Close in age considerations
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Category: Have A Baby?
Forum Name: First baby? Second or more?
Forum Description: Want help? Need support? Want tips? Men and women share advice and tips in this supportive community
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=3496
Printed Date: 07 October 2025 at 7:10am
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Topic: Close in age considerations
Posted By: Bizzy
Subject: Close in age considerations
Date Posted: 17 August 2006 at 5:18pm
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Following on from another post i was thinking about all the other things that we forget to consider when you have kids close together.
I know hubby and i always planned two kids but then didnt plan on things like needing the cot so soon again, or the pushchair needing to accommodate two. This led to us having to put gabriel in a bed sooner than i really wanted to. Also i had to buy a double buggy cause i brought the only brand of single that didnt have a toddler seat. But then again i didnt like any of the toddler seat attachments either. so does anyone else have any other things they wish they had considered when having two kids close together...other than the guilt that is... you will never expect that i dont think. ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
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Replies:
Posted By: AlyAyde
Date Posted: 17 August 2006 at 5:51pm
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That the new one might be born with some health problems that will mean lots and lots of time away from your other child who is still a baby too and still needs lots of mummy time.
The isolation..... worse when you have a toddler that is used to going to lots of places and mummy just cant be naffed because she has been up all night or dealing with other things etc. But its all good when the baby gets to be a few months old. seeing them play and share so much togeather because they are close in age. ------------- Jayde 25/12/04 Alyssa 08/04/03 http://Alyayde.bebo.com |
Posted By: emeldee
Date Posted: 17 August 2006 at 7:02pm
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How completely stuffed you'll be during the pregnancy when you have morning sickness and a little one starting to crawl followed by the exhaustion of a third trimester with a walking (running) toddler to chase that is too difficult to lift....
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Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 17 August 2006 at 8:39pm
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Eeek.. you guys make me feel glad that there's no possibility of another one!!
Though I am sure they are delightful too 
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Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 17 August 2006 at 9:23pm
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oooh yes the toddler that learns that they can run away in shops just when you get to the point where even walking AROUND a shop is hard work for you.. which then leads to them learning that not only can they run away in shops - but mummy can't catch them either!!
Havinga 1st child that is so easy that the second one who doesn't sleep well, is fiesty and completely different just throws you into a complete headspin! ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja 
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Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 17 August 2006 at 9:27pm
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oh and having a hubby who only really wanted 1 kid, has had trouble bonding with the second one (possibly because she is soooo much like him!) and now that #2 has turned into a hair pulling biting hitting mischievious monster sometimes - who still wakes and screams the house down many times some night - cpoing with the remark "see, this is why i only wanted 1" (don't even ask what i say back.. It would have to be censored.. lol - j.k.. i usually say yes but we have two, we can't go back so just suck it up and deal with it!) ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja
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Posted By: 11111
Date Posted: 18 August 2006 at 7:58am
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I think the only thing I wish I has considered is how hard getting about would be without a driver's licence in a town that is made up of hill's. I was very much house bound the last month of the pregancy and now Michael is here its harder to go out with friend's who have kid's cause its hard to fit them all in the car. Other then that it seem's to be going well so far, but it is very much early day's just yet. ------------- Deborah Mum to:   
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Posted By: my2angels
Date Posted: 18 August 2006 at 12:44pm
| Grocery shopping. If you cant find the right trolley and have to put the capsule in the trolley there isnt much room for food. You cant take the pushchair because then you cant push the trolley and if you have the toddler running around its hard to keep up with them with the trolley. Sometimes Im so busy putting back whatever kobe has pulled off the shelf I forget Ive left Addison and my handbag sitting down the other end of the aisle! |
Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 18 August 2006 at 2:51pm
And when you do find the right trolley - th eyounger one soon learns that they can reach the back of their sisters clothes from where they are.. and when they both go into the upright seats in the trolley - they beat each other up, and the second one still likes to pull at her sister but now it's her hair that she can reach.
I swear - boys MUST be better than girls - correct me here, but at least there is less hair to pull... and boys seem to get over it a bit quicker... girls just keep going and going.. again, correct me if i am wrong.. have nannied boys, but not a mum to boys so only have partial experience. ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja
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Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 18 August 2006 at 5:15pm
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if i sit the boys together in the trolley gabriel leans all over toby or bangs him onthe head with cans when putting them in the trolley for me. ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker">
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Posted By: caraMel
Date Posted: 18 August 2006 at 5:37pm
Eeek! I'm beginning to dread going grocery shopping! It was hard enough getting through it with just Ella to contend with  ------------- Mel, Mummy to E: 6, B: 4 and: 
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Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 18 August 2006 at 8:01pm
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Taine pulls hair. jake finally has some. Weirdly enough though, Jake seems to like it. He puts his head near taine's hands and waits. very very strange.
The guilt was my big thing. I feel like Jake is soo overwhelming, I forget about Taine sometimes. Jake was read to EVERYDAY since before he was born. Yet Taine would be lucky if he gets read a book once a week. And it's not just me I'm pleased to note. A lady at playcentr said she is exactly the same. the older one is so vocal and can do so much, you kinda forget about little quiet one in the corner! |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 20 August 2006 at 9:59am
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*Off to sign up for Internet grocery shopping* -------------  Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 20 August 2006 at 2:06pm
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Yep Liz - we realised the same - Paris was read a story every night before bed.. and h=now that has even stopped for her, Ayja doesn't get read to, i stop and MAKE myself sit down and work at things with her - cos i used to sit and play with Paris all the time cos i was a SAHM for the first year and only part time study after that.. which i believe is why Paris learnt to sit and figure stuff out and knew how to do stuff - cos she was taught and helped to do it. Poor 2nd child. no wonder they learnt to beat up their older sibling! ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja
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Posted By: Kazzle
Date Posted: 21 August 2006 at 7:40am
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lol, what are you guys trying to do....put me off getting pregnant again at xmas time...eeeekkkkk
lol maybe just maybe i will hold out till jan 07 ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 21 August 2006 at 1:33pm
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dont want to put you off - after xmas would be better tho cause then you can enjoy xmas booze and ham etc...
but even tho i wanted two kids i wasnt really prepared for it. a lot of supermarkets arent really geared up trolley wise for two small kids unless you use the capsule and toddler seat combo...and i know that gabriel is only just now at almost 3 able to walk in the shops with me, but only for short times. theres things too like i used to keep gabriels bedroom door open all the time, but i cant with toby cause gabriel will go and play in his room and wake him up. then i worry that toby will wake gabriel up if he screams in the middle of the night... and somtimes he does if he wakes too early, so like on sat i had both kids up at 6.30 raring to go. and yeah being read to - gabriel gets stories every night with daddy, toby is lucky if he gets one once a week. men seem to be unable to share those sorts of things. it took ages for hubby to get used to bathing two at once and he doesnt know how to read to them both. its a shame too cause i discovered that toby loves being read it... he took to it much better than gabriel ever did. oh and comparing them all the time. i am constantly saying "gabriel did this at..." and it drives me batty cause they are two very diff kids. oh wow that was a novel... (and this from the lady who cant decide wether she wants another or not... )------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker">
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Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 21 August 2006 at 5:15pm
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ooh yes having 2 diff kids is hard.. Ayja is very physical she moved and cralwed and is nearly walking - whereas Paris never rolled, never crawled and i have to tell myself that's why they have developed well in different areas.
I was always worried Ayja would wake paris too - so would rush to her straight away.. which is hard, cos then #2 gets into the habit of being picked up for every whimper. ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja
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Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 21 August 2006 at 9:28pm
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I babysat for the neighbours kids the other night and was sooooo glad that the younger one (Hannah's age) is very placid and happy. I managed to get him in the highchair with some food, put the older one to bed, tried to get Hannah to bed (to no avail) then the older one had got out of bed to ask why Hannah was crying, then I tried to put him back to bed and left Hannah to play in the lounge... then I heard the quietest little noises coming from the highchair and realised the poor little one was still sitting there! He'd pushed his plate away from him and was just waiting for me to notice that he had finished!
The kids got to bed quite a bit later than their designated bedtime. Definitely couldn't do it full time unless the other one was like my neighbour's youngest!!! |
Posted By: Kazzle
Date Posted: 22 August 2006 at 7:55am
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oh the joys of what i have to look forward too... ------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Kelpa
Date Posted: 22 August 2006 at 9:27am
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he he I would never have coped with two littlies.......
I like my seven year age gap. Paige is great. She is independent which is helpful. And at school...so I get baby and Mum time...which I love. ...But down Side is the age gap means she has no siblings so we do have to spend a lot of time with her.....as she cant just go out in the garden and play with her siblings!!! -------------  
 
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Posted By: daikini
Date Posted: 22 August 2006 at 10:15am
Me first!
Kiya started morning kindy the day Josiah was born... so 5 mornings a week, there was just me and him! At least I'll have 6 weeks or so to figure out having two at home before the school holidays start, and there's three at home. ------------- Becca, mum of 2 girls & 3 boys |
Kazzle wrote:Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 23 August 2006 at 12:06pm
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Just thought I would add my 2 cents worth... Something I hadn't considered, was how I would cope with JJ and morning sickness/tiredness, especailly since both Rods folks are dead, and My parents live in CHCH, and my dad is dying in hosp, so they can't come up.
Not that I regret getting pregnant, this was the plan, I just didn't think the sickness would be as chronic or last as long as it has, it wasn't this bad first time around. I am also wiped out totally with tiredness, especailly since JJ dosen't sleep through, and last night, the spewing olympics started at 2.30am. Poor wee man was beside himself, as was I. so I am off work today (again)looking after my wee man, and after the hell past few months, I really want to throw in my mummy badge. ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 23 August 2006 at 12:07pm
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oooh but don't let me put you off!! In the long run, I am hoping it will pay off having the babies close together, friends, etc. ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |