Issue at Daycare, or just me...??
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Topic: Issue at Daycare, or just me...??
Posted By: Nikki
Subject: Issue at Daycare, or just me...??
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 11:56am
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Hi guys,
I have a minor issue with the kids daycare and I'm not sure wheather I should menion it to them or not. Its not a huge deal, but has got to me a bit --- I don't really want to get off-side with them, as apart from this we're VERY happy with the daycare and have no intention of moving them etc. Below is a letter I've drafted. Would you email them .... leave it ... call her ....?? Am I over-reacting? Or do I have a point? Would it bother you? Thanks!!! Hi XXX, I have a small concern to discuss, so thought I would email you as it’s too much to write for the suggestion box and would take quite a while to explain in person. Around 6-8 weeks ago Jake came home on two occasions, about 2 weeks apart, saying that Sxx made him go outside and Sxx told him off and wouldn’t let him inside. After the second time I asked her about it as he had mentioned it all the way home and I was a bit worried on those really cold days that he was being forced to stay outside. My concern is that if children want to be inside that there are certain times of the day that they are not allowed (such as when we pick them up quite often they are all outside, and the door is even shut at times). Sxx assured me that they always have access to be inside apart from on the odd occasion that they are a teacher down (on breaks, when a teacher is with a sick child etc) but said that sometimes they do tell them to go outside like when they are all running around madly. So I was happy with the explanation. But when DH picked Jake up the other day, Jake was showing him something under where the blocks are, and Sue came in and YELLED at Jake “What are you doing in here? You know you are not allowed in here!” ... then saw DH! DH was very taken aback by this, and not too impressed at the way she spoke to Jake. I understand that children of this age can be frustrating and I certainly could not do her job, and even accept that there are times when you need to raise your voice to get them to listen, but is it acceptable and necessary to yell at a child for quietly playing with blocks inside?? (After she had assured me they were always allowed in apart from the ODD occasion). So what I would like to know …. Are there times of the day when the children are not allowed inside? And if so, why? It appears when we pick them up that most days (unless its later and they are in watching TV) that all the children and teachers are outside. If a child wants to be inside, can they? (And if so, why is Jake being yelled at to go outside?) In my opinion 2-3 year olds are still quite small so lose body heat faster than adults and this has been happening over winter when we have had some very cold and windy days. We have been asked to bring a raincoat, which is fine if they want to be outside, but I think if its cold and they have been outside playing with water/in the rain/ in the wind they should be able to be inside. I also think that by late afternoon if they are tired, not feeling well, wanting to do something quite away from the other kids (as daycare is a stimulating environment and some kids may not sleep so well there and are very tired by the end of the day), they should be able to. If you disagree, please let me know the rationale as to why? My intention is not to upset anyone or get off-side, I just would like to understand your policy and reasoning, as it doesn’t really make sense to me. I certainly wouldn’t force my kids outside at home if they didn’t want to go out. I do understand that fresh air and running around is good for them – but if they are very active normally I don’t see an issue with some quiet time when they feel like it. If you could give me a call this afternoon or tomorrow after 2pm that would be great. Cheers, Nikki ------------- DS (5yrs) and DD (3yrs) |
Replies:
Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 12:03pm
| Send it, the way Jake was yelled at would really get to me. All your asking for is a please explain |
Posted By: Raspberryjam
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 12:04pm
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Id be livid nikki - for any child to be out in the cold especially because its jake to be honest - he shoudl be kept warm to keep well and healthy as poss
I cant see any reason for some one to yell at my child either these people should be trained to deal with situations with out yelling at them ------------- http://lilypie.com] 
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Posted By: xLUCKYx
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 12:22pm
| I would definitly send it. You have written very well and your concerns are well explained but you are also not accusing them of anything but asking for an explanation. I don't think sending it would set you off side from anyone in any way. I hope you get the answers you deserve! |
Posted By: Mum2ET
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 12:26pm
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I would also send it. It seems a bit strange to have time when the kids are not allowed inside- I know at Ellas daycare they can decide themselves whether they want to play in and out and it would annoy me if Ella was shut outside, as she likes to play inside a lot of the time. The way you have worded the letter is very reasonable and the teacher shouldn't be yelling at Jake for playing quietly inside. ------------- Mum to Ella (5) and Tom (2) |
Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 12:31pm
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Send it. That's just silly imo... ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: KazS
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 12:33pm
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To be completely honest i expected to open this up and think you were over reacting (i read an overseas parents forum where the mothers over react big time) but i think you are spot on in addressing this and your email is very well worded!
Go for it and let us know how you get on! |
Posted By: jazzy
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 12:37pm
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What not allowed inside...how ridicules is that, too bad if they are a teacher down they should have enough staff to cover.
If that was my DH he would of had a go at them over that, wonder how often they yell at them...shocking. Good on you for addressing your issues, they are not small ones as you trust them with your child so any concerns you have you have the right to raise them. I am sure you will get an apology back but I would be inclined to do a few spot checks on them & I would ask them to advise you in the future if they are going to be short staffed meaning your child will have to stay outside. I would also ask to see a copy of their policies...put the heat on them a bit after all you want the best care they can give for your child & you pay them for that. |
Posted By: kellie
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 12:54pm
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Defintely send it. Seems really odd not letting them inside. And they should not be yelling at the kids. ------------- 
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Posted By: jaycee
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 1:03pm
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Wow - our creche is the oposit and has times when they don't let the children outside and never has a time when they HAVE to be outside. They have a roster of jobs and so someone is alway inside!
(btw - there is one place in the original post where you didn't xx out the name) -------------   
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Posted By: kiwisj
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 1:04pm
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Definitely not overreacting and I agree with everyone else, send it you have a right to want some answers/explanations and I think you have written your concerns out really well without being accusatory or anything. ------------- SJ Callum - Dec 2008 Daniel - Oct 2010 |
Posted By: amme_eilyk
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 1:13pm
| the yelling is a definite concern as well as the not being allowed inside. there are two major issues here for me. |
Posted By: james
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 1:15pm
yep deff send the e-mail and what do they wacth tv at this childcare james went to childcare from 8 months till he was 5 and he never saw a telly the whole time he was there ------------- <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b4.lilypie.com/nLJ5p13.png" alt="Lilypie 4th Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a> |
Posted By: SpecialK
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 1:49pm
Ditto, and I would def send it. You've worded the email really well. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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amme_eilyk wrote:Posted By: Nikki
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 2:17pm
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Wow - I expected to come back here and be told that if I'm happy with everything else then don't rock the boat! hehe. So its not just me. She is an older teacher and on a good day is awesome with the kids, but can have grumpy days too. I think dh was too in shock to say anything!
Woops re not xx-ing somewhere! hehe And I should say - this is not a cheap daycare, and they have staffing ratios well above the minimum!! My niece also spends just about all day inside at her dc. Just had lunch with a friend who told me to call, so the manager had to answer on the spot - which I thought was a good idea. The tv - its just some days with the over 2 year olds when it gets close to 5pm. I thought it was a little odd, but as hes only there 2-3 days/wk and not often that late I didn't worry about it. ------------- DS (5yrs) and DD (3yrs) |
Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 2:25pm
| Daniels daycare (this is only for the 3/4s) has tv on in the afternoon (usually a movie like toy story) if its been miserable all day and the kids haven't been able to get outside and they are all getting up to mischief. I've seen it on twice. |
Posted By: Nikki
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 3:26pm
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I have emailed. No call yet. Arrghhh, now I almost wish I hadn't! I don't want to be "that parent" that they all hate! ------------- DS (5yrs) and DD (3yrs) |
Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 3:35pm
yep me too. ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
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Posted By: Chickoin
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 3:43pm
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I am sure most of the staff there have had experience with "those parents" who can't be pleased, you definitley not one of them.
I think the way you have handled the situation is perfectly. The director needs to know what is going on in the centre and how parents feel about it. I am sure it is different over here due to the glorious weather, but all children are to be either inside or outside, they get no choice. But if it is yucky weather they will stay inside. Only the pre kindy children (2.5 - 3.5yrs) have the choice to go inside alone just to use the toilet. They use the tv rarely, just if it has been bad weather and it's nearing the end of the day and there are still a lot of children waiting to be picked up. The kindy children (3.5 - 5/6yrs) have cartoons on after lunch for an hour or two since they don't nap like the other rooms, just to give them some still/quiet time. Sorry, I am totally rambling on, I just find it interesting what other centres do  -------------   
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Posted By: flakesitchyfeet
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 3:46pm
Don't worry. You are being very reasonable and rational, and I'm sure centre management will appreciate the way you have handled it, and also appreciate that teachers behavior being brought to their attention, in regards to the yelling. You couldn't be less confrontational if you tried! If not, I'd be questioning more than that teachers behavior. -------------  http://lilypie.com"> |
Posted By: flakesitchyfeet
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 3:51pm
I'd be cautious of this, while they should be able to answer you on the spot, they may want to talk to the teacher in question about the matter as well first, and come back to you with a full explaination/plan of action, as well as answering your questions. If you catch them when they are rushed/super busy, you may find they'll just rush their answer back, which could be upsetting, and it becomes mountain from molehill stuff. Maybe - IMHO. I'd stick with the written complaint, and then turn up randomly and watch whats happening, to give you more of a feel of what the vibe is really like. Also, a written complaint is more likely to demand a written response, which can then be used as amour if the matter isn't resolved as expected, or if policies aren't being adhered to. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> |
Posted By: Hopes
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 5:07pm
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Yea, I like writing better for things like that - it's so easy to blurt out something that sounds wrong in person, and you'll probably get a better, more thought-out response this way. I wouldn't expect an answer straight away, they'll want to chat to the teacher and give it a bit of thought, but I'd expect on over the next few days. -------------   
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Posted By: 4thtymlucky
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 5:19pm
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My vote is in..send the letter honey...a phone call won't give it justice although it will make them panic and put you on hold while they get the other side of the story..the upside about sending your letter is that it's written and therefore formal which means they need to address it formally and take your concern seriously because who knows how many other parents there are at your daycare who feel the same way but are unsure of how to go to about it...do it girl..for all the parents who don't know how to...can't wait for the outcome
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Posted By: Nikki
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 7:47pm
Well they haven't called this afternoon or emailed back ... so I'll see if she calls "after 2pm tomorrow" as requested. Will let you all know what happens! the kids don't go back til next tues now, so we won't have to face them til then at least!! eeek!  ------------- DS (5yrs) and DD (3yrs) |
Posted By: M2K
Date Posted: 16 September 2010 at 8:02pm
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Im pretty sure they have dealt with worse! If I paid for daycare and I walked in on one of them yelling at Keira, I would be p!ssed and would probably lash out. If they did ignore your email then it shows what kind of place they run really, hopefully you have a good outcome at the end of it all, poor wee Jake ------------- 
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Posted By: jazzy
Date Posted: 17 September 2010 at 2:07pm
| Have they contacted you yet? At lease they could of emailed you to say they will inverstergate & get back to you... |
Posted By: Nikki
Date Posted: 17 September 2010 at 8:41pm
No!! I'm wondering if the manager was not there, as DH didn't see her yesterday and shes usually quick to respond. I was waiting all afternoon for the call!  ------------- DS (5yrs) and DD (3yrs) |
Posted By: My3Sons
Date Posted: 18 September 2010 at 8:45am
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good on you for sending it, I think it was very well worded and you put your concerns forward well ------------- Mum to Mr 10, Mr 6 and Mr 4 
 
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The yelling thing is not cool at all! I would be interested to hear their reasoning for the not being allowed inside as well, sounds really strange to me! Hope you hear back on Monday, and do update us!Posted By: MrsMc
Date Posted: 18 September 2010 at 12:06pm
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im an ece teacher and to be honest i dont think there should be any time where the children are being yelled at.
Yes there are times where you need to raise your voice a little to get a childs attention, but they should not really be yelling |
Posted By: Nikki
Date Posted: 18 September 2010 at 12:07pm
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Just realised I'm in a course mon and tues, so won't be able to take calls most of the day ..... I will update though in the evening. ------------- DS (5yrs) and DD (3yrs) |
Posted By: newmum
Date Posted: 23 September 2010 at 9:22pm
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Just found this thread and I agree you did the right thing writing the letter. it was a great letter!
Have you heard anything?? ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: crafty1
Date Posted: 24 September 2010 at 2:03pm
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i agree with mrsmc that they shouldn't be yelling at the kids - thats for parents to do hehe
You can tell kids off without yelling. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: myonlineself
Date Posted: 25 September 2010 at 10:17am
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have you heard anything? I'd be very interested to know the explanation... ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Brilee
Date Posted: 26 September 2010 at 2:17pm
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Hi Nikki
I have worked in an ece centre and i left because of a major problem i had with the way certain teachers were behaving and treating certain children. I did bring this up with management they stonewalled me and when i handed in my regisgnation was made to sign a confidentionatley (sp) contract hmm i wonder why?I think by writing this email you have taken the first step but I would like to strongly advise you to follow it up and stand up for your child. There is no reason why a child should not be allowed inside at anytime. There is also no excuss for yelling. That is some bad teaching right there! ECE Rule no1 get down to their eye level and speak calmly and slowly, Good luck it is great you are asking questions I would too  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: pikelets
Date Posted: 26 September 2010 at 3:08pm
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We had problems with DS's first daycare. We could see things happening we didn't like and also heard things from other parents. If you got off-side of the manager, she was a real B**h, luckily that didn't happen to us but did to others. I know of now 6 other families who hated the place and changed DC's.
Anyway, after learning about the 6th family, I emailed ERO my concerns, however, they asked me to write a letter to the manager and would be interested in their response. As we had already left the DC and we had minor issues (unlike others who had major), I felt it was too late to then write a letter. I praise you for doing so and I hope things improve. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
 3 Angels - Dec10 / Mar11 / Dec11
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