Stuff nobody told you about giving birth
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: General Chat
Forum Name: General Chat
Forum Description: For mums, dads, parents-to-be, grandparents, friends -- you name it! And you name the topic you want to chat about!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=31023
Printed Date: 10 November 2025 at 2:02pm
Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 12.05 - http://www.webwizforums.com
Topic: Stuff nobody told you about giving birth
Posted By: Katherine
Subject: Stuff nobody told you about giving birth
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 3:17pm
|
What surprised/shocked/amazed/embarrassed you about being in labour and giving birth? And the early days of motherhood as well... I'd love to hear your stories. Nobody told me that the minute my daughter was out, the pain simply evaporated, as if by magic. Nobody told me I'd be so ravenous following her birth that I demolished toast, tea, dinner, dessert, an entire box of chocolate macadamias, and several glasses of water, all in one "meal" that lasted for about an hour! Nobody told me that babies aren't really that cute when they first come out, and that they may have coneheads, especially if you stopped pushing while they were crowning. My kid wore a hat for three days until her head evened out, because I didn't want anybody to see it. |
Replies:
Posted By: lisa85
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 3:23pm
|
Nobody told me that you still bleed downstairs for about a week with a c/section.
Nobody told me that when you have to sleep in the same room as your baby/s in hospital, how much NOISE they make at night. Not just crying but constant gurgles and squeaks all night long that make it impossible to sleep! Nobody told me how you can actually seem to thrive off no sleep at all in those first few weeks. You actually have much more energy than you could ever imagine! -------------  
TTC #3 since Jan 2010 - PCOS MC April 2010 |
Posted By: lilfatty
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 3:25pm
How much it hurts! I mean REALLY hurts .. beyond all comprehension hurts. 
That they arent robots that automatically work on the three hourly cycle like the books say. That most of them dont like to sleep anywhere other than on Mummy. That you will have this little being attached to your breast pretty much 24 hours a day and your ass will go numb from sitting down feeding so much. Your highlight of the day will be if you get to have a shower. You will eat with one hand (or not eat at all) for months because the other arm has a baby in it. You will love like them so much it hurts and you know every second and every extra kilo was worth it. ------------- Mummy to Issy (3) and Elias (18 months) I did it .. 41 kgs gone! From flab to fab in under a year  http://www.femininefitness.co.nz/category/blog - LFs weight blog
|
Posted By: Katherine
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 3:34pm
|
Ha! SO TRUE! Also, nobody ever told me that just because I have massive boobs doesn't mean breastfeeding will be easy. It took ages to "get it right", and I had to feed in some pretty awkward positions to ensure that my giant breasts didn't flop down and smother my feeding child. Seriously, they were bigger than her head for a while! Along the same lines, nobody ever told me that trying to express breast milk might not work for me. I could have saved myself some serious dosh (as I bought a posh hospital-grade pump) and stress if I had realised that pumping just doesn't happen for some people. |
lilfatty wrote:Posted By: kellie
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 3:38pm
|
That you might as well leave your modesty at the door when you arrive at the hospital ------------- 
|
Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 3:41pm
i'm pretty sure we have this thread already!?  ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
|
Posted By: myfullhouse
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 3:45pm
|
Gosh I agree with all of those.
Nobody told me that some oe the pain experienced was a burning pain! Nobody told me that you could be sitting in gosh knows what muck after giving birth and that you wouldn't even notice much less care since you had a beautiful baby in your arms Nobody told me the different experieince you could have 2nd time round with a different mw even when both were great Nobody told me that I would actually be able to think coherantly (sp??) and even give DH directions to the hospital (following the side streets) while in labour and most likely about 8cms! ------------- Lindsey 
|
Posted By: weegee
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 3:46pm
|
Bizzy's right, I just bumped two similar threads, one's 6 pages long
Here are the links: http://www.ohbaby.co.nz/Forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=15630&PN=1&TPN=1 - http://www.ohbaby.co.nz/Forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=15630&PN=1&TPN=1 http://www.ohbaby.co.nz/Forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=27370&PN=1&TPN=1 - http://www.ohbaby.co.nz/Forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=27370&PN=1&TPN=1 FWIW my thing is - nobody told me that my hair wasn't falling out like normal when I was pregnant, so it's normal for it to start falling out in massive clumps after a few weeks! ------------- 
Mum to JJ, 4 July 2008 & Addie, 28 July 2010 |
Posted By: Katherine
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 4:05pm
|
Let's see if the new mums will come in and post their experiences here -- I'd love some fresh perspectives too! :) |
Posted By: AandCsmum
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 4:09pm
No one told me that giving birth was like going for the mother of all dumps  I thought it was going to so much further forward IYKWIM------------- Kel http://lilypie.com"> 
A = 01.02.04 & C = 16.01.09 & G = 30.03.12 |
Posted By: boys.boys.boys.boys
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 4:30pm
|
I so agree with everything!!!
Nobody told me that it is quite normal to tear with a normal birth and need stitches, oh my what a shock!!! (I thought they only came if you had to have a episotomy!!) Nobody told me what you are meant to wear during labour... for that matter, i still dont know!!! Nobody told me how hard it is to get those lovely little eyes to close and go to sleep at night.... And nobody told me how hard it was to put my babies to sleep in their beds cos then I couldnt see them for a hour or so!!! ------------- 4 boys!! 7 years, 5 years, 2 years and 8 weeks... |
Posted By: Chickoin
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 4:35pm
|
New babies smell funny.
I didn't know just how hard a newborn can suck ur poor nipple not long after being born, that was really scary! -------------   
|
Posted By: SquishysMum
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 4:50pm
| How much your ARMS can hurt! Seriously, I expected everything else to hurt, but arms? |
Posted By: MummyFreckle
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 6:01pm
|
That having 9 people in the room with your fanny exposed was such a non-issue compared to my childs dropping heart rate....
|
Posted By: MrsH
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 8:11pm
|
No one told me that the new Granddads (who were waiting in the Whanau room) we're coming in to see their new grandson WHILE I'M BEING STITCHED UP!!!
(I'll never forgive my clueless sister for that.... and I can't look my father-in-law in the eye anymore) No one told me that I'd temporarily forget what all the hard work was for once he was out and that once I heard him cry, I turned into a completely different person. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
|
Posted By: Rachael21
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 8:14pm
| Haha love your ticker weegee thats awesome |
Posted By: Lexidore
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 8:46pm
|
Nobody told me that although I worried about "pooing" while I gave birth the whole way through my pregnancy when I did I wouldn't actually care!
Nobody told me that an epidural site could be bruised so bad that I would have agonising shooting pains in my back for days afterwards. Nobody told me that 2-3 weeks after I gave birth I could still end up blocked up and scared to go poo even though the first time I went was fine! Nobody told me my little girl could pee on me during nappy changes I thought only boys did this haha! Nobody told me that the bath could actually make my contractions worse! Although people told me how much the first time I saw my baby would mean to me you still dont know how much it will mean till it happens!! ------------- 
|
Posted By: Chickaboo
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 9:22pm
|
nobody told me you can have pethadine more than once during labor instead of trying to hold out till it got totally unbearable
nobody told me forget the projectile vomit or wee's they an also quirt poo's over you  ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
876 |
Posted By: RoSee
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 11:10pm
Nobody told me it actually does keep hurting for some time after you've given birth (the pain didn't magically disappear for me!!) 
Nobody told me that once the baby was here I would spend 97% of each and every day worrying about something! Nobody told me that the love you have for your child is so incredibly strong it can be physically painful  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
 September '11
|
Posted By: Rowsieair
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 11:19pm
|
So true! I dreaded the thought of that many people having access to bits I never intended them to...by half way through labour I couldn't have cared less how many people were there! Nobody told me my hair would be falling out afterwards for a while... Nobody told me not only did the epidural numb you around the middle but also all down your legs aswell....for a while afterwards! Nobody told me babies have weird things like dry skin and gooey eyes and all sorts of little things like that...they're always clean, smooth and perfect when you see other peoples...!
------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
|
Posted By: Tastic
Date Posted: 18 January 2010 at 11:23pm
|
no one told me you can go from no baby to baby in 3 1/2 hours
noone told me you can vomit from being in shock when in labour noone told me when in premature labour as soon as you are fully dilated and ready to push 20 people would appear from no where noone told me you wouldn't give a stuff who saw down there when your having a baby lol (I had to get told to put pants on to go to the hospital lol) noone told me that having a fullterm baby and a preemie baby who was aided out with a males hand would both hurt about the same! |
Posted By: monkey33
Date Posted: 19 January 2010 at 9:11pm
|
No-one warned me about the bleeding downstairs after csection either Lisa! 2 weeks later and still going!
No-one warned me about postpartum sweating! I woke up some nights absolutely drenched!  ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
|
Posted By: babyg
Date Posted: 19 January 2010 at 9:58pm
YAY!! Good news Tastic - thats what I wanted to hear!! Do you think Aidan hurt the same just cos thats the way it always would've been or mostly cos of the extra hand in the way?? ------------- Ev, Mum to: Carys Ruby - 4 October 2007 Spencer James - 2 July 2010 |
Posted By: catisla
Date Posted: 19 January 2010 at 10:00pm
|
I was not expecting the placenta to be so big! I was more interested in that than the baby for a little while
Oh - and i was not prepared for how difficult pushing can be ------------- |
Posted By: LittleBug
Date Posted: 19 January 2010 at 10:36pm
|
No one told me how scary it would be to go to the toilet after giving birth
No one told me that you weren't supposed to go off into this grey fairyland when you are given entonox (until I stopped breathing, LOL). No one told me that I wouldn't care at the time that I met my anaesthetist with no pants on, and that I wouldn't even care about throwing up all over myself while I was under an epi. No one told me that I would be too tired to even breathe without being reminded, after a few hours of pushing. No one told me how much power-chucking and projectile poo to expect. No one told me that I would get horrendous cankles after birth. No one told me that I could have trouble breastfeeding despite having milk for Africa. ------------- Chloe (4 years) and Oliver (3 years). |
Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 19 January 2010 at 11:04pm
|
I had a feeling it would be a tad painful , the pain exceeded my expectations.
I didn't know you could love and hate someone at the same time (whilst in labour) I didn't know that , despite people saying "oh when the baby is born the pain just goes away "they are talking crap , and it isn't always the case ,and you may be walking round like you have a pineapple shoved up your a** for weeks to come I didn't know that you CAN feel half dead and still get up al through the night I didnt know youu could fall in love straight away I didnt know you could do it twice ------------- 
|
Posted By: AandCsmum
Date Posted: 19 January 2010 at 11:14pm
|
I didn't realise how quickly you can forget most of the stuff posted above.... ------------- Kel http://lilypie.com">
A = 01.02.04 & C = 16.01.09 & G = 30.03.12 |
Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 20 January 2010 at 12:25am
|
Ha , I still remember eight years later, I just thought perhaps it would be different with Ty .
But so I definetly don't forget next time , i've written it down , to remind me what im in for -------------
|
Posted By: MamaT
Date Posted: 21 January 2010 at 9:38am
|
No one told me that people would be commenting on what my body looks like after giving birth and for the weeks following
No one told me how hard it is not to push when you get that urge.
No one told me how hard you can shake during labour
No one told me that when you have an epidural MW's would be changing your pads for the next few hours
No one told me about the weird feeling you'd get after getting up and out of bed for the first time
No one told me how much you can miss and love your baby after only just meeting him -------------  
|
Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 21 January 2010 at 10:55am
|
As someone who is yet to go through this experience, it seems to me you don't get told much at all and its nothing like the movies or tv. |
Posted By: LJsmum
Date Posted: 21 January 2010 at 12:23pm
|
good thread
no one told me about after pains! happen after 2nd or more babies. no one told me about the huge swollen ankles and feet after birth. So massive that;s the first ting people noticed when they visited! no one told me you can still function and feed a baby on no sleep! -------------  
|
Posted By: M2K
Date Posted: 21 January 2010 at 12:57pm
|
No one told me how painful breast feeding can be, and how its so easy to want to give up in the first month (we got over that hurdle but now she has teeth haha)
No one told me I would still have massive contraction-like pains after giving birth, waiting for placenta to "fall out" which took almost half an hour No one told me placenta was so disgusting looking haha (or I didn't want to know more like it) No one told me I would hardly sleep, not because of baby crying, but because I couldn't stop staring at her, and she still fascinates me No one told me the closest I have ever felt to my partner was while he was holding me, encouraging me while giving birth, but took me a long time to be 'close' with him again afterwards! No one told me I would have an epi for surgery after naturally pushing out a 10pound 11 girl whose arm came out beside her head, superwoman styles, and pretty much tore me a new one!!! Nope, I didn't see that one coming!! ------------- 
|
Posted By: LittleBug
Date Posted: 21 January 2010 at 1:02pm
Oooo yeah... I didn't know about that either! Gosh I felt like I was still in labour at times. ------------- Chloe (4 years) and Oliver (3 years). |
Posted By: SMoody
Date Posted: 21 January 2010 at 2:03pm
|
I pretty much knew as much as I could with antenatal classes we took as a couple. They were great and covered almost everything.
However: I had the c-section instead of natural first time around and when I got to see McKayla she was all clean (still with a bit of vernix) but most of it was rubbed off ect on Grants shirt. No one really told me how blue a baby can be when they come out and how full of blood they can actually be(talking about Andrew). I kept on thinking is he okay is he okay why is he so blue. Although his score was 8 and then 10. He just seemed to be really blue and it freaked me out. And no one told me the damn stitching up job will be so sore or that you can bleed almost more than a c-section. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
|
Posted By: WestiesGirl
Date Posted: 21 January 2010 at 4:38pm
|
No one told me how fast labour can actually happen.
No one told me about the painful contraction feelings I had the day after. No one told me that babies sleep for ages when they are brand new/just born. No one told me that there was no pain in between contactions. No one told me how weird I would be feeling after giving birth, both physically and emotionally ------------- Our Angel July 08 Gone but not forgotten
And to complete our family, our princess has arrived 
|
Posted By: Hopes
Date Posted: 21 January 2010 at 4:45pm
Ooh, how interesting. I hadn't given it much thought, but I hadn't imagined the 'between' bits as painless either... the things you learn -------------   
|
Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 21 January 2010 at 5:36pm
|
I found it one big pain for most of it -------------
|
Posted By: Shelt
Date Posted: 22 January 2010 at 11:54am
|
No one told me how scary it can be when a bunch of people show up in the delivery suite and your midwife tells you to hurry up and get the baby out RIGHT NOW (coz she was going into distress).
Or how I wouldn't even remember what she looked like the first time I held her because the paed told me I could only have 5 seconds before they took her away to special care and I was frightened. Or how heart wrenching it can be to be transferred to the maternity ward without your baby and everyone around you (including your room mate) asks where yours is. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
|
Posted By: MummyFreckle
Date Posted: 22 January 2010 at 5:14pm
|
Glad I am not the only one that have HUGE cankles....I was so scared when it happened (it seemed to be really sudden) that I got all panic-ky and made my DH call the midwife....
|
Posted By: _Deb_
Date Posted: 22 January 2010 at 5:25pm
|
LOL i got cankles too. From being hooked up to the drip for so long. It was hideous! ------------- 
|
Posted By: mummyofprinces
Date Posted: 22 January 2010 at 9:07pm
|
No one told me my contractions would start within minutes of my waters being broken and that with an induction its all in... bang contractions you cant talk through.
-------------   
|
Posted By: BeLoved
Date Posted: 22 January 2010 at 10:05pm
|
No one told me that epidurals sometimes don't work AT ALL!
No one told me that being induced does not necessarily mean it will be slow and instead it can go so quickly there is no break between contractions
No one told me how much more you will love your husband/partner after your baby is born No one told me that keeping your eyes closed does not stop the pain but somehow makes things easier to deal with (well for me anyway) Everyone told me but I never believed that you do actually forget how painful it was and really cannot wait to do it again. I actually drove past the hospital the other day and felt envious of all the woman who may have been in labour????? |
Posted By: shadowfeet
Date Posted: 22 January 2010 at 10:19pm
|
No one had told me that I wouldn't actually want to have my baby on my chest for skin to skin (was too nauseous and somehow chlostrophobic), and then how much it hurt to leave her in neonates and then how relieved I was to not have to look after her in my room. Noone told me (not that they could have predicted) how sick I would get after the birth. ------------- 
|
Posted By: shadowfeet
Date Posted: 22 January 2010 at 10:30pm
|
This one as well, Mine worked a little and mine ended up as a c-section. I was having shooting nerve pains the whole way through and crying the whole time. -------------
|
Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 22 January 2010 at 11:14pm
|
Im ignoring the comment about epidurals not working ....
as long as I don't have the same result my friend had , then im happy tho -------------
|
Posted By: wellygirl
Date Posted: 23 January 2010 at 8:50am
|
No one told me I might get sent away from the hospital for not being dilated enough (even though contractions were 3mins apart and had been going for 12 hours!).
No one told me my DH would hog the gas
No one told me about the catheter afterwards
No one told me that I might not feel immediately bonded, but the love would just keep growing and growing over time. |
Posted By: fire_engine
Date Posted: 23 January 2010 at 8:57am
|
No one told me an induction could take four days and that everyday the hospital MW would come into the room and say "well, we might send you home for a few days". No you bloody well won't, not when I'm 42 weeks pregnant and my placenta is starting to look old on the scans.
No one told me how horrible it would be to not be able to hold my baby cos I was fainting, or how awful it was to hear him cry in his bassinet but not be able to move and pick him up or change his nappy cos of my hemorrhage Still gets me really upset.------------- Mum to two wee boys |
Posted By: jano1
Date Posted: 23 January 2010 at 10:50am
| Snap on the epidurals not working (my fault apparently as I didn't top it up- maybe they should have told me I could) and on inductions not really working |
Posted By: MrsH
Date Posted: 23 January 2010 at 9:48pm
Snap!! Me too - It was like we were the only two in the room (and not the 12 there actually were). The most intimate I have ever felt with him - sounds strange I know. No one told me that I should be resting up in my last few weeks.... would've been helpful to know and I might not have had to be induced due to pre-eclampsia. And on that, no one told me that once my waters were broken, the contractions would come with a vengence. No one told me that baby would want to feed constantly for the first few days. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
|