Mind your own business!!!
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Category: General Chat
Forum Name: General Chat
Forum Description: For mums, dads, parents-to-be, grandparents, friends -- you name it! And you name the topic you want to chat about!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=6133
Printed Date: 05 April 2026 at 11:42pm
Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 12.05 - http://www.webwizforums.com
Topic: Mind your own business!!!
Posted By: kellverona
Subject: Mind your own business!!!
Date Posted: 12 March 2007 at 5:01pm
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Hiya ladies,
Just wanted to share with you my disgust in some people. only so small but it really upset me. Glenn and I were walking probably 10 metres to the car while carrying jaxon and some old lady yelled out quite abruptly "Wheres that babys hat!!!" She made me sooooo mad. Glenn just said to her we were going straight to the car and she replied "Good!!!" Gees its not as though we were leaving him in the sun to play, still she should mind her own business. It just makes me so angry when people, particulary strangers say things like that. Im a great Mum to Jaxon and she needs to mind he own business. I wish I had of said something to her now. Too slow. I think I was just flabergasted.(spelling??) ------------- http://pregnancyplanet.net/tickers/"> 
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Replies:
Posted By: caraMel
Date Posted: 12 March 2007 at 5:16pm
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How rude!
I hate it when people make comments like that without even knowing what they're on about. Strangers can be so annoying. ------------- Mel, Mummy to E: 6, B: 4 and: 
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Posted By: Lulu
Date Posted: 12 March 2007 at 5:20pm
Ahhhh! I hate that!  Self righteous nosy busy bodies who think they have a right to pass comment! Doesn't the saying go - 'Let he who has not sinned cast the first stone!' ------------- Lou http://www.babysfirstsite.com"> 
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Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 12 March 2007 at 5:31pm
| If someone said that to me I'd tell them it was up their arse and continue walking lol |
Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 12 March 2007 at 7:25pm
I hate comments like that - assumptions and plain rudeness. It catches me offguard too and then I spend the next two days thinking up an awesome answer! 
I had my little sister to stay over a Sunday/Monday when she was 6, her mum had her off school for the day. We (me, my sis, and 2 daughters at the time) went up town to the bank and some lady walking past took me for task about not having "my daughter" enrolled in school to look after the little ones! I too was flabergasted, angry and even a bit shaken about what people do and think sometimes  -------------  |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 12 March 2007 at 8:01pm
Me too! Don't you hate that! ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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busymum wrote:Posted By: Bubbaloo
Date Posted: 12 March 2007 at 8:51pm
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I hate it when older ladies that walk past me when I'm pushing the pram and look at my fingers to see of there any ring's when they see that there isn't any the give me this disgusted look. Jesse was saying the other day that they do it when he is with us too. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  Was danni-chick Mum to James My Angel 28/07/08 |
Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 12 March 2007 at 8:56pm
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How Rude!!
I had a similar experience when Jacob was wee. My remote for unlocking the car wasn't working, so I left jacob in his carset in the supermarket trolly next to the car while I turned to unlock the door to put him in. This middle ages lady camr racing over and was sheliding his eyes, yelling at me that the sun was on him and burning his wee eyes. FFS, lady, I was just unlocking the car to put him in it, not leaving him there while I swanned off down the pub to play pokies and drink beer.  ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: SMoody
Date Posted: 12 March 2007 at 9:21pm
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Oh dont let me start on people like that. You know how everyone wrap newborns up nice and tight even in summer? Well McKayla till this day will really overheat extremely quickly but her feet and hands are always cold.
So she was never cuddled up as such. They always use to come up and say poor baby look how cold she is and then procede to touch her feet. And then tell me you must keep her chest really warm. Freaking morones. My child literally would die of heat. Even in winter this poor kid can overheat so quickly. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: BaAsKa
Date Posted: 13 March 2007 at 7:40am
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oh i hear ya!!! iv had so many of these comments from the nosey old bats at the supermarket here!! well just one inparticular i just wanna....anyway! when ever she is packing our groceries she always has to comment on the food that weve bought (yeah yeah yeah im a choccy fan now! but thats none of her bussiness!!) and tells us that its not good for our weight blahblahblah!! and yesterday she picked up our chocolate marshy eggs () and pronounced that they were yuck and walked off to the shelf to change them!!!
GGGRRR! these people musnt have lives of their own!!
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Posted By: kellverona
Date Posted: 13 March 2007 at 8:11am
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Your kidding me!! unbelievable!!! I think I need to start thinking up some good lines to use on people like that now! Smoody I know exactly where your coming from too. Jaxon is such a hot boy even when it was cold hed have a sweaty patch under his neck and he was not wrapped at that time. Wish people would mind their own business. ------------- http://pregnancyplanet.net/tickers/">
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Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 13 March 2007 at 9:03am
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oooh another blood boiler that I had forgotten about, and I get alot of now is "gosh, they go out and about with their young babies very early now, don't they" "in our day, you stayed at home for a month or so before you took them out" and the like. Would you like to do my groceries and pay my bills grandma? ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 13 March 2007 at 9:04am
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Woo hoo!! 2000 posts!! AND they always say it as an "aside" like you are deaf and you can't hear them... ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 13 March 2007 at 10:25am
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I had that last week in the supemarket "oh your baby is young" "yes, he's 3 weeks old" "thats a bit young to be taking him out" "why" "he might pick up bugs" "well thats good for their immune system" I then walked off. If I stayed at home all day everyday I would go mad. Yet my nana was so happy that I was out with Joshua at 2 weeks. Both Andrew and Joshua are hot babies, so they don't need all the layers on in the world. Andrew would often in the winter just have a skivvy or long sleeve t on. When out shopping I would be told that my boy needs a jersey on. To that I would reply and kill him by over heating him. Thanks but no thanks. I know my child and know what is best for him. Teresa I had some lady nearly 3 years ago tell me that I was wrong for having my 17 year old sister out of school to help look after Andrew. Hello she was at school she had finished for the day (being year 13 she had last period off and would often come to my place and then we would go into town together) and what is it to you. ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: daikini
Date Posted: 13 March 2007 at 11:14am
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I got asked how long I had been nannying when I was walking my brother and sister to school one day with Kiya in the pushchair - Kiya was about 10mths, DS was 9 and DB was 7. I just smiled and said "Actually, that's my brother and sister, and this one is mine." and kept walking. ------------- Becca, mum of 2 girls & 3 boys |
Posted By: Mazzy
Date Posted: 13 March 2007 at 11:40am
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Oh I hate this...especially when they say it to your baby instead of you, and you're standing right there "Your mummy should wrap you up much warmer shouldn't she? Yes she should!" ARRGGH!
It really ticks me off when people tell me I shouldn't be out and about so much with the baby, especially people in older generations who had lots of help from family to do things for them. We don't have that support, so don't have the choice! I'll get off my ranty soap box now
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Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 13 March 2007 at 12:02pm
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give the old ladies a break... most of them are well meaning. we shouldnt assume either. kellverona that lady might have been asking in case it had been lost, and baysmum if she is packing the groceries perhaps she meant the pack was squashed or something... and danni chick maybe you just think they are giving you dirty looks, most old peoples eyesight isnt that good so wouldnt be able to see a ring anyway...
old people in my opinion arent generally being nasty and they can only go on what they used to know... so i just smile and nod and hope they go home happy thinking about the baby or kid they met... ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
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Posted By: Kelpa
Date Posted: 13 March 2007 at 1:27pm
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He he this makes me laugh...I have had my fair share of comments..I have the most picky....old fashioned Grandma you could have full of funny old values and ideas!! (of course way different to mine). I love her to bits tho but she drives me nuts sometimes all the same.
I used to get really annoyed and bite back at her much to my Grandfathers disgust. One day he told me I should be a bit more understanding. It would end up hurting Grandmas feelings and getting me worked up for ages. AND ....Ya know what?..I find as much and all as it is really hard to do ..its easier now to just smile, say nothing, dont take it personally and believe that they are doing/saying it because they care and know no different. -------------  
 
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Posted By: Bubbaloo
Date Posted: 13 March 2007 at 1:41pm
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I found it's not the old ladies that do it they are always very nice and always comment on James and I always take the time to talk to them.
I was meaning more ladies in their 40-50's. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> Was danni-chick Mum to James My Angel 28/07/08 |
Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 13 March 2007 at 1:42pm
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I just remembered my hat story. We were out one Saturday morning in winter - but not the coldest of winter - with Hannah who was 6-8 months. "That baby should have a hat on!" Well they were probably right but at that stage Hannah would always pull her hats off, it was quite frustrating so I bundled her up all over with a blanket, cuddled her close, and made our outing brief. ------------- |
Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 13 March 2007 at 2:23pm
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My mum is a shocker, she always says "in our day you had to bath them every day, thats what you did" and "in our day they slept on their sides" etc (charlotte actualyl sleeps on her tummy) and so on. I know she is just saying what they did in their day, but sometimes I *feel* like it is a dig, and the other (hormoney and very sleep deprived) day I turned around and said "yes and in your day you both used to smoke in the car at the same time with the windows up, and inside, and I had bad asthma, and nowadays that is tantmount to child abuse, so things change, don't they"... ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: Myamy
Date Posted: 14 March 2007 at 9:39am
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O poor you Jacobsmama! My mums the best, she shakes her head and states all the things that are different. but only because she wishes things were this way when she had us kids! But lol good on you for your smoking comment. Hopefully that makes her think twice before commenting again!!!
I havent come across any busy bodies yet but i do get alot of dirty looks from strangers as i live in Gizzy which is FULL of teenage mums and i must admit i look like one (look young for my age, got asked for id when buying wine last week  ) but anyway back on track, people presume because i look young i cant possibly cant have the "right lifestyle" to raise a child!! Most times i just crack a huuuge smile at them and they try and hide but some days it really bugs me to be judges just on my apperance! (sp?)
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Posted By: Kelpa
Date Posted: 14 March 2007 at 11:59am
Its good to grow some think skin these days aye!
 -------------
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Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 14 March 2007 at 4:30pm
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Myamy - your comment about gisborne cracked me up. I go to the free women's clinic for my injection and the first time they said
"are you with a partner?" "yes. i'm married" "and do you have intercuorse with anyone else?" "ahh, no" stunned silence "..and the children'd fathers?, where are they?" "HE is at home - my husband" another stunned silence My mate reckons they have me as "patient of the year" on some placard! |
Posted By: .Mel
Date Posted: 14 March 2007 at 5:31pm
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I get quite pointed comments and looks when I'm out with my kids, my son is Maori and quite dark skinned, and is 11 and nearly 6 ft! My daughter is 4, long blonde hair and stunning blue eyes. My husband is your average kiwi bloke, brown hair/blue eyes. Myself; I'm olive skinned in the summer and just your average jo in the winter.
I'll never forget the lady who said asked me if Conor was a foster child  to which I of course replied no he's my son.. "oh he doesn't look anything like you or his sister" I learnt over the past 11 years to just swallow it and walk on... admittedly I'm finding it harder now to contain myself in front of the kids because he hears these comments and the difference is getting more noticeable... ------------- Mr Mellow (16) Miss Attitude (8) Destructa Kid (3) 
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Posted By: Myamy
Date Posted: 14 March 2007 at 7:59pm
| The question i always get asked and always floored is "is this your first" im holy gees i look young! how many do u expect me to have??? |
Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 14 March 2007 at 9:10pm
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I've been taken aback recently because when I go out with Briona and Krystiana people think they are my only two. It's a pretty easy assumption to make but it flaws me sometimes when people say "gosh you must be busy with these two" lol if only they knew... ------------- |
Posted By: pepsi
Date Posted: 14 March 2007 at 10:26pm
| Personally I haven't had any comments from strangers yet but geez I can't believe how common it is! Some people are so rude it makes me angry hearing about it happening to you ladies. I am the sort of person who would not tolerate it and would definitely say something back that's for sure.. In fact, if it does happen, heaven help whoever has the nerve!!! |
Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 15 March 2007 at 7:49am
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i think often when something happens you are just so stunned thinking
"did they just say what I think they did?" that all smart-a*se comments fly out the window..and then as someone else said, you spend weeks thinking about the clever coemments you COULD have said. |
Posted By: MummyFreckle
Date Posted: 15 March 2007 at 10:59am
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Its not just strangers though - like Jacobsmama, my mum can be a bit of a shocker at times too. I know that she doesnt mean it, but just doesnt think. The latest one is about me giving birth - one of my personal favourite quotes is "You arent going to have one of those silly epidural things are you?"....to which I have repsonded quite forcefully that we (me and DH) will do whatever we choose to do that is right for me and the baby. I know that she understands this, but cant help giving helpful suggestions about what she did when she was pregnant with me and my brother (hmmmm I am 30 he is 28...so a few things MAY have changed!!! This morning it was about rubbing vaseline on my nipples all through the pregnancy - to make them nice and soft for breastfeeding. I dont know whether this is a good suggestion or not - but the thought of smearing vaseline on my nipples at the moment makes me want to hurl!!!! ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: peanut butter
Date Posted: 15 March 2007 at 1:06pm
| I got told by one of my workmates that women shouldnt have epidurals. They should all have to go through the pain or they wont appreciate their babies....I just looked at her and said " are you for real?" |
Posted By: daikini
Date Posted: 15 March 2007 at 2:03pm
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Aggghhh!!! I know she means well but my mother is driving me nuts!
Josiah doesn't talk much. He can talk, and knows quite a few words, but isn't really a chatterbox or anything like that (those of you that have met Kiya will understand why - she talks enough for anyone!) The last couple of times I've talked to Mum, she's asked about Josiah's speech before suggesting that I might want to consider getting his developement checked out! If she'd actually listen to me, she would have noticed I keep saying "yeah, Josiah can talk. He's spot on for all his developmental goals and no one is worried about him" The thing that annoys me the most is Mum obviously isn't even listening to Josiah - yeah, he doesn't say much but when he comes out with a new word its nearly always incrediably close to perfect, so even if he's not speaking Josiah is definitely listening. ------------- Becca, mum of 2 girls & 3 boys |
Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 15 March 2007 at 2:51pm
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becca that sounds like gabriel - not a big talker at all. luckily my mum has never been too bad about my parenting choices, most of which i know she doesnt agree with - but she doesnt nag and she always said about gabriel and his speech "it will come in his own time." ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker">
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Posted By: Bel
Date Posted: 15 March 2007 at 3:45pm
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Hah this is funny. I am 7 weeks pregnant with my first child. I have just started telling people and the thing that is annoying me this week is the number of people who then say "Oh yeah I knew you were"... "Oh yes you look like you are". I have not put on any weight, or changed body shape in the last 2 years, but now all of a sudden people think they can comment on my little belly (that I have had for the last 2 years also)
------------- Mum to two beautiful kids
Luke (09.11.2007) Amy (01.04.2009) |
Posted By: caraMel
Date Posted: 15 March 2007 at 3:53pm
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Hehehe Bel, I got that from people too when I was pregnant with my daughter! 7 months later and those same people were saying to me "Gosh you're so tiny, you'd hardly know you were pregnant at all!"
ETA: Congratulations on your pregnancy by the way! ------------- Mel, Mummy to E: 6, B: 4 and:
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Posted By: Guests
Date Posted: 15 March 2007 at 4:58pm
Same here i must glare at people before they have the indecency to say something lol I never even had people touching my tummy or really asking questions LOL hehe But it does peeve me off that there are people out there that feel they need to "mother" someone so they pick on the mums with new babies!!! |