmas this year in my family
Posted By: Lisha
Subject: Christmas this year in my family
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 3:04pm
Once again, I have been mailed the "who is buying for who" Christmas pressie list, and once again, I am buying for DH and vice versa as we can't afford the whopping $100 per pressie!!   Can't believe it! This is all my sister in laws mother fault. My brothers are quiet well on being dairy farmers.
Do you think this is a wee bit too much?!! There is no way we can afford this, but they don't invloveus as we haven't got much money!! - The girls birthdays all at the start of Dec. Christmas this year is in the Malborough Sounds and getting there alone is costing the earth. If I had the balls, I would say something, so instead, I sit and nod and say nothing. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Replies:
Posted By: clover
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 3:09pm
| wow, $100 per present! We're probably considered fairly well off (childless with reasonable incomes) and I wouldn't imagine spending that on a gift, even if it was instead of buying for everyone. I would have thought even $50 was a lot. |
Posted By: Lisha
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 3:17pm
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I prefer not to give pressies this year. This is what we are doing on DH's side of the family... just giving pressies to the kids. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Bobbie
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 3:34pm
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Wow that's pricey!
We're doing a $10 limit for pressies this year because there are 2 of us with babies and one student so no one has much to splash around and we don't want to make it stressful. DH's family used to do a similar thing where you all had to buy for one of the nieces/nephews (and it was a big family). Idea was you drew a name out of a hat and then bought for that person. Problem was that then the parents would tell you what to buy and it was usually pretty expensive. In the end we had to say that we really weren't into it - and luckily it turned out a lot of the other family members weren't either - it was difficult though as we were the only couple who didn't have kids at that stage so we worried we were coming across as tight. Anyway the parents who were dictating pressie ideas thought they were being helpful so chances are that your SIL thinks she's being nice by just getting you to buy for each other. I bet you guys aren't the only ones who think $100 is a lot. Maybe you should suggest a review of the system before next Christmas. Just explain that you would love the chance to buy for other people. -------------  
 
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Posted By: mummyofprinces
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 4:05pm
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I cant believe they are doing it again!
That is just way too much money and totally disrespectful to you guys. I got so mad about this for you last year, I just cant believe how selfish they are being!!!!! Grrrr.... I think $50 is more than enough! -------------   
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 4:34pm
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That's a lot I don't spend that much on DH he gets $50 and that's the most I spend.
My brother and I haven't given each other presents since his kids were born, I buy for my nieces only. and my Dad has asked me not to buy any presents for him this year either as I've been out of work this year and only just getting back on my feet I'm baking fudge and biscuits and prob making jam instead. Now we give presents from both DH and I to our families not separate ones. Personally I think there should never be a $ amount set for Christmas presents. A gift shouldn't be compulsory. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">   [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: jazzy
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 5:21pm
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Oh how rude is that???
We try & set a limit for our 3 kids & buy for the youngest kids in the family that we see. We do photo prezzy for family & I think I will do baking also (thanks mrsg) I have told DH that its for the kids this year, as he usually has expensive things in mind for him (as if he does not get enough during the year). We are on 1 wage after I was made redundant a yr ago, & got debt free so I refuse to over spend cause it is xmas, just want to make sure the kids have a fantastic day 
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Posted By: rachelsea
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 5:39pm
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Wow $100!!!!!!! That's just crazy!!! In my DH's family we do secret santa and it's $30 a gift. We wouldn't do it if it was $100! My family is only buy for the kids (of which there are two now hehe but everyone buys them something) which works well too ------------- DD 4yrs DS 2yrs http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: Lisha
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 5:56pm
Haha thanks melnel! For your support once again  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: jazzy
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 6:05pm
| What limit do people put on there kids prezzy? |
Posted By: Lisha
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 6:19pm
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Kids are $15 :)
------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: EmDee
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 6:36pm
$100! 
DH's family used to do a similar thing, but the limit was like $20-$30. Now that eveyone has kids, we only buy for nephews & nieces, and we limit that to $20 each (which will probably be reviewed this year anyway as there are now 9 kids!). My mum, MIL and FIL still tend to give the adults gifts (chocolates, vouchers etc) though its per couple, rather than per person. And to be honest we still give them small gift too - though again just a small something, I think this year will be baking too! DH's extended family do this game where everyone buys a present ($5-$10) and puts them in a pile in the middle. Everyone draws a number and gets to pick a present in that order. The first person picks their present and opens it. The next person has the choice to steal that present or open another one. A present can be stolen twice before it becomes safe. Anyway its a bit of fun for the adults and you still end up with a present  ------------- DS 8 DD 6 DS 4 DD 2 |
Posted By: minik8e
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 7:15pm
| We do similar to mummydee with DH's family, except the limit is $20. Even the stealing thing. With my family, I just buy Mum and Dad a pressie each. No idea how it will work with the kids this year!!! |
Posted By: Guests
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 7:41pm
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wow $ 100 thats excessive !!!
With Dh family this year we put names in a hat and you can buy/make a present for that person. I will buy for my younger brother (he's 11 ) but thats it. Sometimes it seems people forget Christmas is about being with the people you love and care about , rather than expensive gifts. |
Posted By: peanut butter
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 7:45pm
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I cant believe they are doing this! However.....surely its a $100 MAXIMUM, not minimum....so you could just spend what you can afford and nothing more. Make a gift etc. If the person receiving it is not appreciative then they didnt deserve it in the first place and need a good kick in the pants! Noone should ever have to spend more than they can or want to on a present.
That would (has) piss me off!
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Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 8:44pm
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woah! in my family I am an only child - so no buying for siblinbgs..hehe. we don't buy for my DH's siblings too. they bought for us a few years ina row, but i still don't. we buy something for the kids - this year i'm making presents. we buy for my parents, his parents, and my nana and the kids make a present for each of them too.
$100 for a present - well we could afford that, but I still think it's excessive. $50 tops would be for me....but more like $30 to be honest. |
Posted By: Babe
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 9:22pm
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Wow! The only person we'd spend that much money on is Jake lol everyone else gets $20-30 max if anything at all!
Hope you can sort it out chick coz thats ridiculous!! -------------   
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Posted By: mummyofprinces
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 9:28pm
No probs hun, maybe I should have a chat with them
We are doing professional family photo and a small photo book of the first 6 months of Jake for the parents this year. Will do same small photo book for my sister, brother and DH brother. I send my neice and nephew $50 for their bday and chrissy and my sister buys them something and puts my card on it. (They are in aussie) -------------
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Lisha wrote:Posted By: myfullhouse
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 9:35pm
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That is pricey! In my family we do a $50 per pressie draw for my immediate family (parents, bros, SILs) and a $30 draw that included extended familym(aunts, uncles, cousins). We all agreed on the limits and I am fine with them as I spend heaps less than I used to.
With DH's family I think we are only buying for the kids as SIL is struggling a bit I think altho I love xmas so might buy something small for MIL, FIL and SIL as well as the kids. ------------- Lindsey 
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Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 9:49pm
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You could get something that looks exp and give it (I'm sure you don't have to show them prices??) or You and DP could just spend what you want to spend seeing as you're buying for each other!!
It's tough when theres heaps of Birthdays round Xmas too! I seem to have this problem with 3 birthdays in december and 2 in jan. Perhaps you could do something creative with photos from previous family xmas' like in an album? ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: hannibal
Date Posted: 22 October 2009 at 10:00pm
| We do the same of DH family they want a price of $50ish but I will only buy up to $40 max. It costs us by the time we fly home, car hire, accommodation, petrol etc for a week away over $2000, now with bubs its all about her and I'm seriously listening to my mum and doing no pressies for the adults in my family - so that will leave just bubs to buy for. Why don't you just pretend that you brought pressies for each other, I'd be tempted to say that you spent the $200 on something that was way to big to fit in the car to take with you! |
Posted By: IVFGirl1111
Date Posted: 23 October 2009 at 9:31am
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Im confused.
So they do a secret santa and the price is $100PP and since you cant afford the $100pp (which would be $200 since your buying for 2 people) then they have just pulled you out of the secret santa? Is that correct? ------------- TTC 6 years IVF it is IVF/ICSI round one 10 eggs, 8 mature, 3 fertilised BFN IVF/ICSI #2 = 22 eggs! 20 mature, 15 fertilised, 1 fresh transfer and 2 frosties BFN 2 Frosties still in freezer thank god |
Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 23 October 2009 at 9:43am
| Man thats rough. But then DH's family are the same, well not their family, I think DH is. He feels this need to spend far too much money on presents because thats what his family do. Its like dude they aren't a one income family and BIL lives by himself. *sigh* its an ongoing battle with that one! I'd tell your family to stop being so greedy |