what are you doing? (ranty)
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Topic: what are you doing? (ranty)
Posted By: Andie
Subject: what are you doing? (ranty)
Date Posted: 12 February 2007 at 4:46pm
My pet hate right now is being asked... "WHAT ARE YOU DOING THIS WEEK?", "WHAT HAVE YOU GOT PLANNED FOR TODAY?" or any variations of those. And while sometimes a friend who is working full-time will ask this, it's when my mum and sister ask (because that's how they're starting conversations these days) that really gets to me - probably because they always ask (not to hear the answer, but to tell me what they're doing). I know - it's not a rude question, and yes, maybe it annoys me so much more because I'm once again trying out the minipill (don't think it's going too well, eh!) and everything is annoying me more, but I'm a SAHM... What the heck do they think the answer to that question is?!? For want of a better answer I end up saying something like 'er, the usual, I'm housewifing it today' or if I've got a playgroup or something on I'll say I'm off to that. I'm not about to list every little chore that somehow fills up the whole day and keeps me busy enough! The result is that my family swing between thinking I'm incredibly boring and sit at home cleaning and watching TV all week and no longer have anything interesting to say about anything, or that I spend all week flitting about on coffee dates (leading to the time honoured tradition my mother has of telling me how she didn't have it anywhere near as easy). If I'm asked once more I'm going to go postal at whoever the unsuspecting person is. Most likely a family member, any one of which would frankly would deserve getting their head bitten off anyway (issues, issues). Anyway, this really annoys me (he he... I keep having to go back while I type and delete my language... am making an effort to clean it up now for Ella!) because when I was working, no-one ever asked that and never needed to. It was a given that I was busy working all week. Now that I'm working at being a mum and looking after this house, it's like people think I'm not 'doing' anything. GRRRRRR! ------------- Andie |
Replies:
Posted By: Andie
Date Posted: 12 February 2007 at 4:50pm
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------------- Andie |
Oh my gosh.... how embarrassing. I clicked on the button to post that, then it crossed my mind that I think I posted pretty much the same rant a while ago. I remember thinking about it... dunno if I did though. It was probably the last time I tried the minipill, too, come to think of it! Sorry!Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 12 February 2007 at 4:59pm
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Well Andie, all I can say to that is,
"What are you doing today???" *ducks for cover* tee hee -------------  |
Posted By: james
Date Posted: 12 February 2007 at 5:59pm
you meaine lol busymum ------------- <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b4.lilypie.com/nLJ5p13.png" alt="Lilypie 4th Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a> |
Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 12 February 2007 at 6:24pm
Grrr it really does get me too. Umm yea my to-do list today is grocery shopping, doing the dishes, and I'd really like to 'fit' a sleep in there sometime too. Sounds lame in my own ears let alone the insentives out there! Fortunately I don't have much trouble with in-laws about that but... I have my sister. Is that worse or what? 
But I love to tease Andie  ------------- |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 12 February 2007 at 6:35pm
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Was about to say the same thing Teresa
I wish I had nothing to do. I wish I could stay at home all day every day (although you could guarantee the house wouldn't be any tidier than it is now but in between taking Maya to preschool, the gremlins docs appts and all these 'lunches' I've been doing (apparently that's what us SAHM Mums do - lunch ) I actually have to SCHEDULE days at home. Go figure - I thought the point of being a SAHM was to SAH!
Anyways, off topic, sorry... ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 12 February 2007 at 8:02pm
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I hate people asking me that oo.. well my mum especially.. cos even after i've said "well i've worked 4 days in a row and ihave 1 day off before 3 more" she'll still go "oh, so when am i going to see you?" hello lady - i have 1 day, to spend with my kids.. 1day. if you want to see me get off your butt and come see me... he he..
but Andie - you know what question really gets to me.. both when i was a full time SAHm and a less-than-full-time SAHM.. and now when i have days off.. is when someone (not naming names here) comes home and says "so, what have you done today?" sometimes i call his bluff and say i sat on my A... and ate chocolate. (really, it's the truth but how dare he imply that.. he he) ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja 
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Posted By: meow
Date Posted: 12 February 2007 at 8:23pm
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Ah, the easy lives us SAHM's lead aye ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 12 February 2007 at 8:31pm
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Yeah, I always feel that is a loaded question if it comes from dh/dp etc, or the what have you done today? It could actually mean that, but I always see the mess ont he bench or the unvaccummed carpet and think that is what he means... ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: Andie
Date Posted: 12 February 2007 at 8:34pm
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You better duck for cover, Busymum 'cause I'm coming over tomorrow with my attitide set at full volume!! Mwah ha ha haaaaaa! OK I promise not to angrily rant. Seriously though, I'm just going to tell my family that it really (trying to think of a non-swear way to say 'pisses me off') when they ask that, that they didn't ask me that when I was working, so I don't like what it implies when they ask me now. No doubt even if I say it in my nicest tone or even just made a joke of it like I didn't mean it (but I won't take that route!) they'd get all upset! Maybe my rant should really be about family with issues right now, anyway. ------------- Andie |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 12 February 2007 at 9:08pm
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LOL Willie would be waaaaaay to scared to come home and ask me what I've done all day - that would be a month-long ticket to the spare room! ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: Kels
Date Posted: 12 February 2007 at 11:51pm
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LOL ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs |
Posted By: ellabellame
Date Posted: 13 February 2007 at 7:35am
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i know what you mean andie!
i hate it when people ask that, another pet hate is "what've you been up to?" which i get all the time. well duh, i've been doing exactly the same thing i was doing when you last asked me that! and haha emma, glad to see you've got willie well trained. ------------- |
Posted By: james
Date Posted: 13 February 2007 at 8:06am
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i hate so hen are you going back to work as son as i can find a job that pays anuff to surport me and my son then i will ------------- <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b4.lilypie.com/nLJ5p13.png" alt="Lilypie 4th Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a> |
Posted By: EthansMummy
Date Posted: 13 February 2007 at 1:04pm
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Yip I am in the "So what have you done all day boat" My DH doesn't notice that they carpet is vaccumed and the washing is done, folded and put away, that the floors have been scrubed....etc, etc. Thankfully after the last time it was an exteremly quite two nights with me ignoring him and he hasn't said it since!!!! Bloody men. ------------- ** MUM TO ** Ethan 29/08/2006 Brooke 22/09/2008 |
Posted By: Andie
Date Posted: 13 February 2007 at 1:17pm
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My gripe isn't with hubby (well, this gripe isn't!) but with women who should know better - especially my mother whose been a SAHM for some time herself so should remember how pathetic it makes you feel when someone says 'what you been up to' and you have to say 'lots of laundry, dishes, cooking, vaccuming, dusting... oh yeah, and I got thrown up on 3 times and pooped on once". Do people really want to know this stuff?!? ------------- Andie |
Posted By: Andie
Date Posted: 13 February 2007 at 1:19pm
...come to think of it though, I guess I've always held off from listing what's kept me busy for the day because it'd make for a boring conversation - but if I DO do that, people will soon stop asking!  ------------- Andie |
Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 13 February 2007 at 1:19pm
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i got sick of hearing it as well so i went back to work (where i didnt have to see them haha) fulltime, now ive cut my hours down to 30 and i hear the question again but not as often cos when they ask me i LOOK at them really angrily and say "i pulled out 3 teeth did two rootcanals and 5 fillings then came home and hung out with a grumpy 4 year old....how about u?"
btw lol "housewifing it" i like that |
Posted By: Leish
Date Posted: 13 February 2007 at 1:33pm
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Well - i'm not a SAHM mum yet - well I guess I am cos I am a mum but I just don't have a child at home with me yet - but if anyone asked me what I have been up to today, I would have to blush and say that I only just woke up!! ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 13 February 2007 at 6:25pm
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dont blush leish...say it proudly " my job is as a dream analyser and as part of my research i am required to sleep in during the day "
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Posted By: linda
Date Posted: 13 February 2007 at 7:21pm
| I'm weary of the 'what are you up to today'....my reply 'oh nothing' and then being asked to babysit! I've learnt to cover myself so I have an 'out' if they want me to do something I don't want to do. |
Posted By: Andie
Date Posted: 13 February 2007 at 7:33pm
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So true... so true. Being a SAHM means my time is so much more flexible than when I was working, so I have been expected to do extra stuff sometimes. I don't run all of our errands but would be happy to and I do do most of them, but I've been weary of the 'can you drop my daughter off at her piano lesson', 'can you pick me up... from another town!', 'can you water my garden' requests. Hmph! ------------- Andie |
Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 14 February 2007 at 7:57am
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Glad I haven't had those! ------------- |
Posted By: caraMel
Date Posted: 14 February 2007 at 8:24am
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Its so annoying how people think staying home with your kids means you're free to call upon anytime.
My biggest falling out with MIL to date was when she decided I was free to babysit her international student at last minute notice 4 days in a row. Aside from the fact that he was rude and demanding and kept pushing my daughter over, I really objected to her assumption that I had nothing to do for the next four days and was happy to not only play tourguide and hostess to him but finance the tours and feed him as well! Anyway, I now ignore my phone unless I'm in the mood for a chat and have been known to ignore unannounced visitors at my door as well. Thank goodness for peepholes! Don't people realise that after you have a baby, there is NEVER a good time to just pop by to visit people?!? ------------- Mel, Mummy to E: 6, B: 4 and: 
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Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 14 February 2007 at 9:08am
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That's the one that gets me big time and it's usually my family or in-laws! Will they ever 'get' to ring first??? I don't mind if it's a planned visit but if the kids are asleep and I need a break, I *will* take one!!
Or someone will come and it's fine for 1/2 hour and then an hour maybe, and then even though I'm "not doing anything" today, I do need to organise dinner or the washing etc.... or don't you get that it's been a busy week and that's *why* we're at home doing nothing today?? Guess I had better stop now lol ------------- |
Posted By: Rachael21
Date Posted: 14 February 2007 at 8:17pm
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I hate the "So what do you do with yourself these days"
I got asked where I was working when Jack was 6 days old. My friend had an op 3 weeks ago and keeps asking when i'm going to visit her, I actually don't have a spare day for ages and when I do it would be nice to stay at home so I could hopefully lie down for 5 mins. |