Out of interest earning power you versus
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Topic: Out of interest earning power you versus
Posted By: nictoddie
Subject: Out of interest earning power you versus
Date Posted: 08 November 2009 at 8:59pm
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Just wondering what you would do , if you could earn alot more than your partner would you swap roles??? I can earn prob a good amount more than my dh and have just applied for a job if I get it then we will be swapping roles, a bit torn but think we would be way better off money wise, and the job I would still get to have plenty of time with the kids so thought if it all goes to plan we will give it a go... would you ??? ------------- 
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Replies:
Posted By: nictoddie
Date Posted: 08 November 2009 at 9:31pm
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17 views no replies guess no one has an opinion ??? -------------
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Posted By: AandCsmum
Date Posted: 08 November 2009 at 9:35pm
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Yes probably......PROVIDING.....he didn't just drop everything once I got home & then I had to do it. Fine once a week, like when I ask him to cook tea. ------------- Kel http://lilypie.com"> 
A = 01.02.04 & C = 16.01.09 & G = 30.03.12 |
Posted By: noisybaby
Date Posted: 08 November 2009 at 9:40pm
| We would. At worst give it a go and if it doesnt suit both of you after a certain time period, swap. You'll never know unless you try |
Posted By: scribe
Date Posted: 08 November 2009 at 9:41pm
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I do!! I would LOVE to be able to swap roles with my DH - and he 'says' he would too - especially as currently he doesn't like his job and I loved what I did ... but for us that is just not an option, as his salary is three times my previous salary - we just couldn't survive on my income alone.
I think it depends on your DH - mine would be great as a SAHD, and he's not the kind of man to have a problem with not being the main breadwinner. Having said that, I suppose the same things that bother me about being a SAHM could come to bother him in time too - and I think I might get a bit jealous of his time with DD... Mmm, actually I think in a perfect world we would both work part-time! |
Posted By: Andriea
Date Posted: 08 November 2009 at 9:42pm
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Yep we would and will prob do so in about a year. (it takes me at least a year to be able to leave our baby's, lol) Only my DH will get a part time job (12ish hours a week) so he can get out of the house and spend time with adults and the kids will go to daycare for some socialisation with other children. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 08 November 2009 at 9:51pm
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yep, I would, but there's no way that would happen, so I'll never have to walk the talk so to speak! good luck! ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: emz
Date Posted: 08 November 2009 at 11:33pm
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No. DH couldn't be a SAHD I don't think, he'd go nuts.
I grew up with this scenario too, and while it caused some arguments (more because Dad felt so bad that he couldn't work due to an accident, so mum had to pull mega hours to earn more money) it was great for us kids. But... things weren't done as a mother would do them.. dishes, housework, dinner etc. Dad looked after us and worked a bit from home, but that was it. Mum had to do the rest once she got home. |
Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 7:30am
| Yes but I'd set down some ground rules. ie that everything I do now gets done by him. and I'm not expected to pick up the slack on the weekend |
Posted By: flakesitchyfeet
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 8:13am
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Absolutely! I have an amazing husband who is wonderful in the kitchen. I do love being at home, but I have no doubt my kids would get what they need from their Dad, and if it brought in the money so be it!
In saying that, the potential is there for me to earn more but his current job gives us a lifestyle that we couldn't get with either of us working elsewhere, so we haven't looked into it. -------------  http://lilypie.com"> |
Posted By: ElfsMum
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 8:16am
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my Dh would be brilliant..and would prob do everything while i was at work but i wouldn't leave E and the new baby full time..i would like to share roles but we cant really do that.. so yeah i would do it i guess but would prefer not to leave them full time.. but you still get heaps of time so sounds great?
i find it bizarre people would swap roles and not do the housework etc? my Dh is way better at that stuff than me:) ------------- Mum to two amazing boys! |
Posted By: FreeSpirit
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 8:35am
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I wouldn't - my earning potential is much, much more then what DP earns, but there is no way he'd be a good SAHD (I love him and he's great with our daughter but even he admits that he couldn't be a primary caregiver). He needs to work - a bit old fashioned but he feels it's his job in the family to be the bread winner, and I wouldn't want to leave him feeling immasculated (sp). ------------- http://www.babysfirstsite.com"> 
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Posted By: lilfatty
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 8:36am
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We already have!
I earned about 4 times what DH did so when we got pg it was a mutual decision that I go back to work and he would be the SAHD. Even though he is a student now, he will still be the primary care giver of both our children from next month when I return to work . DH "cooks" for Isabelle .. but I cook my own meals (and usually his if he wants a proper meal), im just better at cooking than him lol .. its no biggie, when he is in his SAHD role, he does housework, washing etc ------------- Mummy to Issy (3) and Elias (18 months) I did it .. 41 kgs gone! From flab to fab in under a year  http://www.femininefitness.co.nz/category/blog - LFs weight blog
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Posted By: minik8e
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 8:36am
| I earned more than DH (and had the potential for even more), but will be staying home. The original plan was exactly that - DH to be a SAHD and I would work, but he realises now that it's not as easy as he thought, and he wouldn't be able to do it without going insane or getting very very frustrated. I can also imagine that I would get home from work and have to do all the housework, especially the laundry. |
Posted By: Babe
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 8:40am
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Nope definitely no role-swapping here. I love being at home and DP would go mental. He can barely get through a weekend if he doesn't have heaps to keep him busy. I'd hate going out to work too.
Even if I could earn more than him, which is possible but not hugely likely, then we wouldn't do it. In saying that he would be a great SAHD both with the kids and running the house. -------------   
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Posted By: lemongirl
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 9:04am
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DP earns way too much for this to even be feasible which is a shame in many ways.
I was one of the first generation of kids to have a SAHD for large tracts of my childhood and I think I really benefited from it. Yes things weren't exactly as my mother would do them but who the hell cares as long as it is done. |
Posted By: Twinboys2b
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 9:18am
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Yes absolutely, we always discussed that I'd take the first year off and he'd do the second year (this was when we were earning the same amount) which I know he would love to do but he just earns so much more now than that it's not feasible unfortunately. I wouldn't have had a problem as DH does all the cooking anyway and loves a clean house so he'd probably enjoy doing the housework more than I do.
I'm a bit biased though as I'm all for shared care and don't believe in those old fashioned ways of life i.e. a 'mans' role & 'womens' role. ------------- 3yr old gorgeous ID twin boys. |
Posted By: clover
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 9:45am
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Potentially I can earn more than my DH but when we do have children I will stay at home. If money was an issue then I would go back to work but so long as we can comfortable exist on what he is earning he will be the breadwinner. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Febgirl
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 10:30am
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When I'm working full time I earn more than DH, not a sginificant amount though, around $10k. I'm able to work part time in my position though and my work is more flexible than DH's so it makes sense for me to work part time and DH fulltime - he would struggle in his job working part time and would probably end up doing just as many hours as he does now but be paid less!
In saying that though I think DH would like to work part time (if there wasn't the pressure to do a full time workload) but I'd bet you anything his mum would end up coming over most days to look after DD and DH and do the housework!  ------------- Two little girls under 2! 
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Posted By: lilfatty
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 10:58am
I wouldnt care if DH cheated and had his Mum come to do it .. as long as its clean 
In all fairness .. I think DH is much better at the SAH role than I am .. (well not the logistics, a woman always gets more done), but he is extremely active and is always taking the kids out, I tend to like routine more and so the kids only go out on their activity days and we do more stuff around the house. ------------- Mummy to Issy (3) and Elias (18 months) I did it .. 41 kgs gone! From flab to fab in under a year http://www.femininefitness.co.nz/category/blog - LFs weight blog
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 11:07am
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I'd do it in a heart beat, financial security is fairly important to me I enjoy going out to work and DH would be great at home, this may happen in the future when I've completed my degree and DH has done his time with the Airforce. DH is much better at doing housework than me.
------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">   [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: Treen
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 12:26pm
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I would! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: ohanlon82
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 12:33pm
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Yip i totally would.. If it meant we would be better off.. and i have full faith in DH
DH earns alot more for me so we always said the person that earns the most will go to work.. YAY for DH  ------------- http://lb2f.lilypie.com/TikiPic.php/RPaODBg.jpg |
Posted By: jazzy
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 1:46pm
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If that's what you want go for it.
I would not as my DH has spent years doing & upgrading his qualifications while working, so in a few years all that hard work will pay off. Besides don't think he would get mush else done & he is not the best when the kids are sick so I would end up taking time off work for that as I did in the past. If I was to get a job, then the kids would have to go to daycare/after school care, & I would only go back to work for more money before my youngest is at school. |
Posted By: MrsMojo
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 2:19pm
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For me it depends on what you mean by "a lot more". My salary is over $10k higher than DH's but material things are a lot less important to me than time with my kids. This means we've had to tighten our belts signifcantly because we're currently earning less than 1/2 what we're used to but it's good practice for us. DH was an excellent sahd to our dd (he even coped beautifully working fulltime while still being the main caregiver, he just skipped sleeping) so his ability to be the nurturer and house keeper didn't come into the equation, when i do go back to work part time next July i have no qualms leaving him with the kids. Quite basically it broke my heart to leave my dd as a baby and go back to work fulltime and we agreed it wouldn't happen again. Additionally while i currently earn more DH has higher earning potential. He's going places whereas my job isn't, there's nowhere to move to and i already earn 120% of the mean salary for my role (of course i'm worth every penny plus some So someone would need to offer me a heck of a lot of cash before we'd consider switching roles but i'm happy to job share with DH and that's the longterm plan. -------------  
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Posted By: nictoddie
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 5:28pm
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Thanks so much for your replies good to hear of those that are doing it and it is working, It's not so much material things but just getting by in life, Dh has no quals and works in the cleaning industry so we just get by , I have management exp in retail and other areas and earning potential is alot more than cleaners wages, the position I have applied for is and op managers job and hours of work are 3am to midday so will still get plenty of time with the kids and dh could easily get a part time night job if need be for his own sanity will see if I get it and go from there And I think he would be great he really only has mr 10 months to look after and the school and kindy drop offs as I would be home for pick ups -------------
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Posted By: MrsMojo
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 6:15pm
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Nic my DH and i both worked and stilll managed to keep DD out of care. My hours were 7:30am-3:30pm and DH worked 4pm - 10pm. He looked after DD during the day then passed her to me on the way to work and i took her home. We barely saw each other but it worked really well. -------------
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Posted By: nictoddie
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 6:18pm
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Thanks mrs mojo -------------
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Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 09 November 2009 at 6:40pm
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I would. But in my job, i can bascially flit in and out and i know there will (nearly always) be a position for me. For Dh, leaving work would mean he may struggle to another position later on.
So while I earn about...$10K more, it would be easier for me to take time off than him. In saying that, DH would be a fab SAHM. the kids would get so much attention and adore it....the dishes and washing, perhaps NOT so much attention however! |
Posted By: HoneybunsMa
Date Posted: 10 November 2009 at 3:39pm
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DP made noises about staying at home when we first found out we were preggers. He earns too much for it to be viable, BUT he would be useless at being a sahd he gets bored far too easily and gets grumpy when he doesn't get his way, PLUS he isn't patient enough and growls her off for crying because she is hungry. ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
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Posted By: kiwisj
Date Posted: 10 November 2009 at 3:59pm
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My DH reckons he would do it in a hearbeat and I would love for it to be an option for us. Unfortunately here it is not (I can't work full time here without jumping through lots of hoops and would get sh*te pay), but it would be a possibility back home. However my DH earns WAY more than I ever will so it would be quite a lifestyle change for us all - one I am quite prepared to try, but DH not so much apparently.
If it will work for you guys I would go for it!! Specially if your DH is keen to do a good job of being the SAHP  ------------- SJ Callum - Dec 2008 Daniel - Oct 2010 |
Posted By: kellie
Date Posted: 10 November 2009 at 4:03pm
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Well hubby has been on ACC for over a year due to a very serious accident. He works as a skipper on a fishing boat so would be away alot. At the moment I have been working part time and he really seems to enjoy the SAHD lifestyle. I would love to go back to work full time as I probally would earn more than him..and that way he won't be away. ------------- 
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Posted By: JAFAjaffa
Date Posted: 11 November 2009 at 9:20pm
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I'm taking the first 6 months with the baby, then my husband is taking the second 6 months. I think we'll have to do daycare after that, but I earn a pile more than DH so it just makes a lot more sense to do it that way.
And he'll be doing the housework as well as looking after the baby if that's what I do when I am at home! There's no way I am going to do everything when I am at home, and continue doing everything when I am working too!! At the moment we split the chores and take turns cooking. There'll still be some degree of that when the baby comes. I'd love to stay at home for a year, but financially, we just can't do it. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: crakars
Date Posted: 12 November 2009 at 7:49pm
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I have just gone back to work and DH is staying at home - he is doing a far better job than me - so it works perfectly for us - also i get all the school holidays off so its the best of both worlds.
lewis loves being home with his dad and they do more stuff together than i ever did - well worth it -------------  http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: pomikiwi
Date Posted: 12 November 2009 at 8:09pm
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I would swap if I could earn what DH does. I would want to be home for at least the 1st year for BF, after that bubs could have just morning night BF.
DH would totally love to. What a shame it'll never happen, lol! ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
DD-Carys Amelia 17.03.06 |