Dummy - yes or no?
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Category: Have A Baby?
Forum Name: First baby? Second or more?
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Printed Date: 23 August 2025 at 11:33pm
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Topic: Dummy - yes or no?
Posted By: Sporty1977
Subject: Dummy - yes or no?
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 8:22am
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I never used a dummy with my DS - now 20months, and have not got one for my DD 1 month., however I have friends who swear by them - others who hate them? dooes it help settle babies, would love comments about it?? Thanks
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Replies:
Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 8:29am
| I don't really like them. Didn't use it for my oldest apart from a couple of nights however my 10 month old has one and needs it. He's a major comfort sucker. I'd rather him have a dummy if it means he sleeps properly |
Posted By: clover
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 8:33am
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Not all babies will take them. Mine did for a week or so but wouldn't after that. He is a comfort sucker as well which meant that in the early days my boob was almost always in his mouth. I would have preferred the dummy but he wouldn't have a bar of it.
As long as it is only used for sleep not every time the child grizzles then I think they have their place. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: maya22
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 8:42am
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Depends on the baby.
DS1 had a dummy given to him in NICU - he was prem and had severe reflux. A dummy is like medicine to a refluxer, can help them so much. DS2 wouldn't take a dummy at all. ------------- DS1 July 2007 DS2 Nov 2010 http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: AandCsmum
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 9:00am
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DD never had one, hate the things! DS well that was a complete other story. It was me or the dummy...so I went with the dummy, as above he was a refluxer so it was a life saver. ------------- Kel http://lilypie.com"> 
A = 01.02.04 & C = 16.01.09 & G = 30.03.12 |
Posted By: Plushie
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 9:06am
I too hated them but DS is a comfort sucker and sucking me is no comfort (insane milk spray) so he needs it. I made a deal with myself it would never leave the cot and so far it hasnt. He has kind of given it up himself now, i no longer give it to him but leave it in the cot and he can put it in himself if he wants to, which he does about 50% of the time. I reckon anything that makes life easier is good 
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Posted By: Sporty1977
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 9:13am
| thinking I might try one with DD (1month old) for evenings when I am trying to bath, feed, put to bed 19month old DS.... DD is grizzly at this time of the day only! Plus through the night such a loud snorty sleeper I keep waking thinking she wants a feed but no just noisey!! |
Posted By: snugglebug
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 9:17am
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Im sort of torn on it, in the early days it was an absolute lifesaver to teach DS to settle, as he was a severely refluxy baby and nothing else would work, I never planned to use a dummy but you end up doing a lot of things you didn't plan on doing when faced with a screaming baby who won't sleep at all.
These days he still has it for sleeping and Im about to start weaning him off it as I think it's now more a habit than anything else. It annoys me now seeing it in his mouth as I think he thinks whenever a dummy is around what you do is put it in your mouth. He often finds them in random places and puts them in his mouth and Im like where did you get that from haha? So I would say try it, but try to keep it for sleep only if you can, then try wean off around 6 months before it's too much of a habit :) You do what you need to do to survive :) there's nothing wrong with it ------------- Me 28, DH 29 DS born 20 Nov 2010 (4 years old) #2 due October 7 http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: Hopes
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 9:28am
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I went into parenthood with a kind of vauge idea that they were the work of the devil and to be avoided at all costs, although I didn't really know why. Then Jacob settled amazingly when he tried one, and I binned all previous opinions and used it happily for six months. At that point, he was starting to wake for it in the night, so I binned it and the process of ditching it wasn't half as bad as I'd expected - three bad nights and he was over it.
So if they help, I'm all for them. I've heard lots of people say that they just don't do anything for some babies, though, so why not try and see? -------------   
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Posted By: mummymonster
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 9:38am
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Like most things, it's up to the parent and the baby.
DS1 LOVED his dummy, I was starting to think we'd never get rid of it. Then as he approached 2, we said it wasn't for big boys and took it away. He asked for it that night and the next and that was it. DS2 is 14wks and I WISH he would take a dummy! DS1 would get grumpy but a dummy would calm him down quick smart, with DS2 he won't take a dummy and it's so much harder to get him to settle. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 10:44am
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It's entirely up to you, DD has one and she loves her dummy she'll wean from it when she's ready.
I don't have any issues with them, if a baby wants to suck they'll find something to suck - fingers, thumbs, dummys, you. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">   [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: mothermercury
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 10:46am
Before having a baby, I also thought dummies were the work of the devil! Then my baby was born and was a biiiig comfort sucker, so in desperation I tried giving her a dummy, but she never took it. I tried so many times but she wouldn't have a bar of it; she was very much a boob girl. 
I say if it gives your baby some relief when you can't do it yourself (when you are putting your other baby to sleep, etc, completely understandable!), give it a go. If it works, great, you have an alternate method of soothing your baby! If not, you can say you tried it. 
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Posted By: Jaune
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 11:18am
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I was anti-dummies before having a baby. Never introduced one here and not sure it would even work, DS won't even take a bottle!
I just don't really like the idea of them. I guess my theory is that if they need 'comfort' give it to them, don't leave it up to a plastic teat to do it for you... But then my baby has been pretty relaxed, no reflux, colic or anything like that...and other than some pretty full on cluster feeding periods in the early days (sometimes up to 3hrs!) he's been easy to manage. And I only have him...might have a different idea if I had other children who were dependant on me too. But like Bowie said, if I was to introduce one, I'd put boundaries on it like only in the cot etc. At the end of the day, do what works for you and your baby. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: luvmylittlies
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 12:40pm
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Ha I was so idealistic about dummies. Nah, my child wouldn't need one. Anyway she was prem and they recommended we try one to help develop her sucking strength and supposedly to help with her silent reflux. But also we though that hey, you can take a dummy away later on but you can't take a thumb away. I was also a bit worried about the teeth thing with her thumb but the dental website says that up until they're 3 the thumb is not a problem. Anyway, after trying 3 different types we realised there was no way she wanted a dummy and ended up settling on her thumb after all. Typical. But also I have to say she can't drop it or throw it out of the cot at night!
As the others have said, it's up to you and your baby and try to ignore all the people out there that tell you what you 'should' be doing. ------------- Adoring Mum to Talisin 8/9/11 and Kiara 18/01/10 |
Posted By: MamaT
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 2:54pm
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I agree with what Juane said, I don't like dummies at all, I would much prefer my child was pacified by my breast, as nature intended. My son was a refluxer and very much attached to my breast for 99% of the day in the early months.
I think my thoughts on this are possibly swayed by seeing toddlers etc wandering around the mall etc with a dummy in their mouth, cringe -------------  
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Posted By: JoJames
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 3:28pm
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DS1 was a real sucker (a sucky baby) and we actually had to force him to take a dummy, or sit by his cot with our fingers in our mouths in order to get him to go to sleep. He refused to take it from 4mo.
DS2 got given it in NICU, it was his best friend from day one, now he only has it in bed and its a great sleep cue, we never have any problem getting him to go to sleep. We'll get rid of it eventually but it doesn't bother me. I do hate toddlers walking around with them hanging out, they don't need them during the day. But hey each to their own. ------------- http://www.alterna-tickers.com"> 
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Posted By: Sporty1977
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 4:55pm
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yep I think I am anti when I see kids with dummies all the time, or parents who put a dummy in the kids mouth as soon as the kid squeeks!
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Posted By: Plushie
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 6:44pm
| Urrrgh my neighbours kid is 6 and still on his, i hear him screaming every morning when they fight it off him on the way to school. I too would much much rather pacify DS via the breast but it simply didnt work for us :( i have such a strong milk flow even after hours of feeding, it just never stops spraying like a sprinkler! So poor DS has to gulp fast and try not to choke, no lazy suckling for him. It makes me very sad, esp as i cuddle him to sleep and he is cradled to me but with a dummy. But thats offtopic a bit. |
Posted By: SophieD
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 7:52pm
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I was pretty open minded about them before DD was born and we gave her one at 6 weeks. As above she was a comfort sucker and to be honest bf was sooo painful, there was no way I could let her suck endlessly!
She still has it now, but it has never left her cot (except for the odd sleep in the pram, but she doesn't need it in there usually) and I am happy with her having it in there for now. She spits it out as soon as she is asleep and rarely wakes for it. We'll get rid of it one day :-) ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: TheKelly
Date Posted: 09 August 2011 at 12:21pm
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love them,use them.Just hate them when its time to get rid of them ------------- 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Danda08
Date Posted: 09 August 2011 at 2:07pm
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I'm also a hater but my girls were given them in SCBU.
They only had them for day sleeps in the hammocks, in the car and in the pram but not at night in their cots so it seemed to be the movement association. Thankfully as soon as they started having all their sleeps in their cots at 5.5 months the dummies were gone cos I was already stressing about how to get rid of them having watched my sister battle with my 4 year old niece. So I think they have a place but like others I think they should be limited use things. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: pekay
Date Posted: 09 August 2011 at 3:49pm
O.M.G- Are you serious??? |
Bowie wrote:Posted By: Plushie
Date Posted: 09 August 2011 at 3:58pm
| Jeebers, blimmin computer/internet. Pekay, yup! Though i should clarify Max's dads neighbour not 'my' neighbour. |
Posted By: kiwigal
Date Posted: 09 August 2011 at 4:04pm
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Totally agree they have been a real life saver.
DS1 had his until he was about one and just stop using them altogether. DD2 is another story she is almost 3 and still has one. If she doesn't see one in sight then she is quite happy to go without it and has one when she goes to bed. Dh and I both agree that we will rather have our kids using dummies than them sucking their thumbs which will be a lot more harder to break than taking a dummy away.
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Posted By: JadeC
Date Posted: 09 August 2011 at 9:07pm
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Yep we use them, but I have rules, lol! 3 S's - dummys are only used when he's sick, sad or sleeping! So basically he only has it while sleeping the majority of them time, and actually spits it out fairly soon after falling asleep. ------------- http://pregnancy.baby-gaga.com/" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: minik8e
Date Posted: 09 August 2011 at 11:31pm
| Both my girls still have dummies. I am slowly weaning them off them through the day, but they are also quite happy to give them up unless they are tired. They were first given them just after being born in the NNU to try to develop their sucking reflex (born at 33w4d) and TBH, it made my life a heck of a lot easier. They were both refluxers. |
Posted By: londonbaby
Date Posted: 10 August 2011 at 9:29pm
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LOVE them when used right (as in just to help self settle). I never had to replace in middle of night as he just spits it out and stays asleep, and he only ever wants it when its bedtime. I totally believe its part of the reason he has slept through from 12 weeks old.
I'm glad I could use one for comfort at bedtime instead of my boobs constantly. Edited to say before I had DS I hated the idea of using one, but then quite a lot of my idealistic "I will nevers..." have gone out the window :) |
Posted By: Delli
Date Posted: 12 August 2011 at 6:39am
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I don't understand why there is such a negative social stigma attached to dummies. People think its cute if a child drags around a filthy ragged blankie or soft toy but a dummy is somehow grosser than that - at least a dummy can be washed and sterilised. Dummies are just another comforter - just like a blankie, a soft toy or a boob. I think a lot of people don't even know why they don't like them.... They just don't because someone, somewhere once inferred they were bad. Thumb sucking and dummies do not interfere with teeth until around primary school age when their permanent teeth start to appear - at which stage the majority have already grown out of thumb or pacifier sucking long ago.
J didn't require a dummy and W had one from 2 months through to 4 months at which stage he got a cold and kept spitting it out as he couldn't breathe through his nose. We decided it was more hassle than it was worth and ditched it. So my advice is that, for as long as it works for all parties involved - do what you like. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Hopes
Date Posted: 12 August 2011 at 7:37am
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Actually, that's a really interesting point, Delli - Jacob has a binkie (one of those little blanket/soft toy crosses) that he's really attached to, and that feels normal and 'natural'. he even sucks it's ears and corners sometimes when he's upset. There isn't really much difference in how 'natural' that is compared to a dummy.
I do like it better personally because in my mind a) it's cuter (no idea why) and b) he doesn't carry it round in his mouth (actually, we tend to keep it for the three S's JadeC mentioned, although I'd never made any concious decision on that). But that's just a personal thing, there's not much actual difference. -------------
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Posted By: fairy1
Date Posted: 12 August 2011 at 9:53am
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I only tried to use it on advice from my mum as ds was very difficult to settle when he was first born but he never took it. I don't really like them so that was fine me.
I have 2 mums in my coffee group who use them as soon as their baby grizzles and I don't like seeing children who are 2 or older with them, I just think it looks wrong. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: buzylizy
Date Posted: 12 August 2011 at 11:40am
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He he... Like the comment about "I will nevers..." going out the window....
------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: TheKelly
Date Posted: 12 August 2011 at 6:05pm
Totally agree! you said everything I was thinking! -------------
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Sporty1977
Date Posted: 13 August 2011 at 3:16pm
| thanks ladies - i havent used one yet and will hold off if I can. Im not totally against them but will only use one if needed. I did have a lady tell me the other day I should get a dummy cause my dd was crying - she was crying because it was feed time but I was busy changing ds napppy. That did annoy me.... ie if a baby is crying there is a reason - a dummy may solve some of those reasons byut not all of them. I'm all for making my life easier but not for beoing a lazy parent! ;-0 |
Posted By: CJsays
Date Posted: 13 August 2011 at 4:40pm
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we used very occasionally, maybe once a month when we needed peace at the dinner table and she was crying. good for use now and then i think, she found her thumb so we dont need one now :) ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: CJsays
Date Posted: 13 August 2011 at 4:42pm
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and yeah i completely agree, most times there is reason for the crying so the best option is to sort the crying out, not to just put a dummy in it! we only used when sanity was sorely needed! ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: mollycat
Date Posted: 18 August 2011 at 7:19pm
Where's that LIKE button? Totally agree with Delli. ------------- http://tickers.cafemom.com"> 
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Posted By: RuthyH
Date Posted: 19 August 2011 at 9:56am
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I never thought I'd use one, but after several nights where the only thing getting my son to sleep was me or Dad standing there with a finger in his mouth... well it seemed like the best option. We've travelled alot and it's been a godsend - stops his ears hurting on planes and he'll sleep anywhere so long as he has his dummy. He's 2 now so I know I have to get rid of it... but I'm in no rush! I agree with above posts keep it for sleep only if you can or it can effect speech development. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Panda289
Date Posted: 19 August 2011 at 6:41pm
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the only reason I ever heard of for avoiding the dummmy was nipple confusion so when we first tried it I said we would stop if it effected my breastfeeding which it didn't.
DS uses it for sleeping and as he is Colicky he is offered it when nothing else calms him down and in that regard it is a lifesaver for us! ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  
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Posted By: amalyse
Date Posted: 24 August 2011 at 10:51pm
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Have to post here.
LOVE the dummy currently, and so does my daughter - and well, i'm for making her happy... so i'm rolling with it. She got hers on day 5 - and no there was no nipple confusion and no there was no latch problems either. The stigma is rediculous, I was sooo concerned about weaning her - but so far I have not felt the need. I would rather be out with my content baby sucking on her dummy than one screaming the place down. Sucking helps her relax when she needs to, just like taking a nice hot shower does for me. If you do use one and want to get rid of it early, get rid of it before 14 weeks - I read this somewhere and I did notice my daughter got "more" attached after then. ------------- 
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Posted By: mummyofprinces
Date Posted: 25 August 2011 at 7:31pm
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Have not read the other posts.
I hate dummies, hate, hate, hate. My eldest however had silent reflux and was a comfort sucker, he loved them. Love, love, love! Only a couple of weeks ago did he self wean from the dummy and prior to that it was attached to him 24/7, sometimes even with one in mouth and one in hand. My little guy however... not interested, at.all! which can be quite frustrating at the umpteenth night wake up that only boobie will resettle. I say do what works for you and your baby, who cares what anyone else thinks. -------------   
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 25 August 2011 at 7:45pm
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DD still has hers its great for soothing her and I use it mostly for sleep and it was a lifesaver when we flew recently to help with her ears.
I don't understand why people don't like them either. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: Panda289
Date Posted: 28 August 2011 at 12:48am
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Good to know it helps with the ears while flying Caliandjack, we are flying home for Christmas and I am very nervous about the taking off and landing but will definitely be offering the dummy if it helps ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">
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