Coffee Catchup 25th November with Dorothy Waide
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Topic: Coffee Catchup 25th November with Dorothy Waide
Posted By: skiltz
Subject: Coffee Catchup 25th November with Dorothy Waide
Date Posted: 25 November 2013 at 10:27am
| OHbaby! Coffee Catchup - Auckland 25th November. Feel free to ask questions and Dorothy will reply when she can. |
Replies:
Posted By: Susan97631
Date Posted: 26 November 2013 at 8:57am
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Hi Dorothy What time would you recommend bed time for my 7.5m old? currently it is anywhere between 7:30-9pm. Wake up is between 8:30-9:30 and on 2 solid meals per day. She wakes at least once and always around 5. (I try to settle without a feed first but if she wakes within the hr again then I will feed her) and often again a couple of hours later. She is having lunch and dinner but think i should make it breakfast and dinner? Thanks |
Posted By: Susan97631
Date Posted: 26 November 2013 at 9:06am
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Also any tips to get her to nap when we are out at familiy/friends places so no pram or portacot. Last question she always wakes up when transferring her from car seat to cot, any tips to get her to fall asleep quickly once back in her cot? Sometimes I have just leave her in the Car seat with the door open and I sit with her till she wakes. |
Posted By: Alice van der Wende
Date Posted: 26 November 2013 at 9:26am
| Hi. I have two questions. My daughter is 6 months old. She is breastfed 5 times a day and on 2 solid meals a day (about 2-3 tablespoons). She is a good sleeper. She wakes at 7am (though sometimes I am unsure exactly when as sometimes she is already awake and playing in her cot when I come in), is down for nap at 9-9.30, sleeps for 1.5-2 hours. She then takes a second nap at 1-2pm and sleeps for 1-1.5 hours. I have just recently dropped the 3rd cap nap though give it to her if the 2nd sleep is short or ends before 3pm. The bedtime is the main issue - she sleeps from 7pm till 7am BUT will cry for half an hour to 1 hour pretty much every night when put down. She is put down awake into her sleeping bag and close the blinds to let her know it is sleep time and is left to go to sleep. I check on her 5 mins after and she is usually asleep. But I don't know why at bedtime, she cries for that long when she doesn't do it for any other sleeps. I dread bedtime everyday as she cries even harder when my husband tries to put her down! My second question is I currently dream feed at 10pm so how do I remove that? Thank you for your help. |
Posted By: Loren.christina1
Date Posted: 26 November 2013 at 9:44am
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Hi Dorothy, Thank you for yesterday, it was great! My baby is due to arrive in a few weeks, I'm feeling a little anxious about the first few weeks trying to establish a loose routine for us to follow so we can all stay sane and enjoy getting to know our little one. I have your routine guidelines from yesterday which is great, but just wondering if you have any tips or tricks for the first few days that you could share with me in regards to helping little one to sleep well? Thanks! |
Posted By: Shortcakes
Date Posted: 26 November 2013 at 9:54am
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Hi. My baby boy is 14.5 weeks & doesn't sleep through the night. He is in bed 6:30/7pm & I dream-feed at 10pm. He then wakes around 3-4am for a feed & awake for the day between 6-7am. If I drop the dream-feed & try to re-settle him, he wakes between 12-2am & again at 4-5am & won't re-settle at these times unless I feed him. What is the best way to drop the night feeds? Thanks for yesterday, it was very informative :) |
Posted By: lle002
Date Posted: 26 November 2013 at 10:05am
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hi dorothy, thank you for your speech yesterday. Can you please help me with your expert advice. I have a 11 weeks old baby who is colicky and alwaysss takes catnaps at daytime 20 mins, 30 mins & 40 mins.. not in any particular order)and constantly wakes up in gassy pain at night time. I was feeding on demand but find it unhelpful now as she can go longer than 5 hrs so i need a time routine for her... What 24hr time schedule/routine would you set out for this kind of baby? Oh and regarding resettling for catnapping... she hates being put on the side whether held/engulf or on bed so hard to cup her bottom. any other technique or angle? how many mins should i let her cry b4 going in to resettle her? 
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Posted By: Luckymama23
Date Posted: 26 November 2013 at 11:50am
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Hi Dorothy, Thank you for such an interesting & informative seminar yesterday! Just after tips for my 3month old to extend her awake times during the day. I notice on you recommend an hour & a half for her age, but we find she doesn't want to get out of her newborn routine, and if we keep her up longer she gets grizzly & grumpy! (of up for an hour & sleeping for 3.) She is gaining heaps of weight, so I don't think its because she doesn't get enough food. And she sleeps around 10pm-6am at night consistently. (not that Im complaining, as her routine is pretty awesome! just aware she does need to start being up longer & longer during the day!) ------------- 2 superstars too many miscarriages 2009-2014 |
Posted By: Reems
Date Posted: 26 November 2013 at 12:16pm
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Hi Dorothy, Thank you for yesterdays talk. My 5 month old boy goes to sleep around 8pm, and lately has been waking every 2 to 3 hours from 2am. He has two naps a day, sometimes three, and rice cereal around 11am and 6pm along with breast milk around three to four times a day. I can't get him to resettle him so resort to breastfeeding every time he wakes up. HELP! |
Posted By: Jeanette134003
Date Posted: 26 November 2013 at 12:29pm
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Thanks for the session yesterday. I have 2 questions. During the day my 12 week old daughter sleeps for 45 mins at a time. I'm trying your settling in the arms technique today&it seems to work well to settle her initially, then I put her in her bassinet. 45 mins later, I've tried to shsh her back to sleep when she stirs but she ends up ramping up to a full cry very quickly. I can get her to sleep again using the holding technique you showed us, but she wakes as soon as I try to put her in the bassinet so I start the feed cycle again, but she's clearly dozey when feeding. Any advice on this please? 2nd question is at night, she goes to sleep around 9pm and usually wakes around 2am, but has had the odd night where she's gone through to 4am. This past week, she's waking more e.g. 1.30am, 3 & 5 last night. I tried resettling but she gets worked up so I end up feeding (she only feeds for 5-10 mins then dozes)& I try sneak her back to bed. Any advice? Should I try the settling in arms then put her back in bed or is this defeating the purpose of her self settling. Thanks for your advice! |
Posted By: 1
Date Posted: 26 November 2013 at 12:37pm
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We have a 4 1/2 month old who self settles well but tends to wake after 50 mins during the day and every 3-4 hours at night. I've been feeding her a night as it seems easiest but realise that this may not be ideal in the long run. Last night she went down at 7.30 woke at 11.30, 3.30, 6 and then up at 8 am. At the first two feeds I went to try to settle her instead of feeding but she was sucking my arm like crazy so I thought she was hungry. How do we know she isn't hungry? She is a fast feeder and has no issues with weight gain! Hunger aside, Is the best plan that we master cupping during the day and once we can do that start trying at night or can we start now for both day and night? And if we encourage her to go back to sleep which feed should we drop first as I don't want her to have nothing between bedtime and 8am. Many thanks |
Posted By: Lavinia106993
Date Posted: 26 November 2013 at 1:31pm
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Hi Dorothy, Thank you for a useful session yesterday. My little boy is almost 11 weeks old and weights 5kg. I am told he should be heavy enough to being able to start sleeping longer through the nights. During the daytime he catnaps- 25-45 mins and then awakens. I find it hard to settle hime back to sleep in the cot- if I catch it early I can place his pacifier back in and he can resettle. But I usually end up having to carry him and place him in a sling- he will sleep happily there for an hour. Please can you give me more tips on how to resettle- he likes to suck his pacifier and fingers. At night he still wakes up 3 times post being pout to sleep. Bedtime round 7- likely needs 30min to sleep. I do the Feed-bath-feed- sleep routine before bed. Then wakes at 10pm, 1am, 4am. he then wakes up around 5: 30 but I have been stretching out this time to 7 am with a pacifier- How do I make him sleep longer? Also I remember you mentioning that during the day I should offer a top up feed to the baby before putting him down for a nap- how much off a top up? How long should I take to try and resettle him before giving up!? Sometime its almost time for his next feed! Thank you for your help |
Posted By: Emily134024
Date Posted: 26 November 2013 at 2:31pm
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Hi Dorothy, Thanks for yesterday. You mentioned that you recommend a type of block out blind that has guides at the sides for the blind to slide down in. Can you tell me where you get them or the brand ? Thanks ! |
Posted By: lyndamonroyf133793
Date Posted: 26 November 2013 at 8:46pm
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Hi Dorothy, Your seminar was awesome - learnt lots :) Thanks heaps. My daughter Maria is waking up almost every 2 to 3 hours during the night. She used to only wake up once or twice (6 months old). I spoke to you briefly yesterday and you mentioned she needs more calaries during the day i.e solids. I tried to give her rice cereal couple of times after a breast feed but she wasn't interested. Its been hot today so wondering maybe their appetite reduces in the heat? She also wasn't too interested in the breast as she normally is so wondering if it could be due to the heat as well. During the night shes very interested in the breast! Because she wasn't eating a lot today I thought may as well try kumera (shes had it before). Two hours later she power chucked it up (shes never vomited like this before and her vomit was huge and very smelly) from memory I don't think she had much milk before the kumera. We also gave her some Welida teething powder maybe couple of hours before her meal. So wonder whether that caused her vomit or could it be that maybe shes not ready for solids? How do you know if shes not ready for solids? She watches us eat, does the chewing motions and has enjoyed food (just past couple of days has been a bit different) Shes a big growing baby? She didn't have a temperature from the vomit and my friend who is a nurse checked her out when she visited. Was a bit scary seeing her power chuck like that. Could the waking up in the night be also because of the heat? she still sleeps in our room and we obviously need to move her. Could that be a reason too? How many solids a day? If shes too young for kumera when should I start? Only stick with rice cereal for a month or so? Mix it with breast milk or water? Thank you very much for your help. Regards Lynda |
Posted By: Claire134064
Date Posted: 26 November 2013 at 9:30pm
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Hello Dorothy, My 6.5 month old son keeps himself awake because he rubs his eyes and head - we find he can go to sleep if we very gently hold his arms but is there anything else we can do? We've never swaddled him because he didn't like it and always wanted his arms free. Thanks |
Posted By: betsy120645
Date Posted: 26 November 2013 at 9:31pm
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Hi Dorothy I have an 11 week old who is a good night sleeper but she normally wakes at 6 for the day and I'd like to push her out to 7am. We have just put black out material up which has helped. She normally goes down about 8pm. We had been waking her at 10 to feed but dropped that after hearing you speak yesterday. She normally wakes about 5am to feed - and then wakes again around 6am. She has slept straight to 6 a couple of times this week. When she wakes at 6 she is very awake and won't easily resettle in her bassinet without feeding. If I lay her on me in bed she will go back to sleep though. Also i would love to know how to successfully transfer her to her car seat when she's asleep - she hates her capsule so if she wakes she often won't resettle. Thanks so much (and thanks for all the info yesterday!) Betsy |
Posted By: Melissa122528
Date Posted: 26 November 2013 at 9:54pm
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Hi Dorothy, Thanks for your seminar yesterday, there was a lot to take in! I was just wondering if you could give me an idea of what you would suggest as a good sleep routine for a 4 month old (i.e. ideal times and lengths of sleeps over a 24 hr period). Currently he is up somewhere between 6 and 7am, will do one long sleep (1.5-2.5 hrs) either in the morning or the afternoon (this is a bit random) and a couple of short 30-45 minute sleeps during the day. He will generally go down somewhere between 7:30 and 9pm and sleep through till 1 or 2am when I feed him and then he easily goes back down to sleep till the morning again. Is this generally ok? I would like to get two long sleeps during the day but I find if he wakes fully after his first sleep cycle he is just not interested in going back to sleep so any thoughts on whether it is still worth trying to get him back to sleep in this situation would be appreciated. Also I realise that he may be able to sleep through without the feed at 2pm but haven't tried to cut this out yet. Thanks very much! Melissa |
Posted By: Reems
Date Posted: 26 November 2013 at 9:58pm
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Hi Dorothy, Would you be able to please let me know what a good daily schedule would be for a 5 or 6 month old, i.e. nap times and for how long, when to feed etc. Thank you :) |
Posted By: Mel134084
Date Posted: 27 November 2013 at 11:46am
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Hi Dorothy, My 10 month old boy is having a morning sleep, which varies between 1-2 hours but some days does not want to sleep in the afternoon. Yesterday he had a morning sleep 2 hours 9.30 -11.30 and then I put him down at 2.30 but he don’t sleep, but was happy to be in his cot for 30-40 minutes and was awake until bedtime at 7.30. What could be causing him not to sleep in the afternoon? Should I cut down on his morning sleep? |
Posted By: Juliet134126
Date Posted: 28 November 2013 at 5:44am
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Hi Dorothy, Goodness, what a lot of questions you have to answer! Hopefully at some point you'll get a chance to get to mine. I have a 14 week old who is sleeping well at night (8pm-5am) but is not so great at napping during the day. It often takes a while to get her to go down and then she'll only sleep 40 mins max. My two questions are 1) how do I move from settling her myself to getting her to fall asleep on her own and 2) how do I encourage resettling when she wakes after one sleep cycle? Thank you so much for taking the time to answer these questions. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 November 2013 at 9:48pm
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Hi ideally her bedtime would be anywhere between 6 and 7.30pm. As she is waking around 5.00am and you are able to resettle then I would suggest starting the day ideally at 6.30am however 6.00am is acceptable. The time you start your day is an individual preference and depends on your household. For me ideally the start of the day is 7.00am however it does take time to get to this wake up time. At 7.5 months I would be giving her 3 meals and day and also solids before milk. At 8 months MHO and Plunket recommend to changing milk and food around so she is the ideal age to start doing this. Here is a guideline for you to look at. 6.00am Wakes 6.30am Breakfast ( a little earlier but the goal is to get this to 7.00am), Cereal mixed with milk - optional to add fruit the ratio I use is 1 tablespoon of cereal to 1 teaspoon of fruit) - Cereals to consider are millet, quinoa, amaranth, wholemeal baby rice or normal processed white baby rice. Offer breast once she leaves the highchair 9.00am Full breast feed 9.15am Nap - minimum 1 1/2 hours resettle if she wakes before this 11.15am Lunch - Vegetables - puree - offer finger food this teaches them texture, taste and smell and ideally the finger food is the same as what is in the puree. Optional offer sips of water with meal Optional offer breast once she leaves her highchair (i would recommend this) 1.45pm Full breast feed 2.00pm Nap - same as above 4.00pm Dinner - cereal optional to offer fruit - same ratios as above (breakfast). Offer breast once she leaves the highchair Evening routine bath, milk, sleeping bag 6.30 - 6.45pm Bed for the night NIght waking resettle - if feeding ensure you are feeding for hunger and not comfort. I have also attached my notes on introducing solids and vegetables plus a menu planner for when you are on a full diet (protein) uploads/45521/Introducing_Solids-_Nov._2013_.pdf" rel="nofollow - Introducing_Solids-_Nov._2013_.pdf uploads/45521/Dorothys_Vegetables_Nov_2013.pdf" rel="nofollow - Dorothys_Vegetables_Nov_2013.pdf uploads/45521/SuggestedMenuon_FullDiet_Nov_2013copy.pdf" rel="nofollow - SuggestedMenuon_FullDiet_Nov_2013copy.pdf |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 November 2013 at 9:53pm
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While out and about and there is no pram or portacot then I would suggest doing it in arms. People do suggest putting them on a bed with pillows around them, however this is not safe and you must be aware that a baby can move up under the pillows. I don't encourage sleeping in carseats, however everyone does do this, but again I would need to point out that this is not a safe option. So again if out and about then I would do it in arms. Transferring you haven't mentioned whether she resettles in naps so the goal would be to teach her to resettle so that when transferring she will learn to do this herself It will take her a good 20 minutes plus to resettle once you put her into the cot, and I do this with cupping and shushing. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 November 2013 at 10:16pm
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Lets answer the dream feed question first. Dream feeds In my experience dream feeds are controversial and need to be carefully considered before incorporating them into a feeding schedule. They differ from night feeds in that they are parent-led – the choice of the parent and not the baby. Dream feeds are given between 10pm and midnight and involve feeding a sleeping baby as opposed to one that wakes naturally. They are supposed to lengthen a baby’s sleep cycle to give a tired parent a reprieve. However, there is no evidence to indicate that dream feeds guarantee parents’ extended sleep. Research shows that dream feeds are thought to interfere with a baby’s most precious and deepest phase of sleep that occurs between 9pm and midnight. Make sure you are well informed before making your own decision, as once in place dream feeds can be difficult and disruptive to eliminate from your baby’s routine. If you do decide to include them, ideally aim to drop them by the age of six months. Neuroscientists believe that deliberately feeding a sleeping baby meddles with digestion, growth and development and can disrupt long-term sleeping patterns. Dropping the Dream Feed You just need to have faith in yourself that if your baby wakes, then you need to resettle her. You may have a rough few nights, however, in the long term it is far healthier for her to sleep through the night and eat during the day. Some people may suggest slowly reducing the amount of milk you give your baby or exchanging it for water, but I believe it is not about what is in the bottle but the sucking comfort – so the quicker you drop it the quicker she will not look for it. With regard to why does she cry at this time of the night it could be for various reasons. My first comment would be that she is overtired. From your notes it looks like she has an awake time of 3 hours plus. I would suggest trying something like this and see if it helps 7.00am Wakes (I would take the awake time from this point) 7.15 - 7.30am Breakfast cereal, fruit and milk 9.45am Full milk feed 10.00am Nap (wakes after 1.5 hours - u can adjust for the 2 hour nap) 11.45 - 12.00 Lunch vegetables, milk 2.00pm Full milk feed 2.15pm Nap (again based on 1 1/2 hours so adjust if she sleeps longer) 4.15pm Dinner - cereal,fruit, milk Evening routine bath, milk 6.45pm Bed for the night - if she doesn't settle within an appropriate time then reoffer breast - this isn't about letting her fall asleep on the boob but ensuring she is getting what she needs. I have also posted my notes earlier on introducing solids, vegetables and a menu planner for when she is on a full diet. In these notes, I cover why I offer solids before milk, and also the different ways of incorporating milk and solids depending on the baby. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 November 2013 at 10:27pm
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Hi in those first few days you are not busy getting to know your baby and the best place for this is in either mums or dads arms. Newborns love to be held and in my experience this is called 'mothering' or 'nurturing' . When holding your baby in arms to sleep, try and avoid movement like walking and rocking. Some newborns just love to suck and if you need a break then either let your baby suckle on your finger or dummy - just ensure that they have been on the breast before doing this though. Remember you can't spoil a baby and a baby has no idea how to manipulate their parents. Here are some of my notes on newborns. Good latch on's will also help to minimise nipple issues so have attached my deep latch on notes. Try practising before the baby comes. Suggested Notes for newborns to 12 weeks The “Fourth” Trimester The term fourth trimester refers to the first 12 weeks of a baby’s life. When working with mothers and partners, I suggest that the fourth trimester encompasses birth to 11 weeks. The 12th week is when you sit back and decide how you want to parent and then to set it in place. When making a decision, it is vital that you work within your limits and not those of others. This is your opportunity to parent as works best for you. Bear in mind all parents make mistakes; we only learn by making mistakes. From week 12 onwards, I encourage all parents to start a routine that is flexible but with a backbone. Life calls for flexibility and if you are able to demonstrate this in how you live, your baby will most likely adjust more easily to sudden changes. Routine is the baby cries – you respond Routine is the nappy needs changing Routine is feeding the baby at regular intervals Crying is a survival instinct for babies and it is important to respond to your baby when she/he cries. Remember: You cannot spoil a baby under 12 weeks old. A baby under 12 weeks old cannot manipulate you. If anyone tells you anything that doesn’t involve nurturing have a good look at that person and see if that is what you want to copy. Remember if you are holding a baby (during nap time) that your body represents their bed so if the bed moves then your body can move – if it doesn’t move (the bed) then don’t move. Holding a baby requires calmness and being still. Movement of any form is the hardest thing to break in a baby and is not necessary to calm a baby. Breast Feeding – Latching On Deep Latch On Technique A deep latch on enables your baby to empty your breast more efficiently. It helps with milk production and avoids nipple issues. It also helps reduce the intake of air. With this technique, you are trying to make available the most breast tissue as possible – this will help your nipple to be correctly positioned inside your baby’s mouth. Madonna hold To do a deep latch on, hold the same breast with your hand i.e. left breast, left hand. Imagine your breast as the face of a clock, now position your finger and thumb at 9 and 3 (basically holding the breast in a “U” shape) making sure that the first finger is well under the breast and not interfering with the lower jaw of the baby latching onto the breast. Rubgy (football) hold A rubgy hold is where you tuck your baby under your arm with her/his legs facing backwards with her/his head resting in the same hand as the arm she/he is tucked under. In this position, the breast is held in the opposite hand to the breast in a “C” shape where the finger and thumb are at 12 and 6. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 November 2013 at 10:57pm
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Hi you haven't mentioned how often you feed during the day or what his awake times are so here is a suggested routine for you to look at. What you are looking at for his consistency in his awake times and naps not the hours that you choose to feed. At 15 weeks I would be working towards his awake times being around 2 hours and having naps of minimum 1 1/2 hours. Here is a guideline routine for you to look at - what you are working on is the consistency not the actual clock hours - these will change until he sleeps through the night and has a regular wake time and bed time. With regard to the night feeds - I would suggest resettling, however if he does not resettle then you need to feed. Some people would suggest either doing shorter feeds, or offering water, however in my experience I find that if you take the time to resettle then this eventually will push the feeds out and if you feed then you offer a full feed. The reason why I do top ups is that the gastric emptying of a breastfed baby after 120 minutes is 16 to 18% therefore it is important to ensure that when we are putting our babies down for naps or night time that they have a full tummy 6.00am Early morning feed 7.45am Top up 8.00am Nap (basing this on naps of 1 1/2 hours) 9.30am Mid morning feed 10.15am Top up 10.30am Nap same as above 12.00pm Mid day feed 1.45pm Top up 2.00pm Nap same as above 3.30pm Early afternoon feed - I would tend to do the evening routine here which is bath, top up and bed for the night by 5.30pm OR you an alternatively do this (i find that this is to late in the evening for the bath and top up so in my experience i opt for the earlier night time routine - once he has stretched his awake times out further or wakes later in the morning this will adjust to more of a 6.30 to 7.30pm bedtime). 5.15pm Top up 5.30pm Nap same as above 7.00pm Evening feed then evening routine - bath, top up 9.00pm Bed for the night I have posted the notes on dream feeds and in my experience I would suggest that you take the time to resettle when he wakes for the first night feed. Resettling will stretch out the night waking as if he doesn't settle then you would feed him, however if he doesn't resettle then you do need to feed him. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 November 2013 at 11:27pm
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First of all I would be addressing her gas issues, before looking at anything else. As you are breastfeeding I would suggest looking at your dairy intake and perhaps taking this out of your diet for a good 72 hours. This means not even a pinhead as to get a good reading it needs to be out of your diet totally. If after 72 hours there is no difference then I would suggest looking at the other two food groups sugar and gluten and re introducing the dairy. YOu could also try some alternative products - Quintessence make up Dorothy Drop's which I have found to be very effective but there are numerous other products on the market that are available Good burping techniques are also important so I have attached these notes for you. Also you could try alternative therapies such as cranial or acupuncture treatments. What would be a suggested routine for a baby who is cat napping and having gas issues would be to teach her to self settle and resettle in my arms for a minimum of 10 days and then when you feel confident and your baby is sleeping longer stretches then to do my over 12 weeks nurturing within boundaries and you replace your body with the cot. Yes, it is hard to cup a baby while on their back but you need to just work with the tools and work with your baby and find a way to do it that you are comfortable with. I will adapt the way I cup babies to suit their particular needs so you need to just experience and see what your baby responds to. With regard to feeding on demand if you are not allowing her to have time to process her food then its a little like putting food into her tummy that is still in pain so this is where the minimum 1 1/2 hours for naps helps. IF you cannot resettle then of course you would feed her but ideally some of her naps you will be able to resettle. With her having issues with colic and catnap I probably wouldn't leave her to cry in her cot at all. This is something that you need to feel comfortable with - the rule of thumb is a minute per week of age, however I wouldn't recommend leaving a baby this age for longer than 5 minutes. IN fact I would be doing this in arms so that she feels your body against hers. An 11 week old baby their awake time would be approx 1 1/2 hours with a minimum of 1 1/2 hours per nap. When your baby wakes I would feed, play and depending on how long it takes to feed your baby I may offer a top up before going back to feed. uploads/45521/Burping_nov_2013.docx" rel="nofollow - Burping_nov_2013.docx |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 November 2013 at 11:46pm
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Hi i would suggest stretching her by 15 minutes at a time. ONce you have stretched here awake time for ten days then stop, think and act. If she is settled and has adjusted then do the next stretch, however if she is not ready to stretch then stay at this timeframe and address every 10 days until you feel she is ready for the next step. I would be also working to get her nighttime routine to start around 7pm so that she is getting that good sleep before midnight. Once you address the going to bed at 10pm and bringing it forward you may find that she will be easily to stretch as she would be getting more sleep at night therefore not so tired during the day. Now to stretch her out I would suggest when she wakes, that you take time to play with her in her cot for approx 5 minutes, pick up change, feed, burp, finish feeding, on the floor on her own to enjoy her company and then intervene when she gets bored with toys and then when bored with toys your company. Change nappy offer top up and into bed. If babies have no time on the floor on their own they do get tired quickly and are harder to stretch out. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 November 2013 at 11:51pm
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Hi you haven't mentioned how long his awake times are. Looking at what you have written below I would suggest he needs more feeds during the day and I would suggest introducing lunch time food of vegetables and seeing if that helps. YOu also haven't mentioned how long he naps for whether he self settles wakes during naps and resettles so all this points would need to be addressed. I have posted information on introducing solids, vegetables earlier and have attached to general guideline routines - the difference is depending on whether their first feed of the day is milk or solids. uploads/45521/Option_One__5-8mths_Nov_2013.pdf" rel="nofollow - Option_One__5-8mths_Nov_2013.pdf uploads/45521/Option_Two_5-8mths_Nov_2013.pdf" rel="nofollow - Option_Two_5-8mths_Nov_2013.pdf |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 02 December 2013 at 9:06pm
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Hi I would be looking at your daytime routine - I have posted two routine guidelines earlier regarding what the feeding rhythm would be for babies of this age. Have a look at these routines and also other questions i have already answered and if you still have further questions please PM me and I will answer. I would be looking at something like this breakfast solids(cereal mixed with milk plus fruit) plus breastmilk, breast milk 15 mins before nap nap minimum 1 1/2 hours resettle if he wakes before this Lunch veggies plus breast milk breastmilk 15 minutes before nap nap as above Dinner solids (cereal mixed with milk plus fruit) plus breast milk Evening routine, bath, breast, bed IF he doesn't settle within 20 minutes remoffer breast and the start the nighttime sleep settling again |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 02 December 2013 at 9:12pm
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Hi you haven't mentioned her awake times or how long it takes to feed her. I would suggest that her awake times are around 1 /2 to maximum 2 hours. With regard to feeding she feeds when she wakes and then 15 minutes before her naps re offer her milk. This will not cause a feed/sleep association as long as you feed, swaddle/sleeping bag and then into bed. As she is only twelve weeks I would suggest trying for up to 10 days the settling and resettling in arms. Remember whatever you do in arms you need to be able to do in the cot. So if in arms you would do the following Settling in Arms Pick baby up and remain calm while still allowing your body and mind to nurture your baby. Think of this as your body being their bed. Sit down in a quiet place and ‘ride the storm’. Initially, hold your baby in the Engulf Hold. There should be no rocking, cupping/patting, shushing, talking or eye contact. The following times are guidelines it will depend on how baby responds and your choices. Allow her/him to cry in your arms from 2 to 5 minutes; sometimes you may need to do it for longer. your baby’s cry may escalate for a few minutes then taper off or could stop and start like a car engine. Remember it is just her/his way of de-stressing and winding down. your baby may cry, then settle herself/himself and fall asleep. If baby continues to cry then intervene with cupping and shushing, and if necessary offer a dummy. If your baby continues to cry then stop the cupping and shushing and allow her/him to cry for up to 5 minutes and then intervene with the cupping and shushing. You should repeat this until you can actually calm her/him down and help her/him find her/his sleep. The time frames given are only guidelines and in the beginning you will probably not do more than a minute – but over time you will increase the time frame as your baby grows. As your baby drifts off to sleep, replace the cupping and shushing with patting until she/he is asleep. Remember this is her/his ‘light’ sleep. Resettling in arms If your baby stirs, start cupping and shushing until she/he returns to sleep. It is possible that during the light sleep phase that your baby will alternate between sleep and stirring before eventually moving to a deep sleep cycle. Once asleep, switch to gentle patting and shushing. By now an hour may have passed. You may choose to let your baby sleep the entire nap in your arms. Alternatively you may transfer her/him to her/him cot once she/he has progressed from light to deep sleep. This takes approximately 1-Ľ hours of holding your baby. If you choose to transfer your baby to her/his cot at this stage then continue to pat her/his bottom during the transition. Once baby is in the cot then place your other hand firmly on her/his chest, providing as much connection as possible. This is what I call “engulfing in the cot”. Slowly remove your hand from your baby’s chest and reduce your patting to the point that you eventually withdraw your hand to end up patting the air, then leave the room. If your baby wakes, repeat the process and stay with her/him until she/he returns to sleep. Settling Your your baby in the Cot Allow your baby to cry from 1 to 5 minutes depending on what you choose to do before intervening. Pick her/him up and burp her/him. Return baby to her/his cot and place your hand firmly on her /his chest. With your other hand start cupping and shushing. This is reassuring for your baby and establishes as much contact as possible without having to hold her/him. This is called engulfing in the cot. At this stage you can offer her/him a dummy as well. Continue cupping and shushing until baby falls asleep then gently roll her/him onto her back, continuing to pat with your hand on her/his chest. Once you sense that your baby is asleep, remove your hand from her/his chest and lighten the patting until eventually you can withdraw your hand, continuing to pat, as if patting the air. If your baby stays asleep, leave the room promptly and quietly. If, as you exit, your baby stirs or you hear her/him crying once you have left the room, return and repeat the process. If baby does not settle, you may choose to pick her/him up and settle in your arms (see above). Resettling in the cot In the beginning it is important to respond immediately when your baby begins to stir as it is easier to resettle a baby before she/he wakes too much. Eventually you will need to step back and allow her/him the ability to do this on her/his own. Respond by cupping and shushing until your baby falls asleep again, continuing to pat on her/his chest with your hand. Offer her/him a dummy as well. Once you sense that your baby is asleep, remove your hand from her/his chest and lighten the patting until eventually you can withdraw your hand, continuing to pat, as if patting the air. If your baby stays asleep, leave the room promptly and quietly. If, as you exit, your baby stirs or you hear herhim/ crying once you have left the room, return and repeat the process. If your baby does not settle, you may choose to pick her/him up and settle her/him in your arms (see above). Mixing it Up Some mothers find it easier to practice cot sleeping in the mornings when they have more energy and opt for settling their babies in their arms in the afternoon. Settling Cycle for babies under 12 weeks in a cot First Stage Cry 0 up to 5 minutes Comfort – cupping and shushing and patting and shushing. Offer a dummy and stay with your baby until she/he goes to sleep Next Stage Cry 0 to 5 minutes Comfort – cupping and shushing and patting and shushing. This is to reassure and not to put baby to sleep. Cry 1 to 5 minutes Comfort – cupping and shushing and patting and shushing. Offer a dummy and stay with baby until she/he goes to sleep. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 02 December 2013 at 9:21pm
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Hi a baby who is hungry at night will not resettle so yes you need to master the resettling during the day so that at night when she wakes you can re settle and if she doesn't then feed her. It is not about not feeding a baby during the night that is hungry is about ensuring you are not feeding just for comfort. I would also look at your daytime routine and as she is a fast feeder, I would be feeding her at least twice in her awake times. At 4.5 months her awake times will be around 2 1/4 hours and ideally she is having at least 2 naps of minimum of 1 1/2 hours and a bandaid (nana nap/power nap) at the end of the day so that her last awake time is no longer than the other awake times So the day time routine will look like this wakes, feeds, play, top up, swaddle/sleeping bag nap - resettle when she wakes. At night time I tend to resettle for the first part of the night as this is their deepest sleep so I tend to encourage them and then work on the earlier morning feeds. I never take away all the night feeds, but I have a plan to what is the first time I would wait to feed and work towards that. This doesn't always happen but it gives you a goal to work towards and yes, if you can't resettle then of course you feed. Some people suggest giving water or part of a feed, however in my experience I have found that if you cannot resettle then you do need to do a full feed. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 02 December 2013 at 9:32pm
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Hi you haven't mentioned whether you are feeding. Yes, I would suggest that you feed, play,top up, nap during the day and his awake times will be around 1 1/2 hours. His naps would ideally be a minimum of 1 1/2 hours and again resettling if he wakes before this. I have just posted earlier how to settle in arms and resettle in arms or in cot for under 12 weeks. I would suggest you read these notes and do this for ten days. Remember though what start in arms you need to be able to do in a cot. With regard to the use of the dummy ideally you try and let him self settle without the dummy and if he can't self settle then intervene with the dummy. WIth regard to resettling yes okay to give straight away, however over time you will need to step back and allow him the right to try on his own and then intervene. The top up before going for naps is as much as he wants. Some babies actually have a bigger feed as their top up so it does depend on what your baby's needs are. Resettling at his age can take up to 20 minutes however he is not left on his own to do this |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 02 December 2013 at 9:34pm
| Hi LaHood - I have tried to download a photo for you but it won't let me Ca u PM please and then I can send it to you. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 02 December 2013 at 9:42pm
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I wonder if it was the Weleda teething powder as it has a lactose base. I have posted to earlier answers general guidelines on introducing solids, vegetables and suggested routines. I would have a look and see if any of these are of help. If you feel your question hasn't been answered fully please PM and I will be happy to answer you At six months it is a personal choice whether she is sleeping in your room or her own. IN my experience I move the baby out when I start to disturb their sleep or when they disturb mine. Cereal in my experience is mixed with milk - makes it taste nicer and also then the baby is not missing out of any nutrients and fat from her normal milk intake. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 02 December 2013 at 9:44pm
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Does your son have dry skin, cradle cap. I would try and use the snow angel swaddle that I demonstrated on the day. You can see it on OHbaby's! website . If you can not find it then please PM me and I will find out how you can access it. D |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 02 December 2013 at 9:47pm
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HI Betsy The way to stretch her out is to resettle or do what you are doing with regard to having her on you. It takes time and at 11 weeks, she is doing really well. I would suggest that her daytime routine is feed, play, top up, nap and see if this helps.df To transfer from carseat to cot is just teaching her to resettle - again this takes time but she will learn how to do this I have already posted notes on how to settle and resettle for under 12 weeks so hopefully these will help you. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 02 December 2013 at 9:51pm
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Hi Melissa YOu haven't mentioned how you are feeding but this would be a guideline for you to work towards. At 4 months ideally his awake time is around 2 to 2 1/4 stretching out to 3 hours by the time he is six months. Ideally he is having either 3 naps a day of approx 1 1/2 hours or 2 naps of 1 1/2 hours with one band aid at the end of the day so that he is not overtired to start his night time routine. Until you take the time to teach him how to resettle during his daytime naps then you cannot really expect him to resettle over night. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 02 December 2013 at 9:52pm
| Hi I have already posted general guideline routines for this age and also information on solids and vegetables so please take a look (you may have already done this). If you feel these do not answer your question please PM me and I will be happy to do this |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 02 December 2013 at 9:55pm
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Hi some babies at this age do go down to one nap. I tend to encourage the afternoon nap to be their main one as this avoids them being overtired to go down at night. In my experience I do a band aid (power nap/nana nap) in the morning and then bring the afternoon nap to around 1 t o 1.30pm and having him in bed by 6.30 - 7.00pm |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 02 December 2013 at 9:56pm
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Hi yes a lot of questions, but I love it. I think I have answered your questions with posting for previous ones. I would suggest that you look at the settling and resettling notes and if you feel I haven't answered your question please PM and I will look at it. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 02 December 2013 at 9:57pm
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Hi Ladies Thank you for all your questions and hopefully the answers will help you. It was lovely to meet you all at the OHBaby Coffee Catchup. Remember before you do anything STOP, THINK, and ACT – work out what you are doing, why you are doing, and what you are trying to accomplish and then act. Remember YOU are the baby’s mum and so listen to your heart and instinct. Yes, we all don’t do it by the book, or get it right the first time, but you need to make ‘mistakes’ to get it right for you. It’s a time of learning a little person’s personality and figuring out what works for your home life. If you have the time I would love to see you pop over to http://www.facebook.com/BabyWithin and 'like' it. You can then keep up with information that I post from time to time or hear from other mothers who write on the wall. Also there is now a “recommendations’ section and it would great to hear your comments. Please remember as a parent or carer that you should understand and acknowledge that Dorothy is NOT a licensed medical doctor or other licensed medical provider and the information that I share with you has come from experience and working with numerous families and babies and toddlers |
Posted By: Dichat77266832
Date Posted: 25 March 2021 at 11:06am
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