Boys!
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Category: General Chat
Forum Name: General Chat
Forum Description: For mums, dads, parents-to-be, grandparents, friends -- you name it! And you name the topic you want to chat about!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=31222
Printed Date: 20 December 2025 at 8:50am
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Topic: Boys!
Posted By: KiwiL
Subject: Boys!
Date Posted: 28 January 2010 at 4:08pm
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So, I went to pick Jackson up from Day Care today and the first thing the carer said to me was "You know, the way Jackson runs is actually quite dangerous."
What am I supposed to do about that?!?! Jackson has had waaaay too much energy since he was born. He NEVER sits still. Even when he was tiny his arms and legs were constantly flapping. Other mums comment time and time again that they get tired just watching him. He's always moved way more than any other baby I know and when I see him in a big group, he's the one running around. All the other babies can walk carefully, Jackson doesn't understand careful. He skipped walking, and went straight to running, and he is still very unstable because of it. He couldn't even stand still in one spot until just recently. He tears around everywhere and is constantly falling over, crashing into things, having near misses. He's had about 8 facial injuries in the last 3 weeks, the latest today. Two of them needed glue at hospital. Two more have involved blood and one was a big black eye. Another was a bruise that went from his forehead to his chin. He's bruised and scraped up and down both legs. He actually looks like a victim of foul play, and sometimes I wonder if that's what people think!! Has anyone else had any SUPER energetic, out of control, danger-seeking babies, and did they eventually learn to be careful and slow down? I am actually concerned he's going to take an eye out or something. It's just slightly worrying the life out of me!! I don't really want to spend Jackson's childhood at the hospital. 
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Replies:
Posted By: RinTinTin
Date Posted: 28 January 2010 at 4:43pm
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Awww, I can see why you're worried. Kind of got me worried too as Mac is only 7 weeks old and unless he's asleep then he isn't still. LOL Can you perhaps try to start playing some games with him where the object of the game is to move slowly? Refine his fine motor skills. I think with boys getting them into a game that might be considered "slow and boring" could be hard but if you make it competitive, they may show more interest. Perhaps insist that he has to play a slow quiet game before he's allowed to play a fast loud game, then he might see that being slow and steady can get him something he wants. Sorry, that kind of just turned into babble. But what I'm saying is, encourage him to do "slow and steady" stuff then rewarding him with the faster paced stuff. Also, can you get him to walk a bit slower at home if you're holding his hands? I figure if you're holding him he can't take off. Just to bring in the idea of moving slower and again building on his fine motor skills so he doesn't always fall over, etc. Maybe introduce the idea of inside and outside behaviour. Walking inside, running is for outside. When he hurts himself, do you explain to him that the injury could have been avoided if he'd just been a bit slower and more careful? I know he's only 16 or so months old but he may start understanding the concept. Sorry, these are just ideas that are popping into my head and I'm just firing them out there. I've done a bit of study of child development and behaviour so trying to think along those lines. If he's never shown the advantages to "slow and steady" then he'll always go for the faster option. Don't know if thats any help what-so-ever.  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: T_Rex
Date Posted: 28 January 2010 at 5:23pm
My brother was like that. Supercharged all of the time. All of the hospital x-ray staff knew his name 
He grew out of it at puberty i guess? Sorry!! ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: KiwiL
Date Posted: 28 January 2010 at 5:46pm
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Oh god. 56 views and two replies....
Some great ideas Mum2Mac. I guess we have to start being more consistent. He's definately better at gross motor skills than fine. But he seems amped by nature, so I dunno how we'll slow him down. All the possible injuries worry me constantly. But mostly I am concerned he will lose an eye or a tooth. T_Rex.... what can I say....
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Posted By: KiwiL
Date Posted: 28 January 2010 at 5:48pm
| And is this a sign of ADHD? I know they can't even begin to try to diagnose till much older, and that doesn't worry me, but just wondering..... |
Posted By: SMoody
Date Posted: 28 January 2010 at 6:09pm
No no no no. Sorry but he is way way too young to start "labeling". I think it is generally an age thing and perhaps even a boy thing. My girl on the other hand has always been very fast. Never did that waddly walking thing. One day she gave 3 steps and I am not lieing the next day she was running. Luckily she just got better at it and never really got hurt. We did use a harness while out so she doesnt just run in traffic and it stopped her from face planting with the pavement. Saying "be careful" doesnt mean anything to a child. Rather say go slower. Lets practice mouse walking and then go tippy toe tippy toe ect. Or when he is climbing rather say remember to hold on tight with your hands ect. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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kiwilaurie wrote:Posted By: KiwiL
Date Posted: 28 January 2010 at 6:14pm
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Yeah, I almost didn't want to ask... not labelling, just genuine curiosity because his behaviour has always been so extreme!
Good point about "be careful" - I do find myself yelping that from time to time! Am trying to say walk slowly to him lots. As for holding hands, no chance!! |
Posted By: AandCsmum
Date Posted: 28 January 2010 at 6:40pm
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Boys says it all...mine has just been racing me to the power socket...I've removed him 10 times! now he's going for the back door.
My brother was crazy & didn't slow down until he could get into active sports. Grin & bear it along with the rest of us ------------- Kel http://lilypie.com"> 
A = 01.02.04 & C = 16.01.09 & G = 30.03.12 |
Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 28 January 2010 at 7:17pm
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what a dumb arse thing for the carer to say! ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
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Posted By: peanut butter
Date Posted: 28 January 2010 at 7:39pm
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one thing I read somewhere was not to say things like "be careful, you'll fall" etc as often that is exactly what happens. They are cruising along nicely and suddenly you put the thought of falling into their heads and bang, thats what happens.
Instead you are meant to try and tell them what TO do...eg, hold on tight, walk slowly, remember to hol don with your hands etc. I have to do this with Tom when he decides he can climb ANY ladder on the playground...and he can. I end up standing there reminding him "step up, reach up, step up, reach up...thats good, hold on, well done "...sh*t its tiring! |
Posted By: RinTinTin
Date Posted: 28 January 2010 at 8:48pm
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I wonder if a product like Rescue Remedy might help to calm him a bit? No, I don't think it's a sign of ADHD, and personally I've never really believed that ADHD exists. Usually it's teachers that stick that label on kids when the problem is that the teacher can only teach in one way and the child requires a different kind of teaching IYKWIM. You may find Jackson may not be so academically focused but instead be far more of a sportsman and/or prefer to learn by doing rather than sitting and reading. Just a heads up for the future anyway. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Caro07
Date Posted: 28 January 2010 at 8:57pm
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My wee man is also a bundle of energy though we haven't ended up in hospital ... yet! I think it is probably more luck than anything!!! He has got better as he has got older and he does listen and respond 99% of the time when I say 'slowly' or something along those lines. He will also now hold my hand but has only done that for a few months.
Before that it was really stressful cos you can't avoid particular situations because every situation is exciting and a game for him. I understand where you are coming from and for us persistence (reinforcing 'slowly' etc) and, probably most of all, time.  As much as possible I try to be really relaxed and encourage him to pick himself up without fretting too much - that has taken practice!
Mainly a boy thing I think, though I have come across a few girls who are similar too. ------------- Caroline, SAHM to 2 boys, S (4 years old) and J (2 years old) 
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Posted By: emz
Date Posted: 28 January 2010 at 9:06pm
Maybe it's a 'Jackson' thing  We've had comments by complete strangers about 'boy you must have your hands full with that one', 'he's a real character' and 'gosh he's quick and cunning'.
One thing we've implemented is inside and outside rules. So inside has walking and quiet voices, outside has running and yelling (if need be). He's just starting to get the hang of it (although still bangs into doorframes and falls over constantly!) I really think it is just boys. Every single person I know that has a boy has had to take them to the hospital or after hours because of their boisterous behaviour. |
Posted By: mummyofprinces
Date Posted: 28 January 2010 at 9:13pm
It certainly does exist and can be a very isolating illness. I cared for a boy with severe ADHD and it was heartbreaking to watch as the illness made him so different from his peers he couldnt relate to them and they couldnt relate to him. He had very little friends and was very lonely. Very common it people with ADHD. Agree with Smoody though hun, far too early to be even thinking about stuff like that!!!!!!! Sounds just like my nephew, he has calmed down a bit now apparently ( he is 8) now that he is playing sport regularily. Pfft, he runs dangerously! WTF are you supposed to do about the way he runs????? Some people need to think before they speak!!! -------------   
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Posted By: .Mel
Date Posted: 28 January 2010 at 9:41pm
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He just sounds to me like he's just a busy boy, and there's nothing wrong with that. He'll slow down, he just wants to explore his surroundings.... he's still young and enjoying himself.
My son tends to run rather than walk, but I put it down to him trying to keep up with his brother and sister, he just wants to be part of the "gang"... I give him gentle reminders to slow down, and he does... I agree with Bizzy, I'm not sure I agree with the way she approached you with her observations... I'm sure she could have handled it alot better. ------------- Mr Mellow (16) Miss Attitude (8) Destructa Kid (3) 
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Posted By: Jelly
Date Posted: 28 January 2010 at 10:08pm
Sorry to threadjack, but... I know ADHD makes it hard to focus, I sure do remember that (in fact I still have a ridiculously short attention span sometimes) but does it really make it harder for kids to relate to other kids? That would certainly explain my entire childhood... ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: RinTinTin
Date Posted: 28 January 2010 at 10:49pm
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Sorry didn't mean to offend anyone with the ADHD comment. I'm sure it does exist but throughout my life, time and time again, I've seen people just turn around and label a child as ADHD when it is quite blantantly obvious that the child is just bored or has no guidance or direction. It isn't fair on those that really do have ADHD cause they all get lumped into the same group. Sorry. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Tastic
Date Posted: 28 January 2010 at 10:49pm
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my aidan was always running everywhere! never walked and too has had a few head injury's. His preschool also commented on him as they were worried about all the head trauma he's had
I can't say he has slowed down but has started to look where he is going and he has learned to run 'better' then before I hope jackson slows down for you or once he learns to run better he won't keep getting injured |
Posted By: mummyofprinces
Date Posted: 28 January 2010 at 11:13pm
Yup it sure can, not for everyone but is certainly a sad part of the illness (there are varying degrees of it of course so not everyone will be the same and is more prominent in males). Sorry to threadjack back just wanted to answer that LOL -------------
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Posted By: cuppatea
Date Posted: 29 January 2010 at 10:51am
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My sisters boy has ADHD and he doesn't tear around like an idiot so I don't think it would be any indication.
I have one boy who was/is very careful, took a while to walk, will sit happily for ages and play quietly. I have another who decided walking was for losers and running like and idiot is much more fun and hey if you headbutt some furniture in the process all the better , he never stops, never sits still, is constantly into everything and doesn't think before he acts. I.e thinks that he is stable enough to walk down the back steps! or standing up on the arm of the sofa is a great idea, of course why not the dog is sleeping on the floor and will break his fall right?
He is totally normal, some kids are more bull in a china shop than others, it's his personality and it's fine. Probably just means we have boys who will get into extreme sports ------------- 
 
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Posted By: jaz
Date Posted: 29 January 2010 at 12:36pm
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My boy is the same. If he's not running he is climbing. His coordination is much better now he is a bit older so not so many crashes but always has bruises and scraps on his legs.
At his daycare they have a huge outside area and spend most of the day outside which works for him. On wet weekends we often end up going swimming or to a McDonalds playground so he can burn off a bit of energy, otherwise I catch him walking along the windowsill, riding his bike around the house and getting frustrated with crashing into furniture or jumping on the bed. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: sweetpea
Date Posted: 29 January 2010 at 1:38pm
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all i can say is it sounds to me like he is a normal boisterous boy. My girlfriend in USA has a boy who just before xmas broke his leg he is 2 this comes a little over a year after he broke his femur on the same leg. he has no underlying condition just accident prone.
i am sure he will grow out of it eventually. ------------- http://daisypath.com"> 
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Posted By: KiwiL
Date Posted: 29 January 2010 at 5:10pm
Oh, I giggled at that. Sadistic sense of humour that I have.... |
Posted By: KiwiL
Date Posted: 29 January 2010 at 5:12pm
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Well, glad to hear he's normal!!
New bruises today... what can I do?!
Oh, and the day care lady was laughing when she said it, and of course she knows there's nothing anyone can do, but there was underlying concern. Today she told me she's started wearing sandshoes to work instead of sandals to chase after Jackson! |
Posted By: catisla
Date Posted: 29 January 2010 at 5:38pm
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Laurie - just wanted to say I think Jackson is great the way he is so enthusiastic and tears around everywhere, and yes, he gets his fair share of bumps and bruises but as the others have said, this doesn't seem abnormal at all!
And certainly a future All Black in the making, and I can say "I knew him when . . ." etc etc  ------------- |
Posted By: gypsynita
Date Posted: 31 January 2010 at 9:34am
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yep we've got a very active lad here too...
have you thought about getting him into sports now? There's a soccer club in Wellington that takes kids from 1 year old (or basically, once they're walking) that sounds really good... could be a good way for him to learn some control and let off some steam at the same time? http://www.little-dribblers.co.nz/ - Toddler Soccer ------------- Anita Mum to Cian (Aug 08), Josh (Jun 10) http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: catisla
Date Posted: 31 January 2010 at 10:07am
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Thanks for that link Gypsynita
Laurie - you up for toddler soccer? I'm going to take Catriona (but enrolled for term starting in April as have missed the start of this one) - she already loves kicking balls around ------------- |
Posted By: FionaO
Date Posted: 31 January 2010 at 11:36am
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OMG hijacking thread - toddler soccer, so keen. Mind you he can't walk yet, but he will and he is obsessed with footballs ------------- 
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Posted By: catisla
Date Posted: 31 January 2010 at 1:03pm
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Fi - look at the link - there is one in J'Ville starting in April that I have booked C onto (and he will be walking by then!) ------------- |