did you change your mind
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Topic: did you change your mind
Posted By: NovemberMum
Subject: did you change your mind
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 3:31pm
about how many children you wanted.
before we had children my husband and I always agreed it would be two..but now that we have two I am not sure I want to stop at two. but I am not 100% sure.
I did tell him if we were to have a 3rd Id want around a 3 year age gap between #2 and #3. #1 would be at school and #2 probably at kindy
he did mention we would have to move however can always stick #1 and #2 in the same bedroom,. assuming I have 3 year age gap between #2 and #3, #1 and #2 will be 3 and 5 and even though they are boy and girl in the big scheme of things wont matter if they have to share a bedroom for a few years. hopefully within the next 5-7 years we will sell this house and buy a bigger house.
------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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Replies:
Posted By: Chickoin
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 3:43pm
Yeap, same as you guys, we have now decided 3 kids would be nice. #1 and #2 will be older and share the bigger room at home. If all goes to plan
eta; Duh, of course #1 and #2 will be older but I mean we want a big age gap between #2 and #3
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Posted By: palomino
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 4:08pm
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Yup everyday. I only want one but now iv had one i want another one. Well some of the time, when we go through hard times im like no way! but then i get the lovely smiles and cuddles and i want more!
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Posted By: kellie
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 4:14pm
I've always wanted four..now i think I would be very happy and complete with 2 :)
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Posted By: FreeSpirit
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 4:15pm
I always wanted two children, now I feel complete with one.
------------- http://www.babysfirstsite.com">
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Posted By: emz
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 4:54pm
no i didn't, but just thought I'd let you know that even though we have enough bedrooms our 2 still share a room because I don't see a reason why not (means we can have a junk/spare room). So you wouldn't need to move
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Posted By: Blankney94
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 5:27pm
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I'm the same HUNTD - we have one and sometimes on bad days I feel like maybe not having another. 
But deep down I don't want an "only child" family. I did use to think three would be nice, but in reality we will likely stop at two.
Also depends on the age of the mum. I will be 35 yrs when TTC No 2. If I tried to conceive No 3 I would want a larger age gap..... but then I would be more aged than I would be comfortable with IYGWIM (Down Syndrome / trimsomy risk / my energy levels etc).
------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: MyLilSquishy
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 5:43pm
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DP and I agee we want 2. we both the oldest of 3 and come from stereotypical "oldest child, middle child and youngest child syndrome" type families. having said that if we got preggy with a 3rd we wouldnt abort or give them up or anything. and we want them close in age so they can grow up together (well as together as you can with siblings i guess lol) but we do know that we definitely want 2. dont want an only child.
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Posted By: MissAngel
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 5:52pm
We agreed on one, then got preg with #2. There will be no more after this one :D
------------- Alex, Thomas and Lily http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 6:24pm
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I wanted 3 and now I want 2, althou I still get the odd day when I would love another one then I remember nappies and feeding and that puts me off.
------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived!
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Posted By: Raspberryjam
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 6:48pm
Always thought I wanted lots ,like 5 or more. I come from a family of 2 - so boring!! not enough kids around at christmas growing up. Then I had my first at 31 and though mm maybe 4, now Im like lets just see after number 3. If number 2 is a girl then maybe 4, but dont a want a boy as a middle child so Iguess indecided, but have always wanted a big family
------------- http://lilypie.com]
http://lilypie.com]
http://lilypie.com]
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Posted By: NovemberMum
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 6:51pm
if we have a 3 year age gap between #2 and #3 I will be 36/37 so I dont think that will be too bad for a 3rd.
------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Shezamumof3
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 7:12pm
Was going to be 2, now we think 3 or 4
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Posted By: mumoftwins
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 7:34pm
DH & I had agreed on 2, then we had twins! I felt slightly cheated as had only had one pregnancy, then discovered I was pregnant with #3. We thought we were finished, I even sold off some of our baby stuff..........We are due to have #4 at the end of July
This is definatley the last for us
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Posted By: Kazzle
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 7:59pm
I always wanted 4 or 5, dh always wanted 3
we have settled on 2 and have already done something about it so we hopefully cant have any more
------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: mummyofprinces
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 8:20pm
Dh wants 2 and I want 4 so am trying to get a comprimise of 3....
Like others I want a larger gap between #2 and #3... I want to have been back at work for a couple of year and then have #3 and #4...
Somehow I think this is it though... he just wont budge
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Posted By: Nikki
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 8:28pm
I originally wanted 2 and dh wanted 3, after having quite a traumatic start I decided 1 may be enough! Then a few months on I decided I wanted 3 and dh thought 2 would be enough. Now that we have 2, we've both considered a third and have decided for so many reasons (age, finance, stress etc) that two is enough. Its taken quite a few months to be about 99% sure we don't want a third.
------------- DS (5yrs) and DD (3yrs)
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Posted By: MrsMojo
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 8:54pm
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DH and I both wanted heaps, then we agreed on 3 for financial reasons. Sometimes DH say that we're stopping at 2 (and I've promised not to put any pressure on him to have anymore) then he talks about having another one of each gender. So we're up in the air.
I still want more but then again I am so happy with the 2 I have and it's more important that DH is happy too (but shhh, don't tell him).
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Posted By: mummytobesep08
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 9:41pm
YES I changed my mind lots! At first I wanted 9 (I'm serious!) but then had my first live-in-nanny job and decided 5 would be quite enough.
THEN I gave birth and it sucked so bad that for a year I said I'd never do it again (and I DID mean it) but now am hoping to have one more. And I can't help but think...maybe if the next birth goes ok and I recover well from it we might even think about another one...or two!
I'm lucky though- I have like another 20 child-bearing years left in me so plenty of time to change my mind!
------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
Angel babes '07 & '10- <3 <3
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Posted By: Mamma2N
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 9:53pm
Originally I wanted NONE I was more than content being an aunty! But then of course, we decided to try for #1 - now we have her I want loads - would be happy with atleast 4, DH only wants 2 though - just means I have something else to whinge about till he gives in
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Posted By: AandCsmum
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 9:58pm
I "THINK" we have decided to stop at two.
I love my two, I love their relationship & our relationship with them. We'd also like to be financial some time soonish again
That is this weeks decision anyway
------------- Kel
http://lilypie.com">
A = 01.02.04 & C = 16.01.09 & G = 30.03.12
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Posted By: MrsMojo
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 10:04pm
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AandCsmum wrote:
That is this weeks decision anyway |
That's what I'm like
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Posted By: Febgirl
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 10:05pm
I wanted 2 prior to having any, and now that I've got 2 it's just perfect, my family feels complete.
------------- Two little girls under 2!
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Posted By: RoSee
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 10:08pm
I never wanted any kids! Now I have 1 and I'm the happiest I have ever been in my life and have decided I want lots!
------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
September '11
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Posted By: ooEvaoo
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 10:46pm
I've always wanted loads of kiddies...I come from a family of 7 kids. DP has ranged from 1 - 5 lol. I think we've settled on 4 at the mo...but I'm willing to go one more.
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Posted By: Bobbie
Date Posted: 14 February 2010 at 10:55pm
I always wanted 4.
Within the first week of having Morgan DH and I both agreed that our family still didn't feel complete so I think despite all the feeding dramas we'll still go for at least one more.
But yes, we too will wait until Morgan is 3 before the next one is here because I think I will need Rowan to be at school.
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Posted By: minik8e
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 8:28am
We originally decided on 2....then we had twins. So we will try for a third and either hope for twins again (neither of us would mind) or I will probably try and talk DH into #4 He says only one more pregnancy so I have a lot of work to do!!
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Posted By: james
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 9:03am
i have one and i,m quite happy with one
------------- <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b4.lilypie.com/nLJ5p13.png" alt="Lilypie 4th Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a>
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Posted By: Babykatnz
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 10:34am
Before BI wasnt planning on having any at all... totally not a kiddy person... then circumstances changed and whether I liked it or not I was going to have a baby... his birth put me right off ever doing THAT again... until I split with his dad and met DP who didnt have kids and he couldnt wait to have one of his own one day (and apparentl that 'one day' actually meant soon in his books!)
So I agreed 1 more and that was it... lol! I enjoyed my pregnancy, birth experience and having a new baby so much, that I put the hard word on DP and now we are TTCing for our last... funny how minds change over time! I went from None, to one more and thats it, to oh... actually... hah!
If we have any more after the one we are trying for now, we will welcome the new addition, but we wont be going out of our way to TRY for another one... 3 is our ideal now.
------------- Brandon - 05/12/2003

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Posted By: my4beauties
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 11:22am
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growing up I always wanted 3 children (girl first then 2 boys), and Dh & I agreed on 3 children too. But after having our 3rd, Dh started talking about having another, and I couldn't resist!
Our family definitely felt complete after #3, but now it's DEFINITELY complete with having Ava! I always thought having 4 children would be too many, and it is busy! But it feels just right for us.
------------- My babies:
R (9),G (7), J (5)
http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: peanut butter
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 11:48am
MrsMojo wrote:
AandCsmum wrote:
That is this weeks decision anyway |
That's what I'm like |
me too. We have deferred a decision till later in the year. WE always said 3 but i dunno...like Sarah said, I will be 38 in Sept so thats my make or break. We either go for it then and get it done before 39 or we stop.
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Posted By: flakesitchyfeet
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 11:57am
We flip between 3 and 4 all of the time. Twins run in the family, we have a 14month old and one due in August, so maybe we'll just have one more pregancy and see what happens.
And in 24months time I'll be back in this thread, saying maybe just one more pregnancy, and we'll see what happens.
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Posted By: jano1
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 12:38pm
Mamma2N wrote:
Originally I wanted NONE I was more than content being an aunty!  |
Same here
We think 2 and am having to think long and hard about when to TTC. I'm not getting any younger (36 this year) and want to get ahead with work (I went back and studied for 5 years so this is important to me as well). I thought we might TTC this year but might look for a new job so that puts a spanner in the works. It's all a bit too confusing at the moment
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Posted By: ElfsMum
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 1:06pm
We both said two... but if we had of had another mc I would seriously have thought about stopping at one.. as i emotionally couldn't do it for a third time.. now however we have our gorgeous Liam and so i had my tubes tied.
------------- Mum to two amazing boys!
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Posted By: Lexidore
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 1:14pm
We always said two, When I was pregnant I was very very hesitant about the second one, and DP all of a sudden started talking about 3! While pregnant I figured in 5 years I would be ready to look at number 2, Now we are already discussing number 2 and will be TTC when Lexie is 1 as long as I am fitter and healthier than I was before my last pregnancy and that DP has a new job (he just graduated) I sometimes think maybe 3 would be okay but I just don't think it will work for us.
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Posted By: Daizy
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 1:27pm
I wanted 2. I still do..... practically it works really well for us. Doesn't mean that I am not longing for a 3rd. This week is good - I am happy with my 2, I dont need to go through the whole baby stage again...
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Posted By: CuriousG
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 1:32pm
Daizy wrote:
I wanted 2. I still do..... practically it works really well for us. Doesn't mean that I am not longing for a 3rd. This week is good - I am happy with my 2, I dont need to go through the whole baby stage again... |
Sums up exactly how I feel about it all.
I have an IUD and we have decided that at that 5 year mark, when it has to come out, we will talk about whether or not we want to go through it all again.
------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Daizy
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 1:40pm
CuriousG wrote:
Daizy wrote:
I wanted 2. I still do..... practically it works really well for us. Doesn't mean that I am not longing for a 3rd. This week is good - I am happy with my 2, I dont need to go through the whole baby stage again... |
Sums up exactly how I feel about it all.
I have an IUD and we have decided that at that 5 year mark, when it has to come out, we will talk about whether or not we want to go through it all again. |
I have been meaning to get an IUD since Maddi was born, I even went for my first appointment and never followed it up. Now I don't know if I am ready to wait another 5 years. I am thinking I will wait one more year and if I am not 'accidentally' up the duff then I'll get it.
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Posted By: julz85
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 6:10pm
I always wanted 2 children , i wanted to be hapily married and own a house and have two children , but when i unexpectadly got pregnant on the pill at 24 to my awful on again/ off again "now ex" boyfriend my grand plan went out the window . My now 7 month old daughters dad and i have not been together since i was barely pregnant and then recently ( when Amelia was 3 months old) i met my current partner and we have been pretty serious ever since. he has a 5 year old daughter who he has all the time so already its kind of like having 2 children , altho not together long we are already talking about having a child ( in the very distant future when married and settled down) so between the 2 of us that would make it 3 . not conventianal i guess , but then again what is "conventinal" these days ? Im very blessed to have my wee Amelia and wouldnt change her for the world , my current partner treats her like his own and as her real dad has only seen her 4 times in her life Amelia doesnt even know or recognise him yet she beams and giggles the second my partner walks in the door , its so cute . so , yea i definatly think down the track i would want another , id just definalty make sure it was under different circumstances and be alot more prepared because its super hard going through pregnancy and those early months on your own , altho totaly worth it when my wee girl smiles at me :)
------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: mamanee
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 7:25pm
I always wanted three kids and my DP doesn't mind either way but is happy with at least one more as he would like more than one of his own. If the next one is a boy we will try one more time for a girl. If the next one is a girl I think we'll stop.
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Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 8:17pm
Ha ha, he wanted two, I was thinking three but then got so evilly ill in my second pregnancy that I swore I'd never do it again - ended up getting the bonus prize from that pregnancy (twins!), plus a big surprise 20 months later.
After the gremlins, I really wanted another, and managed to convince Willie, but we were thinking we'd start TTC once the gremlins started preschool. After 13 mths TTC the gremlins, we didn't expect to get a one-shot wonder on their first birthday .
Since lil miss tho, I have felt our family is complete. It just seems to fit, and even tho I cluck over other people's babies, I'm also glad I'm past that now. We just sold the cot which was sad, but also exciting - the start of a new era.
We haven't made any permanent "arrangements", as I could potentially still have babies 15 years from now, but four children is plenty, and I think we'll stick with it. Having kids young means I'm now in a position to focus on my career, and we'll be able to afford to give the kids a decent lifestyle - four kids is HORRENDOUSLY expensive! 
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Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
 The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: ?Lolly?
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 10:31pm
Hmmm, I always wanted three. And I got three. I am paranoid about getting pregnant again even though I have an IUD bahaha. I suppose we might change our minds in a few years time but I REALLY don't want to have to buy a bigger car!!!!!!!
------------- Captain Chaos (5) & the Trouble Monsters (2!)
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Posted By: Hunnybunny
Date Posted: 16 February 2010 at 9:54am
We bounce between 2 and 3 quite a bit, but generally sway towards 2.
I came from a family of 4, I'm the youngest, and 3 older are all boys. I would never, ever, do that to one of my kids, so if we ended up with 3 boys, it'd most definately be the last!!!!
But yeah I think we are pretty mutually agreed on 2. But then again, number 1 isn't even here yet, and we do have a 4 bedroomed house so who knows?!!??
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Posted By: EmDee
Date Posted: 16 February 2010 at 10:37am
When pregnant with Ollie, DH & I agreed on 2. After Lilia was born we would sway between 2 & 3. Actually I should say that I swayed between 2 & 3! DH was happy with 2 but would have given it serious thought if I really wanted 3. Anyway I finally decided that no, 2 is fine for us. Then 6 or so weeks later, surprise! BFP!
Now that Caleb is on his way it feels right and I haven't admitted it to DH yet, but I've actually started thinking about number 4! This is mainly because Ollie & Lilia get on so well and I worry about 1 child being left out.
*If* we were to have another after Caleb, I would want to have it sooner rather than later as I think small age gaps work well for us and I'd rather not be too much older when pregnant.
Oh and on the room thing, O & L started sharing a room this weekend to free up a room for bub. The first night was a bit of a 'mare (it was waaay too exciting for Lilia) but since then we've only had to return her to bed about 3 times a night. They seem to enjoy sharing a room and Ollie usually sleeps through most of Lilia's antics
Good luck with the decision making J!
------------- DS 8 DD 6 DS 4 DD 2
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Posted By: NovemberMum
Date Posted: 16 February 2010 at 3:25pm
yeah DH has been asking me how serious I am about having a 3rd but yeah not ready to make a decision one way or the other.
also even if we didnt end up having 3 I would still want to move.
------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: ButterflyMum
Date Posted: 17 February 2010 at 8:25pm
always wanted 6 but when we found out #4 was a girl we thought yep we done. so arranged apt to get tubes done now I have #4 i am not going through with tube thing cause We want more just worried what other's will say. cause of the money thing.
but back to wanting 6.
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