To find out or to wait
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Category: Pregnant
Forum Name: Pregnancy
Forum Description: Pregnant! Wanting to chat to other mums-to-be (or dads-to-be)? Share your thoughts, experiences, and ideas... This is that place!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7533
Printed Date: 26 August 2025 at 9:09pm
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Topic: To find out or to wait
Posted By: MyBelly
Subject: To find out or to wait
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 10:41am
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Hi every1,
Me and DF are having very heated debates lately over whether to find out what we are having or not, i think it would be the most amazing suprise but he thinks from a "practical" view that we should know, he already has a daughter so we have plenty of girly things, and i dont see the need to know and was just wanting to get a few things in pink and blue but mainly pastals like green and yellow, etc. what has everyone else done and whats some advice for me?? |
Replies:
Posted By: my4beauties
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 10:49am
Hi mybelly. We tried to find out with our first 2 children, but couldn't see both times . I came out of those scans quite disappointed. However, when bubs popped out it was awesome having that surprise!! Yes it helps to know when setting up baby's room & buying clothes, but we just got a few unisex clothes & the minute baby was born we got sooo many clothes in either pink or blue so didn't need to worry so much about what the baby was going to wear.
With this one, we were going to try & find out once again what it was, but then I decided that I liked the surprise at the end instead & didn't ask to see what it was. My hubby wanted to know everytime, but this time I said no, we have a name for both boy & girl & plenty of unisex clothes now too. Not sure if this helps!! But just my experience anyway  . ------------- My babies: R (9),G (7), J (5) http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: bookwyrm
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 10:58am
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DF and I both want to know. Even though, everyone says that your first should be a surprise, I think we are far too impatient, and just have to know. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 11:02am
| We have found out for a few reasons: We are impatient as anything. We wanted to know what colour to paint the room (even though we ended up choosing a unisex colour) and also wanted to know what colour clothes etc. I personally don't like most of the unisex clothes, it gets a bit boring and didn't want to just wait til he was here to go for a good shop for clothes either. |
Posted By: ShellandBella
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 11:06am
Me and DH found out and I think it helped both of us 'bond' with our baby being first time parents. Also, it was practical because it was easier to sort out clothes, etc. I remember my sis didn't find out with her first and got sick of dressing her daughter in blue clothes and her baby getting mistaken for the wrong sex! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: ellabellame
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 11:32am
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we found out with mikey and it was really good because then we could tell everyone and we got given some reeeally cute boys stuff when he was born but in saying that, it did take something away from the actual moment of birth. ------------- |
Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 12:24pm
I waited to find out and it was kinda cool having that suprise at the birth  As far as clothes go, it didn't really matter as I had mostly unisex newborn stuff and just bought girlie stuff later on (or dressed her in "boy" clothes)
Next time (?!?! wtf?!?) I think I'd find out... just to have both experiences. |
Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 1:30pm
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I've had both, and personally my advice would be wait... I really don't thnk it made me bond more with Charly than Jacob, honestly, I personally (and not judging here, ladies) think the whole "bonding" thing is a crock of $hite. You will bond with your baby just fine, I promise!! I'm really a don't open the pressy till xmas kinda girl... (only found out wiht #2 to tell my dying dad) ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: NovemberMum
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 1:39pm
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I want this baby to be a surprised my husband isnt too fusssed. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 2:00pm
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Our first we wanted to and couldn't until the last scan 4 days before I had him and I was too angry to even bother finding out. Second I had to know as I wanted to buy Huggies for a boy or girl and so we could paint the bedroom the right colour. If we have a next one not sure will have to get back to you. ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: megrac
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 2:05pm
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i have found out with my two previous pg but with this one couldnt tell and i am quite excited about having the suprise i must say with the other two i did miss the "congrags it a girl" when baby came out no one said anything because we all ready new thay were girls was kinda weird i did ask just to make sure though. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Two Blondinis
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 2:07pm
We wanted to find out but she wouldn't share, I was really dissappointed at the time (I'm totally a pressie shaker  ) but it was kinda cool to have it announced that we had a beautiful baby girl
We had unisex stuff to last the first weeks or so and when I was up to it we went and spent A LOT of money on girly stuff 
Don't know what I'd do next time as I still have those unisex NB clothes ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
 
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Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 2:14pm
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I don't do surprises, so just as well I've had co-operative bubs. With Maya I had a gut feeling she was a girl from day one so I wanted to know for sure, and with the gremlins I thought that I'd really, really, really need the time to get used to the idea of identical twin boys if that was the case - just to prepare the house for the onslaught of chaos! Of course they're girls, but chaos still reigns here... -------------  Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 2:15pm
| Oh yeah, another bonus of not finding out is that you can make money off people and their willingness to enter into wagers on the sex... I feel this is only fair seeing as you have to go through the pregnancy and deal with all the "unpleasantries" by yourself. |
Posted By: MyBelly
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 3:21pm
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haha, fair enough, well i've been thinking about it so much lately! i tried doing the "old wives tales" and found out babys heart beat was 156 bpm and they say if its over 140 that its a girl but then i have been craving anything with xtra salt on it, and apparently that means its a boy!
but i stil dont know, i would love to kno but also it must be the most amazing suprise on the day of the birth, but i dont really mind as long as it is healthy! Oh i dont know haha |
Posted By: my4beauties
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 3:27pm
Its a bit of a myth about the heartbeat thing I think. Both my boy & girl had quite fast heartbeats - over 150. This one has been around 140 - 150 so can't tell either way .
Everyone says if its a fast heartbeat its a girl... my MW has always said the opposite! Think she's the only one though. Do you have a feeling as to what it is? ------------- My babies: R (9),G (7), J (5) http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: MyBelly
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 3:34pm
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honestly i have felt from the day i knew i was pregnant that it was a boy, my partner also told me he thought it is a boy, we cant find any girls names we like either!! dont know if this means anything.
I was also told by a zimbabwean (sp) friend that it was a boy, and he has an uncanny past of being right about these things! |
Posted By: emz
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 4:23pm
| I want to find out, DH hasn't decided what he wants to do. I'm too impatient and also I want to get things sorted before DH goes overseas (away while bubs is born and for the 4 months after). I think for him, it would be nice to connect with the child more knowing the gender before he goes away. That way I also don't have to worry about trying to remember two choices for names! |
Posted By: BellaB
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 4:35pm
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We are definitely not going to find out. We don't get many surprises in life these days, so we'll just wait.
Each to their own though. |
Posted By: miss
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 4:45pm
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Birth itself will be surprise enough for me.
We finally found out at our growth scan last week after an unobliging bubs at the previous scans. Both of us wanted to know - we are both planners and while i have yet to buy anything pink since finding out, I feel better prepared mentally (not that we cared either way). it does cut down the list of names you need to look at by 50% too, which is a bonus. -------------  
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Posted By: EllenMumof2
Date Posted: 15 May 2007 at 4:55pm
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me to i don't do surprises either i have to be organised and when madison wouldn't uncross her legs i made the scan lady pork her to open it took awhile but she opened up and with this one i will found out because if its a boy i will sell all maddys baby clothes on trade me to buy clothes for a boy -------------  
 
Kalem 6! |