police and parenting
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Category: General Chat
Forum Name: General Chat
Forum Description: For mums, dads, parents-to-be, grandparents, friends -- you name it! And you name the topic you want to chat about!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=35708
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Topic: police and parenting
Posted By: Bexee
Subject: police and parenting
Date Posted: 12 September 2010 at 4:25pm
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Just wondering whether anyone has trained to be a police officer while a parent?
Or whether there are any cops on here that can give me any advice on how the two combine once training has finished? |
Replies:
Posted By: myfullhouse
Date Posted: 12 September 2010 at 6:22pm
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I am not a police officer but have known a few that are also parents (2 male and 1 female) and I think that it depends on what police role you have.
My Uncle was quite high up at the Police College and he worked long hours, sometimes on the weekend and I don't think he saw his kids too much A collegue from work is married to a Police Officer and as he is a 'beat cop' he does shift work and I imagine at times he doesn't see his little girl much and other times he has whole days with her - I think he is on something like 4 days on/4 days off and works a mix of day and night shift A Mum at playcentre is a police officer but she has more of a desk job type role I think and works fixed days and hours and only 4 days. So for her I would imagine that hours wise it would be like any other job, and she would see her daughter as much as any working parent. Not sure if this is a help  ------------- Lindsey 
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Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 12 September 2010 at 6:39pm
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The only cop I know doesn't have kids. But he doesn't even seem to have time for anything let alone a relationship or kids He works in hamilton and his shift work completely shatters him. He said it really messes him up and spends his days off recovering just to do it all over again. He also said because hes a new cop (hes probably 3ish years out of police college) that he doesn't really get much choice about what job he gets. He also ends up going in early and working late because of all the paperwork that he doesn't have time for during his shift.
I think it would be really tough to have that kinda lifestyle with little ones. Your partner would need to have a flexible job to make it work I think. |
Posted By: Mum_mum
Date Posted: 12 September 2010 at 7:54pm
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My father is a police officer and went to train when i was 10 so I wasn't a baby but still young. He had to go to the police college for 6 months only coming home at weekends which was pretty hard on us as Mum worked a lot as well but as we were a little older we could fend for ourselves and I had older siblings to help me out.
Being on shift work was pretty hard for him I think as some days he couldn't be there to pick us up from school, or he'd be sleeping during the day etc but again cos we were older it wasnt as bigger deal as if we were really little. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
 Angel baby - May 2008
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Posted By: tishy
Date Posted: 12 September 2010 at 7:55pm
| My sister is a cop (not in NZ) and has 2 kids. She has a desk job however. Also her DP is a teacher so regardless of her work hours they work the daycare arrangements around him, i.e. term time only. |
Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 12 September 2010 at 8:18pm
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My grandfather was a cop when my mum was a baby/little he did shift work like mentioned above and so he found he would do a shift say 10-6am and if he arrested any one that could drag the shift on for another few hours depending. But his shifts were rotating too so sometimes he'd have nights, sometimes day and that included weekends. My gran also worked but they lived with his mum so she did most of the raising of my mum. Hth. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Bexee
Date Posted: 12 September 2010 at 8:27pm
| I would LOVE to retrain. I went out with the police on Friday night for 6 hours working and came home so bubbly, so happy, and so alive. But by the sounds of things it's not really the time to do it with a 13 month old... |
Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 12 September 2010 at 8:45pm
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I know a few cops and one (male) lost his wife and kids due to the shift work (althou I believe there is more to the story). She hated the shift work and their boy didn't see much of his dad. There was someone on here that was looking into it at one stage. Personally myself I wouldn't do it with a young child. I was offered a posting to Afghanistain in 2008 and turned it down because of the boys. ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: MamaT
Date Posted: 12 September 2010 at 9:07pm
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I was really keen to get into the police, but I decided that it wasn't the type of career I could handle with a young family. My sisters ex-BF went through college and did a year on the street while they were together until they broke up a wee while ago. She found it incredibly difficult to deal with. He was working crazy hours, was exhausted on his off days and often bought home the stressors of his work to their relationship. He was threatened a few times from some gang members he arrested and they sat outside my sisters flat for a few days. -------------  
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Posted By: AzzaNZ
Date Posted: 13 September 2010 at 5:01pm
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DH is looking into joining. He was in the police before we moved to NZ and he works shifts in his current job so thats not a biggie. My issue is the time away at training college. I work long hours and we have no family support so dont know how I'd swing single parenthood for 6 months. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
http://intermittentblogger.wordpress.com |
Posted By: chrissysmith
Date Posted: 13 September 2010 at 7:40pm
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DH is a cop but we don't have any kids yet (TTC number one at the mo) but am very aware of the process as DH has only been a cop for a couple of years. To start out you have to be pretty dedicated to the training in order to get fitness up to standard (unless of course it already is) that generally will require daily running etc. Then comes the countless tests then once you have been accepted it's then 6 months away at Police College in Porirua (as everyone has already mentioned), even when DH came home for the weekend he spent most of his time studying! From there its shift work and that can be pretty rough. I sometimes feel like i barely see DH and end up spending alot of time at home alone or tip toeing around whilst he sleeps. There can also be alot of overtime with no pay (time off in lieu instead) and it is very antisocial hours, around 1 weekend off a month. But then in saying all of that DH LOVES his job and loves the variety that each day brings and if he ever got sick of frontline work then there are so many different options for him to look into. To get your name on the list i think they like you to attend a seminar kind of thing where they will be able to answer all of your questions as well.
Novel over  ------------- http://daisypath.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: HippyMama
Date Posted: 13 September 2010 at 10:09pm
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It's not something I'd do with a very young family. As mentioned the fitness requirements and recruitment process is intense - not to mention the training away from home, then the shift work. Would you consider non-sworn work with the police at all? I found it a huge eye opener - if you have any questions about it (and the recruitment process) feel free to PM me (have BTDT to an extent). ------------- Mama to two earth walkers & two angels. Remember, you are not managing an inconvenience; You are raising a human being. ~ Kittie Franz Next Slingbabies! Meet - Friday 4th May !! |
Posted By: HoneybunsMa
Date Posted: 14 September 2010 at 12:01am
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You'll probably find the shifts are much like the fire service which is 4days on 4off 2days then 2nights so you work into our first day off iygwim. Bro is a firefighter and he doesn't find it that hard going in terms of the shifts he still goes out playing bball, kayaking, and the like. I think it just depends on what sort of person you are if you can handle that.
I wouldnt do it with young kids, as you would miss out on so much but then again what is 6months in the scheme of things? Lots of parents in desk jobs would miss out on that time anyway as they could get up before kids wake up and then work a 10hr day and get home when the kids are asleep especially if you are commuting into town in Auck. If like the fireservice you can pick up OT then you would get an extra $300 before tax for one shift which is always a bonus. DP is a shiftworker, I'm a hospo widow which I'm used to have been most of our relationship so if he decided to do it I would be making sure he worked hard on his fitness before he even applied. I knew someone who applied with younger kids and they said that the written test was harder then fitness ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
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Posted By: tiptoes
Date Posted: 14 September 2010 at 8:39am
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My sister's ex-husband is a cop. It changed him a lot - he loves it but it didn't do their relationship any good. On the positive side with the whole 4 days on 4 days off he was actually able to spend that time with the kids and with all the time in lieu he got he took a big chunk of time off at point to fix up their house.
------------- http://alterna-tickers.com">  
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Posted By: kabe
Date Posted: 14 September 2010 at 9:25am
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My SIL is a cop and she has a 1 and 3 year old. She returned to work pt-time after each child turned one. I think it's different for her in that she's very experienced and had given up shift work and moved to being a community constable before getting pregnant. Her current job works really well with a family and if she wants to pick up extra hours she can.
------------- http://alterna-tickers.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Pipee
Date Posted: 17 September 2010 at 10:01am
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Hi, My DH is a police officer. Her went to college when DS was 7months old, I was only working the odd weekend at this stage so it was easy to deal with him on that side of things. I'm glad he went when he did, sure I missed him heaps (only got to see him 3x when he was away AND managed to conceive DD on one of those visits!) and he found it really hard to be away from us. But he was really busy while he was down there as the workload is massive so he was able to just crack on and get it done.
He has been in 4 years now and its only been over the last year or so that we have started to find the shift work quite hard esp with me working 2 days a week as well. We are lucky in that my Mum will take the children on my work days so childcare is not an issue, but it is hard not seeing him. But you manage. He loves his job and the there are big perks too like being able to take 7 weeks off at the moment to be at home with us while we have a new baby. I think it is a very personal choice and would very much depend on what your support would be like for you around your wee one. Most of the Mums that I know at DH's station had kids after they had been in for a while so they were able to come back on flexible employment options which means basically the same shift each week. PM if you want anymore help. ------------- http://alterna-tickers.com"> 
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