So Sad
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: Pregnant
Forum Name: Pregnancy
Forum Description: Pregnant! Wanting to chat to other mums-to-be (or dads-to-be)? Share your thoughts, experiences, and ideas... This is that place!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4251
Printed Date: 29 August 2025 at 2:59pm
Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 12.05 - http://www.webwizforums.com
Topic: So Sad
Posted By: fattartsrock
Subject: So Sad
Date Posted: 28 October 2006 at 9:02pm
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Ok, this is a sad sad post.
Most of you will have read a post somewhere by me at some stage, about how when I was pregnant with Jacob, my best friend had a stillborn full term baby. Emjay died somewhere between the time my friend went into labour, and when she got to the hospital about 3 hours later. Anyhow, that was such an awful time, with many difficult emotions etc, and made the remainder of my pregnancy very long and nervous. Anyhow, today My BF rung me with the news that a friend of ours, who's baby is due 3 days after our #2, went into labour last night, her waters broke, and the baby died, he couldn't be saved. 
I am so devestated for her and her hubby, as well, as feeling awful for my BF, as it is bringing back lots of awful memories for her. And selfishly, I feel so, so bad and scared and guilty and I can't believe that in both my pregnancies, I have had a friend who has had a still born baby. When I was talking to her on thursday, she was so excited about this baby and she had been having her first definate feelings of movement over the last week or so. not looking for sympathy here, just wanted to unload really. ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Replies:
Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 28 October 2006 at 9:15pm
| That is so sad. I always think there is no "right" way to feel when someone dies and your feelings, while you might think of them as selfish, to me are perfectly reasonable. as would be, and I really hope i don't offend you, the feeling "Thank goodness it wasn't me". It is really ahrd when a friend goes through something like that, and maybe doubly so when you are pregnant too and you may think that you can't be ahppy over your baby because of hers. I hope your friend....well, recovers isn't the right word as i don't think you "recover" from losing a child, lets say, receives the love and support she needs and I hope you do too! |
Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 28 October 2006 at 9:26pm
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Yeah its the thank goodness it wasn't me thing that makes me feel worse, especially when my baby is kicking me flat out, and I whinge for the 7 millionth time aobut the never ending morning sickness...
Nothing *much* offends me, Liz! ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 28 October 2006 at 9:38pm
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That IS really sad. I hope you're okay. I haven't known anyone who has had a stillbirth but just dealing with two friends at the same time who had m/c's last year was enough for me (and I wasn't even pregnant then). -------------  |
Posted By: AlyAyde
Date Posted: 28 October 2006 at 9:43pm
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Life bites sometimes..... Im really sorry to hear that. And I hope she has all the love and support she needs. ------------- Jayde 25/12/04 Alyssa 08/04/03 http://Alyayde.bebo.com |
Posted By: my2angels
Date Posted: 28 October 2006 at 9:59pm
| that is sad. makes you realise how lucky you are when you have healthy babies. Makes my decision not to push my luck and try for a third much easier when you hear things like that |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 29 October 2006 at 9:08am
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Yep, life bites. I remember reading Emjay's story in the Treasures mag a few months back, so sad. Thinking of your friend and her family. ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: Deez
Date Posted: 29 October 2006 at 9:20am
Oh that's really sad so id just like to say the same as Angelnz
-------------  
Lycan and Peyton = Moon and back!! |
Angelnz wrote:Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 29 October 2006 at 2:51pm
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I remember that story in the mag as well and I was crying by the end of it. ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: newmum
Date Posted: 29 October 2006 at 3:20pm
 I feel for you and your friends. When I was pregnant one of my group of preggy mums lost her baby in childbirth. I remember feeling so scared about my (at that time unborn) baby and so terribly sad for her, I still do. I also felt guilty giving birth to such a perfect (in my eyes) baby only 10 days later. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
|
Posted By: jax
Date Posted: 29 October 2006 at 3:34pm
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I have a lady on my 'friends list' on LiveJournal that gave birth to a baby girl who passed away only seven hours later... and reading some of her entries really brings tears to my eyes !! Those kind of stories are really humbling and make me *so* grateful for my perfect, healthy little girl. ------------- Jacquie - Mama to Erin, 13.07.06 - Chief Cat Chaser & Marmite Sammie Eater 
Love many, trust few, harm none. ~Anon~ |
Posted By: Millie1976
Date Posted: 30 October 2006 at 11:13am
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I am so sorry to hear of your friend's news - she must be devastated ------------- Sebastien 2 years old Olivier 3 3/4 years old |
Posted By: Peace
Date Posted: 02 November 2006 at 8:50pm
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I can most definitely say that I know EXACTLY how you feel. About 3 weeks before Olivia was due a friend of mine lost her baby 1 day before her due date. I was a mess for her and completely paranoid about my own pregnancy. After all my friend was healthier than I was and did all the right things! But we grieve in our own ways for the losses of others and it is so easy to transfer their tradgedy into a fear reality when it comes to situations of our own. You are not selfish otherwise you would not be so concerned about her situation and the health of your child.
I do hope that your friend has lots of support at this time and the sun is shining for you!------------- DD1 May 2006 DD2 March 2011 DD3 August 2012 |