Should we stop encouraging it?
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Topic: Should we stop encouraging it?
Posted By: MissCandice
Subject: Should we stop encouraging it?
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 4:27pm
Kylah is into cars, trucks, trains, planes and all boys toys really.
Someone said to me today 'but she is supposed to be a girl'
Should i stop encouraging it? I dont think its a problem, she can be what she wants to be. I mean she dresses like a girl, just plays with boys toys.
------------- ~ Mummy to a beautiful girl ~
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Replies:
Posted By: BusyMum2three
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 4:37pm
My niece is the same - she loves anything with wheels! I cant see it really being a problem... Just because she is a girl doesnt mean she has to play with dolls.
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Posted By: catisla
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 4:41pm
Definitely don't stop her! Let her play with whatever she finds fun i think . . .
I vividly remember when I was 4 and at playgroup Santa came to see us and gave all the girls toy jewelery and all the boys toy helicopters. I ended up swapping my jewelery for a boy's helicopter as that was what we each wanted. I remember is so well because ervybody thought we were odd and laughed at us
I always played with 'boys' toys and I think I have turned out ok . . .
ps. tell such people to mind their own business - and chalk it up on the list of 'helpful advice that shall not be followed' (i've got quite a collection now)
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Posted By: FreeSpirit
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 4:44pm
I think this other person is a closet sexist! There is nothing wrong with being a child, and playing child's games. She will establish her own sexual identity as she gets older.
------------- http://www.babysfirstsite.com">
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 4:47pm
WTF it's 2010 not the 1800's, so sad that some people like to sterotype what girl and boys should be into.
If she likes it go for it!
------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">
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Angel June 2012
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Posted By: Freesia
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 4:47pm
Livvy's into trucks, planes, helicopter, etc and doesn't really play with dolls. Her toy of the moment is a transformers car and I can't see the harm in it. It's just what takes her fancy at the moment.
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Posted By: jaycee
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 5:26pm
Amy is really into her Thomas the Tank Engine stuff and it was her favourite thing she got at Christmas. For her birthday we are going to buy her a "house" for her engines.
On the other hand I can not get her into a pair of trousers, leggings is as close as it gets. It is all about skirts and dresses .
Your wee girl is happy and playing with things she enjoys, bugger anyone else .
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Posted By: Delli
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 5:31pm
Agree with what everyone else has said so far.
Guess it may have just been an offhand remark but I think it's stink that there are still people out there who really think that there should be boy's toys and boys games and girls toys and girls games. Bugs me when I see toys labelled as girls and boys toys. Even clothes are still so different for the different sexes when they really don't need to be. At that age it doesn't matter but shops still seem to be making it into a huge issue.....
------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: FionaO
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 5:40pm
Sounds like a very old fashioned comment to me.
Growing up as soon as I knew I could I refused to wear anything remotely girly, insisted on short hair, never had a doll or a barbie, action figures all the way.
My DH has a cousin, now 15 who at about 5 or so wanted to be a girl, then a train, not a train driver just the actual train, then back to wanting to be a girl and only wanting to wear pink, he hates it if we talk about this now obviously.
I think my point is it doesn't matter
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Posted By: _H_
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 5:46pm
if she is happy does it really matter? sounds like the person who said something about it has a problem not your DD (who is a gorgeous GIRL btw!)
------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: Raspberryjam
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 5:59pm
how stupid, let her play with things she likes. Even better let her play with things that YOU think are ok - your her parent
------------- http://lilypie.com]
http://lilypie.com]
http://lilypie.com]
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Posted By: Bobbie
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 6:22pm
Rowan loves cars too. Let her play with whatever toy she wants.
Also it may improve her driving later in life. Apparently boys do better at cornering etc. in cars because they've practiced so much with toy ones.
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Posted By: Bobbie
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 6:23pm
Argh! double post
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Posted By: rorylex
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 6:27pm
lol my boys like playing with dolls prams and sylvanian family toys so we have 2 dolls prams dont see why they cant play with certain toys just becoz of there gender
------------- Mummy to 4 boys
Samuel - 18.6.05
Rory - 15.7.06
Mason - 13.06.08
Emmett - 24.01.10
Baby #5 - cooking
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Posted By: BaAsKa
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 6:41pm
my boy LOVES pushing toy prams around and has a "baby" (teddybear hotwater bottle! lol)......yet hes such a boy boy boy!!!!!
I say let her be!!!! you seem to be into your cars so maybe shes just like her mumma!!
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Posted By: KiwiL
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 7:24pm
Agreed, let her play with what she wants to play with. As long as she is engaging in imaginative play, that's what matters.
I had to smile though, as I thought to myself "I wonder if the question was the other way (eg my boy will only play with dolls and pink stuff) if all the opinions would be the same". It should be, and I think at OhBaby it probably would be... but I bet you'd get more people commenting on, and discouraging, boys playing with girls toys than the other way around these days!
On that topic, Jackson has spent the weekend trying to put my bras on. He keeps wandering off to the bedroom, retrieving one, and putting his arms through the straps. And if he has two, one goes on his head. All very cute until I start finding bras at the front door!!
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Posted By: my2angels
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 9:20pm
Addison is the same, although she also dresses in boys clothes and refuses to wear skirts or dresses or anything girly... I think its cos she is around so many boys and Im hoping will grow out of it
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Posted By: minik8e
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 9:34pm
She's not "supposed" to be a girl, she IS a girl. Being into dolls doesn't define her as a girl.
I'm a girl and I've never been into dolls, always been about cars for me. I've especially always had a fascination for trucks, and wanted to be a truck driver at one stage too!!
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Posted By: myfullhouse
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 9:42pm
minik8e wrote:
She's not "supposed" to be a girl, she IS a girl. Being into dolls doesn't define her as a girl. |
Well put!
Personally I think it is important for kids to play with whatever they like whether they be traditionally boys or girls toys.
Jack loves playing with the 'babies' at playcentre and pushes the pushchairs around all the time. He has his own baby at home that I gave him when I was pg with Ben. At kindy the other day he and 2 other boys were the only kids in the house play area!
Yet Jack also loves his cars. It makes for a well rounded child I think
------------- Lindsey
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Posted By: Delli
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 9:59pm
my2angels wrote:
I think its cos she is around so many boys and Im hoping will grow out of it |
Why do you hope she will grow out of it?
Just curious
I'm not sure why people need girls to be in dresses and skirts and play with dolls to be girls and if they do otherwise - hope that it's just a phase and that they will grow out of it. Vice versa for boys.
My thinking is that of course when they grow up they will be different (body-wise, not brain function ) but the more "equal" boys and girls can be when they are younger, the more equal they will be when they are older. As it is, young girls and boys get it drummed into them from an early age (if not by their parents, then by society in general) that girls should do this and boys should do that.
It leads to things like, for example: Physics and math being branded as a "boys" subjects and history and english being branded as a "girls" subjects. So, of course with "society" saying that physics and math is a boys subject, less girls will take physics and math - not because they are not as capable at doing physics and math but because they have been guided this way. And this leads to people saying that girls are not as good at maths or physics because less girls take these subjects. And the cycle goes around and around.
The whole equality of the sexes thing is getting better but I still think we can do more to help it along
Gosh, don't know if that makes any sense and I know that this thread probably wasn't meant to be that serious but oh well.
------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Snappy
Date Posted: 28 March 2010 at 10:21pm
Janaya was the same. She had Thomas sets, Cars, Road maps, the lot!
Shes a very well rounded girl
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Posted By: ?Lolly?
Date Posted: 29 March 2010 at 12:32am
Why limit children's play by limiting what they can play with? We give our Son dolls and a cooker to play with and he loves it all.
------------- Captain Chaos (5) & the Trouble Monsters (2!)
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Posted By: MissCandice
Date Posted: 29 March 2010 at 7:35am
Thank you everyone for your replies. I thought it was great that she is into a wide variety of play. She is fantastic at imaginative play as well, our PAFT teacher was amazed. Kylah builds roads, and tunnels and houses to drive her cars through, its incredibly cute
Thanks again, for putting me at ease, she went to bed in her lightning pajamas i got her from Australia last night :)
------------- ~ Mummy to a beautiful girl ~
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Posted By: kiwikid
Date Posted: 29 March 2010 at 8:07am
I agree with everyone else, DS loves his babies / tea set as much as he does his trains / cars - I think its perfectly natural.
The book I am reading 'Raising Boys' says that up til they are 6yrs of age there are essentially no differences between the sexes, they should be encouraged to play however they like and should be parented the same.
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Posted By: didi99
Date Posted: 29 March 2010 at 10:09am
I used to play with trucks and car etc when I was young also hated dresses and skirts, but have turned out to be a perfectly normal woman (so I like to think ). But I would of been so upset if my mum had tryed to stop me from playing with them, so I say leave her be and tell that woman to but out!
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Angel Babies Nov 09, May 10, Dec 10
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Posted By: LittleBug
Date Posted: 29 March 2010 at 12:07pm
I was a complete tomboy, cars/trucks were my favourite toys, and I hated wearing dresses.
I've changed a little now
It always surprises me how girly Chloe is, I just keep wondering where she got that from, since I was the complete opposite when I was little!
------------- Chloe (4 years) and Oliver (3 years).
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Posted By: WRXnKids
Date Posted: 29 March 2010 at 6:56pm
Josh is a total boy boy like you wouldnt believe but still first thing he went for at daycare was a pram to push around and he has a bathing doll (we thought it might help him learn gentle when the baby comes) and a BBQ to cook on (my sis though it was more manly than a pink oven haha)
I think its all good for him and not going to harm him in anyway in fact i think if he likes to play dolls and house now its only going to make him a better father one day in the future (when im old and ready to be a grandparent not before)
I did think people thought girls playing boys games/toys was more acceptable than the other way round but obviously some people are still a bit backwards
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Posted By: my2angels
Date Posted: 30 March 2010 at 1:03pm
StaceyL wrote:
my2angels wrote:
I think its cos she is around so many boys and Im hoping will grow out of it |
Why do you hope she will grow out of it?
Just curious
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Because at this stage she is adamint she will be wearing Kobes old unitorm to school and Im not sure how to get her to wear a dress or even those skort things girls wear.
And I dont mean she just likes to wear boys t shirts etc.. she want boy undies, boy socks, if we go to buy new shoes she goes straight for the boy shoes. she wont have her hair up in anything other than a ponytail to keep it off her face, if we go to parties she always wants the boys party bag (like at chipmunks they sometimes have girl or boy party bags) Im not worried because she plays with her dolls as much as the cars etc.. all that stuff doesnt bother me but I also dont want to her be laughed at at school etc.. for wearing boys uniform, thats even if the school did let her which I doubt they would.
Although I must admit it would be nice to see her wearing a skirt or dress and some pretty sandals every now and then
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Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 30 March 2010 at 1:44pm
at the school my boy attends there is no girl uniform... and a lot are like that now. they seem to prefer the girls (and boys) to wear pants at primary. it certainly makes it easier to run around and play in my books. it sounds more to me like hero worship of her big brother...and thats sweet!
my girl loves cars and playing in the dirt and her push chair and dolls, she loves the sandpit at kindy and the playdough table... as do my boys!
short answer to the original question though is NO!
------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker">
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 30 March 2010 at 1:52pm
The uniform for the school near us, is polo shirts and shorts or pants too. They don't have a girls or boys uniform.
DH informed me that our kids will be into guns, tanks and airplanes regardless of gender , he was proudly explaining about a Dad who has made a mini sized air rifle for his little girl.
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Angel June 2012
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Posted By: my2angels
Date Posted: 30 March 2010 at 1:57pm
the school ours are at still have the checkered pinafore, skirt or skorts although she will get to wear the same plain blue polo top. (blue is her favourite colour)
Not sure its big brother worship, its just any boys clothes. she got wet at a friends house so they gave her one of thier boys tops and she wore it for 3 days straight before I could talk her into something else.
Poor Kobe tho, he gets so sick of her raiding his drawers, I always get Muuum Addison wont stop wearing my clothes, mum make Addison stay out of my drawers.
We have a friends who's wee boy loves getting dressed up in girls clothes so when he comes round its like a roll reversal, he will come out in Addisons dresses and girly shoes and she comes out in his clothes, looks so funny
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Posted By: Delli
Date Posted: 30 March 2010 at 5:12pm
Hah - don't get me started on primary schools (or any schools for that matter!) that still make girls wear dresses or skirts to school while the boys get to wear shorts and pants. It's ridiculous!
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 30 March 2010 at 6:02pm
They do look cute though
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Angel June 2012
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Posted By: Delli
Date Posted: 30 March 2010 at 7:48pm
Not to me
I only think how impractical they are....
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