hi there
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Category: General Chat
Forum Name: General Chat
Forum Description: For mums, dads, parents-to-be, grandparents, friends -- you name it! And you name the topic you want to chat about!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=31661
Printed Date: 07 August 2025 at 7:11am
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Topic: hi there
Posted By: teenmum09
Subject: hi there
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 11:15am
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hi iim 17 im a solo mum to a baby boy thats just turned one i fell pregnant at 15 had him not long after i turned 16 i was working 60hours a week before i found out(i'd left school) i was 25weeks i didnt have the guts to tell mum until i was just over 30 weeks i know the looks when i had my son my midwife was on holiday and the back up wouldnt attend the birth as i was being induced so i got passed over to a hospital midwife and i got treated like dirt i was only aloud to touch my baby to feed him and even then i had a nurse there at all times i wast aloud to change his nappy or anything. i had very bad depression and on a very strong antidepressnt i was drinking right up till i found out if i wasnt working i was drinking. now if i walk down the st i get horrible looks ive lost friends every thing, by now your possibly wondering what the point of this is.. well the point is i wouldnt change it for the world if i hadnt of had my son i would so be drinking my life away we have our ups and downs hes been in and out of hospital. but its all worth it to get home and have cuddles with my little man
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Replies:
Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 11:29am
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Hi there, welcome to OB :-)
I had my daughter when I was 20 but look a lot younger, didn't get all the looks you got tho, or if I did , I just ignored them . Its sad and bizarre that you were treated like we still lived in the 1920s, when I was pregnant I lived at Bethany with plenty of girls your age and younger who were pregnant and they were treated like any other pregnant woman . Anyway , welcome to OB , glad your enjoying your little man . ------------- 
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Posted By: MyLilSquishy
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 11:35am
welcome  there are a surprising amount of women that still get dirty looks even though they married and already have other kids and are in their mid to late 20s. i know it sucks to get those looks, but just remember its their problem. they may be jealous, they may have personal reasons (ie daughter, sister, themselves) that makes them disagree with "young" mums. but if you love your little boy thats all you need to worry about. if i understand your post properly then you have stopped yourself drinking which is a HUGE thing and you should be so proud of that! where abouts are you from? coz everyone in here ive ever posted with is absolutely lovely and im sure there is a group on here that has started a coffee group in your area and would be happy to see you good luck hun! pm me if you ever need to chat or unload or just say hi
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Posted By: MissAngel
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 11:39am
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Welcome to OB! My best friend had her son when she was 15 (she's 30 now) so I totally know what you're going thru! Good on you for sticking with it, you'll get nothing but joy in your life from your little man :D Dont worry about losing friends - if they dont have the balls to be your mate now, then they're not worth your time! ------------- Alex, Thomas and Lily http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 11:41am
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Hey teenmum!
I'm 19 and having my first in a couple of weeks, I get looks being pregnant but I just ignore them - it's not their life or their business! I have a friend who got pregnant at 15 and had a little boy just after she turned 16 also, her family kicked her out and she went to stay in a home for pregnant girls in Welly, she too got treated in a similar way to you and it was sad. She went on to have a little girl the following year and is now about to have her 3rd. Unlike you, she lost her first 2 babies as because she didn't have any support, she was deemed unfit to look after them and they were taken away. Enjoy you're little man, and all the best for the future!! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Raspberryjam
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 12:16pm
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Hope things keep getting better for you sweet
I still get nasty looks from old people cause I look young, especially now that Im pregnant again and Im 33!! I was in a lingerie store and the woman followed me around like I was going to steal everything - bet my husband makes more than her!! and I was wearing really expensive clothes People are so judgemental - you just have to remind yourself that they must be miserable to have to look down on other people to make themselves feel better Enjoy your little guy - 1 is such a cute age ------------- http://lilypie.com] 
http://lilypie.com] 
http://lilypie.com] 
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Posted By: Kalimirella
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 12:29pm
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hey and welcome :D
Don't worry bout what other ppl think, it was your choice to keep and have your baby son and as long as you care for him and love him thats whats best for you!!! I 2nd what kahlia said, theres sure to be a mums meet up somewhere round where you live and everyone I've met on OB are really nice. ------------- Kiara is 3 and Teagan is 2, now we're expecting our long awaited 3rd! http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: teenmum09
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 12:44pm
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hey thanks you im from tauranga
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Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 12:55pm
So true!! ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Raspberryjam wrote:Posted By: Caro07
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 1:09pm
I am appalled on your behalf at how you were treated when you gave birth. It isn't a MW's job to make a judgement on you and your life  It isn't surprising that you got bad depression after being treated like that.
I am sure you are a fab mum and it sounds like you dote on your little boy. Welcome to OB, stick around there is heaps of support and advice available here.------------- Caroline, SAHM to 2 boys, S (4 years old) and J (2 years old) 
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Posted By: Daizy
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 1:25pm
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Welcome to OhBaby!
I am sure you will find lots of lovely young mums around here... and lovely older mums too! I too am/was a young mum, and totally agree how having a baby often can change your life for the better. I often wonder what I would be up to today if I didn't get pregnant so young and I think I could easily still be at home, lacking confidence, still not having any direction in life. I am now 23 and have 2 beautiful girls, I am married and I am happy! That is shocking how you were treated in hospital  It is a sad fact that there are people out there that have to be so judgemental! Even now I notice the odd look but I now know I that I am so much better than they are ------------- 
 
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Posted By: pikelets
Date Posted: 15 February 2010 at 8:16pm
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Welcome!
Sorry to hear you have had such a hard time! Sounds like the friends you lost weren't really friends anyway. It does suck when people are so judgemental! Theres heaps of support on here hun!  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
 3 Angels - Dec10 / Mar11 / Dec11
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