Supermarket Shocker
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Category: General Chat
Forum Name: General Chat
Forum Description: For mums, dads, parents-to-be, grandparents, friends -- you name it! And you name the topic you want to chat about!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4884
Printed Date: 04 October 2025 at 8:15am
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Topic: Supermarket Shocker
Posted By: Jay_R
Subject: Supermarket Shocker
Date Posted: 15 December 2006 at 9:15am
| Yesterday while at the supermaket I witnessed a mother hit her child, not one, but three times round the head. The child was crying, and cowering with his hands over his head (he was about 8 or 9 by my estimation) and was clearly in pain. She went to hit him again, for crying this time, and I said "excuse me, but don't you dare hit your child again", she told me to "F*&k off and mind my own business", and I said "you made it my business when you chose to beat your child in front of me". She stormed off, and I was left feeling angry and very sad. Angry because 1. she beat her child 2. no-one else stood up for the child, yet maybe 30 people witnessed it and 3. because I couldn't do more. I was sad because if this woman could do what she did in front of so many strangers, what the heck goes on in her home???? I wish I knew who they are so I could contact authorities...... |
Replies:
Posted By: Peace
Date Posted: 15 December 2006 at 9:20am
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OMG how scary, I have absolutely no ability to snap out of the trance I get in when I witness violence or screaming matches. Years of watching my parents do it (the screaming matches). You are so brave Clare, I am glad there is someone like yourself there willing to stop something like that. How horrific. ------------- DD1 May 2006 DD2 March 2011 DD3 August 2012 |
Posted By: EllenMumof2
Date Posted: 15 December 2006 at 9:22am
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I so hear you clare i have witnessed this before and sadly i must say i didn't say anything to the man. Its so sad that people do not have the skills to deal with these situations differently http://lilypie.com">
  http://lilypie.com">   -------------  
 
Kalem 6! |
Posted By: Nic01
Date Posted: 15 December 2006 at 9:42am
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Good on you for saying something! Like you said though, if she can do that in a crowded supermarket, it does make you wonder how the poor child gets treated at home... ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: ellabellame
Date Posted: 15 December 2006 at 10:07am
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omg, that must have been awful, that poor kid. good on you for saying something, that took some guts. ------------- |
Posted By: my2angels
Date Posted: 15 December 2006 at 10:08am
| oh just reading that makes me feel sick. Good on you for saying something |
Posted By: Andie
Date Posted: 15 December 2006 at 10:11am
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Poor kid. Good on you for saying something, Clare. If nothing else, at least the little boy knows there was someone else willing to stand up for him. Breaks yer heart, this stuff. ------------- Andie |
Posted By: Jay_R
Date Posted: 15 December 2006 at 10:16am
I got home and bawled and bawled  I don't know where that inner strength came from - i'm usually pretty non-confrontational, but I totally saw red, and could not stand by and watch what I was seeing.
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Posted By: CuriousG
Date Posted: 15 December 2006 at 10:31am
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No child ever deserves to be hit, especially around the head. I am so glad you said something. I am the kind of person who would too - now that I have a child of my own. If anything, I hope she now thinks about what she did and is perhaps embarrassed by her actions after being confronted by someone else in public. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: MyMinis
Date Posted: 15 December 2006 at 10:33am
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OMG thats horrible, Ive only ever tapped haleigh on the bottom (padded by the nappy) I could never whack my child on the head.
I wouldve said something too. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
http://tweetytweety85.bebo.com - bebo |
Posted By: Jennz
Date Posted: 15 December 2006 at 10:43am
Wow good on you! That is just so awful/sad/disgusting. At least you know that you did something about it- its better to feel upset because you said something rather than guilty that you didn't. I only hope if I was ever in the same situation I could act the same as you  ------------- Jen, Charlotte 7 & Kate 3 
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Posted By: EthansMummy
Date Posted: 15 December 2006 at 11:55am
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OMG good on you!! That is so horrible I can't stand to see that and it happens so much. I would never have the guts to say anything but man I wish I did. ------------- ** MUM TO ** Ethan 29/08/2006 Brooke 22/09/2008 |
Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 15 December 2006 at 12:00pm
| It is so sad that we live in a society that loks away from that kinda stuff - saying "not my business" and it IS ingrained in us, and difficult to talk out of, so good on you Clare for having the guts to say something. i like to think I would too, but in all honesty, have no idea. |
Posted By: caraMel
Date Posted: 15 December 2006 at 1:29pm
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That is awful.
I'm so glad you had the confidence to speak up, people need to know that what they are doing is wrong and abusive and not just discipline. I hope that woman thinks twice before she raises her hand to her child again.  Clare!------------- Mel, Mummy to E: 6, B: 4 and: 
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Posted By: Paws
Date Posted: 15 December 2006 at 3:18pm
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That's awful! Good on you for saying something! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Roksana
Date Posted: 15 December 2006 at 4:34pm
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Good on you for saying some thing...I probably would not!!
I refuse to believe that hitting is the only option left for a parent...that just awful! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Guests
Date Posted: 15 December 2006 at 5:05pm
| Yer good on you for confronting the women!! Its a shame she wasnt doing a large shop you could have called authorities when u were there. I hope she doesnt treat him any worse at home thats horrific!!! |
Posted By: miss
Date Posted: 15 December 2006 at 5:50pm
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I think you are amazing Clare. It is like the saying that goes something like - all that is needed for evil to prosper is for good men to do nothing. Well, yesterday you stood up against that happening. I hope we all draw from your strength and stand up to bullies when we see them too. -------------  
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Posted By: Bombshell
Date Posted: 16 December 2006 at 7:25am
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good on you for saying something - i find i have a stern look that normally works without need to say anything at all...years of practice...
Otherwise I would have mentioned the need to call the police to refer her to cyfs etc...as the mere mention can often be enough to make them think, or if really concerned go get number plate of vehicle and report them via that method. Im sorry but it seems to be island families that hit kids across head and esp on ears (i work with DOm violence every day) and there are studies on it showing that ear problems are prevalent as a result...no idea why they hit the head really but if i see it the look i give them makes them coil away! and usually stop - in public at least....what goes on in the home is usually far worse Im afraid. |
Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 16 December 2006 at 10:28am
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actually when i was in Japan, it was common practice for teachers and parents to smack kids across the head/ears. THey saw smacking the bum as a bit barberic!
When i taught my "chibiko" classes (2-4 years( when the kids misbehaved it was horrible watching them get smacked. when i mentioned my concner to the boss, i was told to mind my own business and not be so ethnocentric. lovely huh! |
Posted By: MyMinis
Date Posted: 16 December 2006 at 11:48am
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I would prefer a tap on the bottom personally to being hit across the head.
My parents only ever did a tap to the bum if we were really naughty, with hand and hand only. My parents didnt believe in smacking children with lots of force or in any other place other than the bottom with anything but a hand. I remember every single smack I got. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
http://tweetytweety85.bebo.com - bebo |
Posted By: james
Date Posted: 16 December 2006 at 6:04pm
we got smacked on the bottom only with a hand and only if we were relly naughty and i remeber every smack i got and i am tottaly normal ------------- <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b4.lilypie.com/nLJ5p13.png" alt="Lilypie 4th Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a> |
Posted By: Bombshell
Date Posted: 17 December 2006 at 8:59am
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i have no objection to a quick bum or hand smack...esp if it shocks the kid into stopping what it was doing and nothign more is needed.
I do think the head thing is cultural unfortunately. |
Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 17 December 2006 at 9:13am
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I don't remember every smack I got....i do remember the wooden spoon breaking on my bum though. differnet time though., I mean, i got smacked ALL the time when i was little, but i don't think it did me any harm in particular. i don't believe in smacking my boys, mainly because most of the time they misbehave, it's hitting each other, or me (i have some wicked nasty bruises from them) and it seems hypocritical to say "don;t hit" - whack. For us, time out works really well. Smacking Jake - he laughs and thinks its a game. the only child I know who when he bit my mother, she bit him back and he LAUGHED!
But i think there is a major differnece between smacking and what Clare saw. |
Posted By: yalanna
Date Posted: 17 December 2006 at 12:52pm
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Clare, that was really brave of you. Good on you. My mum works for CYFS and its horrible the stories that she tells us. Some people should never be allowed to have kids.
Im not against smacking around the bum or a tap on the hand, but around the head is disgusting. It shows a total lack of control. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Roksana
Date Posted: 19 December 2006 at 9:59am
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I must admit I got smacked when I was younger and I dont think it made me a bad person or affected me in any majot way but I totally dont agree with smacking like that...
These days Zaara has learned to scratch if she gets mad and after telling her NO and she still does it...I smack her hand lightly....she looks at me and just goes on playing......untill the next day at kindy....arrrggg 
But I promised myself that no matter what I will never hit my kids in a manner that they remember it for the rest of their life...I remember all of my major smacks!! ------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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