Child becoming obsessed with their weight
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Category: General Chat
Forum Name: General Chat
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URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=46808
Printed Date: 21 August 2025 at 11:27am
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Topic: Child becoming obsessed with their weight
Posted By: Lily234088
Subject: Child becoming obsessed with their weight
Date Posted: 10 October 2018 at 7:28pm
I'm not entirely sure if this is the best forum, I was a member 10 years ago while pregnant, the members of this site supported me through fertility issues, miscarriage, pregnancy, a horrific birth, PND and a child that was awake for 18 months and her multiple surgeries.
My small person is now planning her 10th birthday party. I'm now a single working mum, but that's a positive thing for us :) Her father loves her and is involved with a loving step mother.
I have created a problem. I was a chubby child, bullied badly by both friends and family and subsequently developed a case of what I'm told is Body Dysmorphic Disorder. I'm utterly obsessed with my weight. I'm a size 10, but still starve myself on a regular basis because I see something in the mirror that apparently isn't there.
Anyhoo, my post isn't about me, it's about what I've done to my daughter, and what I can do to keep her safe.
I'm a WW member, and she's seen me at weigh ins. She's seen me weigh myself daily since she could crawl.
She's a completely normal and healthy kid. She's now comparing herself to all the girls at school who are smaller. I've found her weighing herself and looking up "healthy weights" online. She ran into the kitchen on Sunday and announced she'd lost 1kg. My heart broke and I realised what a hideous thing I have done. So many of us doubt ourselves when we're new mothers, but this really defined me as a terrible parent. I never even saw what I was doing to her. I feel disgusted in myself.
I left WW, I've removed the scales from the house, I now eat breakfast with her, I have a small dinner with her when she eats in the evenings. I can't eat a full meal as early as she does, I'd throw it up. I can hardly force back the small meal that I do make so she sees me eat. We've talked about health instead of weight, we go out and have active fun without the intention of exercise. She see's magazines, we looked at the online vids showing photoshop time lapse so she could see it's fake. We talk about how every person is different, how body size and shape mean nothing. We talk about how important it is to feel good about the kind of person you are and how you treat people, not the way you look. These conversations happen when the topic comes up, they are not daily and only driven by her.
I know this is my fault, but I'm asking for any advice perhaps from parents with older children, how do I stop this? How do I stop my gorgeous girl from thinking there is something wrong when she is absolutely perfect.
Sorry for the novel. I thought I would be a good Mum, I've given her my curse instead.
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Replies:
Posted By: Rosemary
Date Posted: 26 October 2018 at 4:26pm
Hello, dear!
Don't say that it's a "curse" and you're "terrible", you're a great mom and you're doing well.
I believe that it's just a part of growing up. Girls are especially vulnerable when they reach adolescence as their body shape changes and becomes more rounded. If it worries you so much, I'd recommend you to visit a psychologist. Maybe there's something deeper than that.
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Posted By: slink235957
Date Posted: 07 February 2019 at 6:23am
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That is a big issue of modern generation. These standards which were set in social medias like IG and snapchat are destroying the mentality. I'm would like to take control over my daughter's snapchat using this app. There is https://thespyexpert.com/the-best-snapchat-spying-app/" rel="nofollow - a fantastic read about how you can do it and how to prevent mental disorder.
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Posted By: Dana253876
Date Posted: 22 October 2020 at 11:26am
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This topic seems really complicated. it's not that the child is interested in a healthy weight, fitness or healthy lifestyle. The fact is that she really takes an example from you personally. That is why you yourself must, by a willful effort, change your attitude towards excess weight and nutrition. I can't tell you about your city but there are very popular grill restaurants in Toronto. Here is https://www.hubrestaurant.ca/hub-blogs/tips-to-market-your-franchise-during-the-restart-phase/" rel="nofollow - my response to you. Their menu is based on a mix of grilled and healthy vegetable side dishes. At the same time it is fast food and is very popular with teenagers. Maybe you start visiting places like this. This would take the edge off the problem. Excellent grilled ribs are not quite the same as pizza and cola. You agree with me?
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