For those who live vicariously...
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Category: General Chat
Forum Name: General Chat
Forum Description: For mums, dads, parents-to-be, grandparents, friends -- you name it! And you name the topic you want to chat about!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=3775
Printed Date: 07 October 2025 at 7:35am
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Topic: For those who live vicariously...
Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Subject: For those who live vicariously...
Date Posted: 17 September 2006 at 3:07pm
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OK. My life has had major upheaval in the last half an hour.
My friend Ross came down from Auckland the other weekend. I've known him for about 6 years, but haven't seen him in about 5. We had heeeeaps of fun. Loved hanging out and he thought Han was pretty cool. Since he has gone back, we've been talking, and somehow he decided that I should move to Auckland with Hannah to be with him. At first I thought he was crazy. Actually still do. But he said that he was coming back down for work on November 21st and would prove me wrong (in my disbelief). Now I've started to come round to the idea. Am I insane???? I told him it wouldn't be for atleast a year, once I've finished my degree. As I was planning to go and find a job and save to go overseas anyway, nothing pinning me to Wellington in particular (apart from the friends I have made, seeing as I haven't lived this long in a town since Rotorua). So I might be moving to Auckland at the end of next year to start a relationship with a guy I haven't hung out with for 5 years!!!!! WTF?!?! |
Replies:
Posted By: daikini
Date Posted: 17 September 2006 at 3:15pm
 ------------- Becca, mum of 2 girls & 3 boys |
Posted By: jax
Date Posted: 17 September 2006 at 3:50pm
All I can say is, do what makes you happy  ------------- Jacquie - Mama to Erin, 13.07.06 - Chief Cat Chaser & Marmite Sammie Eater 
Love many, trust few, harm none. ~Anon~ |
Posted By: james
Date Posted: 17 September 2006 at 3:50pm
gotta agree but if it feels right nikki i say go for it lifes to short ------------- <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b4.lilypie.com/nLJ5p13.png" alt="Lilypie 4th Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a> |
Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 17 September 2006 at 3:56pm
| Thanks for the update Nikki (that was for me right?!!) Considering you've said it will be a year before you move, you have plenty of time to mull things over and make up your mind. and if all fails, you can stay with Roksana (!!!) |
Posted By: miss
Date Posted: 17 September 2006 at 4:14pm
| Nikki, the best relationships are often with someone who is a great friend first. If he has been wiating for this opportunity, and is prepared to wait that bit longer for your studying to be finished, then why not go for it. |
Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 17 September 2006 at 4:26pm
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definately, i go with the others.. you have a year or so so mull it all over and sort it out.. and friends first is always good.. I think it helps cos you don't tend to hide things from friends like you sometimes do with new b/f's.. you're honest from the start. ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja 
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Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 17 September 2006 at 5:48pm
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haha Yeah, it is all a bit insane but the saving grace for the plan is that it is a year away... and plenty of time to back out when I see him next.
It was just a little out of the blue when he started talking about it. And after feeling like a dick for my relationship with Zeke (being in love with being in love rather than with him), I don't quite trust my feelings at the moment. So yeah... time is good. It's all a bit flaky though. I mean, breaking up with one guy and then a month or two later thinking about moving to the other end of the island for another...?!?! I'm not usually this bad. I promise. (Well... maybe I am  )
Going to take it slow anyway... not decide that I'm going to marry the guy within 6 months like I did with Zeke (Poor man). |
Posted By: Guests
Date Posted: 17 September 2006 at 6:15pm
All i will say is follow ur gut and not ur heart coz the heart wants what the head wants and the gut always knows  If u know what i mean lol
But awesome stuff!! |
Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 17 September 2006 at 6:41pm
Ah that's brillo Jess. I've been trying to figure out what head and heart want but gut is what I should be going with! 
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Posted By: Guests
Date Posted: 17 September 2006 at 8:04pm
| My gut always wants chocolate haha |
Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 17 September 2006 at 8:05pm
| Mmmmm chocolate. I know Mum left some here somewhere. |
Posted By: aimeejoy
Date Posted: 17 September 2006 at 8:59pm
A year is ages to decide either way Nikki... Chocolate sounds like the best idea tho!  ------------- Aimee Hannah 22/10/05 Greer 11/02/08 |
Posted By: my2angels
Date Posted: 17 September 2006 at 10:48pm
| I think it sounds exciting and scary at the same time but what have you got to lose if you havent really got that much tying you to where you are now. If you dont like it then its an experience and its not like you are dropping everything and taking off with some random guy you meet on the net or anything. Good luck if you decide to go! |
Posted By: AlyAyde
Date Posted: 18 September 2006 at 7:50am
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lol, I think its great!! Hell, you wont know if you dont try right. And you have got a year to think about it. BTW must have been SOME weekend ------------- Jayde 25/12/04 Alyssa 08/04/03 http://Alyayde.bebo.com |
Posted By: newmum
Date Posted: 18 September 2006 at 8:00am
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I say go for it!! LOL, It's a year away anyway so you have heaps of time to try and talk yourself out (or in) to it!! I say if it feels right, do it. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: AlyAyde
Date Posted: 18 September 2006 at 8:51am
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lol id say it must have felt VERY right. ROFL ------------- Jayde 25/12/04 Alyssa 08/04/03 http://Alyayde.bebo.com |
Posted By: newmum
Date Posted: 18 September 2006 at 12:22pm
ROFL   ------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 18 September 2006 at 1:02pm
| mARIA! frankly I'm shocked! |
Posted By: Bombshell
Date Posted: 18 September 2006 at 1:29pm
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Get to know him again, spend some time together in both cities - thats what weekends are for and see what happens....who knows and go into with a what will be attitude and you will be fine...
Keep us posted!!!
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Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 18 September 2006 at 1:48pm
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Bugger that it won't be happening for another year - I could do with some help with these gremlins
Seriously tho, like everyone else said, do what feels right. I moved in with Willie the day after we met and everyone said I was crazy, and yes it hasn't been all roses, but 7 years later we're still here and I have no regrets. But like Maria said, it must have been SOME weekend! -------------  Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 18 September 2006 at 8:17pm
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at you both Maria and Emma!!!
That's what is weird... NOTHING HAPPENED. (I just must be a fantastically cool chick. Hrmm.)
But now when he comes down next there is some sort of expectation for something to happen (not THAT!) It's a little bit scary! |
Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 18 September 2006 at 8:17pm
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And Emma, I'll be up to deal with them when they hit one... that's when it gets toughest anyway right? By then you'll be more than ready for someone to help
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Posted By: Jennz
Date Posted: 19 September 2006 at 12:49am
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Talk to Amy!!!! She has been through this almost EXACT situation so she'll know what you are going through ------------- Jen, Charlotte 7 & Kate 3 
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Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 19 September 2006 at 9:06am
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I only wanna talk to Amy if it turned out to be a huge success and she is now married and pregnant with her third child, only after having established a highly successful career which she is planning on returning to once her children are old enough.
And as far as I know she hates men as much as me!
Nah, I will talk to her. |
Posted By: Jennz
Date Posted: 20 September 2006 at 2:29am
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Hmmmm ok- um yeah thats what happened...
But honestly, it will give you the inside scoop from someone who followed their heart. ------------- Jen, Charlotte 7 & Kate 3
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Posted By: Rachael21
Date Posted: 22 September 2006 at 11:17pm
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This is my philosophy it might not be for you but its what i like to believe:
Everything happens for a reason, if you are having a hard time making a choice what you choose isn't important because obvously both options are just as good or you wouldn't be having a hard time deciding. It doesn't matter what you choose just as long as you make a choice. You will choose the right thing just have faith. Good luck Nikki it will be so fun. BTW me and Ben were friends for a couple of years and then one day we moved to Nelson away from everyone else and got together. It was the best thing I ever did and now we are still together and with Jack
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Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 23 September 2006 at 7:02am
| Lewis and I were friends for...3 years before getting together. moved in after three weeks, and were planning our trip to Japan after a year together. |
Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 24 September 2006 at 10:16am
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I'm getting over the plan anyway. I think I was just so into it because it was a distraction from school work!!! hehehehe
We'll see in a year. |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 24 September 2006 at 10:18am
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Are you getting boring in your old age, or is this just sensible mother thoughts kicking in ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
|
Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 24 September 2006 at 10:27am
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Both.
I realised that Ross has absolutely no concept of what it would be like living with a child. And a mother who most of the time, just wants to sleep. Especially when his job is pretty much hanging out with bands and drinking. Argh. I'm so borrrriiiinnnnggggggg! |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 24 September 2006 at 4:11pm
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Welcome to the club! I am such a nana... ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
|
Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 24 September 2006 at 4:59pm
| i went to bed at 8:30 the other night. Out-Nana THAT! |
Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 24 September 2006 at 7:28pm
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was thinking about bed at 6.30 after JJ went down, AND had a 2 hour afternoon nap..... am often in bed before 8, sleeping too, none of that rudies stuff for this nana ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 24 September 2006 at 8:10pm
| Yeah, but you have a pregnancy-hormones excuse. You are "creating life". I, on the other hand, and getting ooooollllllllldddddd |
Posted By: aimeejoy
Date Posted: 24 September 2006 at 8:24pm
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I'm in bed now! Sad isn't it... ------------- Aimee Hannah 22/10/05 Greer 11/02/08 |
Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 11 October 2006 at 5:36pm
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Ahem... update.
Ross invited me to his family bach thing in Pukawa last weekend (essay due on Friday) and said that he'd look after Hannah and cook etc so I could concentrate on study. HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA It didn't happen because his dad got the dates wrong and someone was using the house... but how funny is it that he said he'd a) cook and b) look after hannah and c) both at once. The man seriously has no clue. But it was a nice gesture. However deluded. Might be going this weekend instead... no essay due in so I'll actually be able to relax. Altho it also depends on whether his dad is going this weekend. I might just crash the party anyway. I think I need a weekend away!
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Posted By: caraMel
Date Posted: 11 October 2006 at 5:39pm
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Oooh Pukawa is great Nikki! My Aunty and uncle have a bach there. Its such a great place to go and relax, hope you have a great weekend! ------------- Mel, Mummy to E: 6, B: 4 and: 
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Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 11 October 2006 at 6:39pm
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He clearly has no experience with children, hence volunteering to look after the almost-two year old.
I say exploit his naivety while you have the chance  ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
|
Posted By: AlyAyde
Date Posted: 11 October 2006 at 6:53pm
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lol, I reckon you should ask if he can look after Hannah while you go out shopping or have a nice quiet sit down lunch to yourself. What a lovely guy! If you do go this weekend have fun. ------------- Jayde 25/12/04 Alyssa 08/04/03 http://Alyayde.bebo.com |
Posted By: james
Date Posted: 11 October 2006 at 6:57pm
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i,m, with emma and angelnz get him to look after hannah while you rest and recope have heaps of fun if you do go this weekend ------------- <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b4.lilypie.com/nLJ5p13.png" alt="Lilypie 4th Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a> |
Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 11 October 2006 at 7:32pm
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Nikki I'd just say, if you're meant to spend the rest of your life with him then you've got ages to decide. I agree with the be friends first advice you've got already. And be careful at least for Hannah's sake, because if it doesn't work out she'll be old enough to remember.
That sounds kind of negative, but I honestly do hope it works out, he sounds like a nice guy. ------------- |
Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 11 October 2006 at 7:36pm
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oooohhh rudies... ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: my2angels
Date Posted: 11 October 2006 at 8:33pm
| hehe yeah but his dad might be in the next room, thats just wrong!!!! (dont listen to me, im just jealous) |
Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 11 October 2006 at 8:38pm
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hahahaha
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Posted By: Roksana
Date Posted: 12 October 2006 at 10:26am
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Ok I have no idea how I missed this post earlier.....I spend enough time on here to have noticed but oh well.
Re Liz's comment...you can come and live with me Nikki but I dont know how two scorpio kids will cope ...LOL You know because it is out of the blue and because he is a friend...its meant to be??? How exciting!!! I hope it works out....my question tho is...are you attracted to him as a partner or do you think of him as a friend...it might be a bit confusing. But I will be happy to have you in AKL.... Any one else wanna convert from WNG to AKL??? ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 12 October 2006 at 7:43pm
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or form anywhere to lovely clean safe warm Blenners... (if it would help sway you, we are putting in an inground swimming pool for next summer..) ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 13 October 2006 at 1:56pm
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Roksana - don't know at this stage. I kinda just always wondered if there was something there but never considered it an actual possibility.
Anyway. Not going to Pukawa. (and I was soooo looking forward to getting away from the house!!!) His step-mother's sister is going there. 
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