Kids and nudity
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Topic: Kids and nudity
Posted By: Bizzy
Subject: Kids and nudity
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 11:35am
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Caught a bit of the Tyra show today and they were discussing being naked in front of your children. I was amazed at the women who had never been naked around their children, no matter what age. and at the other end of the spectrum there was the women who still showered with her 14 year old daughter...
there was also the women who didnt like her children to be naked around her - she couldnt see why a child would need to have no clothes on, even if in the bathroom by herself. What do you think about your kids seeing you naked and when does it stop being appropriate in your mind? ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
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Replies:
Posted By: AandCsmum
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 11:41am
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It stops being appropriate when they or you feel uncomfortable with it.
Both the toddlers here were nude in the pool at 9am, couldn't stop them! Boy & Girl, were having fun playing in water, no issue with being naked. I still shower with my 7yo, I don't shower with the 2yo cause he likes to poke your backside, he thinks it's hilarious, me not so much lol, still jump in the bath with them occasionally too. ------------- Kel http://lilypie.com"> 
A = 01.02.04 & C = 16.01.09 & G = 30.03.12 |
Posted By: pudgy
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 11:44am
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We have no problem being naked in front our children and no problem with them being naked. They hate clothes lol
There is nothing wrong with having your nudey on ( to quote DD  ) Especially in this heat.
When the kids start to get uncomfortable with being naked I guess that's when it would stop. That poor child Bizzy never being able to run around nudey 
ETA If your 14 year old was still comfortable showering with you that's cool. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Hopes
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 11:45am
I like that. Although I suppose there's a point where even if you're both comfortable with it it's not cool - to me showering with the 14-y-o probably falls in that one!! And as for never being nude round your kids ever, I couldn't cope without being able to pop Jacob in his jolly jumper in the bathroom door while I have my shower! I figure it wasn't all THAT long ago he was getting up close and personal with everything in the process of being born, and he still has my boobies for lunch, it's GOT to be cool -------------   
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AandCsmum wrote:Posted By: TheKelly
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 12:08pm
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I agree with what Kel said,"it stops being appropriate when they are you feel uncomfortable with it " Good way to put it.
Im naked around Ty all the time (well not ALL the time, I do wear clothes too you know) and I used to be naked around C a lot and vice versa,but lately shes becoming a lot more modest about us seeing her naked (thinks/hopes shes getting breasts,or starting to,bless her dreaming heart) so we give her her privacy ,and when I happen to be getting changed in front of her she often comments on my sizeable butt,or my saggy breasts,so I give the little darling privacy from me too.... ------------- 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: rorylex
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 12:31pm
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I dont care if my kids want to run around naked they do it all the time. my oldest gets home from school and promptly throws his clothes off.
I also dont care about naked infront of them, if they decide they dont like it then ill wont. as for the 14yr old girl, i dont know why she should still be needing to shower with an adult. ------------- Mummy to 4 boys Samuel - 18.6.05 Rory - 15.7.06 Mason - 13.06.08 Emmett - 24.01.10 Baby #5 - cooking |
Posted By: Babykatnz
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 12:51pm
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DP and I dont 'hide' from the kids (bit hard when we sleep with nothing on in this heat, and they dont wait around for us to get dressed when they want to get up lol), but B is getting to an age where he is more curious about 'differences' and looks for the point of looking so I have started letting the kids have seperate baths, and giving him privacy to change etc ------------- Brandon - 05/12/2003  
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 12:52pm
Our daughter is only a baby and I'm frequently naked with her, either showering or getting dressed. We're not nudists don't wander around the house naked - too close to the neighbours. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">   [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: yermasyada
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 1:20pm
No nudey issues here 
re: the 14yr old girl, I don't see any problem with that it they're both OK with it. Sometimes it's just easier to jump in the shower together 
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Posted By: princesspumpkin
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 1:51pm
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I noticed the different cultural perspectives on being nude when I lived in Korea - I visited public bath houses a lot, and everyone's just wandering around naked, no worries at all - adults & kids (gender segregated though!). When I first started going, a little girl was looking at me sneakily, but was just curious about why my body was different to the Korean women's bodies (big boobs, curves, that sorta thing!). They found it hard to understand why we westerners were uncomfortable at first - 'it's just a body!'.
We'll always try to be okay with bodies around here, my family really were not & it doesn't lead to healthy attitudes about nudity...I take baths with DS, we sleep nakey most of the time & don't get dressed before he comes barrelling in at 6am, and it's not an issue. Once he gets bigger we'll teach him that it's not okay to run round nakey all the time, but there's nothing wrong with it at the right times! 
I remember seeing Kate Winslet on telly once talking about taking baths with her 8 year old daughter, and saying it was a great way for her to teach her little girl that all bodies are lovely, even ones with saggy mummy tummies & breasts
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Posted By: Chickoin
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 2:20pm
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DH is a little uncomfortable being nudey infront of DD, but only because she points and yells "willy!!!" with great excitement lol.
She often comments (loudly and delightfully) when she sees my 'gina' or 'boobies' but I try not to make a big deal about it. They are reletively new words she has learnt, along with 'elbow' 'armpit' etc. No big deal. I am curious as to what the story is behind the lady showing with her 14yo. Like is it just a daily thing they have always done? I also wonder how big the shower is. Mum and I would see each other nude when I was a teen, but showering together? -------------   
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Posted By: jazzy
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 2:21pm
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DH could not care less about walking around naked, unless he thinks the neighbours could see him, we have heaps of windows lol. He has baths with the boys now & then (when they spring him in it) although he can not get as many in the bath as he used too. They love it as he is a captive audience.
I think I am at that stage where I don't like being naked around them. DS1 has just turned 10yrs & I think he is curious, I have to keep telling him to knock before opening doors. DS2 who is 6yrs has always had a big mouth...why is your tummy so big, what that, & so on, does nothing for my self confidence & DS3 follows DS2 lead. We are fine with them running around naked although we get DS1 to put togs on now before going in the pool, I think he is at that age where he should now. I have noticed DS3 likes his privacy when getting changed if other people are around. At kindy he went down the slide & it was wet so I had to change him & he wanted to go somewhere to hide & do it & same at home if people are over he goes "don't ook" Funny how they all like the toilet door shut & always come pounding on it when I am in there...guess that does not count
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Posted By: tishy
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 2:32pm
This is the same for BIL in Japan. There they find it unusual that we don't see our parents nude. As long as everyone is comfortable is how we do it in our house too. Already at 3yo, A doesn't like cuddles with DH is he doesn't have a top on. She is quite the naturalist herself and will strip off at an chance at home. E on the other hand likes to have her clothes on and doesn't feel complete unless she's fully dressed (no shorts/skirts for her just long trousers!) |
Posted By: newme
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 3:50pm
She said that she is so busy doing household things that sometimes it works out that they both shower at the same time. She helps her wash her hair etc. It didn't seem like a big deal, and it wasn't like a 'special' time for them. It was just practical. I don't have any problem with nudity as long as everyone is comfortable with it. I have wondered when that will happen though. DS1 is turning 3 tomorrow and I am very regularly naked around him. And he sees my boobs all the time when I breastfeed DS2 too. I am not, however, comfortable being naked around anyone besides DH and my kids. I mean, if I am getting changed to go swimming that is okay, but I wouldn't strip off in front of my friends or anything. |
Posted By: ElfsMum
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 3:54pm
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sorry havent got a chance to read replies..but i have no problem with being naked around them or them being naked around me though Ethan does tend to say boobies and try to touch but we just talk about that .. i do prefer he has undies on though when around the house..nothign to do with nudity..just more the way it is really..just prefer him having undies on where people sit etc lol:) but yeah no problem with it..but i was raised like that too whereas my Dh is a little more funny bout it cause he was raised with no nudity..
showering together once they can shower themselves is weird.. ------------- Mum to two amazing boys! |
Posted By: Aquarius
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 4:40pm
This is the same for BIL in Japan. There they find it unusual that we don't see our parents nude. do you mean that they are liberal in japan also???i dont think so....that is definately not true. i dont make a habit of being naked in front of my kids..neither does DH...if they walk in to the bathroom..well that may be the only appropriate time but they are yelled to get out!!!! i do have a house of boys though that may be why. DH will shower in the bathroon while youngsters are in the bath no worries...but not me modesty people!!!! ------------- http://www.magicalkingdoms.com/timers/"> 
mum to mr 16 & mr 10 |
Posted By: Mucky_Tiger
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 4:58pm
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im 21...
i still occasionally see my mum nude. doesnt bother me, im a caregiver as a job so its another person, and she's family - she had surgery on her elbow so i would help her wash herself and dry her after shower. wheras i have no memories of ever seeing my dad nude, i dont ever remember even showering with him as a kiddie. and last year i had quite a few health issues so mum got to see me 'indisposed' a few times then and i dont have a problem with it. we've got the same parts |
Posted By: kiwisj
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 5:11pm
It is definitely true that in japan it's 100% nude in public baths (onsen). Probably not so much around town though
I grew up in a home where nudity was definitely ok. We used to camp at mapua, near Nelson, which is still clothes-optional part of the year and only stopped going when I was about 8 or so because mum thought it might make me uncomfortable (seeing other ppl, I think). My parents slept nude and walked to the bathroom nude till I left home.. Not sure what they do now, I haven't asked! We are pretty relaxed here too, slept in nothing or very little because of the heat and certainly don't cover up when Callum comes in to say good morning. He is around a lot when I'm feeding daniel which is perfectly normal! Whoever said "it's just a body" - so true!! ------------- SJ Callum - Dec 2008 Daniel - Oct 2010 |
Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 5:53pm
I'd agree. lived in Japan for many years and the onsen and gyms people run around naked....quite literally. In public however, many are much more conservative with their clothing. |
Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 6:52pm
I don't know why but from a young age I had an idea that 'Sex' was 'bad' and recall my mum spelling 'sex' on a game of scrabble and I got quite upset and told my grandma (her mum) about it. 
Anyway, I agree with the - when either of you feels uncomfortable. My mum or grandparents used to bath me when I was little and I started to feel uncomfortable about age 7-8 (about when puberty hit and things started changing, hair started growing...). To this day my mum will walk in the bathroom while I'm showering or in the bath with Lily and I'm fine with that. I also walk into the bathroom whilst she is showering (to wash my hands or brush my teeth for example) and we're both fine with that. I wouldn't let my granddad walk in though... I bath with DD about 99% of the time, I mainly bath her and DP has a shower at the same time... I will probably wait until she tells me she's too big to be bathing with me, have me bathing her etc like I did. For now she loves being nude and crawling around or sitting around nude after a bath so no issues there! I am happy for her to see me naked and ask questions about why we're different, I don't recall doing this with my mum and often just went to my friends to ask but I'd rather she asked me - than friends! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Whateversville
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 7:09pm
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I'm 24 and still see my mum nude. I go in her room and talk while she gets dressed etc and she does to me too. She sometimes even comes in the bathroom to tell me something while I'm showering or having a bath.
Plus when DS was little and we bathed together mum would help me by taking DS so therefor saw me nude. BUT I do rememeber having nicknames for my vagina as a kid (front bum, bottom,etc), and it was my friends mum who taught me to call it my fanny. And I've always had boobs. I guess it's what mum always called them I don't remember ever seing dad nude. But he walks around in his undies often enough lol. DS sees me nude all the time. Kind of can't help it when I need to shower so I put him in the bathroom with me or when I get dressed. He sees my breasts multipul times a day
DS likes to be nuddy too, and thats fine, he's a child but if at 14 he still wants to sit in my lounge nude I'm not sure how I'd feel about that lol. |
Posted By: Aquarius
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 7:14pm
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yeah you guys are possibly right about the bath houses BUT i was more referring to home life and bringing up baby.
my brother has been married to a japenese lady now for..years and lives over there. i have been there and they have been here alot. they have two kids now and things are done very privately here AND there. they bath very privately at home (showering before bath) and found it odd for me to suggest doing kids together(very kiwi apparently) nudity is not embraced or encouraged in the home unless of course bathing and changing which is obviously needed. but there is none of this ' mum and dad waking up and walking around naked bullsh*t....get dressed (even just underwear is okay)!!!kids shouldnt need to get to the stage of feeling uncomfortable.... washing, yes..getting dressed, yes...toddlers running around, yes.......cant think of much more thats acceptable. am i a prude???? hahaha dont jump down my throat either...i cant be bothered arguing...im just giving my opinion. ------------- http://www.magicalkingdoms.com/timers/">
mum to mr 16 & mr 10 |
Posted By: Aquarius
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 7:15pm
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ps....when people are sick or disabled thats totally different ------------- http://www.magicalkingdoms.com/timers/">
mum to mr 16 & mr 10 |
Posted By: countingdown
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 7:19pm
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You obviously have very strong feelings on the subject.... ------------- <a href="http://pregnancy.baby-gaga.com/"><img src="http://tickers.baby-gaga.com/p/dev065pr___.png" alt="pregnancy calendar" border="0" /></a> |
Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 7:41pm
Haven't read you other post but having been to Japan a couple of times and staying with a homestay I very much learned that quickly! I chose to wear boxers to bed which was kinda frowned upon when I came to the breakfast table in my pjs! Oops! ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Raspberryjam
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 7:41pm
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I dont mind if my girls see me naked, ,my big girl is pointing out my 'boobies' cause Im breastfeeding, and she has started pointing out her baby sisters too. I think she likes that we are the same
DH tends to be quite quick about chucking clothes on etc , cause she has started to look, we dont think now is a good age to discuss this subject - she is likely to announce it somewhere very inappropriate DH has never showered or bathed with our babies, not that it was an issue he just hasnt, but I wouldnt like him to shower with our eldest now, shes almost as tall as his 'hip' I dont when any thing like this should stop - but 14 is too old for showering - I think modesty is a good thing to teach - cant have them showing there good bits around - they need to learn boundaries - even if it is your folks ------------- http://lilypie.com] 
http://lilypie.com] 
http://lilypie.com] 
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Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 8:07pm
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We don't make it a habit to be 'caught' naked. Somedays it feels like showering, getting dressed and toileting are my only self times!! The girls have seen us naked but they stare
I expect them to romp around dressed. In the pool they all wear togs, it's best when the sun is intense anyhow. And I only let them have their tops off if they're preschoolers (or boys....lol). Kelly, by age 10 I was convinced I was growing breasts too. Oh, they take a long time for a 10yo! -------------  |
Posted By: Chickoin
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 8:09pm
Haha, my parents took me there during 'clothing optional season', I think I would have been about 6 or 7. I remember suddenly noticing that people were naked. I have a clear memory of watching 2 men playing tennis with their bits wangling about. That was a little disturbing, any older and I would have been scarred for life  -------------
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Posted By: Shezamumof3
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 8:09pm
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I dont have a prob with my kids seeing me nude, they are only 2.5 and 17 months and DH is the same. Though they now have started asking "whats that mummy" lol. I have no idea when I wont want them to see me naked..
Cant say id ever want to see my mum naked LOL! ------------- |
Posted By: Plushie
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 8:25pm
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I only think its inappropriate when its little kids in the nake at a very public beach or something, just because you don't know who's looking.
I would be extremely uncomfortable showering with my 14yo but if mom and daughter are cool with it then thats all good! I will have to work on my naked shyness as i don't want baby to have the same hangups i do. I can't even pee if someone is nearby and turn the taps on full even at home and despite being with my ex for years i still never showered with him or walked from bed to bathroom naked, or stripped off in front of him i'd make him close his eyes or take a sheet with me. That, IMO, is not normal and don't want to raise a repressed child! |
Posted By: peanut butter
Date Posted: 22 February 2011 at 9:59am
| I have no problems with it either...but I do think you guys are brave with the nakey sleeping. Pre kids we did all the time (except winter)...nowadays with little ones climbing in during the night I worry about a toe getting stuck somewhere or a nipple getting squeezed so I mainly were PJs for "safety"..not modesty. LOL |
Posted By: james
Date Posted: 22 February 2011 at 11:22am
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I remeber being about 4 or 5 and talking to my dad while he was in the bath all i did was ask what was floting in the bath lol and it was the last time i was allowed in the bath with dad. W ith James and Hemi we are pretty non plused about nudeity the boys love being nakey and have only just started wee togs at the beach on hot days but at home i dont get a chacse to hide it will stop as soon as he or we get abbrassed ------------- <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b4.lilypie.com/nLJ5p13.png" alt="Lilypie 4th Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a> |
Posted By: MamaT
Date Posted: 22 February 2011 at 4:31pm
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I agree with what A&C'sMum said.
I was bought up in a family where it wasn't normal to wander around nude, but it certainly wasn't frowned upon if you did (helped that we were in the country). Even now I happily wander on in to the bathroom at my Sisters or my Mum's house if she is in the shower or going to the toilet, I don't see a problem with it at all and am often naked at home and will only change that if DS starts making a fuss about it. DH and I both shower with DS or are nude in front of him and again that won't change until he starts feeling uncomfortable. I hope that this means he won't grow up with any body issues, however each person is different and even those in the same family bought up in the same way can have different reactions. My sister for instance has always been very self-conscious about her body, whereas I haven't always been rather body confident. -------------  
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Posted By: QTMum
Date Posted: 22 February 2011 at 10:10pm
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DS still jusmps in the bath every now and again with me or Dh and I'm not fussed about getting dressed in front of him. He is nearly 5 so I can't see it going on for much longer but we'll see how we go.
DS is best mates with the little girl next door who is a couple of months older. They kept getting nude when they were playing together. I wasn't too fussed about it but her parents were really freaked out and made a huge deal out of it like they were about to start having sex or something. It actually bothered me I felt like they were calling my 4 year old a perv. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: LG
Date Posted: 23 February 2011 at 1:53pm
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I just got a growling from my SIL about this a couple of weeks ago. K hates wearing clothes when its hot and will take them off at home. Im more than happy for her to run around here naked but not so much at the beach or anywhere where there are a lot of other people that i may not know. SIL was telling me its immodest to let her be naked around the house at 2yrs old - DH and i both sorted her out
DH and i both have turns showering with her so no problems being naked around her at the moment -------------  Angel Baby Aug '12, Feb '13 |
Posted By: Littlechop
Date Posted: 03 March 2011 at 9:54pm
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I have no problems being naked in front of my 3 year old DD. Like someone else said, I would hate for her to have body issues - I am a large build (aka fat!) and I like that she can see my body and see that I am not ashamed of my size.
I grew up with a mother who blamed me for her stretchmarks and my brother for her sticky out tummy (because if it wasn't for him needing to get out the sun roof at 26 weeks gestation her tummy muscles wouldn't be rooted). My mum had/has body hang ups and I don't want to be the same and pass these onto my daughter. DD knows that my stretchies are my "special lines" from growing her in my tummy - not something to be embarrassed about. DD will hopefully realise that people come in all shapes and sizes and that is ok. DH is a bit funny about being nude in front of her but in saying that he does shower with her. He comes from a different sort of family than I do. I guess I want my kids to think of body parts as body parts and nothing dirty or to be ashamed of. Although I do like DD to have modesty in public - god I hate her even showing her knickers in skirts or dresses - she has to wear leggings or matching bloomers. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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